I am new here and a binge overeater.

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Anyone else like me out there? I've been aware for a few years that I do this, but it has taken me that time to figure out my triggers - mainly that I will binge whenever I get the opportunity, and in fact, if I realise I'm going to be alone for a few hours, I plan out that binge. This feels like a huge big secret to me, and I haven't been able to admit the extent of it to anyone in real life. My husband knows I say that I do overeat, but he can't really see when and certainly hasn't seen how much I put away when I do it.

I'm about 5 stones overweight, and ruining what otherwise would be a great life. We were very active people before we had children, and my husband is a naturally healthy eater, healthy weight, and my kids are very healthily slim. But my weight means I am physically not able to do some of the things I'd love to do, and not inclined to.

I've found it frustrating. Most weight loss programmes, etc, are focussed on losing weight, rather than stopping binging. I KNOW how to eat healthily, and my meals are generally pretty healthy, but I can't make it through a single day without some element of a binge happening (if I buy a pack of 8 choc biscuits with the intention of them being for all 5 of us, I'll usually scoff the lot - some binges are small like this, and some are day-long crisp-fests). Then there are the Paul McKenna/Beyond Chocolate type of programmes, which seem better, focussing on eat when you're hungry and stop when you're full, but they still don't really tackle binging.

Increasingly I've realised I need a psychological approach to this problem. CBT and NLP are both recommended, but I can't afford to see someone for this (and my husband who really doesn't get what a problem I've got would not be happy with this expenditure at the moment - having to tighten belt like most people). I have found an NLP CD aimed at tackling Binge Eating, so as of yesterday, I'm giving that a go, and with it, I'm trying to use MFP as my tool for recording my food intake and for some anonymous support.

My poor husband struggles to know how to behave around me and food. He wants to be supportive, but the effect is often just the opposite. And to be fair, we're now at a state of affairs where he can't do right for doing wrong. And he's sick of my schemes to lose weight, can't see why I don't just do it. And neither can I really. So here goes.

Thanks if you've read this far!

Replies

  • AngelaMay63
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    good luck!
  • ludogx87
    ludogx87 Posts: 286 Member
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    i actually know how you feel, i was 5 stone overweight aslo was - 203lbs, i would love if i knew i had the house to myself, i would at the height of my binges, order a pizza, and a chinese take - away, scoff the lot then 8 packets of crisps then hide all the evidence and pretend like it didnt happen.


    knew it was wrong but i CRAVED it. i still do. i dont know what advice to offer you as i am clearly no expert but from one binge eater to another - every day at a time. i joined a slimming club called scottish slimmers and eventually lost 5 and a half stone getting down to 126lbs

    butttttt the binges came back slow and sure. and i put on again :( so now just trying hardest to cut back and take it easy, tis all you can do really

    good luck xx
  • ellie0213
    ellie0213 Posts: 562 Member
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    I too am a binge eater. You are right it is a different problem that regular diet plans do not address because the issue is emotional and not of knowing how to eat properly. I know how to put together a healthy menu what I have trouble with is not eating the entire container of ice cream plus cookies and then whatever else in the house contains sugar or fat and salt.

    I am sending you a friend request. I have done a bit of studying on this. We can talk later. :smile: I am about to head out for the day. It will be alright.
  • Betherella93
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    Hi i am the same too. Sending friend request :)
  • ctsmith
    ctsmith Posts: 79 Member
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    Same here!! I am about 3stone over weight at the moment if you want support add me :-) and good luck!
  • Inglebert
    Inglebert Posts: 39 Member
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    Thank you! A lovely response.
    I hear you with "anything containing sugar or fat and salt"!

    Thank you for friends requests, feel free anyone, as I'd like that support.
  • MarincicS
    MarincicS Posts: 265 Member
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    Wow. That's very rough.

    I have binged, and planned private binges, but i'm not sure it's the same as what you are describing. I actually never learned to eat healthy and that's why, i think, MFP seems to be effective for me (although admittedly i have only started with MFP 3 weeks ago). I record everything - every single thing i put in my mouth or use in preparing food (e.g. every tablespoon of olive oil that goes in the pan). What i'm finding is that i am appalled at calorie/sodium/fat dense foods and that is helping me control it better. I feel like i want to reject those foods and find some sort of alternative that will satisfy - at least partially satisfy.

    I don't think any of my experience will help you though. I just felt compelled to respond because it sounds like you are having such a tough time and seem like you really need some support.

    But i do think the first step for you here is to be painfully honest with yourself in recording every single thing you eat, even if you eat something crazy. Don't share your diary with anyone if that feels too scary. But look at it yourself - not to judge or berate yourself, but to start to analyze what you're doing and maybe work out some ways to control it.

