Bah! New baby coming; what do I do??

MrsCon40 · February 2012

Nice advertising for your blog, dude.

Since men aren't necessarily imbued with the same maternal instincts - I suggest you take some parenting classes.

Mom0fTwo · February 2012

All I can recommend is get out a lot, especially starting while the baby is young. It'll help keep you from going stir crazy. I am in a meetup group for parents, and it has been a real life saver. If you haven't looked into it, try babywearing. It keeps the baby happy by being close to you, and you can have a wrap or something that keeps your hands free.

This^^

Sarahmeridith · February 2012

Once you see that bby you will just figure it all out! After a week or two it will be second nature and you'll never know how you lived without having a child! Enjoy your little one, congrats!

robinogue · February 2012

:flowerforyou: they come with no manuels, no return for a credit and no money back guarantees.. What I can tell you is it's the best thing in the world and you and your new baby will learn each other.. Congrats

PlunderBunneh · February 2012

Our best friends when the little ones were new:

Slumber bear, motion and sound activated, plays an actual recording of womb sounds. With our first, it was as easy as swaddling her up in a flannel blanket nice and snug, pop a binky in her mouth, and set that bear next to her. She'd give us this look "No fair, cheat codes.......zzzzz" It was amazing.

Other than that, be patient. Try to remember that the only way this baby has to communicate right now is crying. He/she is just as frustrated as you are when you don't know why he/she is crying. Try to think through the steps. Hungry? Thirsty? Diaper? Bored? Tired? Hot or cold? Hurt?
Our second had lots of gas issues from formula. It took us a while to figure out, but one of the best gas bubble positions is laying them tummy down across your arm and rubbing their back.
And babies like to hear you sing. It reminds them you are near.

mellymink · February 2012

Buy the book "Happiest Baby on the Block". Seriously. :bigsmile:

I second this!!

kapeluza · February 2012

This..

Go to your bedroom, take 1 sleeping pill and sleep.
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for 6 weeks. You'll thank me later.

Oh I agree on the slumber bear. WHAT A RELIEF! Put that bear on loud mode and relax!

SofaKingRad · February 2012

The baby will turn your whole life upside down, but you'll love them anyways. Just be prepared to roll with everything, because they pose lots of challenges. More when the turn 2 though...

AnninStPaul · February 2012

1) Sleep when the baby sleeps

2) Read "What to Expect the First Year". Buy the disposables they recommend, but you won't need as many clothes and blankets.

3) Sleep when the baby sleeps.

4) Make sure you eat reasonable meals.

5) Sleep when the baby sleeps.

6) Build stroller walks into your day - exercise for you, fresh air that tires them out for baby.

7) Sleep when the baby sleeps.

8) Hold and cuddle as much as you can. Bonding is a good thing.

9) Did I mention to sleep when the baby sleeps?

ilookthetype · February 2012

Nice advertising for your blog, dude.

Since men aren't necessarily imbued with the same maternal instincts - I suggest you take some parenting classes.

Agreed

NoAdditives · February 2012

In 6 weeks, I'll be a new daddy, and I haven't a clue what I'm doing. I've got the essentials I suppose, crib, clothes, bottles, diapers, etc, so the baby will pretty much take care of itself, right? haha - Change it, feed it, let is sleep. Not much else to worry about?

I get to play stay-at-home-dad, so I'm sure I'll have a journey in store. This will be quite the change from daily gym trips and playing PC games though. Anything I really need to know? Am I in for any surprises? I need to know!!

My childcare potential is presumably sub-par from what's required. Uh oh.

-JHoersten2
http://noob-dad.com

It's not as scary or difficult as it seems. Yes, there is a lot to learn. But the great thing is you get to learn it slowly. In the beginning your baby will spend most of the time sleeping. (My newest baby is 6 weeks old and I'm amazed that she's been lying here awake interacting with me for about an hour without needing to eat or needing a diaper.) In the beginning you pretty much just feed them, change them, keep them warm and cuddled.

Some random advice:
Make sure your baby is dressed one layer warmer than you are. If he or she will be swaddled that counts as a layer. If you are wearing long sleeves, your baby should too. (I can't tell you how many short sleeved onesies I was given for this baby when she was due 12/26!)

Use natural products for your baby. I just discovered the Honest Company (honest.com) and they are wonderful! They have natural diapers, wipes, cleaning and bath products. They are delivered to your door every month and they all work wonderfully! And, they're cheaper than the stuff I was buying at Babies R Us. Definitely check them out, especially the "Learn" section.

