Unwanted attention at work

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amyhoss
amyhoss Posts: 414 Member
in Chit-Chat
So, there is this guy at work who is not all there who quite obviously has a crush on me. He asks the people that I work closely with about me and he always smiles and waves at me when I walk by where he is working. He is really shy so he has never really said anything to me. He also knows that I am married and that I had a baby a little over a year ago. The problem is, I don't want to lead him on and I also don't want to come off like a *****. I usually act like whatever I am holding in my hand when I am walking by is the most interesting thing ever and I can't look up to acknowledge him. It's not a huge problem because, like I said, he doesn't even talk to me. I just feel uncomfortable when I have to walk past his workstation. Any advice on this?

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  • Sl1ghtly
    Sl1ghtly Posts: 855 Member
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    I usually flip the bird, or curse people who are friendly to me. Nothing stops that **** faster.
  • cekeys
    cekeys Posts: 397 Member
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    Ok, the best thing I can tell you is IGNORE him. Don't look his way, try to just stay focused on your work and head down. If he sees you and waves, pick up the phone like it just rang. The best thing to do in these situations is to not feed the bears. He'll eventually get the hint.
  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
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    HR
  • christine24t
    christine24t Posts: 6,063 Member
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    I guess if it was me, I would just smile and act like he is like everyone else. Until he does something (who knows if he even would) I wouldn't single him out. You could also make it a point to bring up your husband and child if he ever talks to you.
  • La_Amazona
    La_Amazona Posts: 4,855 Member
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    scratch your crotch with a vengeance when you know he's watching..

    seriously, I have done this during unwanted attention and the men always get a WTF look on their face. hilarious!
  • SinIsIn
    SinIsIn Posts: 1,865 Member
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    I don't really see how this is unwanted attention at work since he's never even talked to you! LOL

    But I'd just ignore it and treat him like everyone else.
  • UponThisRock
    UponThisRock Posts: 4,522 Member
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    He also knows that I am married and that I had a baby a little over a year ago. The problem is, I don't want to lead him on and I also don't want to come off like a *****.

    I'd bet that if you asked your husband about this, his advice would be for you to come off like a *****.
  • cadams0715
    cadams0715 Posts: 43
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    I would treat him normally and if he starts talking to you bring up your husband and child in conversation. If he asks you out, I would nicely say "no thank you, I have a husband" If he is not quite there, I don't think he will change his mind until he finds another crush.
  • LittleMissNerdy
    LittleMissNerdy Posts: 792 Member
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    If he thinks someone just being nice to him is "leading him on" he's got some issues. You have to remember you guys work together which means you don't want things to get even more awkward. :(
  • fakeplastictree
    fakeplastictree Posts: 836 Member
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    I'd say don't worry about it unless he is licking his lips at you when you walk by. He may just be awkward.
  • onedayillbamilf
    onedayillbamilf Posts: 662 Member
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    HR

    She said he doesn't even talk to her. I didn't know I could report people to HR for looking in my direction. I work at a front desk, I better get off here. I have a lot of reporting to do.
  • LittleMissNerdy
    LittleMissNerdy Posts: 792 Member
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    HR should only be used for serious issues, not because someone has a schoolboy crush. Now, if he starts harassing her or something, that's another thing. But just looking at her?
  • Bronx_Montgomery
    Bronx_Montgomery Posts: 2,287 Member
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    scratch your crotch with a vengeance when you know he's watching..

    seriously, I have done this during unwanted attention and the men always get a WTF look on their face. hilarious!

    Damn...I saw you do that in my direction and just thought it was an invitation to Poon town
  • La_Amazona
    La_Amazona Posts: 4,855 Member
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    scratch your crotch with a vengeance when you know he's watching..

    seriously, I have done this during unwanted attention and the men always get a WTF look on their face. hilarious!

    Damn...I saw you do that in my direction and just thought it was an invitation to Poon town

    eww that'd be an infested poon town. :sick:
  • AllanMisner
    AllanMisner Posts: 4,140 Member
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    Like another poster said, "Don't feed the bears." If he's too shy to talk to you, he'll likely keep his crush about as long as it takes him to see another girl in the office he likes.

    I guess it would be better if every body in the office thought you were a troll. Then you wouldn't have these pesky admirers. :tongue:
  • CountryBoy65
    CountryBoy65 Posts: 908 Member
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    So, there is this guy at work who is not all there who quite obviously has a crush on me. He asks the people that I work closely with about me and he always smiles and waves at me when I walk by where he is working. He is really shy so he has never really said anything to me. He also knows that I am married and that I had a baby a little over a year ago. The problem is, I don't want to lead him on and I also don't want to come off like a *****. I usually act like whatever I am holding in my hand when I am walking by is the most interesting thing ever and I can't look up to acknowledge him. It's not a huge problem because, like I said, he doesn't even talk to me. I just feel uncomfortable when I have to walk past his workstation. Any advice on this?

    When you say he "is not all there" do you literally mean that he has some kind of issue? Often times, people with certain conditions that makes them seem a little off, or slow, are naturally friendly and crave attention. I know several people like this from work and church. they are very often outgoing, overly friendly, and wave and shyly smile...hoping for a nice word or a return of the smile.....not sure if that is this guys problem,or if it is nothing like this at all......But if he has not approached you, tried to talk to you, or been seen stalking you, I don't think you need to do anything.
  • LiviLou2011
    LiviLou2011 Posts: 437 Member
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    lmfao
  • mrlazy1967
    mrlazy1967 Posts: 285 Member
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    Give the guy a break, he's not exactly stalking you is he?
  • Z_I_L_L_A
    Z_I_L_L_A Posts: 2,399 Member
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    He smiles and waves, and how is this a bad thing again.?So someone being nice is being taken the wrong way maybe? Do need to do a background check or something because he is shy and weird? Or maybe he is like the M&M commercial where the guy has the "hungry eyes" stare, or does he send you notes saying "it puts the lotion on her". Okay honestly he sounds like a shy harmless guy to me, just treat him like other employees. If you are bigger than him tell him you'll kick his @zz. lol

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