Just joined & need encouragement, not much at home.

zombiebitten
zombiebitten Posts: 5
edited November 12 in Introduce Yourself
I am a mother of four, full time student and severe asthmatic. My youngest is now turning 12 this month and I never returned back to my original weight before having children. I will be 36 this year and feel like I am at my worst. In the last year I have gained almost hundred pounds and it's still climbing. I have trouble being active due to my asthma flaring up so exercising is a bit of a struggle for me. My fiancé is also a huge eater and every time I tell him I need to loose weight he says he will help me and yet he continues to eat three plates full of spaghetti or four hamburgers and makes food that is not exactly healthy for us. My other issue is I get discouraged easily because I have dieted several times and I get down to a certain weight and cannot loose anymore. I am not sure what I am suppose to do.

Replies

  • Andufrene
    Andufrene Posts: 44
    Welcome to MFP! It's a great place for support! Feel free to add me as a friend.
  • bechtel1979
    bechtel1979 Posts: 20
    send me a friend request , i will make sure you meet your goals, have a fantastic day
  • 7funnygirl7
    7funnygirl7 Posts: 1,176
    Welcome, feel free to add me if you like. I am great at giving and also recieving!!
  • jessie1480
    jessie1480 Posts: 132 Member
    So, I completely understand the not so supportive man who says he will help then dosent want turkey burger or anything thatresembles whole grain anything. I am a bit further along in my journey but wool love to help support! Friend me if you would like.
  • justpeachypink
    justpeachypink Posts: 20 Member
    Hi! I'm also brand new to this site, and living in an extremely unsupportive environment. Maybe we can help each other out and try to keep each other motivated? :)
  • vestarocks
    vestarocks Posts: 420 Member
    Welcome. You are in the right place. You can do this. You and your family will be healthier for it. Feel free to add me.
  • shaelataylor
    shaelataylor Posts: 224 Member
    add people ...i hate to speak for everyone but i think were a pretty good group :P maybe even if he doesnt want the healthier option he can fix it for you or you can fix your own. have turkey burgers when they have regular or use 95% lean meat in things. keep working at it and youll get there. its not a fast journey, but its one worth taking :)
  • Kailel
    Kailel Posts: 61 Member
    So, I completely understand the not so supportive man who says he will help then dosent want turkey burger or anything thatresembles whole grain anything. I am a bit further along in my journey but wool love to help support! Friend me if you would like.

    Seconded. (Thirded?) I think if my man had a vegetable he thinks he'd fall over dead... unless french fries are vegetables. :/
  • Purple_Orchid_87
    Purple_Orchid_87 Posts: 517 Member
    the one choice i had to made:

    little portions of 'bad food' - burgers, white pasta, white bread, butter, pizza etc
    OR
    big portions of 'good food' - fruit and veggies (I use frozen), wholewheat foods, plain meat with my own coatings/marinades

    I could either cut down on the amount I ate, and be hungry, or eat LOADS but change WHAT i ate

    I still have the 'bad' food - this weekend is a good example coz I have family visiting

    My diary should be public so feel free to take a wee peek

    a little about me:
    am 24
    female
    6ft tall
    SW 297lbs
    Goal 184lbs
    no children
    office/desk job
  • Savyna
    Savyna Posts: 789 Member
    You can also friend request me if you'd like. Welcome to MFP hope you find the encouragement and support that you need here on this site. Good luck with your weight loss and subsequent healthier lifestyle. :flowerforyou:
  • MamaSonyaP
    MamaSonyaP Posts: 90 Member
    Add me too!
    I'm a mom of three young children (oldest is 4, youngest is 7 mos). My husband is a JUNK FOOD JUNKIE! He likes the results, but doesn't like the new 'healthy approach' to the house. OMG, what will life be like without Doritos??!! Puh-leese!
    Anyway, if anyone else would like to add me, I live in South Western Ontario, am always willing to go for walks or to the parks with kids. Any other moms are welcome to add me!
  • SoozeE512
    SoozeE512 Posts: 439 Member
    Ask your fiance to stop cooking for you and make yourself healthier meals with lots of veggies and whole grains. Stick to natural foods and smaller portions. Show him that you are serious about eating healthy and show him what eating healthy looks like. Tell yourself that you are not going to make your asthma worse by adding any more weight onto your body. Stay strong and stick to it! Once you start losing, he might just want to follow suit and then you'll be able to help each other, but for now, you have to find the courage to say no to his way of eating and do what's best for you.
  • SavageRabidBeast
    SavageRabidBeast Posts: 481 Member
    it's good that you decided to come on here. I am new here also but I am sure you will get great support and motivation here as opposed to at home. You will be able to keep track of your food, exercise, as well as learn new methods, recipes, exercise routines, and all that good stuff. You just need to stay focused and be determined that this is what you wanna do. Others here will help you keep your confidence and motivation up when you feel like you are falling a bit. Best of luck to you!
  • 77tes
    77tes Posts: 8,569 Member
    Welcome! It sounds like you have your plate full, and I don't mean with food. With exercise, remember that a simple walk is better than sitting on the couch munching. I used to blame my skinny hubby for not supporting me, but I finally realized that if I actually had been as active as he was and had eaten the way he did, I would never have gained the weight. I guess my point is that you have to take responsibility for what you eat. Hey, if he's eating 3 plates of pasta, there is less for you.

    BTW, here is a little tip that works for me about portion control. I eat my correct portions and then I pull out a Sudoku book to keep me from eating more.

