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How to you take compliments?

alorick
alorick Posts: 194
edited November 2024 in Motivation and Support
Since starting my journey, I've only lost 10 pounds and it's been almost 2 weeks since I've lost anything. But, I've lost 2 inches from my hips and 4.5 from my waist. I've had many people say, "OMG, your waist is so small!" I say, "Thank you. I've been working hard." But really, I just want to say, "Huh? Are you blind? My waist could be a lot smaller, I have the arms and shoulders of a linebacker, and you can put knick knacks on my huge shelf of an *kitten*!"

So, how do you learn to accept compliments gracefully without thinking about how bad your body still is? Or am I just a cynical b!tch who needs to suck it up and be happy with what I've accomplished so far?

Replies

  • Rocking_Robin
    Rocking_Robin Posts: 238 Member
    I struggle with compliments too....but I dont have a thought like yours in my head...hehe. I have issues seeing my own successes...when I started MFP a year ago I was in size 22 and now I am a 16, I am so proud but I dont know why I dont believe it when people give me a compliment...my hubby says I have spent my life taking care of people and I still do ( my hubby is disabled) so maybe even though I am working on putting myself first, I am just not there yet....so I am hoping when my confidence continues to grow it will also help me to accept a compliment. Congrats on your success!!!
  • pornstarzombie
    pornstarzombie Posts: 297
    I dont' take them well, I don't really know what to say. I usually just stammer a "thanks"
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,462 Member
    I can take compliments graciously from some people and not so graciously from others.

    Something about the way they say it, or the fact that some people are fake complimenters.
  • Dilfster
    Dilfster Posts: 416 Member
    yep. just a simple thanks from me. sometimes i probably come off rude for saying so little in return.
  • Oliviamarie05
    Oliviamarie05 Posts: 528 Member
    "Huh? Are you blind? My waist could be a lot smaller, I have the arms and shoulders of a linebacker, and you can put knick knacks on my huge shelf of an *kitten*!"

    This made laugh so hard I startled my co-workers!! Honestly, I have the same issues. Whenever my fiance tells me he can see a difference or that he thinks I'm beautiful, I grab a handful of my stomach and go "Really? Am I the only one seeing the jiggle when I wiggle let alone walk? How could you find the flab attractive?"

    When a compliment comes my way I just say thanks and try not to do the self-depricating bashing that usually follows. I tend to be the most cruel person to myself and my esteem.
  • aj_gettingfit
    aj_gettingfit Posts: 257
    I usually have a hard time taking them as well. I've learned over my 2 yr WLJ to just say thank you. If they keep on talking about my WL then I'll say something like eating right and working out is how I did it. It depends on who I'm talking to though.
  • _Christine_
    _Christine_ Posts: 1,385 Member
    I crack jokes.

    Course I do that in just about every situation. Many are inappropriate... but when I just say, "Thank You" I start to laugh and feel self-conscience.

    Yep, I'll stick with my lame jokes
  • UponThisRock
    UponThisRock Posts: 4,519 Member
    They make me pretty uncomfortable. I just say "thanks" and change the subject.
  • ged630
    ged630 Posts: 145 Member
    This makes me VERY uncomfortable. I typically say "Ok, Thanks" But in my head I am saying I have a LONG way to go yet.

    I think I am getting better but it is really hard.
  • GeneveSparkles
    GeneveSparkles Posts: 283 Member
    Say thanks and internalize the fact that the hard work you're putting in is paying off. You might not be at your final goal but it's a long journey and knowing someone notices the little differences along the way can be very motivatiing. Someone noticed my little weight loss (8 lbs) this week and it cheesed me out. I said, like you, "thank you I've been working hard," but the compliment kind of made my day. What we're all doing takes a lot of hard work, dedication, motivation and will power, we should be proud of every inch and every pound that we overcome!!!
  • goodfido
    goodfido Posts: 127 Member
    Well first if people say I look really good, I wonder what the heck I looked like before....but after I get past that....

    I try and say thanks and then talk about it. The more I talk about it, the more it keeps me focused and on a couple of occasions I've had others start a weight loss program of their own. It makes me feel good to know that I can inspire others occasionally.
  • tashaa1992
    tashaa1992 Posts: 658 Member
    I laugh at it then just say thanks. I don't trust anyone, I feel ugly and massive all the time soin my opinion, they're just lying to me. I believe everyone has an ulterior motive, what it could be I don't know though.
    It makes me feel really uncomfortable.
  • Kenzietea2
    Kenzietea2 Posts: 1,132 Member
    Its hard for me to take them too, but I just say 'thank you' (usually blush) and move away from the subject. I always feel like I am being lied to, which is so silly and I think we all just need to get over it and accept that others have noticed.
  • CoryIda
    CoryIda Posts: 7,870 Member
    Even though I've shed an entire person worth of weight, I still have a hard time believing it when people compliment me. I think they either need glasses or are just trying to be nice because, well, obviously I look better than I did before.

    That being said, I'm learning. When you throw a compliment back at someone (as in, telling them they're blind or just being nice or just saying that they're wrong), you are hurting yourself and them.
    They wanted to commend you on something, and you aren't letting them.

    With that realization, I've slowly been learning to just say thank you, and then I store that compliment in a little mental filing cabinet to be taken out on days when I'm suffering from particularly crappy self-esteem (which still happens regularly - overcoming 27 years of being told you're unattractive takes more than a month or two of being told otherwise).
  • treetop57
    treetop57 Posts: 1,578 Member
    So, how do you learn to accept compliments gracefully without thinking about how bad your body still is?

    Like any other skill, we learn to do it by practice, practice, practice. "Thank you. I've been working hard" is perfect practice!
  • quietlywinning
    quietlywinning Posts: 889 Member
    Evidently, I don't take compliments very well. My small daughter, when told she had a pretty name, sighed loudly, donned a bored voice, and said, "Oh, thanks. I've had it a LOOOOONG time."

    Yeah Mom.......learn to say "thank you".
  • fteale
    fteale Posts: 5,310 Member
    I stick my tongue out and make a face.
  • dendra7
    dendra7 Posts: 113 Member
    I've taken to performing a full body spin (like a runway model), flipping my hair back, giving a quick wink and a "Thank you". If you can do that, a simple Thank you, I've been working hard will be much easier.
  • ramonasowner
    ramonasowner Posts: 136 Member
    I stick my tongue out and make a face.

    this
  • lmarshel
    lmarshel Posts: 674 Member
    So, how do you learn to accept compliments gracefully without thinking about how bad your body still is?

    Like any other skill, we learn to do it by practice, practice, practice. "Thank you. I've been working hard" is perfect practice!

    This is a brilliant observation! I try to always say a heart-felt thank you whenever someone gives me a compliment, regardless of how I feel about what they say. Most people are very sincere, and I feel you need to acknowledge that. It's just like if someone compliments your outfit or your shoes, just give them a big smile and say thanks...no additional comments necessary.
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