My story thus far. Advice please? Opinions? Encouragement?

Woooolywool
Woooolywool Posts: 136 Member
edited November 12 in Health and Weight Loss
Well, I'm 5ft 5, 18 years old, I weigh 137lbs, and of course am a female. And I've been using mfp for just under a month. It suggested me to have a minimum intake of 1,200kcals daily to lose 1 1/2 lbs a week. Now, when I first begun this healthier approach to my diet, (no longer touching anything processed, or anything really linked to 'junk' food) I'd lost 3lbs without really having to try.

BUT, since I've started mfp, I've realised that I even struggle to reach an intake of 1,200 calories a day...even when I exercise! I've been going to the gym for about a month now, for 6 days a week, 30-80 minutes at a time doing cardio, burning on average 200-450 calories each time (I will start to incorporate strength training next week also)...and apart from the fact that my jeans need pulling up every few minutes, I haven't actually lost any weight.

And then, my friend who'd started her weight loss journey at basically the same time as me, and who became aware of mfp 'cause I'd told her about it, burns so much more at the gym (600+ kcals) for the same length of time as me, has lost 1 stone in just the one month. I've lost 3lbs. And she wasn't big or anything to begin with. If anything she was smaller than me.

And the problem is that if I do start to plan my meals like her, and start to REALLY kick things up a notch at the gym, I could be triggered back in to the bulimia I went through for six months last year (I'd lost 3 stone last year; 42lbs). I'm in university, and it really is THE biggest struggle trying to fit in going to the gym, especially when our final major project is starting in a week or so.

I KNOW I need to keep concentrating on my HEALTH, and not on losing weight; if I make the slightest of mistakes, or slip up, then I could revert back to that disordered thinking. It's just so difficult for me now when my friend, this girl who's one of my flatmates comes in announcing of her weight loss, and her boyfriend, another of my flatmates has these big muscles, drinks protein shakes, and goes weight training almost daily tells me I'm not doing things the same as her, and that's why I'm not seeing results, and that I should work harder, and do this, and do that, and that I'm having too much peanut butter.

I feel like crying. BUT I know that if I did, then that would be 'giving in', and I need to be strong, and positive, and confident with myself to better my HEALTH. NOT the number on the scale.


SO, opinions? ADVICE? Help please, just shed some light on the matter. AM I not eating enough?

Thank you. x

Replies

  • mom2jac
    mom2jac Posts: 24 Member
    Stay the course. Slow and steady wins the race. Eat healthy & exercise--- everybody loses at a different rate.
  • skinnieminniemouse
    skinnieminniemouse Posts: 118
    The weight part doesn't matter in my opinion, you can lose like 5 inches bit stay the same weight, it is very deceiving! You shouldn't compare yourself to her, even though it's hard. You need to go at your pace, you are burning a good amount, make sure you hit 1200 cals, as they are essential. You will see amazing results, and not only will you be slimmer, you will be more toned and fitter. You can do this, it takes time for the results to show, be patient and positive.
  • bbriscoe13
    bbriscoe13 Posts: 175 Member
    My husband is dieting with me and he loses weight so easily. He has lost about 15 pounds in the time that it has taken me to lose 8, and it is discouraging for me. I am very proud of him and I feel bad for getting upset, but I still do. I just have to remember everyone's body is different. You just have to not compare yourself to her, and if she is being discoraging than you should try not to talk to her about weight loss things. Having support is a huge help when trying to lose weight. And remember 137 at 5'5 is really not overweight so it will take a little longer to lose it because you don't have much to lose. :) Good luck, and don't be too hard on yourself!
  • ambitious01
    ambitious01 Posts: 209 Member
    Have you taken any measurements to see what your progress is? I wouldn't take too much stock in your friends success seems how our metabolisms function differently. Good luck and keep your head up!!
  • Onesnap
    Onesnap Posts: 2,819 Member
    I have a success story on my wall (what works for me on MFP) since we're friends check it out. It's on the left side.

