ashamed to run

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Replies

  • taylordnmn
    taylordnmn Posts: 4 Member
    I echo everyone's sentiment. It IS tough when you're not at your highest confidence level to be out there, but in the end, what's the alternative? Listen to music, focus on how your body feels, and remember why you're toughing it out and how far you've come. After a while, those feelings of shame will be replaced by feelings of pride in yourself for taking action to become healthier. As for getting back into running, I noticed a few folks who talked about walk/run programs like the Couch to 5K; I echo that sentiment, too. I was a pretty avid runner but got hurt and had to take time off to heal. I am doing a walk/run program through Runner's World that is an eight week program designed to get anyone to the point where he or she can run for 30 minutes continuously. The Couch to 5K and others work the same way and yield great results for anyone wanting to slowly (and safely) get into running. As long as you are healthy and don't have any knee or joint issues, why not try one of those programs? They are self-paced, meaning if the running segments are too much for you, you simply walk. And if you find that at 250 lbs, a run/walk program is too strenuous, then just walk. Walking is highly underrated and under-appreciated as a great, low-impact weight loss method. It does a lot for the body and the mind! Good luck to you!
  • heavensshadow
    heavensshadow Posts: 264 Member
    I started out taking residential routes to ease into being seen jogging along with all my fluff. Now, I own the street when I'm out. And my favorite thing? Out-pacing or out-running someone who *looks* smaller and more fit than I do.
    Just 'cause you're tiny doesn't mean you're in shape! Besides, bigger people out running is inspiring and impressive to me.... if some people are a**holes, brush it off.....Who cares anyway? They won't be a**holes when you're one hot mamma!
  • dtucker4403
    dtucker4403 Posts: 47 Member

    Great thread. I feel the same way. Anyone trying to better themselves should be applauded. Everyone is at a different place in their journey, what matters is your are working toward your goal. Don't let anyone stop you.

    Go for it !!!
  • catelabow
    catelabow Posts: 77 Member
    I know the feeling. It was hard for me to start, at about 250, but I did it, and it felt a little better each time. I started out running at 5 am in the dark, and now I keep doing it because I love it. You can do whatever you want, it's public space! Good luck!
  • thekarens
    thekarens Posts: 254 Member
    You know, it doesn't matter where you are, that's a common problem/issue. I hate going to the gym where I "think" people are staring at me. I'm overweight and I've got severe rosacia so I look like a lobster when I get on the treadmill, elliptical, etc. Occasionally I've been tempted to say "take a picture, it will last longer!" But instead I think to myself, "Heck with them, I'm doing this for me and my family. They don't matter."

    So, good for you! Go for it and keep it up and don't sweat what others may or may not be thinking!
  • jetabear10
    jetabear10 Posts: 375 Member
    I feel exactly the same way and don't run for that reason (plus it hurts my knees to run when I weigh so much) but if it is really something you want and love to do then who cares what other people think. You need to do what you want to make yourself happy. Just crank the headphones and block them out! (and before you know it...YOU will be one of those skinny runners that you see passing by the window!) Chin up girl! YOU are a STAR!!!
  • avasano
    avasano Posts: 487 Member
    Just do it, it does not matter what anyone thinks. Chances are you will inspire someone else to run. Have fun.
  • redwoodbsq1
    redwoodbsq1 Posts: 30 Member
    I have been ashamed to run too!! After i while I said f@#%$ it and did what I wanted but it was hard. Here's what I've learned:

    #1 I only wear the 'running' clothes when it is summer. They're skin tight and it's just killer on my psyche. I just run in a sports bra and a t-shirt. Helps me mentally knowing it's a bit less revealing.

    I also have a problem where shorts 'ride up' in the crotch when running. I bought some super breathable cotton yoga capris- they're sooo nice to run in and I don't have to 'adjust' when running in them (which was SOOO embarrassing!). They're also really soft and I wanna get more because I just find myself lounging in them.

    #2 I love to run on trails. Much more private. I do live with the Rockies right there so I understand if this might not be an option for you. I'd advise it if you can; trees keep line of sight down and lets me get in my groove.

    #3 I understand when people stare at me it's just human nature. I stare at people doing stuff while pumping gas; it's just something peeps do. I never take it all that serious, and if it gets to me I wave. They usually wave back and I realize they're not really judging me just watching the most interesting 'tv' in front of them.

    #4 One thing I never used to do is run with someone else. WAY to mortifying. I had to be married to my hubby for almost 3 years before I would run with him. I thought "OMG I just run so damn slow it will be SOOO embarrassing." Last week I started running when we were hiking, I went in front and set the pace. It was uber rewarding. Now I am so much less self conscious about running.

