Rant

Options
sparkly96
sparkly96 Posts: 120
in Health and Weight Loss
Here's my rant since so many of us are so opiniated here:

So what if someone has their diary private - what works for some doesnt work for others. There are a number of threads on this topic. Some may need help with their diet and their diary is closed, negative criticism isnt going to be helpful. If you feel you cant be of help move on to the next person instead of questioning why their diary is private.

Caloric intake - advice is great except when it comes in a negative form from people who are not MD's. We are all different and again what works for some may not for others. Different ideas are great but not when its worded in a negative way. Your way is not the only way or the right way.

Mocking threads - Really??? Are we adults or children. I know everyone has a right to say what they want but come on, so childish. We dont have better things to do?

I know I will get backlash and i will get positive remarks. I also know I have a choice and dont have to read these threads and for the most part have chosen to stay out of them since the other day. These forums could be so much more constructive and helpful. I seen people post how these threads are not what they used to be. It's a damn shame when i read people say they dont normally post because they are afraid of being attacked. That's really sad that people may need help or advice and they cant post a question on here.
«1

Replies

  • scott091501
    scott091501 Posts: 1,260 Member
    Options
    If you're asking for dietary advice but one can't see what you're eating it's all moot. As to the mocking threads.... welcome to the internet. Go over to 4chan and then see how mocking the threads really are.
  • Michele7091
    Michele7091 Posts: 256 Member
    Options
    If you're asking for dietary advice but one can't see what you're eating it's all moot.

    I agree. I could care less if someone has their diary locked but when they post a thread wanting advice on why what they're doing isn't working or pointers on what they should or shouldn't be eating its very difficult to try and help them if its locked.
  • sparkly96
    sparkly96 Posts: 120
    Options
    If you're asking for dietary advice but one can't see what you're eating it's all moot. As to the mocking threads.... welcome to the internet. Go over to 4chan and then see how mocking the threads really are.

    I hear ya on that, BUT some people instead of asking the person personally (send a message or whatever) whats going on, will criticize that person for having their diaries closed.
  • scott091501
    scott091501 Posts: 1,260 Member
    Options
    If you're asking for dietary advice but one can't see what you're eating it's all moot. As to the mocking threads.... welcome to the internet. Go over to 4chan and then see how mocking the threads really are.

    I hear ya on that, BUT some people instead of asking the person personally (send a message or whatever) whats going on, will criticize that person for having their diaries closed.

    Saying to someone "I can't help if you have your diary closed." Isn't a criticism, it's fact. Don't make the thread if you aren't going to open your diary for people to scrutinize. As you indicated diet is highly individualized and if you ask for individualized advice then you should open your diary.
  • maf66
    maf66 Posts: 211 Member
    Options
    If you're asking for dietary advice but one can't see what you're eating it's all moot. As to the mocking threads.... welcome to the internet. Go over to 4chan and then see how mocking the threads really are.

    I hear ya on that, BUT some people instead of asking the person personally (send a message or whatever) whats going on, will criticize that person for having their diaries closed.

    Saying to someone "I can't help if you have your diary closed." Isn't a criticism, it's fact. Don't make the thread if you aren't going to open your diary for people to scrutinize. As you indicated diet is highly individualized and if you ask for individualized advice then you should open your diary.

    I couldn't agree more. There are so many who post "What am I doing wrong" and "I need help" but don't allow their diary's to be seen. It's rather ridiculous.
  • sparkly96
    sparkly96 Posts: 120
    Options
    If you're asking for dietary advice but one can't see what you're eating it's all moot. As to the mocking threads.... welcome to the internet. Go over to 4chan and then see how mocking the threads really are.

    I hear ya on that, BUT some people instead of asking the person personally (send a message or whatever) whats going on, will criticize that person for having their diaries closed.

    Saying to someone "I can't help if you have your diary closed." Isn't a criticism, it's fact. Don't make the thread if you aren't going to open your diary for people to scrutinize. As you indicated diet is highly individualized and if you ask for individualized advice then you should open your diary.

    Oh no thats not criticism at all BUT when the person is told how and why they should have their diary open and how it works for them and whats the matter with you, and how could you not have it open, then thats critism. I rarely see a simple non critical response like your diary is closed, but what is your caloric intake, what are you eating, PM me so we can talk, etc...
  • sparkly96
    sparkly96 Posts: 120
    Options
    If you're asking for dietary advice but one can't see what you're eating it's all moot. As to the mocking threads.... welcome to the internet. Go over to 4chan and then see how mocking the threads really are.

    I hear ya on that, BUT some people instead of asking the person personally (send a message or whatever) whats going on, will criticize that person for having their diaries closed.

