emotional eating and self-sabbotage

laurakrowe
laurakrowe Posts: 52
edited November 10 in Motivation and Support
I am a huge emotional eater. i eat the worst when i'm upset or angry. ie: i was doing so well today (1 hr of cardio, really healthy choices) till i got a call from mechanic re: my car's repairs being over $1k. i finished an entire box of girl scout cookies in one sitting. now i hate myself.
i lost 65 pounds in one year and in the past 3 months gained back 15. I feel like giving up.

Replies

  • MountainMia
    MountainMia Posts: 242 Member
    It's not worth giving up. It's SOOOO not worth giving up! I know! I'm losing 100 lbs AGAIN for the 3rd time. I'm an emotional eater too am really working on finding better coping mechanisms. Talking to a friend, or MFP peops, exercise, crafts or hobbies that involve hands ect. are all good outlets.

    Forget the cookies. That's a mistake of the past, move forward from here with new resolve to make healthy choices.

    P.S. 50 lbs is amazing and no small accomplishement. Healthy lifestyle changes can happen no matter how sick or weak you may feel. You did it before, you can do it again!
  • rjt1000
    rjt1000 Posts: 700 Member
    I am a huge emotional eater. i eat the worst when i'm upset or angry. ie: i was doing so well today (1 hr of cardio, really healthy choices) till i got a call from mechanic re: my car's repairs being over $1k. i finished an entire box of girl scout cookies in one sitting. now i hate myself.
    i lost 65 pounds in one year and in the past 3 months gained back 15. I feel like giving up.

    Look at it this way- you went over your calorie goal for a day. Big deal! Tomorrow's another day and you can hit your goals again. I have a day every couple weeks where I indulge. But my indulging is now 2500 calories, going 800 or so over my goal rather than 4500 or more calories as it used to be.

    Remember, they're goals, not laws. Focus on the 50 pounds you're down and get back to your healthy pattern.
  • godricshollow
    godricshollow Posts: 274 Member
    Don't give up! One bad day in the week isn't going to ruin the progress you have made this far. 50lbs is a HUGE accomplishment, you should be so proud of yourself. Don't let car and money drama make you want to throw in the towel.
  • knight76306
    knight76306 Posts: 233 Member
    You sound like me. I know exactly where you're coming from. I'm the same way. I lost 110+ pounds about 3 years ago. Divorce = stress eating. I finally have my head back in the game. Just remember this - You are worth it! No food you eat will ever make you feel better in the long run. You have to start looking at food as fuel. You eat to fuel your body for the next event (work, gym, play, whatever).

    Don't give up!
  • XXXMinnieXXX
    XXXMinnieXXX Posts: 3,459 Member
    Well that is a terribly stressful day, so venting it in some way is understandable. Just tell yourself this is making you miserable and it has to change. I am not going to choose failure when success is a option. I am worth the effort. I will fight for my happiness. I have proved I can do this, so let's kick myself up the *kitten* and finish what I started. Writing down thoughts an feelings in a diary is helping me not to binge as often as its a good way to vent your frustrations, maybe give it a go. When you feel like that make yourself busy do some exercise, cleaning, post on here... Occupy yourself and it will usually pass. Also log a binge as you eat it, and as you see the calories going up something will snap and you will say enough is enough. These methods stop me most of the time! X
  • thank you guys. i am just so stressed - being home all day w/ kids and dealing w/ my car and money and life in general - it's like my only outlet is food! :(
  • 714rah714
    714rah714 Posts: 759 Member
    The girl scout cookie boxes are getting smaller and smaller, so there are probably only three cookies in the box now, so don't worry about it.
  • Emmabulliemum
    Emmabulliemum Posts: 294 Member
    You've lost 50Lbs that's amazing! we all have off days and as I have been told this is a lifestyle change DON'T see it as a diet it's a way to be healthy and happy.

    One slip up is not a reason to give up we all cope with stress in different ways. may be you should invest in a push bag for stress releif :-)

    Feel free to add me as a friend I'm new on here and just ereading what you've done so far has inspired me x
  • sandown12
    sandown12 Posts: 648 Member
    Hi Im an emotional eater too been with my partner 9 years this year hes given me 4 engagement rings he wont set a date this leads to me emotionally eating ?
    I lost 57lbs in 2010 so I regained 42 in 2011 so Im here again.

    I keep a emotions diary when Im having a bad time which this years been every other day seriously with so much horrid stuff and the diarys working (((hugs))) for you its one reason many of us are on a yoyo cycle we eat as something upsets us we put on weight as we are upset at gaining weight so we eat more.

