The RARE occasion when it is good to be fat.

papa3x
papa3x Posts: 286
edited November 12 in Chit-Chat
OK, I know /expect some people will take offense to this, but regarding this topic, I couldn't care less.

I absolutely hate telemarketers; I think it should be illegal, PERIOD. But worse than that are the people who come to your door trying to convert you into their religion. So, today, I saw two women walking the neighborhood, and I knew that was what they were doing as their car was parked on the street and it had religious stuff all over it.

So when they came to my door, I took off my shirt, revealing my - albeit smaller - man boobs before opening the door. And revealing my hairy stomach and zipper scar....

As they started to get into their "deal", I started to rub my nipples..... Strangely enough one of the women claimed that they had to go, as she just got a text message.... LOL.
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Replies

  • sillygoose1977
    sillygoose1977 Posts: 2,151 Member
    :drinker:
  • EmCarroll1990
    EmCarroll1990 Posts: 2,832 Member
    OMG, you are amazing. Just had to cover my laughing as coughing.
  • BAMFMeredith
    BAMFMeredith Posts: 2,810 Member
    OMG that is amazing. You sir, are my hero for the day.


    When those people would come to our door growing up my dad would start arguing with them throwing in random facts from television shows like Star Trek, and then say "I worship the devil anyway, but thanks!"

    This was particularly funny because he was a super devout Catholic.
  • TheNewDoug
    TheNewDoug Posts: 56
    Fat people are also much harder to kidnap.
  • BaconMD
    BaconMD Posts: 1,165 Member
    I am a Christian, and I thought this was hilarious! Gives me ideas, in fact.
  • SnakeDarling
    SnakeDarling Posts: 352 Member
    I LOVE this.

    I usually just shoot them the face that JennaMarbles taught me :p
  • Mandykinz2008
    Mandykinz2008 Posts: 292 Member
    bahahaHAHAHAHAHA. I literally just burst out laughing in my cubicle..my cube-mates were like "WTH" lol

    You are my hero.
  • TopazCarey
    TopazCarey Posts: 263
    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • svanhoecke
    svanhoecke Posts: 266
    I LOVE this.

    I usually just shoot them the face that JennaMarbles taught me :p

    This ^^^ :laugh:
  • PinkEarthMama
    PinkEarthMama Posts: 987 Member
    I used to tell telemarketers that my parents were having $e><
  • rextcat
    rextcat Posts: 1,408 Member
    i just use a cat skull rattle, and deathmetal....but yeah half naked works to:tongue:
  • 412HeavyLifter
    412HeavyLifter Posts: 170 Member
    lmfao
  • jennifer52484
    jennifer52484 Posts: 888 Member
    LOL I usually hide from people if possible. but that is friggen hilarious;) great job haha
  • SassyCalyGirl
    SassyCalyGirl Posts: 1,932 Member
    don't you have the capability of just telling them you are "not interested"? This is what is wrong with the world today-people prefer to be rude rather than honest. But like you said-you could care less and that's the problem!
  • inetgirl
    inetgirl Posts: 174 Member
    LOL!! I didn't think people went door to door anymore. Had one the other day it was for a company giving away "free" carpet cleaning. Yeah, that didn't happen.
  • aquasw16
    aquasw16 Posts: 342 Member
    BAHAHAHA. i know someone who answered the door with just a towel on one day. They never came back.
  • Mrswheels01
    Mrswheels01 Posts: 201 Member
    :laugh: :laugh:
  • aquasw16
    aquasw16 Posts: 342 Member
    because even if you say you arent interested, THEY STILL COME BACK!
  • megmo_7
    megmo_7 Posts: 98 Member
    That is absolutely hilarious! I do not think us women could pull that off though. Maybe if a guy came to the door and we started rubbing our stomach like Homer Simpson... Hmm
  • ShannanRenae
    ShannanRenae Posts: 130
    :laugh: :sad: :laugh: :sad: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :sad: :laugh: TOO FUNNY!!!!!!!!
  • TanyaCurtis
    TanyaCurtis Posts: 630
    LOL ok, u are out of it!!!
  • papa3x
    papa3x Posts: 286
    because even if you say you arent interested, THEY STILL COME BACK!

    They do come back..... every 3 months.
  • Skeemer118
    Skeemer118 Posts: 397 Member
    :heart: :drinker: :happy: :heart:
  • Chagama
    Chagama Posts: 543 Member
    Very funny. Congratulations on your cleverness!
  • Skeemer118
    Skeemer118 Posts: 397 Member
    don't you have the capability of just telling them you are "not interested"? This is what is wrong with the world today-people prefer to be rude rather than honest. But like you said-you could care less and that's the problem!

    Someone needs some chocolate...FAST. :happy:
  • ArtsyLaurie
    ArtsyLaurie Posts: 39 Member
    That's also a good reason to learn exotic languages... start reciting Klingon to the telemarketer/missionaries/whoever, they ought to either give up fairly quickly or start up a trekkie conversation.
  • Dayna154
    Dayna154 Posts: 910 Member
    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • chaniray
    chaniray Posts: 83 Member
    lol
  • candykay0605
    candykay0605 Posts: 1,019 Member
    my dad would invite them in for a glass of water cook them a meal, invite them back the next day a the next and then he would start telling his theories of the beggining of time and the end of the world ect. he never gave them the opprotunity to actually talk about their religion BUT they would always come back each year! I think it was because of how nice he was and his CRAZY stories :) He just liked to come up with stuff to tell
  • _Bob_
    _Bob_ Posts: 1,487 Member
    too funny. I was one of those missionaries once way back in the day. and I thought it was awesome when people would pull stuff like this. I'm not pushy at all so a simple no thanks was good for me but some don't get the hint. and in sales if they don't want it you're just doing them a disservice convincing them that they do.
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