Okay, I lost weight! Now what?

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LewisFishman
LewisFishman Posts: 32
in Motivation and Support
How would YOU feel if you lost a lot of weight? Really? I bet it would feel great. I KNOW it would--I lost 51 lb. so far, no longer use insulin, and no longer have to worry about easily finding clothes that fit. I get lots of compliments. Yes, it's sweet, BUT--

Has my confidence really skyrocketed? Am I a totally new person--bolder, more confident, a "role model" (whatever that is!),....I thought I'd feel a lot better about myself after having lost the weight. But now, as wonderful as that seems, there's a new challenge--I can't hide behind the excuse that "I'm out of shape--when I get healthier, then I'll have the courage to do new things and succeed". Okay, I lost the weight. Now what?

My weight, dangerous and sloppy as it was, served to insulate me from facing life's challenges. I can't do that anymore! How about you?

Replies

  • Scarlett_S
    Scarlett_S Posts: 467 Member
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    I understand what you are saying. I feel like the last thirty pounds I have lost have made a big difference for me. I DO feel confident and good and feel better about everything I am doing and trying to do. But I have fear sometimes - I can't hide behind the fat girl excuse for anything anymore.

    More than losing weight, working out and proving I can run and lift weights and do things with my body, has boosted my confidence.
  • yarmiah
    yarmiah Posts: 325 Member
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    Congratz!

    Healthy feels good, right??

    I know how you feel!

    As for your question "Now what?" -

    Keep challenging yourself! Try a 5K, try your hand at indoor rock climbing, or find a local rec league for a team sport.
    You have proved you can do anything you set your mind to, and now you have the body to achieve any goals!
  • tanigrrrrr
    tanigrrrrr Posts: 137 Member
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    Ah the constant delusion that people think "my life will automatically be amazing when im not fat anymore" fact is now that youve fought for that lower number on the scale, youve been brought back to a level playing ground of being a normal person, people wont look down on you for being fat, youre now assimilated into the crowd.

    Unfortunately youre just another person who isnt fat - you will need to set new goals about where you want to be and work just as hard as every other non overweight person to get there. It feels like being at the starting line all over again doesnt it?

    Sad but true
  • cloud2011
    cloud2011 Posts: 898 Member
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    Hmmm. I've thought about that a lot. I've lost 33 lbs and need to lose another 80 to 100. But I think even 50 or 60 would bring me to the point where I would have no excuses left for why I'm not pursuing my dream career, or traveling, or doing other things I've wanted to do. When I weighed a normal amount, I let life sort of lead me around, instead of proactively deciding what I want to do.

    So, may I ask you..what have you always wanted to do? My big two or three are sailing, travel, and starting my own business, or returning to school. I actually have my own small business but haven't done anything with it in the last couple of years. I've made a tiny amount of money (I have a job, too). I just can't seem to get it all together.
  • cloud2011
    cloud2011 Posts: 898 Member
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    Ah the constant delusion that people think "my life will automatically be amazing when im not fat anymore" fact is now that youve fought for that lower number on the scale, youve been brought back to a level playing ground of being a normal person, people wont look down on you for being fat, youre now assimilated into the crowd.

    Unfortunately youre just another person who isnt fat - you will need to set new goals about where you want to be and work just as hard as every other non overweight person to get there. It feels like being at the starting line all over again doesnt it?

    Sad but true

    I see what you're saying. Both of my kids are thin, and my son (adult in his twenties) gets a lot of attention for his looks. But, I can see that he still faces obstacles the rest of us face, even though I wrongly assume his life is easier because of his weight and his looks.

    And when I was thin, life was not easier for me. Besides I thought I was fat then (5'7" and 135), and there were people to convince me that I was!
  • marekdds
    marekdds Posts: 2,209 Member
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    I understand, lost 70lb myself. But we had the courage to do this, we will survive life's problems, Just approach it like we did the weight loss - one day at a time.
  • savdbygrac
    savdbygrac Posts: 38
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    I have this exact same issue in other areas of my life. Unknowingly I use to not finish things just because if I did then I'd be done and then what?! What's the answer? I don't know yet either! Something I'm working on. My point is that you're not alone! I guess like me you'll have to come up with more goals. It will be interesting to see what others have to say about this....
  • stevenleagle
    stevenleagle Posts: 293 Member
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    Lewis, first of all, well done. Please friend me, I am sure you will inspire me on my continued journey.

    Second of all, you are correct in what you say. You no longer can hide behind your weight/health as an excuse for other areas in your life that are lacking. I am sure you have extra energy now that you are thinner and are physically (and mentally) capable of tackling many challenges.

    Solution? Use your new found insight and all that discipline that you gained from losing weight to change other areas in your life that you feel need changing around! Start by writing down your goals NOW. Don't procrastinate. Write them down.

    Then PLAN for how you are going to achieve them and how you are going to measure your progress. Now obviously MFP won't be able to help with this (as per your weight loss journey) but I'm sure you will work it out ;)

    BTW don't by any means think I am perfect either. As I write this, I am procrastinating at work lol. But I do have a TO DO task with critical dates that I am working through - all in good time my friend :)

    On the other hand, I am struggling a little lately with the last 1/3 of the weight that I need to lose. Did I mention that I would like you to friend me?
  • hedgiie
    hedgiie Posts: 1,245 Member
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    for my case, i'm not really that fat but not that fit either. i've been into sports as a hobby, and i look forward to play again this summer.
    well, as for benefits, i just told that my performance is better recently, needless to say she had orgasms during the past sessions and i see it in her eyes how she appreciates the way I look.
    my son starts to eat healthy and becoming aware of nutritional eating

    well, i just lost 4 lbs have to lose 29 more... but with this benefits, i don't have to lose 29lbs to be graceful, i'm not really thinking the hiding part from the fat person..
  • MMarvelous
    MMarvelous Posts: 1,067 Member
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    I love all the responses thus far. I aspire to be where you are. I will add this you have made a great accomplishment and should guide or MENTOR others to do the same. You in return should seek a mentor or mentors to accomplish your next goals. You have definitely developed a successful strategy for losing weight. So why not use it in other areas of your life?
  • JoanWill
    JoanWill Posts: 217
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    Good valid question... now what?

    Now, I can handle stress better, I know how and where to channel my negative emotions. Now I know that there are better choices in life. And because I no longer have 'the" excuse, I feel like I can move mountains. :smile:

    Even those I mentioned is another set of challenges to face and conquer. Right now, I feel good about myself, I have a few more to lose but I have gained a little confidence. :flowerforyou:
  • LewisFishman
    LewisFishman Posts: 32
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    I mention this because I think that for many, excess weight serves some kind of psychological purpose. Hence phrases like "Building my walls", "can't let anyone come close", even "comfort food"! It's being exposed to life. The notion that okay, the party's over. Time to get on with doing that which I need to do.

    BTW I do have goals--professional, business, personal....Gotta start up my blog once again, learn a language, run some more (I already did a 5K in November), do some home improvements, and I know I'll come up with more cool things to do!

    Time to get off my butt, now that it's not so freakin' huge, and I have the energy!!
  • tangiesharp
    tangiesharp Posts: 315 Member
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    I love these response and I definitely need to hear them. I'm so close to my goal weight, but I still feel like "the fat girl." I still make room on the bus for people to sit next to me, but they no longer need the room. I am trying to set new physical goals like a triathlon. But I still need to work on changing the tapes running in my head.

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