    You are never alone xx
  • Please don't give up, you can do this and you have done so well. I too comfort eat, once i start i find it really difficult to stop! Just keep telling yourself you are worth it and keep picturing yourself the size you want to be. Good luck x
  • I completely understand--- Have several stress factors. I'm also a HUGE emotional eater. One week I have lost .2 pound and another week only .6 pound. I've been following the plan to lose 2 pounds weekly. I feel it is taking forever. People are telling me as long as I'm going down, I'm doing great... It is truly difficult though.

    I'm curious what people would do to cope with stress especially when homeschooling three children and going through separation.
  • DO NOT give up. Control life, don't let it control you. You can do this. Sent you a request, let's get after it woman!
  • StaceyL76
    StaceyL76 Posts: 711 Member
    It happens, I do the same thing. It is about learning what we can do in place of eating when we are emotional. What worked for me for a while was drinking some hot tea or herbals. It is so comforting. I have not been doing that. I am up 10llbs from my lowest too. We can do this, we have done this. It is about learning how to keeping doing this consistently. Never ever give up - You are worth fighting for.
  • Kassileigh
    Kassileigh Posts: 28 Member
    oooh I so hear you.

    I was doing so well and then, fell off the healthy eating regime wagon, and got run over (by the wagon) and I have been eating like an eating thing since then...

    I need help :(
  • StaceyL76
    StaceyL76 Posts: 711 Member
    DO NOT give up. Control life, don't let it control you. You can do this. Sent you a request, let's get after it woman!

    What he said! How awesome!
  • JanieJack
    JanieJack Posts: 3,831 Member
    The most important thing is to keep pressing, even after "messing up," and never give up. If you have a bad day, pick yourself up and keep going. You can do it.
  • OSC_ESD
    OSC_ESD Posts: 752 Member
    Unfortunately emotional eating is a huge problem in society ... You lose control by circumstances and it's almost like an out of body experience ... you don't realize the damage until AFTER the disaster. I know this .... because I " used " to be one.

    How did I change that about myself ? I started to separate food from emotion. Meaning I had to make myself realize that nothing I consume will determine the outcome of my situation ... and at the worst, it will make it even harder as I fail in my goals of trying to achieve a healthy lifestyle.

    I looked at how hard I work to maintain my calories and the workouts, ohhhhh the workouts ! How could one " treat " be worth an entire days sacrifices ???? It never seemed to register until one day I started saying out loud " Ok Tracey ... is this REALLY worth destroying all your efforts " ... I kept repeating this out loud along with " I work way to hard to blow it now " ... over and over. To my surprise it worked ! It didn't relieve my emotional pain ... but it didn't add more fuel to the fire and that was a huge step ! Cause in the end everything has a way of working itself out ... EXCEPT for those extra pounds ! Now a days I workout my emotional " issues " through my exercise. Start out slowly by going for a walk, swim ... or a bike ride. Whatever you enjoy.

    And I don't give up what I love to eat ... I just eat a " little " on a good day and make sure it's in my calorie allowance for the day. Never look to food for comfort .. look at it as the fuel needed to run well equipped machine.

    On a different note ... I started to understand that life will have many bumps along the way and that no worrying has ever changed an outcome. Coming to terms with reality was a far better experience and finding a solution was key. I can honestly say I haven't had a emotional " fall " in a really long time. It feels really good to have complete control over your emotions and getting to that point is worth every step of the battle !

    Best of luck ! :smile:
  • Kassileigh
    Kassileigh Posts: 28 Member
    Unfortunately emotional eating is a huge problem in society ... You lose control by circumstances and it's almost like an out of body experience ... you don't realize the damage until AFTER the disaster. I know this .... because I " used " to be one.

    How did I change that about myself ? I started to separate food from emotion. Meaning I had to make myself realize that nothing I consume will determine the outcome of my situation ... and at the worst, it will make it even harder as I fail in my goals of trying to achieve a healthy lifestyle.

    I looked at how hard I work to maintain my calories and the workouts, ohhhhh the workouts ! How could one " treat " be worth an entire days sacrifices ???? It never seemed to register until one day I started saying out loud " Ok Tracey ... is this REALLY worth destroying all your efforts " ... I kept repeating this out loud along with " I work way to hard to blow it now " ... over and over. To my surprise it worked ! It didn't relieve my emotional pain ... but it didn't add more fuel to the fire and that was a huge step ! Cause in the end everything has a way of working itself out ... EXCEPT for those extra pounds ! Now a days I workout my emotional " issues " through my exercise. Start out slowly by going for a walk, swim ... or a bike ride. Whatever you enjoy.

    And I don't give up what I love to eat ... I just eat a " little " on a good day and make sure it's in my calorie allowance for the day. Never look to food for comfort .. look at it as the fuel needed to run well equipped machine.

    On a different note ... I started to understand that life will have many bumps along the way and that no worrying has ever changed an outcome. Coming to terms with reality was a far better experience and finding a solution was key. I can honestly say I haven't had a emotional " fall " in a really long time. It feels really good to have complete control over your emotions and getting to that point is worth every step of the battle !

