does anybody understand?

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when i first made this account, i weighed 215 lbs. over a year, i gained about an extra 15. now i'm back to 215 lbs. my whole problem has changed because when i first made this account, i had an eating problem because i ate so much. now, i have an eating problem becuase i dont eat much anymore. idk if its depression, but whenever i eat anything, i feel fat and gross. for instance, today i ate nothing for breakfast, at 2 cookies at school for lunch (usually i dont eat there), and i had a glass of water an hour ago. this all started about 3 weeks ago but my eating habits started this week. i dont want to be anorexic, but whenever i eat, i feel hideous. does anybody understand? :cry:

Replies

  • Aerohead21
    Aerohead21 Posts: 333 Member
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    Sometimes I stress out about food because I worry so much about failing but I try to make sure I eat enough every day. I think you should talk with someone professional about this is you can't make yourself eat. If you take care of it early on it will be easier to manage.
  • 4everMyself
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    thx. i will try that. :wink:
  • ejohndrow
    ejohndrow Posts: 1,399 Member
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    For me the things I eat really affect how I feel. If I eat more processed, low nutrient, high fat, high sodium foods-I feel terrible, and I feel like I look terrible. I could weigh the same, however, but eat something like grilled fish and vegetables-something with plenty of nutrients and spend at least an hour at the gym and feel amazing.

    Try not to limit yourself on calories by eat small amounts of processed foods, see if you can start incorporating more unprocessed meats and produce into your diet. This all helps me feel better when I feel down about myself.
  • lorim77
    lorim77 Posts: 63 Member
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    Overeating and undereating are both no good. Honey, you need to get yourself some help before you make yourself really ill. Don't let food control your life. Go talk to your Guideance Counselor- TODAY! They can help you or get you set up with someone who can.
    By the way- I'm really proud of you for admitting that you have a problem. That takes a lot of courage. The net step is to do something about it. Keep us updated. We are all here to support you!!
  • Zichu
    Zichu Posts: 542 Member
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    You really should be eating 3 or more healthy meals a day and drink plenty of water.

    I checked what you ate yesterday and it's just not enough. There is no way you are eating little to nothing and not losing anything because I've done it once years ago and I got really skinny, but I didn't see it as that. I actually ate like 1 meal a day. I don't know how much I lost, but I could tell I lost weight and my family could tell I lost weight.

    I managed to start eating properly, 3 meals a day, I obviously put on the weight again, but I didn't feel as bad about myself. When I left school I started overeating a bit, I didn't gain like a of weight, but I know I gained some because I wasn't really moving about much and I was eating unhealthy food.

    I knew it wasn't healthy for me, I started going jogging, I ate 3 meals a day with snacks in between. I drank more water, etc. I was also skipping in the week. Lifting some weights, push ups, sit ups, bench dips, etc. I went from 145lb to 128lb. Went on holiday and was in the pool for 2 hours a day and we walked everywhere and only sat down for meals. I didn't exactly stick to my healthy meal plan during that week, but I managed to lose another 7lb and was 121lb and felt great again.

    Then later last year I felt unhappy about my life, myself, etc. Ate a bit more, stopped jogging and gained 6lb. I don't know how, but I got out of it and saw that life really isn't all that bad and worked it out. I feel more confident than I did before, it was like a wake up call, I had seen life in a different light and felt great. I'm joined this site, started cycling, jogging and just about to start a bit of muscle building to burn that excess fat off.


