Question for the men

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  • calvert6183
    calvert6183 Posts: 539 Member
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    Its annoying and stupid. We hate it. Its games and what is the one thing women say they hate? Its a guy who plays games. We hate women who plays games too. It should be simple, either two people are into each other or not. If you tease or play hard to get, you will lose him to another woman who shows she wants him.
  • savlyon
    savlyon Posts: 474 Member
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    He offered me a ride to my house which he knew was walking distance... I mean seriously. That one little "no thank you" just ruined everything.

    If that "no thank you" ruined everything then who cares if the relationship is gone? That makes him sound like a manipulative controlling *kitten*, and you a weak minded woman who will do anything to please him.

    WHICH I'M SURE YOU AREN'T!!!! But it sounds like the beginning of a bad relationship.

    Maybe next time you could suggest he walk you home.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
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    Guys ... And girl ... Everyone is making some pretty huge assumptions here. We don't know what the OP means by hard to get! Saying know to a ride home that is a few minutes walk is not playing hard to get. Also, this is yet another incident that cannot be justifiably resolved because no one but the two in question were involved. If she had have said ok to the lift, would the thread be she was too easy?

    Personally, I would be more concerned about a guy who is asking personal questions about another member of MFP knowing that she will be able to see the questions and responses. Not very responsible or dare I say, mature. This is something for the two people in question to talk about not MFP world! If think it is very embarrassing for the girl, and him, to have everyone discussing it. Difference being he asked for it and she didn't!

    Are you referring to another thread? Your response has me completely lost. I mainly just started the thread to find out if I threw mixed signals at this guy by not accepting his ride. Honestly I think if he really likes me, then turning him down for one ride won't dissuade him. If it does, well there are other men out there that are far less sensitive.
  • CoachDMarz
    CoachDMarz Posts: 29
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    Well... it really wasn't intentional. I had my reasons for turning him down for the ride. It really had nothing to do with playing games. But I was scared that turning him down for the ride might make him think I wasn't interested or playing hard to get.

    you're all good .. I dunno I kind of like a challenge .. so saying no is not a bad thing just say it in a playful way let him know its not cuz u dont like him and keep going from there .. playing hard to get and playing games is kind of different to me
  • Cakepiebeer
    Cakepiebeer Posts: 392
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    playing hard to get will never get me
  • achief192
    achief192 Posts: 192
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    I personally don't like when a girl plays hard to get. I have a difficult enough time reading clues from women without trying to figure out if she is playing hard to get or just isn't into me :)
  • JanineHarrison
    JanineHarrison Posts: 164 Member
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    He offered me a ride to my house which he knew was walking distance... I mean seriously. That one little "no thank you" just ruined everything.

    I'm not a dude, but if he likes you then one "no thank you" wouldn't ruin everything. If that was a move he'll try again, if you don't want to wait approach him with something equally as simple.

    You don't have to jump straight into a relationship. Hang out, be friends and see what happens... as a friend of a friend that you don't really know, you may find out that you aren't interested in anything more.
  • TK266
    TK266 Posts: 3,689 Member
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    I am a rule of three kinda of guy. I'll give it three shot before I decide if the person "hard to get" or "just unattainable". After three tries, I will assume the person is not into me, which is ok.

    PS. If the person looks at me and says "not if I lost a bet!!!" on my first shot, I will take the hint. :laugh: :laugh:
  • pewitte
    pewitte Posts: 1 Member
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    I'd lose interest and move on.
  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
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    He offered me a ride to my house which he knew was walking distance... I mean seriously. That one little "no thank you" just ruined everything.

    If that "no thank you" ruined everything then who cares if the relationship is gone? That makes him sound like a manipulative controlling *kitten*, and you a weak minded woman who will do anything to please him.

    WHICH I'M SURE YOU AREN'T!!!! But it sounds like the beginning of a bad relationship.

    Maybe next time you could suggest he walk you home.

    Some of the women here are frighteningly hostile if they percieve a man as having done anything wrong.
  • UponThisRock
    UponThisRock Posts: 4,522 Member
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    Personally, I enjoy it more when she says "no."
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
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    Personally, I enjoy it more when she says "no."

    :wink:
  • CoachDMarz
    CoachDMarz Posts: 29
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    You shouldn't "play" hard to get; you should actually BE hard to get.

    Pretty much sums it up right there
  • caroldot
    caroldot Posts: 388 Member
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    He offered me a ride to my house which he knew was walking distance... I mean seriously. That one little "no thank you" just ruined everything.

    So now you ask him out for coffee so that way he knows you are actually interested....and let nature take its course!
  • mrFerris
    mrFerris Posts: 122 Member
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    Guys ... And girl ... Everyone is making some pretty huge assumptions here. We don't know what the OP means by hard to get! Saying know to a ride home that is a few minutes walk is not playing hard to get. Also, this is yet another incident that cannot be justifiably resolved because no one but the two in question were involved. If she had have said ok to the lift, would the thread be she was too easy?

    Personally, I would be more concerned about a guy who is asking personal questions about another member of MFP knowing that she will be able to see the questions and responses. Not very responsible or dare I say, mature. This is something for the two people in question to talk about not MFP world! If think it is very embarrassing for the girl, and him, to have everyone discussing it. Difference being he asked for it and she didn't!

    Apologies if I confused you. I was trying to say that we don't know enough of the situation or circumstances around what constitutes playing hard to get and we don't know what the circumstances of the relationship is like. As it turns out I am in support of you saying no and was not playing hard to gt because I have since learned that you had only met the guy a couple of times and you had your daughter with you. Many people were implying a criticism of you for trying to play hard to get ... I was just suggesting that we can't make a judgement because we don't know the full story.
    Are you referring to another thread? Your response has me completely lost. I mainly just started the thread to find out if I threw mixed signals at this guy by not accepting his ride. Honestly I think if he really likes me, then turning him down for one ride won't dissuade him. If it does, well there are other men out there that are far less sensitive.
  • savlyon
    savlyon Posts: 474 Member
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    He offered me a ride to my house which he knew was walking distance... I mean seriously. That one little "no thank you" just ruined everything.

    If that "no thank you" ruined everything then who cares if the relationship is gone? That makes him sound like a manipulative controlling *kitten*, and you a weak minded woman who will do anything to please him.

    WHICH I'M SURE YOU AREN'T!!!! But it sounds like the beginning of a bad relationship.

    Maybe next time you could suggest he walk you home.

    Some of the women here are frighteningly hostile if they percieve a man as having done anything wrong.

    LOL NOT hostile. I'm saying, if by turning down a ride she is obsessed about how it ruined her chances, then obviously there is a dynamic of control here. She doesn't need to cave to his whims...like, this pleases him, that doesn't please him...I must do everything to make him happy so he likes me.
  • brianward81
    brianward81 Posts: 217 Member
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    The amount of courage it took for me to flirt back when I was single was enormous. If a girl didn't seem interested I would feel incredibly embarrassed and never try again with that girl.

    Now that I am older, wiser and more confident it might not affect the same way but I think games are stupid. I like you, you like me, lets go play Twister. I don't feel like playing any other games with you.
  • gregavila
    gregavila Posts: 725 Member
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    Games suck... don't play them. Honestly, most men suck at little signs and cues so we look at hard to get as not interested.
  • DMZ_1
    DMZ_1 Posts: 2,889 Member
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    A woman playing hard to get annoys us for the most part and we move on to someone else.

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