I am so frustrated

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hello, my name is Amanda.. and I am frustrated extremely! I am breastfeeding my 22 month old son but in the process of weaning him. Prior to starting the weaning process though 99% of his nutrition came from me. I found myself quickly in "starvation mode" where my body started gaining again. When I got pregnant with him I weighed around 145 lbs. This was after diet/exercise brought me back down from 270lbs down to 141 lbs.. then maintained a little for a few months until I got pregnant. (was nursing then but not as much) Anyways I went up to 220 lbs when I gave birth to him. My lowest post birth was 157 lbs. TOday I weighed in at 180 lbs. I am frustrated... irritated... and shoot, I'd even love to cry about it. I felt my eyes get a little wet there. The first 13 lbs I packed on a few months ago when I tried getting back into Tae Bo which was where I had good progress losing weight before. THat is when I realized I was right on the fence line for starvation mode. I lost a little at first and then it bounced up and we just stayed there and maintained for awhile.. About 2 weeks ago I started getting active again because Spring has arrived... and I weighed myself and it was around 171--172... so I did great maintaining even without paying close attention. I have increased eating as i have increased my activity level as i knew I needed more calories though I did not eat all of my calories back. I went from being relatively idle (i.e. facebook or reading books) to doing yard work 3-7 hours a day. I got on the scale for the first time today and that is when i just wanted to bawl... Now I am 180 lbs again!

I want this weight to come offf!! I have no intention of slowing down my yard work. Winter might return and Iwant all of this done. I have a large family and I NEEEEEEEEED this garden.. Food prices are making it harder to get quality food for my family and I dont want to increase the carbs just to decrease my budget. I want and need this fresh organic produce flowing forth from my garden and I have a lot of work to get done in time for planting. I eat until I am full and i am snacking... doing whatever i can to keep my metabolism higher but without eating more than i am burning.

Roughly I am consuming 2300-4000 cals a day. (less on days i do less.. highest on the busiest days) i figure my son consumes about 900 cals a day right now. (at his age he needs about 1300 cals so i adjust his intake based upon what i see him eating in food... this is changing as some days I am able to get him down to nursing less than 50% of his daily needs. He is a very active boy! so i cannot be certain of what he takes from me.. just basing it on websites of what the average toddler needs a day. Then my activity levels for this week according to MFP has been anywhere from 1200 cals burned a day in activity up to 2400ish cals. Yes, I have stayed busy sun up to sun down at least once this past week.. Busy busy... shoveling, raking, pounding in t-posts etc.

I know my body is hoarding thinking its becoming a famine for me. (the fat is packing on right a my hip level.. I went from size 10 to 16...) What else can I do besides eat even more? Would there be any harm is just plowing through this and keep on doing my yard work? I'd lik to think that building up this muscle would in the end help me out to re-lose this weight once my metabolism stablizes (i.e. son is weaned) I

And just to eliminate the idea- I tested for pregnancy and it was negative. So that is not why I am gaining weight either. (saw a friend once get terribly frustrated over a growing belly and 7 months later she gave birth to a little boy :P)

I just wish I knew what I could do to get my body to stop holding onto this... if my milk dried up i'd be totally fine! but no, it works perfectly and has decided to make my nursing its top priority apparently :(

Replies

  • Mandathehillbilly
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    I wanted to add that I always have more fat and protein than MFP says I need... and I eat less than 40% of the carbs.
  • Helloitsdan
    Helloitsdan Posts: 5,564 Member
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    How tall are you?
    Body fat%?
    How much do you weigh now?
    How often do you work out?
  • beckajw
    beckajw Posts: 1,738 Member
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    Are you sure you're not eating too much?

    Even with breastfeeding and working out, 4000 calories seems like a lot. My sister is breastfeeding right now and maintaining, while eating around 1800-2000 calories per day.

    Have you tried figuring out your TDEE?
  • lwoods34
    lwoods34 Posts: 302 Member
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    without seeing your diary, no one can really make any recommendations as far as maybe increasing protein intake, carb intake, etc.
  • Mandathehillbilly
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    I am 5'5, My ideal weight for my body frame/structure is about 140 lbs. Not sure what my current body fat % is but my waist line throws it all off. My legs look fantastic. My arms have a little jello but the problem is all in the waist. I am outside doing yard work anywhere from 3 hours to 8 hours a day. i do not do exercise outside of yard work.
  • lwoods34
    lwoods34 Posts: 302 Member
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    I breastfed my son for 12 months (he is now 17 months) and I only ate an extra 500 calories per day to account for breastfeeding and I was able to consistently lose 1 lb per week. I was eating maybe 2000-2300 calories per day AND working out 7 days per week. I know you are doing alot of yard work but to eat 4,000 calories seems like way too much.
  • mnstuebs
    mnstuebs Posts: 5
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    Manda--I took a peeky pooh, and I'm thinking you need more fresh foods in your diet. Lots more veggies, and where are your fruits? And try googling how many calories breastfeeding burns?? I'm not quite sure it burns as much as you think. Also, I wonder if you should think about investing in a HRM to determine just how many calories you burn in a day. It might make it easier to know how much to eat. And definitely think you need more fresh foods in your diet. If you are opposed to eating fruit because of the carbs, just make sure to combine your fruit with a small protein. :) Good luck. You can do it! You've done it before woman!
  • Mandathehillbilly
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    I had an internet fart for a moment. I juts went and filled in the last two days. Melanie- that comes down to food budget :( I can get a bigger caloric punch with meat than I can with veggies. ANyways. I am opening it up to the public. I just had to go fill in the lasttwo days of food.