    I know it's hard getting out of a situation when you feel depressed and things don't go right which makes it all add up, you overeat or under eat and become unhealthy and it makes you even more depressed because you are not getting the correct vitamins, minerals and the goodness food can bring to you when you are feeling down. I do feel terrible when I eat something unhealthy, but when I have had good days and I check my diary I do feel good about myself.
  • ejohndrow
    ejohndrow Posts: 1,399 Member
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    Overeating and undereating are both no good. Honey, you need to get yourself some help before you make yourself really ill. Don't let food control your life. Go talk to your Guideance Counselor- TODAY! They can help you or get you set up with someone who can.
    By the way- I'm really proud of you for admitting that you have a problem. That takes a lot of courage. The net step is to do something about it. Keep us updated. We are all here to support you!!
    And yes, I agree with this as well, nip this in the bud before it affects your health-both mentally and physically.
  • donna_glasgow
    donna_glasgow Posts: 869 Member
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    I can sympathise with this

    When I was at my biggest I wouldn't eat in public, I felt that people were looking at me and judging me, I however never felt like that at home, I have never been a "big" eater but I do tend to eat the wrong foods, I love dairy products, cheese being one of my major downfalls. Why dont you try keeping fruit in the house and picking at that during the day. you shouldn't feel bad about eating especially if its an apple or grapes etc and as a bonus they taste good .

    good luck :)
  • mixedfeelings
    mixedfeelings Posts: 904 Member
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    I understand how you feel, I put on a lot of weight by under eating for most days and overeating by just a slight amount on others. I found it hard to eat more than 700 calories in the week. Nip this in the bud, the fact that you can open up about it is great. Try and maintain a healthy balanced day, stick to the calories you should, but don't skip meals. If you feel this isn't something you can cope with and that your on a slippery slope then speak to a professional.
  • anulle2009
    anulle2009 Posts: 580 Member
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    I am a horrible stress eater.. There are days I go over board and there are days I don't eat.Normally weekends I don't eat much. Maybe you should talk to a doctor?? I have been having depression issues and decided to make the step to do talk to my doctor.
  • Becky_Boodle
    Becky_Boodle Posts: 253 Member
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    I would try eating raw fruits and veggies as snacks instead of cookies it might make you feel better about what you're eating...maybe you're feeling "gross" about eating because of what you're eating...

    I was 215 at my biggest and after changing what I was eating and exercising more I was able to lose 70 lbs...feel free to add me as a friend and I will help you in any way I can :)
  • rinnismom
    rinnismom Posts: 190
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    i agree. you should talk with someone about it. you're not as abnormal as you think, believe me. i battled anorexia in school. want to know why? i felt like a pig when i ate. that was between the ages of 15-18. i still battle with myself to eat enough, well, i did. since being on mfp, i've gotten to understanding better on how my food intake helps and hurts my body. (i promise i'm getting to the point)

    on the days that my depression or anxiety is so debilitating i can't leave the bed, i can't force myself to eat until my stomach says, "hey dummy, you've usually fed me TWICE by now, what's up?" my appetite gets really pissed at me, ya know, i have to make myself be active. i can't do it every day, but i try. if i keep my activity level up, then my hunger will be something that i can't ignore - which is good. it needs to be so forceful that i can't ignore it. it keeps me grounded and it keeps me listening to my body and giving it what it needs.

    i hate to preach about the things everyone throws your way cause i'm sure you're sick of listening to it all. i suffered this for years and, if it weren't for a little self-realization and a lot of research (cause i was never brave enough for counseling), i don't know the state i would be in now. it has taken this site and it's been about 9 months now since i've been here. i'm 29, you understand. it has taken me 14 years to get a handle on my eating disorder. i'm overweight. i'm not some skinny twig that has just vomited or drank nothing but diet soda to stay alive (though i did go through that phase).

    until you can wrangle the eating disorder beast, take supplements. water, supplements, and fish oil help keep your body healthier. (everyone has their own cocoction - this is just mine) keep the nutrients coming into your body. something that can and has helped me deal with the "i can't believe that i just ate that," or the, "i can't believe that i just ate ALL of that" issue is i'll eat healthy foods. i make myself eat fruits instead of snack cakes. i make myself take in grains. i make myself measure out how much. you don't have to go my route and use measuring cups or scales, but even if you just say, "i'm eating cereal. i won't overfill the bowl. i won't go back for seconds. i will always use this (smaller) bowl to keep my portion size lower." it all helps. i promise. whenever i measure out my food, i think, "wow, that's so much food!' but when i log it on here, it's never quite as bad as it seems in my head.