    Eat clean, NET your calories. Log every workout, every bite.

    Know your farmer. Visit a farmer's market. There's even markets year round now in some states. :) Basically if you try new things you'll never get bored and never have trouble eating all of your calories (and you'll never be hungry).
  • erickirb
    erickirb Posts: 12,294 Member
    3 pounds in a month is a much healthier loss rate then a full stone (unless she is morbidly obese). As you are in the healthy MI range your weekly goal should be to lose no more than 1lb/week, I would suggest 0.5lbs if you have less than 15lbs to lose. This will give you more calories to eat, and it is best to eat them as if you do not eat enough while in a caloric deficit a large % of weight loss will be from lean muscle, not fat.
  • futuresize8
    futuresize8 Posts: 476 Member
    You'll get all the encouragement you need on MFP! I'm glad you posted.

    You're making good decisions by incorporating exercise, but your past struggles with bulimia have me hoping that you are being kind to your body and eating enough to support that exercise.

    Try to avoid comparing yourself with anyone else, even though it's difficult. Our bodies are all different. I know from experience that I have to work harder than the average person not only to lose, but to maintain.

    If you need support, add me as a friend if you like!
  • GalaxyDuck
    GalaxyDuck Posts: 406 Member
    I didn't read the other posts, just yours so I apologize if this has been said already. At 137 lbs and your height, you don't really have a WHOLE lot of weight to loose. A goal of losing 1.5 lbs/week is too high for someone who's not looking to shed 30-40 + lbs. I would try re-adjusting your goals to 0.5 lb/week. I know, I know, you want to loose weight faster. But you also want to be HEALTHY right? That will be a much healthier rate for someone of your size to lose at. That's the rate I aimed for for my last 10-15 lbs. When you're already so close to a healthy weight range, your body just doesn't want to give up 1-2 lbs/week!

    By adjusting your goals, you'll also probably find it ups your calories. Make sure to eat them all! It might seem to make sense that eating fewer calories will help you shed weight faster, but it's just not always the case.
  • brearune
    brearune Posts: 26
    I know how you feel - I've lost 13 lbs according to the scale, but I fit the exact same, but like you, just pull my pants up more lol. And I have a friend who went down 2 dress sizes when she lost 11 lbs and I eat healthy while she doesn't :/ it is tough, but you can do it, like the others said dont compare, she'll probably plateau sooner anyway.... just try to focus on you and being good to your body :)
  • TheYankeeBelle
    TheYankeeBelle Posts: 37
    Stop torturing yourself by competing with your friend. Her body is different from yours.

    Worry about your body, your education....you cannot control how much or how little weight your friend loses.
  • zgdsmith
    zgdsmith Posts: 114 Member
    If you need support feel free to add me! :)

    You are donig great. Keep in mind that loosing inches (your paints needing pulled up) and not loosing pounds means you are gaining muscle and losing fat which is GREAT!!! I know it's discouraging i'm in the same boat as you here. I've only lost a couple pounds in a month but have lost alot of inches. I'm not sure if you have taken your measurements but I would strongly suggest you do. It really does make a difference.

    Try and focus on how you are feeling and how your clothes are fitting instead of the scale. Also, make sure you are eating enough to fuel your body. It sounds like you are getting good calorie burns!

