I need to know how other people handle this...
zuzuanne88
Posts: 104 Member
Hi, my name is stephanie.I just started on this journey and have about 77 pounds to go...my problem is that I feel so good about my lifestyle change at times,then I look at myself with disgust and say,"you're still fat and have a long way to go"!I look at thos 77 ponds like mount everest...Last night i had a small desert dish of chicken and mole.I tried a small portion because it was my husbands first try at cooking by himself...I thought it would be fine bacause I still had about 400 cal left till my daily goal...hours past guilt,guilt,guilt,guilt,then mordified.The scale said I gained 5 pounds of what I just lost!!!I had a complete melt down wich included sobbing on the bathroom floor,so much so I threw up.Please give me some advise how too handle my guilt and my anxieties over this huge hurdle I have to uncover.Thankyou.
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Replies
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Know that the scale doesn't tell all. Some people need not get on the scale frequently if it sets back your efforts. You could have had a high sodium day, maybe you didn't drink enough water yesterday, maybe you workout good yesterday which makes your muscles retain fluids. DON'T get discouraged, you did not gain 5 pounds over night. Keep doing what you know is the right thing for your body(AND stay off the scale):D
Best of luck! You can do this!0 -
Make sure when you weigh yourself it's around the same time of day. Weight fluctuates a few pounds throughout the day! I think that's important to keep in mind. Also, remember that virtually anything is okay in moderation. If you start to feel guilty over something you ate, try going for a brisk walk. It'll help you get over that anxiety and burn some calories. You can do it!0
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I agree stay off the scale, no more than once a week, especially not every day, and better only once a month, (although I could never do that) Keep up the good work and dont beat yourself up.0
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I only weigh myself once a week and take measurements at the same time, keeps me sane! when i weighed myself everyday i felt so rubbish because of the fluctuating during the day it just wasn't worth the hassle
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Instead of stepping on the scale take some measurements of your arms, thighs, belly and so on. Every week take the measurements again you will start to see a difference. Also take pictures of yourself. Every week update the photo. You will see the difference trust me,
Good luck and hang in there. Just remember you did not gain the 77 lbs over night, it took time and it will take time to get it back off.0 -
Know that the scale doesn't tell all. Some people need not get on the scale frequently if it sets back your efforts. You could have had a high sodium day, maybe you didn't drink enough water yesterday, maybe you workout good yesterday which makes your muscles retain fluids. DON'T get discouraged, you did not gain 5 pounds over night. Keep doing what you know is the right thing for your body(AND stay off the scale):D
Best of luck! You can do this!
Agreed. I weigh myself once every 2 weeks or so because my weight tends to fluctuate often. Just keep in mind that it takes a while to lose even a few pounds, it's certainly not an overnight change. Enjoy your food, make healthy/clean choices and exercise regularly and you'll be at your goal before you know it!0 -
For me I will weigh once every two weeks or once a month. I see the results that way.I think weighing your self everyday will be like watching the clock. It takes for ever to see any results.0
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your body weight fluctuates alot with water retention PMS and Periods e.t.c making it go up and down all the time I often weigh myself first thing in the morning and find I have not lost anything and then 2-3 hours later my loss shows for some reason my body retains fluids early morning the best time for me to weigh in is after my morning exercise and before my breakfast so usually around 11am this shows a more accurate reading BUT alot of fitness instructers would advise to only weigh in monthly cos of fluctuation in bodily fluids e.t.c
my advice is stay off the scales for at least 2 weeks follow your diet rigidly and do as much exercise as you can, take your measurements and I am sure you will see a loss in a couple of weeks
keep the chin up girl xxx0 -
Hi all!
Oh, I know how that feels!!! I try not to weigh myself too much because the dang scale will LIE LIE LIE!!! I ONLY weigh myself in the morning, bc (to me) it's the most accurate measurement of my weight. But every time I see all that progress gone, I wanna curse out the scale. Basically, I have to stop getting on the scale, and do something I feel good about, read a book, go for a walk, etc.
