Should I stop losing weight?

AlmostHot
AlmostHot Posts: 312 Member
edited September 19 in Motivation and Support
Hi I live in Australia and one of my family members asked me to enter the biggest loser competition with her, at the time I said yes and entered with her as I was the only one heavy enough who could do it with her. (Im australia we are having couples again) But since I entered I have actually gotten really sick of feeling the way I did and joined ths site and lost some weight but now I am to light for the competition and I am feeling really good. the applications close at the end of july and will find out if we make it to the next round in august (will only have a couple of weeks to pack some weight on).

I know we dont have much chance but when my partner entered by herself last time 2 years ago she almost got in it was down to her and another girl, so we could get close. Anyway she is determined that this is the only way she can lose the weight. And she is loved by the whole family (I am the outsider)

I worry that this is her only chance and will I let her down and disapoint the whole family if I dont help her out. What do you think, should I stop losing weight for a while and be selfless or continue and be selfish?

Replies

  • misty589
    misty589 Posts: 319 Member
    losing weight is not selfish!
    I don`t think you should sacrifice your health for anything. You`re doing good and feeling great keep it up! and maybe give her some tips too. she doesn`t need a tv show to lose weight that`s just a crutch
  • lgolden
    lgolden Posts: 164
    losing weight is not selfish!
    I don`t think you should sacrifice your health for anything. You`re doing good and feeling great keep it up! and maybe give her some tips too.

    Agreed!
  • SHBoss1673
    SHBoss1673 Posts: 7,161 Member
    Wait, let me get this straight, you are considering re-gaining weight to enter a SHOW? Well, I'm sorry, but no, no way, this shouldn't even be a consideration for you. Your health and well being is far more important then a show. And if your family member is really interested in becoming healthy, forget the show, do it on their own!

    That's how I feel anyway.
  • AlmostHot
    AlmostHot Posts: 312 Member
    I dont want to do the show, but I feel pressured, what if I ruin her chances? What do I tell her? I feel terrible:ohwell:
  • SHBoss1673
    SHBoss1673 Posts: 7,161 Member
    I dont want to do the show, but I feel pressured, what if I ruin her chances? What do I tell her? I feel terrible:ohwell:

    Tell her, that's just the way it goes (maybe in nicer terms than that though). If she loves you, then she will understand that your health is more important to you than her being on the show. Give her all the support you can, offer to help her become more healthy, don't be mean about it, but you can't forestall your plans for a better life just because she wants you to join the show with her.
  • AlmostHot
    AlmostHot Posts: 312 Member
    Im not ready to sabotage myself, I feel to good, I'll think it over! hopefully we wont even make it past the first round.hmmmm or should I just tell her??? oh I am such a coward!!! agh, Ill keep thinking and losing for now:tongue:
  • MFR1974
    MFR1974 Posts: 92
    Keep loosing weight! I would tell her you would be happy to help her loose weight by showing her the tools of how you did it. The devil is trying to convince her that fame will give her self worth and make her feel better about herself. What a horrible deception. I'll pray that God's will be done for you both.
  • PureAndHealthy
    PureAndHealthy Posts: 539
    If it were me, I would keep trying to do what I need to do to be healthy and if I get too light for the show, whoops! Oh well... I would just say "Oh that stinks. I'm sorry. You'll have to find somebody heavier to do it with you since I don't qualify."
  • grt2balv
    grt2balv Posts: 1
    You said the prospect of going on the show was making you sick. No one especially someone who cares for you, should put their own well being over a friends in my opinion. Your friend will likely be disappointed however she should recognize (in time) that her friends health and well being trumps a personal mandate. She should also recognize that gathering forces to lay on a guilt trip does nothing to nurture a friendship.
  • moujie
    moujie Posts: 229
    the thing is...if you're motivated right now and you stop you risk completely losing your mojo. And then what good would you be on the show anyway? If you feel good about what you're doing for yourself then you need to keep going. I know it's not the same as having the resources of the show...but why can't you do your own biggest loser at home? my coworkers and I are doing it and it's great motivation and camraderie.
  • thirtyby40
    thirtyby40 Posts: 702 Member
    Do not let your friend make you feel guilty. You have obviously found a way to improve your health. Why not offer to help her along without going on the show. Trust me we all sit in our living rooms eyes glues to the TV wishing we had that chance to lose weight like they do. But the truth is we do. Maybe not as rapidly, but have you seen how many go back up after the seasons end. Your friend needs to stop focussing on the show and just do it already. You are not accountable for anyones happiness but your own. Sometimes you need to ask yourself what value you are getting from a friendship. A true friend would never ask you to back peddle your progress to suit their needs.

    Best of luck!
  • sheofthesea
    sheofthesea Posts: 123 Member
    I'm pretty sure that you've gotten the impression that we're all behind you sticking to your own plan. I know how hard it is, but I know you can do it. Whether you go the "oops, I guess I'm too skinny" route, or you just flat out tell her that you don't want to do it, it doesn't matter. Please try to be strong and do the right thing for YOU! We're here for you if it gets tough.
  • JDHINAZ
    JDHINAZ Posts: 641 Member
    You're conundrum struck me as ironic. Most overweight and out of shape people are that way because they are not focused on doing what is right for themselves. Sometimes it's because we are so concerned with trying to make sure all of those around us have what they need/want that we don't focus on what we need ourselves.

    It seems you're now doing exactly what you need to do for yourself. Don't take on the responsibilties of others at the risk of doing what is right for you. Your friend is responsible for her own fitness goals. The show isn't her only hope of getting in shape, just as you've already proven it isn't yours. You can be her best cheerleader, but please stay focused your YOUR goals and journey. Good luck to you and your friend!
  • daywater
    daywater Posts: 20
    Not putting yourself FIRST is what got all of us with serious weight issues in to BIG ( literally and figuratively) trouble. DO NOT GAIN WEIGHT FOR ANOTHER PERSON! If your family loves you and this person loves you as well she will want you to be healthy and not jeopardize YOUR health for her own lack of will. :heart: yourself.


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  • onfleur
    onfleur Posts: 159 Member
    Don't do it, Dont do it, dont do it!!!
  • AlmostHot
    AlmostHot Posts: 312 Member
    Thanks Everyone for your responses, I actually took your advice and pulled out. I told my friend that I wasn't willing to put the weight back on because it is to hard to take off and Im feeling great.:embarassed:

    She was really disappointed. :brokenheart: I gave her acess to my food and exercise diaries and the link to MFP. But she said that she is happy I found something that works for me and there is always next year! I am soooo sad :cry: to hear that she is willing to spend yet another year obese and try for biggest loser again, :sad: I sooo wish for her to feel as I am feeling now.

    Empowered, Inspired, Excited! :bigsmile: Thank you all at MFP!

    Lost 3.7 pounds while I contemplated:laugh:
  • ilike2moveit
    ilike2moveit Posts: 776 Member
    Keep losing. She needs to dig deep and help herself and not depend on you and shows etc.
  • femmerides
    femmerides Posts: 843 Member
    hey, maybe if you lose enough on your own she'll finally realize that you don't need a show to lose weight. but unfortunately, she seems to happy to be overweight. she's only willing to try if she goes on a show. i mean, i guess it's better than nothing but come on, really? poor girl. but we were all there once. hopefully she'll realize that life is too short and just gets shorter the more weight you have on you. good luck!
  • ivykivy
    ivykivy Posts: 2,970 Member
    It does kinda sounds like she's more interested in being on the Biggest Loser than on being a big loser.
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