I need to talk

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fit4mom
fit4mom Posts: 1,352 Member
in Chit-Chat
So I have a need to debrief and am just looking for kindness. Can you help?

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  • Phoenyx0189
    Phoenyx0189 Posts: 80
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    of course!
  • iwisheyes
    iwisheyes Posts: 95
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    Listening! Feel free to add me...
  • fit4mom
    fit4mom Posts: 1,352 Member
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    So I move in family, have my kid (10 years of age try to manipulate me in a mean bully way, and am being unappreciated for EVERYTHING ! Not pouting just feel alone. Ok a little. LOL
    Just feel alone and need to vent./
  • cstew44
    cstew44 Posts: 24 Member
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    I'm here . . . vent away . . . sounds like you're in a tough spot . . .
  • Phoenyx0189
    Phoenyx0189 Posts: 80
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    Well it's nice that you can vent here. Not to sound rude, buuuut your kid is 10. 10 year olds tend to be manipulative. You are an adult, you are the mom, you make the decisions and the money, so there's really not much your child can do other than be a brat. When I was 10, I know I didn't know much about being appreciative, but my mom certainly never let me get away with being disrespectful lol. I don't know if your child is even being disrespectful, but I'm just saying that you are the boss!
  • fit4mom
    fit4mom Posts: 1,352 Member
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    Not so much a tough spot as a difficult challenge and needing encouragement to get to the finish line. I have prayed for years to get these 20 something girls in my life and help them and here it is! They are her and I feel so blessed to have them but then I realize how humbled I am that I'm not perfect and who am I that God would entrust the lives of any individual to me. I am the least likely to reccieve the priviledge of helping anyone to be successful.
    My 10 year old. Said mean things to me that made me cry. It's been a tough day and I thank you all so much for listening,
  • Phoenyx0189
    Phoenyx0189 Posts: 80
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    I can tell that you have a kind and beautiful spirit. You learn from the experiences and tests that God presents you with and you thank Him for it. He never gives you more than you can handle. It's so great to be humble, but you should also be confident in yourself and your abilities. He is! You should be too!
  • fit4mom
    fit4mom Posts: 1,352 Member
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    Well it's nice that you can vent here. Not to sound rude, buuuut your kid is 10. 10 year olds tend to be manipulative. You are an adult, you are the mom, you make the decisions and the money, so there's really not much your child can do other than be a brat. When I was 10, I know I didn't know much about being appreciative, but my mom certainly never let me get away with being disrespectful lol. I don't know if your child is even being disrespectful, but I'm just saying that you are the boss!
    I agree with you. It just totally took me off guard when she asked me to date and then she said a neighboring friend saw me jogging with a man (not her father, and a lie, I havent jogged for months on the road and never with a man) then she fit in would I devorce dad. I reply I don't belive in that (Don't judge people for it) and she ended with I heard screaming and bear cans crushing, THis too was a lie.. It hurt so bad! I just can't believe she said these hurtful things. I need to effectively act toward her in the love of Christ and not react to her because I do have hope for her and desire the best for her. It just really hurt. My heart broke
  • fit4mom
    fit4mom Posts: 1,352 Member
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    I can tell that you have a kind and beautiful spirit. You learn from the experiences and tests that God presents you with and you thank Him for it. He never gives you more than you can handle. It's so great to be humble, but you should also be confident in yourself and your abilities. He is! You should be too!

    I love you for your wonderful beautiful encouraging words. Thank you! That is so awesome!
  • Phoenyx0189
    Phoenyx0189 Posts: 80
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    I honestly don't think she was out to be hurtful. I think that as mean as it was, it came from a place of love and concern. However, she's 10. She doesn't quite know how to express her feelings. And she doesn't know about believing and trusting in the right people. Children are a little naive. As her mother, you have to know that she isn't trying to hurt you, she's trying to protect herself, and you have to explain to her that she can't believe all that she sees and hears. This world is full of lies and misunderstandings.
  • fit4mom
    fit4mom Posts: 1,352 Member
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    I honestly don't think she was out to be hurtful. I think that as mean as it was, it came from a place of love and concern. However, she's 10. She doesn't quite know how to express her feelings. And she doesn't know about believing and trusting in the right people. Children are a little naive. As her mother, you have to know that she isn't trying to hurt you, she's trying to protect herself, and you have to explain to her that she can't believe all that she sees and hears. This world is full of lies and misunderstandings.
    Actually the way it came out was hurtful because she wanted to get her way, My husband agrees with me. But I still forgive her and in equality of your intent I do believe she was not thinking of the consequences of her words. But thank you for the kindness and thoughtfulness towards my 10 year old as I do not desire to tare her down. I was just sad.
  • Phoenyx0189
    Phoenyx0189 Posts: 80
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    Awww, well I am like a professional babysitter, and I have lots of little cousins and one thing I've learned is that EVERY CHILD is capable of being a total brat. I don't care how cute they are, how sweet and well mannered! Every child I know has had AT LEAST two brat moments. I love all my kids dearly and love my little cousins to death, and even they can be jerks lol. When you know that, you don't take it personally lol. They don't know that the world doesn't revolve around them lol. You seem like a great parent and a great woman. I really hope it didn't get to you too much. Wish my mom was more like you when I was a kid.
  • fit4mom
    fit4mom Posts: 1,352 Member
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    I AM SO FRIENDING YOU! if you are willing. LOL (LOL was for the small print. LOL) I was hurt because love hurts. You seem to understand the intent of God and the bible and that makes me greatful for your conversation. It's a plus that you are not a sterio type and that you are you. I love your common sensce knowledge and ability to delve into situations and see reality. You are awesome!
  • fit4mom
    fit4mom Posts: 1,352 Member
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    I just want to thank you all for your wonderful responces. I know for a fact that God used you all in my life for comfort tonight! Thank you!

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