I need help. My will power is slipping!!

Ok so, this might be a little long but please bear with me.

I used to be a very thin person as a little girl. My mother is naturally thin and so is my younger sister. As I got older (elementary school) I became "chubby." In elementary school this did not bother me at all. However, during 8th grade I just stopped eating lunch, I don't know why, I don't think I had a reason I just did. I did not feel hungry so I didn't eat. I was not very active, my only activity was gym class 2-3 times a week and the half-hour walks to and from school. I eventually stopped drinking the cup of milk my mother gave us as breakfast (when I could get away with it), and then I rarely ate dinner. I was basically starving myself. This continued on through 9th and part of 10th grade. I lost weight, though not as much as one would imagine. I got to the lowest I remember, 138 pounds.

In 10th grade I decided to join the tennis team. I slowly began eating again as I could not perform well with the few food I fed my body. My body got used to the food and I would still eat the same amount even when tennis was not in season, so I started gaining weight. Senior year, college application stress led on to more weight gain. This past summer was spent in college, and last fall i gained more than the freshman 15, though I lost some of it by joining MFP. When I went back home for winter break, the weight lost came back, plus more. I got to weight 181 pounds.

Since Junior year I have been tying to lose, though I admit my methods were not healthy. I tried starving myself again, but all that would do was cause me sharp abdominal pains. I started making myself throw up, which did not help either.

Now I want to do it the right way, not just count my calories but actually work out and eat better. Since the beginning of the semester (January 23) I have stopped drinking soda, and have tried to stay away from sugar. I started working out as well. I have PE (Yoga) twice a week for 55 minutes, and I go to a Zumba class on Thursdays for an hour. I tried at the beginning to work out at least 5 a week including PE and Zumba, but it has gotten considerably harder as the semester progresses.

The first week I lost 3 pounds, the second 4.5, the third I gained 2 pounds, and I have not weighted myself for this week. I am not too worried about the 2 pound gain since I felt 7.5 pounds lost in 2 weeks was not normal anyway. I have started to get off track though, drinking more sugary coffee drinks, as well as fatty foods that provide no nutrition whatsoever. I have anemia so I know eating better will greatly help me but I feel I am going back to my old habits. Please help me? I need tips, advice, anything. I want to get to my 135lbs goal, in a healthy way.

Also, I am a college student as mentioned before and walk around my huge campus a lot. What should my activity level be? Lightly active? Thanks!


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