Another thing I love to combat those bad feelings is to take a workout video and do about 10 minutes of it. I bought one for $3 at a thrift store, and it's got workouts in 10 minute increments. I hope we all have 10 minuntes to give to our health. Good luck 0 -
I struggle with guilt as well when I overeat or eat something that is "not healthy". I find that if i don't wallow in my sorrows and do some sit ups or walk around the block I feel much better and motivate myslef to make better choices tomorrow. Almost learning from your feelings. No one wants to feel anxious about food, we need it to survive! You can do it!0
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I know, for me, it works to weigh myself once a week - usually Mondays. MFP isn't one of those diet plans that restricts your favourites which is why you shouldn't feel guilty about eating something you like. Don't stress and remember to try to keep active as much as possible, Calories in vs. calories out seems to be the right answer to getting your weight under control. I'm also so sorry to hear that you cried after a bad weigh in. Ease up on yourself, enjoy life and all it offers, moderation will help keep you on track. (So do MFP friends) Good luck!!!0
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Hi Stephanie. I know exactly how you feel. I have about 60ish more lbs to go and somedays I look at myself and think "I'll never be able to do it, why try." I've had to force myself to have a healther relationship with my scale. If the number goes down, I use that as positive motivation and it feels great - if the number goes up a ltitle, I use that as motivation to eat a little better, maybe not have that cookie, use the stairs a little more, and then the number goes down again. . You can do this!!! If I can, you can
Feel free to add me if you would like. Good luck! 0 -
Congratulations on your commitment to a healthy lifestyle! It is going to be a very hard journey but you can do it! I see the picture of your little one and know that you want to be a good role model for your child. So don’t get discouraged. Your weight is going to fluctuate. Everyone’s does. Like all the other posters said, don’t go by just the scale and don’t let it rule your happiness. You have to accept that there will be both successes and set backs. So when the scale gives you something you don’t like, accept it as a challenge and know that the next time you will change that number to something you like more! You can do it. Millions of people have.
Just stay positive, focused and accept this is a journey, a marathon, not a sprint. Look at the big picture and know you are making the necessary long-term changes for long term success.0 -
remember it is a life style change. You didn't gain it all in a month and you're not going to lose it all in a month. I need to loose 25-30 pounds. It crept up on me over the last 5 years so I know it's going to take a while to get it back off. I am hoping to most of it in about 6 months. A pound a week, slow and steady, if I make small changes I will have a better chance of keeping it off once I hit my goal.
I am not going to give up deserts and food I love forever so I am not giving them up now. Don't feel guilty if you eat something that's not super healthy -especially if you have budgeted the calories. I weigh my self once a week, first thing in the morning and measure myself once every 2 weeks. Give yourself some time and you will see progress.0 -
I know exactly how you're feeling. I used to go to a foodie friend's house and she would cook me ridiculously delicious food and not allow me to portion it. I would go home feeling full, bloated and step on the scale the next day to see my weeks hard won efforts wiped out and be five lbs heavier. It makes you feel terrible but know that most of the time it is sodium and excess water that has created that weight. Now I follow Fitnesspal, keep exercising and only weigh myself on Saturday mornings. It took me about a month to really figure out the food and I've now lost 5lbs and feel much better.
My favorite quote from the Healthy Body Facebook site:
Courage does not always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying "I will try again tomorrow"0 -
I bet most of your weight gain was sodium - I've gained up to 5lb over the course of the day after eating super salty popcorn. Drink lots of water to help flush it out of your system. And remember, weight loss isn't a sprint, it's a marathon - you might slow down or speed up along the way, but you'll get there eventually if you keep trying 0
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I would suggest not weighing yourself every day. I used to do that too and get extremely upset. I know it's really hard but move your scale where you don't see it every day and only weigh yourself once or twice a week. I promise it will help. It helped me a lot! I was at a plateu and it was simply because I was spending more time looking at the scale and stressing myself out that I couldn't focus on just keeping up with my life style change. Once I quit weighing myself every day, I instantly dropped 2 pounds in a week!
Also, I agree with the sodium intake. That probably had a ton to do with it. Just make sure you're drinking TONS of water every day!0 -
oh also try taking a few notes on your diaries, mood, stress etc. and look for patterns in your weight loss. Stress can have an effect on your weight loss for sure. For me I have already noticed that I seem to have a bigger weight loss just before my period and then the week I'm on my period I have little weight loss or a gain. Then the next week I go back to losing again. Your body has cycles too and if you recognize them you can help avoid some of the discouragement.0
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Here is what works for me:
I weigh and measure once a week. I measure my upper arm, chest, waist, hips and thigh. I do mine on Monday morning a few minutes after I get up, but before I head downstairs to get my coffee. I have found that my little victories to celebrate have come from my measurements versus the scale. I have lost 17.5 lbs since October 2011. But I have lost 18.5 inches total overall since then as well.
I have learned over the last few months that doing this once a week is more than enough. And that I celebrate all of my victories (scale and non-scale). I don't usually celebrate with a sweet or food in general. But last week I had dropped 4 inches from the previous week. So I am treating myself to a pedicure this Saturday. I am trying to change all of my bad habits and eating as a reward is one I am trying to change. Besides it is starting to warm up here where I live and will be sandal wearing weather. Want to have pretty feet.
Hope this helps you!0 -
Just keep working. Don't pay too much attention to the scale. If you know you eat well and workout hard, then stick with it. The big thing is not to quit. Keep going and keep pushing yourself and you will reach your goals.0
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Let me add to all the other great ideas here:
If you use a digital scale moving it upsets the 'balance'. You have to turn it on (and let it turn off) 4 times to re-set the balance.
I have also found that moving a non-digital scale can change it too!
May I also suggest: break you goal down into small units. You look at 77 and think "Holy Cow! How am i going to tackle that?"
Instead shoot for 10lbs and some kind of reward. Like new nail polish or a new download.
