Why are the closest ones to you are not very supportive?

They are simply depited since they see how you are able to make things change for you - while they are obviously not.
I've heard so many times from people "Oh, I need to drop some weight here" - while they are just eating their second dessert.

One of my MFP friend around has a very supportive wife - it's extremely rare ; people are always looking to project into somebody's else Life.
In the end, the more successfull in Life you will be, the less close support you would easily find

.. the Sartre said "L'Enfer c'est les Autres."
:laugh:
("hell is other people" )

Misery loves company, but no one wants to only hear about one subject. Keep weight loss a part of your life, not your entire life.

Because people are scared of change and feel out of control when something constant starts changing rapidly. When they say "Oh you've changed!" it means they're upset that you are no longer prepared to live life their way. A true friend would be happy for you and support you, not dump on you!

My fiance is supportive, and my best friend and I do this together.
My in-laws to be always comment on me not eating a lot. But I don't think anyone is really hurting my progress or being down on it.
Those who are are probably insecure..

There are dozens of reasons based on your relationship dynamic.
1. They dont think you are serious, so they dont wanna be either.
2. Theyve heard it all before and are over it.
3. They are jealous.
4. They dont care---this isnt bad, but many ppl dont get vested in something unless it has a direct impact on their lives.
5. Any number of things.....dont always hate on non supportive people....many times they are ignorant as to the fact they arent being supportive.....just worry about yourself and let them have their own problems.

its so much easier for people to bring others down than to build them up. Mostly its a fear we will succeed in our quest, jealousy, feeling bad about themselves, etc.

I'm a doer and not a talker. I don't talk about my weight loss, I don't talk about eating healthy, and exercise with the people close to me unless they engage the conversation and ask or are working towards similar goals. I've found that co-workers, friends, and family who struggle with weight or being healthy but aren't trying to do anything about it just turn an ugly face toward me if I mention anything about my healthy lifestyle. If they want to change themselves only they can do it - and when and if they seek advice I will give it and be supportive. MFP is a great place to get support and give it! That's why I love this site!!!!!!! :-)

Feed them laxitives and have the last laugh...mwahahahahaha!!!!

No, but seriously, I know how that is. I am lucky now though, because I have pretty much whipped them all into submission.

I like this one!

But I feel for you. I'm sorry to hear that your close ones are not giving you the support I'm sure you deserve. I've learned that personal journeys are taken alone, and no one can hold your hand or help you or even offer help or support. There will never be someone else who is 100% on your side. Everyone has their own agenda, or insecurities, or more specifically, weight hang-ups. I know this might not make you feel any better because naturally we expect our friends to be as happy for us as we are. This is rarely the case though. That's why you join these forums or Weight Watchers etc., to join like minded people who understand your struggle and the sacrifices and the sense of accomplishment of achieving your weight goal. Everyone else will not, and can not, understand 100% what it's like for you.

I would think my best friend would be thrilled about me losing weight and encouraging, but she thinks I'm just trying to brag and rub it in her face! :frown: Which is not the case at all, I'm just ecstatic because I've never been this motivated before ever! :bigsmile: I come here to mfp to vent a little and see if anyone can sympathize with me here? I told her how I felt and she said "I'm happy for you but I don't feel like being encouraging every day!" I want to thank everyone on here with their success stories and encouragement, because that gives me motivation and the desire to keep moving forward! Good-luck everyone and God bless.

Sometimes when you're happy, making good decisions for yourself (whether it's fitness/health, personal relationships, etc), it shines a big, huge shiny mirror in the face of THEIR own shortcomings/areas of improvement/whatever you want to call it. It's also hard for people to accept change - You are making positive changes and that requires them to re-evaluate and sort of "re-categorize" you in their minds. This process also means that THEY are going to be re-categorized in their own minds as well, in relation to your new position (i.e. they may not be the "same" or the "skinnier" of the two of you, they might now be the "larger" one while you are the "smaller" one, etc).

She's taking it personally (as are you, not that I blame you). It's really not about you at all. It's the fact that she's unhappy with herself. And as others have said, it is true, that unfortunately sometimes people have a difficult time celebrating the victories of others because they don't have victories to celebrate themselves.

I had this happen to me, once with a friend regarding weight loss and another with a different friend in regards to my new, happy relationship. In the first, my friend literally staged an "intervention" when we started discussing body fat and how my personal trainer had asked me how low I wanted to get my body fat (i.e. 16-18% (really fit) or lower (12-14%, elite athlete status)). At the time I hadn't committed to doing anything, I just thought we were having a conversation, but she freaked out. In a HUGE way. She kept saying it was "unhealthy" to be that low in body fat (to which I asked her, being so fit you're equivalent to an elite athlete is 'unhealthy'??), but what I realized was, she didn't like the change, what it meant to her position in relation to me and that it was a big mirror to ALL the things she WASN'T doing (making good fitness/health decisions).

In the second scenario, my relationship with my new boyfriend (at the time) basically brought up insecurities and jealousy in a good friend of mine, who had just broken up with a guy a few months prior. I felt that she couldn't be "happy" for me, because it just shined a great big light on the gaping hole she felt she had in her life (the lack of a significant other). In both of these cases, it really had nothing to do with ME. It was about the OTHER person and their own inability to cope/manage or change their situations.

I guess what I'm saying (not very succinctly), is that it's really about the OTHER person. Their actions, thoughts, reactions, are all a reflection of who they are, their experiences, fears, insecurities. Don't let them making it about YOU. You're doing fine. Keep at it.

I think sometimes that when we make a positive change in our lives, one of the 'side-effects' is that you highlight those that aren't. It's an uncomfortable place to be - to be shown up for not doing all you could do in the face of someone else who is.

It's not jealousy as such, more an uncomfortable place to be. When you talk to her about your weight loss, new mind set, better health etc. in some ways you are forcing her to reflect on herself also. I would bet that she has apsects about herself that she doesn't like, I would also bet that she has spoken to you about them in the past. She now knows you are doing something about yours and that she isn't doing anything about hers.

Also, it's quite possible you're going on a bit and boring her to death!