    I hope this helps- getting the clothing right was the #1 thing for me running in public with confidence!
  • thalv3
    thalv3 Posts: 1
    Take it from an old lady - it's not all about you. My son had to drive that home to me to get me back into the gym. People might look at you because you are just there - they aren't necessarily noticing you. Most people don't pay attention to you as much as you think they do; most people are focused on themselves and their own lives and anyone who might be judging you needs to get a life. Secondly, you are projecting your own issues on to others. I think it is more likely that they will be inspired and impressed by your efforts to get healthier. I admire people I see working out hard who are in worse shape than me and it inspires me to work harder (if she can do it at that level, then I have no excuses and better kick it up a notch).
  • crazybusymom
    crazybusymom Posts: 5 Member
    you should get out there! i bet you'd be surprised at how inspirational other runners (of all sizes), who aren't too exhausted themselves to notice you, will find you to be! plus, it feels great to run in the spring!
  • MrsEb79
    MrsEb79 Posts: 42 Member
    I weigh 229 pounds and I'm a runner. I'm learning to accept my body and all it's imperfections. I can run with no knee pain or aches and pains. I ran a half marathon last summer and rocked it like no one's business. My weight is only a number. It's hard work to learn to get over it. If you have the drive and the will, you can do ANYTHING!
  • willafan
    willafan Posts: 101
    Hi There - I understand and I know that feeling of not wanting to have people look at you. I'll give you the advice I usually give myself- in reality, most people are only going to give you a quick glance and then move on with their day. Also, you most likely look SO much better than you are giving yourself credit for- women and girls are incredibly hard on themselves (count me in) and that makes it harder still.
    I know that's probably not going to "fix" your challenge but this is the mantra i repeat to myself when I feel the way you do. I was running outside this morning feeling some of those very feelings you are describing. Then i tried to focus on the beautiful sunrise and listen to the birds singing up a storm. i also realized once again how lucky I am to have a strong and healthy body and while it's not perfect, it's good enough. I'd encourage you to go out there and run- you'll be glad you did! Hang in there:)
  • avasano
    avasano Posts: 487 Member
    Hey! When I go to the gym I zone out. I am not looking at anyone, just thinking about my day. If a person is in my line of sight I don't even "see" them and couldn't tell you what they looked like after I leave. I am just deep in thought, staring off in a direction. Try not to take it personal. They may be thinking of work or home or kids. You just never know. Keep positive.
  • froeschli
    froeschli Posts: 1,292 Member
    i get a bit self conscious because my face will go beet red when i run a bit harder than leisurely. but then i don't care, because people can tell i am putting in an effort :)
    so far, i've had only good experiences with the people i've encountered, well, except for two teen runners mockingly imitating my 'technique' - turns out, they were right and i was actually doing something (minor) wrong. i wouldn't have bothered to look at proper technique if it hadn't been for them, so hey, in the end something positive came of it...

    generally, runners will only support you, and with anyone who isn't running (nearly all of them are supportive too btw) i always think "ha! at least i'm doing something!" - self righteousness can take you quite a distance :tongue:
  • crazybusymom
    crazybusymom Posts: 5 Member
    i'm with wildflower!!! that's some great advice...
  • colorlessgreen
    colorlessgreen Posts: 173 Member
    Good job on your work so far! You should definitely be proud of yourself. :) Even though I'm at a very normal body weight, I still am self-conscious about exercising in public. I've run two marathons (when I was at a lower weight) and even after the first one, I couldn't bring myself to say I was "a runner." I just didn't feel legit -- like I belonged to the group of people who were "runners." There are a couple things to take away from that: 1) you're totally not alone in feeling self-conscious, and 2) the issue really is a mental hurdle, more than a physical one. Just remember that some of the runners you see in your neighborhood probably feel the same way about themselves.

    But I think the most important thing to remember is that there are always going to be stupid people who judge you, and who cares about them? I know it's easy to SAY, and harder to DO, because I have always been very insecure about how people think of me, and HAVE to feel like everyone likes me. (I'm finally getting over this, with help from a counselor. Yay!) But I have a kind of funny story that helps keep me in check:

    One day when I was marathon training, I had to do a 16 mile run. At around mile 13, I was running on a pedestrian street (State Street in Madison, WI -- I love it!). I am not a fast runner, and my long runs were even slower, so needless to say, I was not moving very fast at that point. Suddenly, I heard a voice yell (in a snarky tone), "You better move a little faster, or you're never gonna make it there!" I looked over, and it was a morbidly obese guy -- like 8 inches of bare belly hanging out from under his t-shirt -- DRINKING A MILKSHAKE. I was stunned for a second, and then I couldn't help but laugh, and think, "F**k that guy!"