At 20lbs - get a manicure or pedicure.
etc.0 -
I can definitely relate to you I'm actually on medications for depression and anxiety and a lot of it comes right from being overweight. But i always like to remind myself with how I've changed the way im eating as long as im strict with myself every now and again its ok to have a little "cheat" as long as you dont allow yourself to "cheat" all the time and you back it up with exorcise you'll be fine. Bus try and focus on the positive and believe me I know it's hard but it will get better. Just remind yourself that the scale shouldn't be used all the time everyday you should weigh once a week and in the morning (better to do it after you have used the restroom) and that will give you the most accurate weight if you weigh in in the evening or after every time youve eaten you'll have extra "weight" because your full and that wouldn't be accurate. Try and stay positive and when you can't just focus on something that makes you happy . Good luck hope this helps0
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There's no way you gained 5 pounds of fat in one day, no matter how good the chicken was. Weight fluctuations happen for other reasons, and you get used to them. So long as you see a new low weight every once in a while, you know you're moving in the right direction. 0
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Stephanie you can do this. The scale is just a machine, don't let it control you. I used to weigh myself daily and in my case it was an unhealthy thing to do mentally. I now do it no more than once a month. (and at the same time each day)
I know people talk moderation, but sometimes maybe it's best to go cold turkey until the control for moderation is there? Just a thought and based strictly on my lack of portion control.
Don't be so hard on yourself either way. Life style changes are super hard, and the fact that you're posting here means you're off to a good start right?0 -
i started with over 100 lbs to lose which seems impossible, so i break it down into smaller chunks, so i always have a 'mini goal' to aim for -
10lbs / 20lbs / 30 lbs lost etc
under 200 / 190 / 180 etc
its physically impossible to gain 5lbs overnight from 400cals worth of food, its more than likely water weight due to sodium or something.
Dont stress too much, start taking measurements, get weighed only once a week, at the same time of day in the same clothes if possible, and just stick to what you are doing :-)0 -
I used to feel guilt over just about anything I ate that was not "healthy", and freak out about my weight. Now, If I have the calories left, I allow myself to indulge on a few not so healthy items from Friday to Monday and I limited my weigh-ins to Friday mornings only (even if I feel good on Tuesday I don't check). By using this combo I don't feel deprived and any high sodium or whatever else has ususally worked its way out by Friday morning so I feel the weights are more consistent. Add me if you'd like, I'm not perfect, but like you I'm giving it my best.0
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Aww, hun!! :frown: Everyone here is giving awesome advice so do try to follow what they say :flowerforyou: ... I just wanna give you a big ol' (((HUG)))
cause I feel your pain. Staying positive and finding yourself some good friends on here who will cheer you on through your journey will help, trust me. 0 -
Aw poor you, sounds like a tough few days.
It might help if you try and break down your courageous overall goal into sub-goals.
Like trying to lose 10lbs in five-six weeks.
And celebrate going down a dress size with a new dress or top. (Or something)
Weight can fluctuate so much even in one day (3-5lbs for me). I was advised to weigh once a week in the morning before breakfast so you dont have to count water retention.0 -
There were a lot of comments about the scale so I'm not going to add any more about that. However, as far as feeling like your remaining weight is Mt. Everest and your feelings of guilt with food, I can totally understand and relate. We got to our heaviest because of an unhealthy relationship/view of food. It takes a while, it took me 6 months, but you can change your view of yourself and of food. This process is just as much mental and emotional as it is physical.
First, try to replace any "IF I get to my goal weight..." with "WHEN I get to my goal weight" and similar ideas. You need to believe in yourself. Picture yourself how you want to look (even if it feels ridiculous or unattainable) and focus on that. I am a naturally negative thinker, especially critical of myself (Type A perfectionist here!) so it took a lot of work to change my thinking. As far as food goes, it is simply fuel. There should be no emotion attached to it, especially guilt. As long as you are within your calorie limits you are fine if you treat yourself every now and then. And guess what? Even if you go over a little and didn't get a chance to exercise, it is NOT the end of the world. You aren't going to gain 5 pounds from a couple hundred calories.0 -
There's no way you gained 5 pounds of fat in one day, no matter how good the chicken was. Weight fluctuations happen for other reasons, and you get used to them. So long as you see a new low weight every once in a while, you know you're moving in the right direction.
^^^^^^^^^^^
THIS
To gain 5 pounds in one day you would have to eat 17500 calories over not just your calorie goal here, but the number of calories you typically burn in a day which, if you are on a 2 pound per week weight loss goal, would be 1000 over your daily calorie goal. Since you had 400 calories left, and likely that 1000 calorie deficit per day, you would have had to have eaten 18900 calories of chicken mole. I don't think that you did that. The weight gain could be a whole bunch of things. Did you drink enough water so that any excess sodium from that meal could be eliminated from your system? If you didn't, you are likely retaining water which is the most common culprit in rapid weight gain. Drink lots of water and it will come off in a matter of days.0
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