    You are very welcome to friend me if you think that would help. I would be happy to give you pep talks or just listen if you want.
  • m4nd479
    m4nd479 Posts: 6 Member
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    Hey! Welcome to MFP and well done for taking the step to address your issue. I can completely empathise with your situation as I was a binge eater for many years. I used to buy food and hide it in the car so that I could have a massive pig out and no one would know. I would say no to biscuits and chocolates at tea break at work and my colleagues would commend me on my willpower but I 'knew' they were thinking that if I didn't eat that kind of food I wouldnt be as fat as I was. So I would stop at the shop on the way home from work and grab myself a couple of scotch eggs, some crisps, chocolate and eat it all before I got home and then cooked and ate a family dinner! I could demolish a 12 pack of crisps or a whole pack of biscuits and, like you, I would plan a binge if I knew the hubby would be out and the kids were in bed. I used to cry as I was eating because I knew it was wrong! But I couldnt stop myself. I was compelled to eat! I had no control over it!
    So, how did I stop? I asked for help! I saw my GP who diagnosed me with an eating disorder (yes, not all people with an eating disorder are skinny) she prescribed Prozac and referred me for treatment with a psychiatrist. I assume from the language you use that you are in the UK, in which case treatment on the NHS is free (apart from the prescription obviously) so what have you got to lose? Make an appointment with your GP. Ask for help! If you can come on to an Internet forum and lay bare your problems, you can go and speak with a health professional. I'm not saying Prozac is for you or that your GP would prescribe any kind of medication. But! You do need to talk through the issues and work out why you are compelled to do this. What are the triggers?
    I don't take medication any more! Nor see the psychiatrist. But I do recognise situations that would have triggered a binge now! And although I can't always avoid them I can deal with them without feeling compelled to eat. OK, so I'm still overweight but I am dealing with that and it's not easy but I know that it would be a million times harder if I hadn't dealt with my issues when I did
    Feel free to PM me if you want to discuss privately. Sending hugs xx
  • CarolMorris66
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    Another one here also. I don't eat chocolate bars in ones and twos, I eat them in fours and fives!! The same with crisps!
  • dedication6
    dedication6 Posts: 184 Member
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    I'm going to start off saying that I don't understand what you're going through. However, would it be possible to try and motivate yourself that while you have your alone time you could do some sort of exercise instead of eating? Maybe start off with just 10-15 min of doing something (play wii, walk in place,whatever moves you) and maybe work your way up to an hour?

    Good luck on your journey, I wish you the best!
  • Malaika946
    Malaika946 Posts: 107 Member
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    :smile: i WOULD SUGGEST TRYING LOW CALORIES SNACKS. HAVE MANY OF THEM DURING THE DAY. I AM ONE WHO LOVES FOOD. I WOULD WAKE UP LOOKING FORWARD TO WHAT I WOULD EAT DURING THE DAY. AROUND 4 AM I WOULD WAKE UP PUT THE FRYER ON AND HAVE CHIPS AND CHEESE THEN GO BACK TO BED. I WEANED MYSELF OFF BIT BY BIT . NOW EVEN IF I WAKE UP IN THE NIGHT I HAVE NO APPETITE TO EAT. IT WAS HELL THE FIRST THREE NIGHTS AS MY TUMMY WOULD BE PAINFUL FROM HUNGER.

    GOOD LUCK HOPE YOU WILL FIND A WAY.
  • species5618
    species5618 Posts: 1 Member
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    welcome.

    my vice is beer, and like your self, if i have time alone, my thoughts head to stocking up on (the vice beer in my case, food in yours)
    and consume more than i should, of course beer then leeads to snacking, and the problem continues

    I am currenlty at least 7-8 stone over weight, but using MYP I WILL win..

    Re CBT and NLP, the books are very good too
    Some of Melanie Fennell books have work sheets and help you plan and act on the CBT process.
    which is ultimatly a managed self review / feeback process,
    I am not an expert, but reading the books to deal with depression etc

    Good Luck
  • nettip
    nettip Posts: 113 Member
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    Hi i wouldnt say im a binger just eat way to much of the bad stuff. if you can do just one week with out a certain item u normally pig oput on ( mine was fizzy drinks ) to start with at the end of the week have one of the item and you will realise how crap it makes you feel. we used to eat chip shop 3x a week, last 2x we had it as an end of week treat i have not been able to eat it all and felt sick for hours after. now when hubby says shall we have a cheeky chippy, i say no i dont want to feel ill thanks.
  • echoica
    echoica Posts: 339 Member
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    i have been battling eating disorders for 15 years (mostly anorexia and bulimia) - in the most recent years it has been severe binge eating only which led to me gaining 200 lbs. i have done both inpatient and outpatient treatment (CBT) in the past and only now do i feel i have all levels of the "ed" spectrum under control. add me if you like for support :) it's a rough journey but recovery is possible for you!! the key thing is that you recognize this issue and you don't let it go on any longer.
  • zontuin
    zontuin Posts: 72 Member
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    I think your post was extremely brave and I give you the upmost kudos for putting it out there. You are surrounded by supportive people here. I would think that most binge eating is motivated by some underlying feelings or issues that need resolved. I hear you on the budget issues. For myself, when I have some emotional work and growth to accomplish, I always turn to books as I love to read and learn. So while I am in no position to give advice, I will offer that perhaps you can pick up a few books on the topic and try to learn more on your own (which can be very economical). After a quick look, I found "The Schwarzbein Principle" by Diana Schwarzbein and Nancy Deville, and "Overcoming Binge Eating" by Dr. Christopher Fairburn. I am sure there are other books out there. I also highly recommend journaling. When you have the urge to start a binge, instead reach for some pen and paper (or your computer) and spend 15 minutes writing about how you feel and what is going on with you inside. Perhaps over time, you'll have better insight into your triggers. I wish you the best of success, my dear! Your willingness to grow and change will be the seed of your success! You will get there! Hang tough! :smile:
  • emmiee921
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    I am a binge eater too, my binges accure once or twice a week, double the calories i have on a daily basis and the binges
    consist of what food we have in the house e.g. bread up to 5 pieces, cheese on it, crackers, cereal, yoghurt, if theres junk food
    which is rarely...

    the next day i feel so tired and yuk but sometimes i over eat again..
    I've been on a binge the last couple days and have gained 4lbs :(