    Good luck!
  • taliesyn_
    taliesyn_ Posts: 219 Member
    Lots of great support here... add yourself some friends and you will see. We're all here as we're in a similar boat and, like you, we wanted or want to change. Good luck with it - and if you can make some of the tasty dishes people write up here, your OH will perhaps realise that tasty food doesn't have to come from the Golden Arches or DQ!
  • TheFitHooker
    TheFitHooker Posts: 3,357 Member
    First off, WELCOME TO MFP!

    Don't diet! Worse thing I ever done, change your lifestyle! I don't know much about asthma and working out with it, but I'm sure you could start out walking, build yourself up to it. Eventually you'll be able to do more, the more you lose the better you'll get at the work out stuff. Working out is only a small part of losing weight and getting healthy, the biggest part of it is in the kitchen. I started out with portion control and learning to cut myself off. I eventually started taking things off my menu's like fried foods. WATER! Drink lots of water, you need to keep yourself well hydrated and water will help fill you up when you aren't really hungry, it can help determine when you are really hungry or just bored. A lot of people believe they are hungry when they are just bored. So you need to start only eating when you are hungry. A saying I love is "Eat to live, don't live to eat."

    Good luck to you and if you want, you can always add me!
  • cobbie03
    cobbie03 Posts: 3
    Welcome. You just have to keep on keeping on . I too have more than 100lbs to loose its not easy... but remember your doing this for you. Nutrition is 95% of weight lose this I know because I have been trainng for 2years thought just becaus i worked out I could still eat what I wanted. Wrong...so dont worry to much about exersice talk walks play with your kis and you will see as the weight starts to come off you will do better with the excersie just dont give up.
  • confuzzledwife
    confuzzledwife Posts: 142 Member
    Hi, I just wanted to say that I'm an asthmatic also, so I can completely understand where you are coming from. I am in a similar situation, I have 5 kids. My husband, although not overweight, eats nothing but junk food 24/7. He couldn't understand the concept that I wanted to lose weight. It took me a couple of months of doing research, going online and figuring out what I needed to do to lose weight, for example, how many calories I needed to consume to lose weight, what to do about exercising since it's extremely difficult for me to do much for exercise, etc.,

    I decided to start out by just cutting calories with NO exercise, and it actually worked.. I didn't have to give up foods I like I can eat them in moderation as long as they fit into my daily calorie count... . yes, I've had to make cut backs, yes, I've had to limit things, but right now, 9 weeks later, I am down 19 lbs., and I can already breathe better.. I didn't realize losing weight could help my asthma! I have at least 35 more lbs to go and I just added in walking... I can only do 1/2 mile but it's something, I'm hoping eventually as more weight comes off I will be able to add in more exercise... but if not, as long as I'm moving doing something, I'm good.

    Feel free to add me!
  • massageu
    massageu Posts: 4 Member
    Welcome!! You have enough support right here!!!! I use the fitness-pal app on my phone If you would like you can friend me my Email add is InSpireu11@yahoo.com/ username is InSpireme1. Stay encourage, you can do it...
  • w8sarge
    w8sarge Posts: 4,118 Member
    It is hard to keep up your determination, but you can do it! Strategize a bit so you can enjoy some "regular food":

    Weigh or measure a small portion (enter the calories on your log before the meal so you KNOW where you must stop)
    Have a big salad or veggies along with the small portion of richer food
    See what you can do without to stretch the calories (Especially reduce the carbs)
    Get enough protein and fat which make you feel fuller

    Enjoy the progress every day when you track your cals and get the message "If every day were like today, you'd weigh ... in 5 weeks"! That keeps up the determination!
  • DAMNCHARLIE
    DAMNCHARLIE Posts: 569
    I agree there is never much encouragement at home until they turn around and see you have lost 40lbs right before there eyes. I have found plenty of encouragment here on MFP its been unbeliveable. You may add me aswell if you like.
  • krehm0721
    krehm0721 Posts: 4
    Yes, I can totally understand I am neww here too. I just finished my first week on thrusday. I lost 5 lbs and I do my exercise on my own. Just remember any extra moving besides what you normally do is exercise. If you can't exercise than just monitor calories in. You can lose wieght without exercise it just is more difficult because you have to cut the calories. I like to it....so I have cut back calories and exercise and it is working for now but that is because I just started. Feel free to add me as a friend I'll be there for ya
    Good luck...Karey
  • Super_mom
    Super_mom Posts: 185
    Were are kinda in the same boat. I have just started back on my journey and it's been hard. I'm 34, in school and have 4 kids also. My Fiance is sometimes the same way, but he choose to have burgers or fried chicken i always cook something different for myself. I know its hard believe me, but you have to make little steps one day at a time. Please friend me, we can be each others motivation.
  • DeniseChilver
    DeniseChilver Posts: 185 Member
    Hiya, well you have made the 1st step joining here. you will get masses of support and as everyone said all a few friends along the way who will keep u motivated.

    Happy for anyone to add me :-)

    :flowerforyou:
  • ToEKnee213
    ToEKnee213 Posts: 1,031 Member
    Best of luck & feel free to add me :smile:

    You can do this!!!
  • FitChicMelissa
    FitChicMelissa Posts: 2
    I can see the desperation in your note. I help women just like you take back their lives and find freedom from food and live happier and healthier. Check out my website www.FitChicMelissa.com best of luck to you!
  • SteffieMark
    SteffieMark Posts: 1,719 Member
    We can all do this. Support and encouragement is so important. I also cook two meals every night, a nice healthy one for myself and a not as healthy one for my husband and son. They do not realize that I am actually making theirs more healthy too, without them knowing it. lol They both could stand to lose some weight too but, neither seems to care at the moment. Once I lose more, I'm hoping a light bulb will go off in their heads.

    I love the way I'm feeling lately, more like my old self but, I still have quite a way to go. Anyone feel free to add me also, it's easier with friends!
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