    And no, I am not overestimating breastfeeding. WEbsites say that a boy Josiahs age needs 1,000-1,300 cals a day. Up til the last few days, he was nearly exclusively breastfed. (how many 22 month olds still have yellow poop?) bought him a bunch of cereal, bananas and pepperoni and he seems to be happy to make the transition to big people food lol. So right now im at about 50% breastfeeding him but still... that is a lot of milk demand when you consider he is a 30 lb, nearly 2 year old. He still breastfeeds about 4 times during the day and 3-4 times at night.
  • Mandathehillbilly
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    BTW I was able to eat less and exercise more up until he was 18 months old. That is when things changed up and I started putting weight back on instead of losing it.
  • inside_lap
    inside_lap Posts: 738 Member
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    Are you sure your calorie burn is accurate? If so, great burns!! If your not certain, you might want to invest in something that keeps more accurate track of your calorie burn as it seems really high. I know money is tight with kids. Also, I know when I was breastfeeding, I was told not to eat more then 300-500 calories more then my normal diet (in essence the same rule that applies for when your pregnant). Research says that "starvation mode" does not actually make you gain weight. Your metabolism slows down to try to counter the dramatic decrease in calories but you will still net a loss not a gain in weight as your metabolism will not shut down enough to counter the lower calorie intake. The concern is that once you increase your intake, you will gain significant weight due to your lower metabolism. Generally true "starvation mode" does not occur until you consistenly fall to half your BMR.
  • inside_lap
    inside_lap Posts: 738 Member
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    Have you visited a doctor to make sure nothing is going on?
  • Mandathehillbilly
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    well i am eating more recently with the increased activity ... about 1000 more a day because of my activity changes. but that still should not result in 10 lbs in 10 days :( I always have a lot of pepperoni so i dont think it is sodium related. But I will try cutting back on those. It is possible my water intake has gone down since i am outside and not regularly sipping all day long. I guess best case scenario- im just retaining water.
  • inside_lap
    inside_lap Posts: 738 Member
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    *hugs* I'm going to keep my fingers crossed for water retention. A body can hold ALOT of water! If drinking more water doesn't help, I would recommend seeing a doctor just for peace of mind. Or maybe your scale is just broken? I can make my scale move 4 pounds just by standing in different parts of it (lol)... but I have a cheap scale. Between that and the fact that everyone's weight fluxes a couple of pounds throughout the day, I can be looking at a 5 to 6 pound gain (or loss) when no gain (or loss) truly occured. Great job getting out in the sun and active by the way!
  • missigus
    missigus Posts: 207 Member
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    I've made the mistake of thinking my body needed more calories because I was not losing weight, so I ate more, and gained more. That isn't always the case. I have to maitain a lower than average intake to lose. Also, if it is that much of a struggle maybe you should get a blood work -up done. Sometimes pregnancy will throw off your hormones, like thyroid and no matter what you eat or how much you exercise it will not make a bit of difference.

    That being said, 300 to 500 cal. sounds better as far as the extra calories you need to breast feed, thats what I was told years ago, and so have my younger friends who have recently had babies. Yes- your volume of milk production has gone up I'm sure since he is drinking more, but you need to remember that if he's eating people foods, which at 22 months he is, you do not have to provide all of his calories any longer. 4000 calories seems WAY high to me for any one breast feeding and active or not. I garden too. Yes it burns calories, but I think MFP over estimates that. I only count 1/2 the calories they list for that activity. I agree- get a heart rate monitor and you will know better what your burn is. I know that my heart rate is not constantly high gardening. Yes, muscles get sore etc. but its a lot of strength stuff which doesn't always =a high calorie output.

    You're best bet may be to talk to your dr. or a le leche (sp?) Breast feeding specialist, to find out what you need to be doing as far as calories. You can probably google breast feeding council or whatever and give one of the nurse lines a call. Good Luck! I hope you get it figured out.
  • nutandbutter
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    Producing 1 oz of milk burns about 20 calories. If you've been gaining, you're eating too much.
  • Mandathehillbilly
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    not always... some days he ONLY breastfeeds. I realize people do not read every post. But yes, at 22 months old, at least one day a week he has yellow diapers. You know the kind that usually is only seen in the new born days? Because he drinks THAT much breastmilk! I dont under estimate how much he nurses.. Up til the last few days he nursed no less than 12 times a day. At 22 months and 30 lbs-he IS taking a lot from me. At 4000 calories on a day I burn approx 2600 in 9 hours of yard work... that would leave me 1400 even if I didn't breastfeed. Caloric needs for him is minimally 1,000 cals a day for his weight/age/amount of breastfeeding.This isn't sitting on my butt gardening type yard work. This is grabbing a shovel and digging, moving large amounts of compost, slamming in posts for a new pasture fence... Where even at 55 degrees I get hot and sweaty for extended periods of time.
  • nutandbutter
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    I actually did read every post.