    i've always loved eating healthy. i feel better about myself when i do. my biggest cringe factor was i'd do well and then the cravings would start or i would be too busy to make my lunch and i would fall off the wagon. yes, eating disorders are no different than substance or alcohol abuse. i have just learned... well, i've learned so much..... but i've learned, to get through a craving, eat what you're craving. not two candy bars or not two slices of cake; 1 will suffice. i've learned that the more i pack this healthy **** into my body, the more i want it. i crave the good foods. i am never satisfied if i eat out somewhere. i used to think that fast-food was sooo good. now i think, "i can't believe i wasted my money on this crap!"

    sorry to have stretched this out so far, but talking about it and sharing with you my plight is the best thing that i can offer. the truth is best. i don't like when people push the same old litany of procedure and protocol about matters like this. everyone is different. i have went through this same thing you're battling over.
  • 4everMyself
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    thanks for understanding. i wanna thank everone for replying to my post because i was worried that no one would respond. im going to see the school counciler on monday. you have no idea how loved i feel right now because of you guys :heart:
  • Loko_Ino
    Loko_Ino Posts: 544 Member
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    Glad to see you are going to see the school counselor. Props to you for trying to understand whats going on.
    Wish you all the best.
  • luvlyjanny
    luvlyjanny Posts: 85 Member
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    my advice is definitely see somebody quick before that mindset takes over!! i started feeling like that last august and since then its all gone downhill for me, ive been to dieticians and have just been referred to a therapist wont give details but its no fun and its a daily struggle!!! please please get it sorted out before you get to the point i am at!!
  • Dayna154
    Dayna154 Posts: 910 Member
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    Im glad to see that you are going to seek some help. This group here at MFP are wonderful I see so many times people come to support others.
    Someday you can be the person everyone is a little envious of for having worked so hard to finally be at their goal..
    Dont give up on yourself.. Fight you deserve it and all of us will cheer you on in the process..
  • JMPDancer
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    I get it! I've been in therapy on and off for the last 8 years to deal with my eating disorders and this was exactly how I felt. Even eating regular amounts was overwhelming. I definately would agree that you should find yourself a good councillor that you trust. Mine told me that I needed to think of food as my medicine. Since drugs, laxitives etc weren't part of my ED this worked. You can't take more than you need and you can't have less than you need in order to stay healthy. It's not a perfect solution, but it was a good place to start from and sometimes it helps me through the rough spots that I'm having still. Good luck! Hang in there!:smile:
  • 2hmom
    2hmom Posts: 241 Member
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    I care,too. I think once you start eating the calories you need,you will feel better. You take care and enjoy your weekend. Please,keep us posted!
  • Magicalmomma
    Magicalmomma Posts: 14 Member
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    I understand your problem. I am an emotional eater and I know my weight is because of it. I have to agree with the other posts though, you do not seem to be eating enough. It sounds like you are in school? If so, I know that 3 healthy meals might be difficult to do, but it is really essential. Try fruit or veggies instead of cookies. LOTS and LOTS of water.

    I also have a diagnosis of depression and it sounds like you may have some too (sorry, not trying to be judgmental). Please find someone to talk to.

    You can also add me as a friend. I will give you encouragement and hopefully we can continue our weight loss journey together.

    Diane :heart:

    PS: Right now my emotions are in full swing and I am craving chocolate. Fat free, sugar free pudding here I come :blushing:
  • DaughterOfTheMostHighKing
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    thanks for understanding. i wanna thank everone for replying to my post because i was worried that no one would respond. im going to see the school counciler on monday. you have no idea how loved i feel right now because of you guys :heart:

    good decision! you're half way to solving the problem! I'm proud of you making that decision! You are worth it!