    Best of luck ! :smile:

    Wow. Thank you x
  • as i feel myself getting crazy, i immediately start thinking about food. i will think about "after i drop my daughter off to preschool i can go through the dunkin donuts drive thru and get coffee and donuts" and as i'm driving home in my car eating donuts i can only cry b/c i know it's SO STUPID that i'm doing this and yet it feels like i can't stop.
    Food is my comfort. i've never really had anyone to talk to about my feelings and food was always there for me.
    this is so hard!!!
  • cmb67
    cmb67 Posts: 46 Member
    My problem is I know I am doing myself no good, I know I am going to feel bad about myself (& stuffed) after I eat, but night after night, I sit on the couch after my daughter is in bed and just munch out. On crap, of course. I can't think of any reason why I'm self-sabotaging, and I wish I could, because it might make it easier to stop. It's like my relax time...

    I just don't know what to do. Any hints? (throwing everything out in the house that's unhealthy isn't an option due to other residents!)
  • gbelltx
    gbelltx Posts: 142
    Congrats on what you have already accomplished!! Also it’s a good thing that you recognize that you are an emotional eater. Now take what you know and address the issues by making goals that address the issue. Example.. Start small Each week at least one time when you are on the onset of emotional give yourself credit for recognize it coming, then choose to skip one emotional eating binge per week however you choose and depending on you begin to add more days per week as you get stronger.. Make the reward taking your kids out to the park since one of the reasons you are working on getting healthy is to be a more energetic parent for your kids. Easier said than done.. But all of us know it’s never easy. Even when you do binge then it’s about getting back up, dusting yourself off and getting back after it. The issue comes when you consistently binge multiple times during the week and give up on the exercise. Bottom line refocus your goals, set simple baby steps to obtain your goals and reward yourself, and surround yourself with positive influence!!! You got this!!
  • MountainMia
    MountainMia Posts: 242 Member
    Hey! Ya made it through the night and you're still here... checking in on MFP... woot! We all do the self pitty-self sabbotage-self loathe thing once in a while. You had your turn on the pitty cycle. Now it's time to get back to work. My favorite way to break the cycle is a good old fashioned tantrum. Do you have a treadmill or a safe trail near your home? Put on the meanest music you can find and run like hell. If you can scream and punch and kick a training bag without scaring people around you, that will work too. Everything looks better after a good adrenaline-pumping tantrum... but they might put you in the nut house if you don't make it look like exercise. :noway:

    An aggressive exercise tantrum has definitely been a good thing for me... and probably the kids... and maybe even the dog. It releases the pressure that was making me so anxious, gives me a dramatic way to express my intense feelings, frustrations or disappointments, and gives me a way to counteract my sick "non-coping" binge habit. Sometimes you just gotta throw your head back and really wail!

    My dad's favorite words for everything good, bad or ugly is: "It won't last." Just remember that nothing stays the same. Times will always get worse or better and all you can do is make your time count for better. Break the cycle! A Donut bender won't fix it and it won't even make you feel better. I guarantee you, an aggressive exercise tantrum will make a change for the better. The situation may not change for the better, but you will. It's empowering. Give it a try and let me know how it goes.
  • Stephaniededeyan
    Stephaniededeyan Posts: 18 Member
    Don't give up, don't give up!! We all have those bad days (or weeks :s) it's okay we are only human. But tomorrow is another day, a clean slate, a fresh start. Leave yesterday in the past and keep going with a positive outlook!
  • I'm definitely an emotional eater too. Jillian Michael's actually sent this out today so I though I'd share....

    How To Turn A Problem Into An Opportunity
    By Jillian Michaels


    Sure, it’s tough to pinpoint the root of your problems. However, if you've been examining your emotional eating habits, you should be seeing some behavioral shifts. Are you checking to see if you're actually hungry versus just looking to feed your emotions? Do you have go-to non-food outlets to help you express your emotions? Whether it’s grabbing your journal and getting your feelings out on paper or getting together with a friend for a hike or manicure and some feel-good bonding, you CAN make sure you get on (and stay on!) a healthy path.

    There's one final aspect of emotional eating you need to address — what to do when you can't resolve an issue or a situation at the exact moment when it is triggering you to behave self-destructively. Certain obstacles can sometimes seem insurmountable, and the next time you encounter one, I want you to ask yourself the following question:
    How can I turn this problem into an opportunity?
    Instead of allowing this event or emotion to cause permanent damage to your self-esteem, try looking at it in a different light. If you've recently gone through a breakup, for example, realize that the end of one relationship simply means that you are free to find someone better for you. Allow yourself to feel sad, but try to stay positive and find meaning in the pain rather than numbing it with food and indulging in other destructive habits. You will grow from it in amazing ways, I promise.
  • Thank you for sharing Jillian Michael's tip.
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