    There are always going to be haters. Forget them. For all the stupid judgmental people, there are 20 who will see you and think, "Wow, good for her. Maybe I should try running."
  • Taylerr88
    Taylerr88 Posts: 320 Member
    just do it.

    there is nothing to be ashamed about when your trying to become healthy.
  • This is an awesome thread! Thanks so much for posting your fear, and to everyone who is encouraging. It is my fear too! Shame is an ugly thing that we are taught. Time to break through! I just only found out about C25k from a fellow MFP Pal today! I will check it out. Good skill and happy first jog lovely! V
  • lmclellan68
    lmclellan68 Posts: 8 Member
    I was actually heavier than you when I started running in late November. I have completed the Couch to 5K running program and now I'm on Week 3 Day 2 of the Bridge to 10K program. I'm definitely a slow runner, but I'm running about 4 miles now and loving it!!! I'm down 27 pounds so far and still have 80something to go, but I just can't tell you how much better I feel. I totally understand the feeling embarassed, but like my 19 year old son told me, "you will just have to get over it"! Yes, I was very self-conscious for awhile, but I took his advice got out there and did it. Also being bigger, I was worried about injuring my knees from running, but so far, I have had no problems and am still going strong!!! As I ran past our school the other evening (before dark), they were having the high school sports banquet so a lot of our high school athletes and their parents were arriving at the school and I just ran on past so I guess you could say I got over it! HA!! Best of luck to you!!!!
  • hottiebikerchick
    hottiebikerchick Posts: 187 Member
    I'd rather see a bigg girl running rather than continuing ot stuff her face at the buffet- its all a choice... I just started running and Im 230. I dont care what anyone thinks because my health IS more important than the general public's opinion! Go for it and dont look back! When Im at the track, I like to holler ahead and say "watch out, fat girl running here".....it gets a laugh and usually I get encouragement and not snickers!
  • myogibbs
    myogibbs Posts: 182
    Do you want to honestly know what I think when I see a big person exercising? I think...GOOD FOR HER! I say go for it...you know, sooner than you realize, you will be one of those skinny girls and then you can inspire someone else!!! Start slow & build up...otherwise...GO FOR IT!
  • fluecok
    fluecok Posts: 52
    i went for a jog last night and this morning in shorts!
    i had to convince my self to get out there in them too lol

    but once i was there and saw everyone else in less clothes
    i felt better

    because at the end of the day

    we are all there for the same purpose!!!!
  • If you feel comfortable jogging the do it. If it feels uncomfortable the walk. I have to walk due to my knees, but I walk fast! Do what you can and push a little to do more.
  • SassyCalyGirl
    SassyCalyGirl Posts: 1,932 Member
    Hi all, I have been actually eating like a normal human being for the last 3 weeks! I am very proud because it hasnt happened to me in a very very long time. Now that I feel I have fallen into a comfort zone and can sustain this lifestyle until I lose weight, I think it's time for excercise. SO I used to love to jog....now the weather is so gorgeous and I want to run outside. But I am huge and am so embarrassed to run in the street. everyone I see running is so tiny and looks great. If I saw a 250lb woman coming at me while driving, I'd be scared! SO I want to run...but am ashamed....anyone else have this problem? I would love some support. Also is it safe to jog at that weight? ( I would probably start dying after 1 minute of a very light jog) but is even that safe? I'd love any ideas on how to get started?

    when I started years ago after 2 minutes I thought I was going to die- now I run 6.2 miles daily and its easy! You need to Just Do it. Don't worry about how you look or what others are thinking. Running is my life-its addicting. You will only get better-faster-and leaner. This is YOUR journey-take charge!
  • Don't worry about what other people think. When I see someone running (no matter their size) I want to beep my horn and say way to go! I started running again at 250 lbs and am now 232. Go slow, I would suggest a walk/run program where you gradually increase the time that you run. Remember, "no matter how slow you go you are still lapping those on the couch". Good luck on your journey!
  • Fashionista012
    Fashionista012 Posts: 51 Member
    amazing advice from everyone!!! many many thanks! love you guys
  • journalistjen
    journalistjen Posts: 265 Member
    Don't be embarrassed. I was 267 lbs, now 245 lbs, and I run. I was surprised, but most people that saw me running were supportive and nice. I suggest interval training until you can get to where you can run a sustained 20 to 30 minutes at a time. Be sure to wear proper clothing for support and comfort.
  • MrsEb79
    MrsEb79 Posts: 42 Member
    When I'm out running, I feel like a super star. Everyone that passes me is probably wishing they were out running. Or that they could run at all. I just get into my zone and do my thing and pay no attention to the haters. I run for me, and no one else.
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