    Saying to someone "I can't help if you have your diary closed." Isn't a criticism, it's fact. Don't make the thread if you aren't going to open your diary for people to scrutinize. As you indicated diet is highly individualized and if you ask for individualized advice then you should open your diary.

    I couldn't agree more. There are so many who post "What am I doing wrong" and "I need help" but don't allow their diary's to be seen. It's rather ridiculous.

    There's a lot of criticism and negativity on these boards it may be harder for people in need to reach out and keep their diaries open.
  • scott091501
    scott091501 Posts: 1,260 Member
    Options
    If you're asking for dietary advice but one can't see what you're eating it's all moot. As to the mocking threads.... welcome to the internet. Go over to 4chan and then see how mocking the threads really are.

    I hear ya on that, BUT some people instead of asking the person personally (send a message or whatever) whats going on, will criticize that person for having their diaries closed.

    Saying to someone "I can't help if you have your diary closed." Isn't a criticism, it's fact. Don't make the thread if you aren't going to open your diary for people to scrutinize. As you indicated diet is highly individualized and if you ask for individualized advice then you should open your diary.

    Oh no thats not criticism at all BUT when the person is told how and why they should have their diary open and how it works for them and whats the matter with you, and how could you not have it open, then thats critism. I rarely see a simple non critical response like your diary is closed, but what is your caloric intake, what are you eating, PM me so we can talk, etc...

    Sorry if the person wanted to handle it through PMs then they should have messaged someone they found to be knowledgeable. If they're going to ask the general populous for advice than open the diary. And if they are going to take the step of asking the general populous they should be prepared to take the good responses with the bad. Sorry that's just the way message boards work.
  • kateroot
    kateroot Posts: 435
    Options
    It's the internet. People (myself included) tend to abandon their social filters, and when that happens you get unabashed honesty. Could people be nicer? Sure. But it is what it is.
  • sparkly96
    sparkly96 Posts: 120
    Options
    It's the internet. People (myself included) tend to abandon their social filters, and when that happens you get unabashed honesty. Could people be nicer? Sure. But it is what it is.

    This is 100% true
  • FireTigerSoul
    FireTigerSoul Posts: 274 Member
    Options

    There's a lot of criticism and negativity on these boards it may be harder for people in need to reach out and keep their diaries open.

    I hear you 100%. I agree that if you ask for help, you should have your diary open so that people could help you. However, I've seen threads posted by people ranting about others who have their diary closed. They didn't ask for help; they were bring singled out because they didn't have their diary open.

    I understand how frustrating it is to see the same questions pop up on the boards over and over again, but...some people just don't know how to get around a message board. Some barely know how to post, let alone search for an answer. We were all new once, why not be positive and supportive instead of condescending and rude? Just politely tell them how to use the search button and explain they might not get an answer because it's been asked over and over again.

    As to the mocking threads.... welcome to the internet. Go over to 4chan and then see how mocking the threads really are.

    Thinking like this is why this board is never going to change. :/ Set a good example, be a good person, and report those who are breaking the community rules. That includes mocking, belittling, and not having respect for other people.
  • sparkly96
    sparkly96 Posts: 120
    Options

    There's a lot of criticism and negativity on these boards it may be harder for people in need to reach out and keep their diaries open.

    I hear you 100%. I agree that if you ask for help, you should have your diary open so that people could help you. However, I've seen threads posted by people ranting about others who have their diary closed. They didn't ask for help; they were bring singled out because they didn't have their diary open.


    I understand how frustrating it is to see the same questions pop up on the boards over and over again, but...some people just don't know how to get around a message board. Some barely know how to post, let alone search for an answer. We were all new once, why not be positive and supportive instead of condescending and rude? Just politely tell them how to use the search button and explain they might not get an answer because it's been asked over and over again.

    As to the mocking threads.... welcome to the internet. Go over to 4chan and then see how mocking the threads really are.

    Thinking like this is why this board is never going to change. :/ Set a good example, be a good person, and report those who are breaking the community rules. That includes mocking, belittling, and not having respect for other people.

    You are so right. I agree if you ask for help it's hard for people to help you if your diary is closed.
    Criticism of people with closed diaries is ridiculous, to each his own ya know.

    I'm fairly new and if i have a question i'll search for the answer first but like you said you get some people that dont know their way around MFP and people can respond in a rude way.

