help im confused

MFP has already built the calorie deficit into your daily calorie goal which is why you can eat back your exercise calories and still lose weight. That said, as long as you aren't hungry, and are losing pounds, then there's no reason why you "have" to eat those calories back. There will probably come a time, as you get closer to your goal, where you'll find you do need to eat those extra calories in order to continue to lose weight.

Yes you eat back your exercise calories....don't question it just do it. You will lose weight and not have problems with plateaus. Please just do it. I was used to starving myself to lose weight and MFP showed me that that isn't the case. That is how I have made a life style change because I can eat what I want and lose weight.

So if your gonna eat bad its ok as long as you exercise enough to burn those calories? I like that!

My personal opinion is to eat some back. I have found if I go over ~1500 calories in, I'll gain no matter how much exercise I do. So I've adjusted accordingly. So even if I earn back a lot more, I just don't use them if I can avoid it.

In order to lose your goal amount of weight and hit your target caloric deficit you must eat them back. MFP is set up so it ignores your exercise goals when giving you your caloric intake, once you exercise you increase the body's need for energy.

If you went to see a nutritionist they would take into account your planned exercise when assigning calories and will tell you to eat that amount everyday, even if you workout 4 days/week, and the caloric intake will be higher then what MFP gives you. When all is said and done if you follow MFP and eat the cals back your cals for the week would be similar the difference is on MFP you eat more on days you workout and less on days you don't, vs. something in the middle everyday.

As an example say MFP gives you 1450 calories to lose 1 lb/week, and you plan on exercising 5x/week for an average of 400 cals per workout. well MFP will tell you to eat 1450 on the days you don't workout and 1850 on the days you do whereas a "professional" may tell you to eat 1750 everyday regardless if you workout.

So for the week MFP will have you eat 12,150 (1450*2+1850*5) whereas doing it the other way will have you eat 12,250 (1750*7) almost the same number of cals for the week. The issue in not following MFP is if you don't workout the full 5 days or burn more or less than planned. If that is the case you may lose more or less than your goal, whereas MFP will have you lose your goal amount regardless how much you actually workout.

What many MFPers do is take the low 1450 and not eat back exercise calories which is wrong, if you are not eating them back then your daily activity level should reflect the higher burn with would be covered in the 1750/day above.

Just to add in some real world experience, my mfp is set to lose 2 pounds a week. Usually I work out 5 times a week and eat back at least 50% or my exercise calories, and lose about 2 pounds a week. Last week I didn't work out at all so I stuck to the calories MFP gave me and I lost about 2 pounds. So, you know, eat your calories back. It's okay, don't be afraid