I really like the Avent bottles. With three bottle babies I've tried lots and lots of bottles. I LOVE the Avent bottles! They don't leak like other bottles, they reduce the amount of air a baby can drink in and there aren't a million little pieces to wash like the Dr. Brown's bottles. If your wife is going to pumping, Avent makes a great breast pump.

My baby absolutely loves her Carter's Cuddle Me Musical Bouncer. It's got a cute giraffe pattern, which I like. Jungle stuff is always cute. But. My daughter instantly falls asleep in this bouncer every time she's in it. After my arms, it's her favorite place to be.

Get a mobile that has high contrast colors. I have one that is kind of ugly, but my babies have all been super interested in it very early on. Newborns see in black and white so high contrast is very important. Tiny Love makes great mobiles.

A Boppy pillow is a must. My daughter doesn't like her swing and her bouncer stays in the bathroom because that's where she goes when I pump (she can't nurse). So when she's out in the living room I put her in her Boppy pillow on the couch. She stays comfy and I don't have to worry about her rolling off the couch. My older kids love theirs (yes, we have one for each of them) and sit or lie on them while watching movies.

Get an assortment of pacifiers. There's no telling which style your baby will like so have different ones on hand to try. My kids have all gone through phases where they like one style for a while and then their preference changes.

Get as much sleep as you can! Take naps with your baby during the day. This is great for bonding and it keeps you refreshed. (I wish I could do this but three kids almost never sleep at the same time.)

Most of all, love your baby and trust your instincts. Don't be afraid, you'll have plenty of time to learn everything as you go. Give your baby lots of cuddle time. Once you have your baby just trust that as his or her primary caregiver you'll know what he or she needs.

kennethmgreen · February 2012

In 6 weeks, I'll be a new daddy, and I haven't a clue what I'm doing. I've got the essentials I suppose, crib, clothes, bottles, diapers, etc, so the baby will pretty much take care of itself, right? haha - Change it, feed it, let is sleep. Not much else to worry about?

I get to play stay-at-home-dad, so I'm sure I'll have a journey in store. This will be quite the change from daily gym trips and playing PC games though. Anything I really need to know? Am I in for any surprises? I need to know!!

My childcare potential is presumably sub-par from what's required. Uh oh.

Learn the mechanics. The emotional stuff will come. Make your life easier by getting some of the mechanics down. Good advice already posted about watching out for the pee. Are you using cloth diapers? Very different from disposable. Practice with the diapers you are going to be using. Put diapers on a doll of similar size/shape as a kid (surely you have a big teddy bear someone has given you - put it to use). Get good at that. If you are feeling really adventurous, see if a friend or family member would allow you to help change their kid.

Be prepared to love and care for your wife on little sleep. Don't complain. About anything. She just pushed a little human out of her. Nothing you can complain about will trump that.

Be prepared to talk about poop and nursing and nipples more than you thought was possible. And not in a snarky or sexy way, despite how funny poop and nipples may seem right now.

Be prepared to feel completely, utterly helpless and frustrated. Deal with it. You will not have the answers sometimes, and as long as your kid isn't in danger, he is likely going to be fine. Make sure you and your wife are partners. That doesn't mean you have to agree about everything. But try to make it a partnership. Start talking now about spanking, allowance, etc. You don't have to have everything planned in advance, but if you and the wife are fundamentally opposed on something, best to get it out in the open early so you can discuss. I highly recommend going with what she wants. Choose your battles and consider what's really important. I assume you've already decided about circumcision. Best not to put that one off.

Be prepared for a lot of crying. Babies cry a lot. They're noisy. Get ready for people to tell you their theories about babies crying and what to do about it. Just know they cry.

Be prepared for everyone you've ever known or care to know or ever met for the first time to give you advice about raising your child. Take what makes sense and ignore the rest. This includes my post and the others here.

Be prepared to hold this little person and get that tight-chested swooshing roller coaster light-headed sensation as new feelings come rushing over you. I suspect hours of PC gaming hasn't exactly broadened your emotional development. That's just a guess. You may be an emotional well. Either way, this is crazy new stuff. So get ready. It's a shock. It's good. All very good. But a shock nonetheless.

Ocarina · February 2012

Lucky! I would love to let my husband be stay at home dad while I work. Haha he would be a better nurturer then me I think.

I think you'll do fine especially since you can stay home. Read a lot!

WickedMouse · February 2012

Drink water, Eat your Veggies and move your body. Lead by example.

SofaKingRad · February 2012

Drink water, Eat your Veggies and move your body. Lead by example.