    Setting a good example and being polite isnt used too often on these boards. I only recently saw you could report a thread or post. I do see threads being taken down so i guess the moderators have their work cut out for them.
  • vemaddox
    vemaddox Posts: 133 Member
    Options
    Can I add one more thing? This maybe more my rant but if someone asks for input about a new diet they are starting and others have used (myself i just started using medi weight loss clinics) give encouragement even if you may not agree with it. Telling them its a fad diet and its never going to work and they just need to eat right and excerise doesn't help...Personal I know thats what I need to do, I just need help starting and reteaching myself the good habits thats I lost over the last 4 years. Not everyone loses the same way and uses MFP in the same way. Dont critizes people just because you dont like it. Let them do what they need to do....


    Like momma says "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."
  • sparkly96
    sparkly96 Posts: 120
    Options

    Like momma says "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."


    Agreed!!!!
  • susannamarie
    susannamarie Posts: 2,148 Member
    Options
    Can I add one more thing? This maybe more my rant but if someone asks for input about a new diet they are starting and others have used (myself i just started using medi weight loss clinics) give encouragement even if you may not agree with it. Telling them its a fad diet and its never going to work and they just need to eat right and excerise doesn't help...Personal I know thats what I need to do, I just need help starting and reteaching myself the good habits thats I lost over the last 4 years. Not everyone loses the same way and uses MFP in the same way. Dont critizes people just because you dont like it. Let them do what they need to do....


    Like momma says "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."

    Advice CAN be given in a non-snarky way ... and I would agree that it should be, as it's more likely to be received. But a blanket no-naysaying-posts-whatsoever is generally counterproductive. In general I would assume that someone who asks for input (such as "has anyone tried xxx?") would want both the positive and negative input. I certainly wouldn't want people to feel compelled to respond to my posts only with 'you go girl! good idea!' because they feel they can't tell me that what I'm doing is knuckleheaded.
  • des24rob
    des24rob Posts: 77 Member
    Options
    Re: If you can't say anything nice...

    Agreed!
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,121 Member
    Options
    I think people will always try to create balance. Many of us spend a couple hours a day on here. We've all been jumped on for topics and opinions. I know I have. In most cases, I deserved it.

    If someone has legitimate questions, that's one thing. To begin threads like this just looking for validation is annoying.
  • Masterchef2000
    Masterchef2000 Posts: 127 Member
    Options

    Thinking like this is why this board is never going to change. :/ Set a good example, be a good person, and report those who are breaking the community rules. That includes mocking, belittling, and not having respect for other people.

    Thank you! It's so wonderful to see someone else have this mind-set. :-) Part of the solution, I'd say!
  • cyclerjenn
    cyclerjenn Posts: 835 Member
    Options
    Can I add one more thing? This maybe more my rant but if someone asks for input about a new diet they are starting and others have used (myself i just started using medi weight loss clinics) give encouragement even if you may not agree with it. Telling them its a fad diet and its never going to work and they just need to eat right and excerise doesn't help...Personal I know thats what I need to do, I just need help starting and reteaching myself the good habits thats I lost over the last 4 years. Not everyone loses the same way and uses MFP in the same way. Dont critizes people just because you dont like it. Let them do what they need to do....


    Like momma says "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."

    Completely agree. We are all here for support what works for one may not work for someone else. This is all trial and error to find what works for you so just support your fellow MFPers and help them in anyway they need it.
  • Jess11079
    Jess11079 Posts: 26
    Options
    Here's my rant since so many of us are so opiniated here:

    So what if someone has their diary private - what works for some doesnt work for others. There are a number of threads on this topic. Some may need help with their diet and their diary is closed, negative criticism isnt going to be helpful. If you feel you cant be of help move on to the next person instead of questioning why their diary is private.

    Caloric intake - advice is great except when it comes in a negative form from people who are not MD's. We are all different and again what works for some may not for others. Different ideas are great but not when its worded in a negative way. Your way is not the only way or the right way.

    Mocking threads - Really??? Are we adults or children. I know everyone has a right to say what they want but come on, so childish. We dont have better things to do?

    I know I will get backlash and i will get positive remarks. I also know I have a choice and dont have to read these threads and for the most part have chosen to stay out of them since the other day. These forums could be so much more constructive and helpful. I seen people post how these threads are not what they used to be. It's a damn shame when i read people say they dont normally post because they are afraid of being attacked. That's really sad that people may need help or advice and they cant post a question on here.

    This is why i have the bare minimum of friends on here and dont put up any posts..people (not all) but a good majority of people on here are very nasty and not just about closed diarys....ive seen quite a few posts on here where one person is chastising another for not eating or excercising in the manner they see fit.....

    The best answer is to be accountable to yourself.....get your *kitten* straight, get a food and excercise routine that works for you dont ask your fellow mfp'ers for advice and or help (if u need someone then turn to family or a good friend or heck..ask your doctor!) and use this site to soley track your calories and excercise

    This works for me! lol

Categories