    Keep up the good work!
  • gaia3rd
    gaia3rd Posts: 151
    You're unique, and so is your journey. Please don't compare yourself to your friend. However, you write you're struggling to eat 1200 calories AND burning 200-450 every day at the gym? That's only giving your body 750-1000 calories a day at the most to live on....and I'm afraid that's just not enough for good health. Since you already have issues with bulimia, I'd strongly recommend you find a professional you can talk to - most colleges have counseling services - so you can get to a healthy weight in a healthy way. Good luck, I'll be rooting for you.
  • jukeboxx
    jukeboxx Posts: 1
    The way you put it - I sound like a right *****. I don't freely advertise that I've lost weight to you as I'm hardly that mean and I'm only aiming to lose 2lb a week (which has been recommended to me). You're not doing it "the wrong way"; like the others say you're doing it your way which is great :) It's just I'm different. Keep going and it'll start to show (as it already has). :D p.s. josh doesn't think you're doing it the wrong way xxx
  • erickirb
    erickirb Posts: 12,294 Member
    The way you put it - I sound like a right *****. I don't freely advertise that I've lost weight to you as I'm hardly that mean and I'm only aiming to lose 2lb a week (which has been recommended to me). You're not doing it "the wrong way"; like the others say you're doing it your way which is great :) It's just I'm different. Keep going and it'll start to show (as it already has). :D p.s. josh doesn't think you're doing it the wrong way xxx
    2 lbs per week is only a safe goal if you have 75+ lbs to lose. Your pic doesn't look like you have much to lose. I would sugest 1lb per wek.
  • Helloitsdan
    Helloitsdan Posts: 5,564 Member
    Well, I'm 5ft 5, 18 years old, I weigh 137lbs, and of course am a female. And I've been using mfp for just under a month. It suggested me to have a minimum intake of 1,200kcals daily to lose 1 1/2 lbs a week. Now, when I first begun this healthier approach to my diet, (no longer touching anything processed, or anything really linked to 'junk' food) I'd lost 3lbs without really having to try.

    BUT, since I've started mfp, I've realised that I even struggle to reach an intake of 1,200 calories a day...even when I exercise! I've been going to the gym for about a month now, for 6 days a week, 30-80 minutes at a time doing cardio, burning on average 200-450 calories each time (I will start to incorporate strength training next week also)...and apart from the fact that my jeans need pulling up every few minutes, I haven't actually lost any weight.

    And then, my friend who'd started her weight loss journey at basically the same time as me, and who became aware of mfp 'cause I'd told her about it, burns so much more at the gym (600+ kcals) for the same length of time as me, has lost 1 stone in just the one month. I've lost 3lbs. And she wasn't big or anything to begin with. If anything she was smaller than me.

    And the problem is that if I do start to plan my meals like her, and start to REALLY kick things up a notch at the gym, I could be triggered back in to the bulimia I went through for six months last year (I'd lost 3 stone last year; 42lbs). I'm in university, and it really is THE biggest struggle trying to fit in going to the gym, especially when our final major project is starting in a week or so.

    I KNOW I need to keep concentrating on my HEALTH, and not on losing weight; if I make the slightest of mistakes, or slip up, then I could revert back to that disordered thinking. It's just so difficult for me now when my friend, this girl who's one of my flatmates comes in announcing of her weight loss, and her boyfriend, another of my flatmates has these big muscles, drinks protein shakes, and goes weight training almost daily tells me I'm not doing things the same as her, and that's why I'm not seeing results, and that I should work harder, and do this, and do that, and that I'm having too much peanut butter.

    I feel like crying. BUT I know that if I did, then that would be 'giving in', and I need to be strong, and positive, and confident with myself to better my HEALTH. NOT the number on the scale.


    SO, opinions? ADVICE? Help please, just shed some light on the matter. AM I not eating enough?

    Thank you. x

    Bump calories to 1800 because of your height and weight + activity factor.
    Youll lose more fat that way but maintain lean mass.
    Slow down and relax.
    Stress will halt weight loss.

    Lift heavy 3 times a week and walk 20 mins after dinner daily and youll be shocked at how easy this is.
  • chrishgt4
    chrishgt4 Posts: 1,222 Member
    At the level that you 2 girls are at - as has been mentioned above, 2lbs a week is just mental!

    0.5-1lb/ week, no more.

    also - the number on the scale shouldn't be the target - all that is, is another piece of information, not a goal.

    The aim is to look better and be healthier - if you look good at 115lbs or look good at 150 it makes no difference so don't put too much importance in some arbitrary number on a box.

    I really don't see how someone at the starting point you are both at could lose so much so quickly without a significant portion of it coming from muscle.
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