Oh and don't shake the baby!

JHoersten2 · February 2012

I appreciate all the replies. Luckily (or pathetically), I have plenty of experience with mmo games, thus sleep deprivation comes naturally. (Nothing like staying up till 3am trying to kill dragons) It's just man-handling a small baby that really scares me. I've told the wife that I'm not touching baby socks. I'm afraid that I'll peel back a toe or something trying to get them on. When my hand is half the size of his little body, I think my precision will suffer.

Crying I can deal with. I love the comment:

when a baby cries

1. feed, if not then
2. Change diaper, if not then
3. Burp, if not then
4. Sleepy, if not then
5. bored and wants your attention, if not then
6. check if Colic or fever (If colic, gripe water, If fever under 6 months= hospital, if fever over 8 months Tylenol, after 8 months if persists for 24 hrs go to hospital)

It sounds like it should be written in code as if the baby were a computer program. If he wants to cry and be angry when nothing is wrong, let him be angry I suppose. I think this may become the closest to an instruction manual that I can get.

I'm sure I'll figure it out. It's just odd to have someone to be responsible for after a decade of hitting the bar at a moments notice and living such a carefree life. How do you guys make the change from one lifestyle to the other?

Must take some heavy getting used to.

-J

WickedMouse · February 2012

I also forgot, don't get into any breast feeding debates!

onedayillbamilf · February 2012

In 6 weeks, I'll be a new daddy, and I haven't a clue what I'm doing. I've got the essentials I suppose, crib, clothes, bottles, diapers, etc, so the baby will pretty much take care of itself, right? haha - Change it, feed it, let is sleep. Not much else to worry about?

I get to play stay-at-home-dad, so I'm sure I'll have a journey in store. This will be quite the change from daily gym trips and playing PC games though. Anything I really need to know? Am I in for any surprises? I need to know!!

My childcare potential is presumably sub-par from what's required. Uh oh.

Learn the mechanics. The emotional stuff will come. Make your life easier by getting some of the mechanics down. Good advice already posted about watching out for the pee. Are you using cloth diapers? Very different from disposable. Practice with the diapers you are going to be using. Put diapers on a doll of similar size/shape as a kid (surely you have a big teddy bear someone has given you - put it to use). Get good at that. If you are feeling really adventurous, see if a friend or family member would allow you to help change their kid.

Be prepared to love and care for your wife on little sleep. Don't complain. About anything. She just pushed a little human out of her. Nothing you can complain about will trump that.

Be prepared to talk about poop and nursing and nipples more than you thought was possible. And not in a snarky or sexy way, despite how funny poop and nipples may seem right now.

Be prepared to feel completely, utterly helpless and frustrated. Deal with it. You will not have the answers sometimes, and as long as your kid isn't in danger, he is likely going to be fine. Make sure you and your wife are partners. That doesn't mean you have to agree about everything. But try to make it a partnership. Start talking now about spanking, allowance, etc. You don't have to have everything planned in advance, but if you and the wife are fundamentally opposed on something, best to get it out in the open early so you can discuss. I highly recommend going with what she wants. Choose your battles and consider what's really important. I assume you've already decided about circumcision. Best not to put that one off.

Be prepared for a lot of crying. Babies cry a lot. They're noisy. Get ready for people to tell you their theories about babies crying and what to do about it. Just know they cry.

Be prepared for everyone you've ever known or care to know or ever met for the first time to give you advice about raising your child. Take what makes sense and ignore the rest. This includes my post and the others here.

Be prepared to hold this little person and get that tight-chested swooshing roller coaster light-headed sensation as new feelings come rushing over you. I suspect hours of PC gaming hasn't exactly broadened your emotional development. That's just a guess. You may be an emotional well. Either way, this is crazy new stuff. So get ready. It's a shock. It's good. All very good. But a shock nonetheless.

I'm a little bit mad that you weren't there to offer this advice to my ex husband....he might not be my ex now if you would have been.

Nicolee_2014 · February 2012

You will do fine!

My OH is the bestest Dad in the whole world & he's NEVER been around kids being the youngest sibling etc. I can't believe how much of a natural he is. Sometimes it just flows.

Happy times :flowerforyou:

albinogorilla · February 2012

I have a 2 and 4 year old. They have never been in day care. I watch them all day, then my wife comes home, and i go to work. I am going from 7am to midnight, then i go to the gym and usually get home around 2am. Sleep from 2am to 7am, then repeat.

Good Luck!

Bah! New baby coming; what do I do??

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