Bashing

budhandy
budhandy Posts: 305 Member
in Motivation and Support
It seems this have been a major topic latly about skinny and or fat bashing. Heavy people complain that a skinny person will never understand and skinny people feel they are attacked. Now this is just my opoin but this all this crazy debate needs to stop. I have learned alot from mfp and one of them is to respect. I have friends who are small and large. I am not going to assume what they been through or what battles they have done to become healthy. I think bashing and assuming needs to end. I love my friends large or small. so please stop assuming because that makes an *kitten* out of you and me.

Replies

  • budhandy
    budhandy Posts: 305 Member
    bumping my self...huh that sounds dirty lmao
  • ElementalEscapee
    ElementalEscapee Posts: 552 Member
    Welcome to the human race...
  • honestlysweet
    honestlysweet Posts: 221 Member
    Of course you are right. But unfortunately, on the internet, it happens. It's a cruel place sometimes, kind of like the playground in elementary school. A place that is meant for fun, but is sometimes overrun by bullies. I hope your message gets across.
  • budhandy
    budhandy Posts: 305 Member
    Of course you are right. But unfortunately, on the internet, it happens. It's a cruel place sometimes, kind of like the playground in elementary school. A place that is meant for fun, but is sometimes overrun by bullies. I hope your message gets across.
    I agree
  • budhandy
    budhandy Posts: 305 Member
    Welcome to the human race...
    trust me i know what i want is wishfull thinking
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
    here's what I think, if you wouldn't want someone to say it to your dad, mom, sister, spouse,daughter, son, etc., maybe don't say it yourself, OR if you wouldn't say it face to face, don't say type it, either...
  • MehiraDeOro
    MehiraDeOro Posts: 117 Member
    One of my friends (who is obese) got on my case when I mentioned on a facebook status that I was trying to lose weight. She kept saying, "just focus on being healthy, don't worry about diets. There's nothing wrong with you." She's very condescending when she doesn't agree with what you're doing. Besides how is eating right and exercising NOT healthy? I am overweight, my doctor even said so. She even said my goal weight of 140 was realistic and healthy.

    I really do understand why she's upset, it's frustrating to see smaller people try to lose weight. It just doesn't seem fair that I should have to feel bad for making positive life choices.
  • Scott613
    Scott613 Posts: 2,317 Member
    Wait till the muscle weighs more than fat, eat/ don't eat back exercise calories, and TOM threads start up again. There's more, but we'll cross that river when we get there.
  • Marll
    Marll Posts: 904 Member
    Having been on both sides of the fence I will say this:

    Skinny people that have never been overweight are REALLY annoying when they b!tch about a few pounds here and there, and tend to give off an air that fat people are just lazy and don't want to loose weight.

    Fat people tend to think the skinny person has it easy and doesn't realize that the skinny may have to sacrifice and work a ton to stay where they are at.
  • MamaKeeks
    MamaKeeks Posts: 234
    bumping my self...huh that sounds dirty lmao

    Heh heh heh..... bump!!! lol
  • mama2shi
    mama2shi Posts: 300 Member
    here's what I think, if you wouldn't want someone to say it to your dad, mom, sister, spouse,daughter, son, etc., maybe don't say it yourself, OR if you wouldn't say it face to face, don't say type it, either...

    Aaahhh...how quiet the Internet would be if people would not type what they would never say in person lol. I think that is why I end up ignoring a lot of what people spout off about, I know it is only the fingers talking :)
  • LeanerBeef
    LeanerBeef Posts: 1,432 Member
    Put a shirt on......
  • bigredhearts
    bigredhearts Posts: 428

    Skinny people that have never been overweight are REALLY annoying when they b!tch about a few pounds here and there

    this is isnt really a fair statement. you dont personally know how they view themselves so to say that its annoying is hurtful to those with and without weight issues. everyone has self-esteem and without knowing exactly how they feel or living every moment of thier lives, saying a persons unhappiness with themselves is annoying is neither helpful nor positive. we are all beautiful, but we dont all see ourselves that way.
  • Marll
    Marll Posts: 904 Member

    Skinny people that have never been overweight are REALLY annoying when they b!tch about a few pounds here and there

    this is isnt really a fair statement. you dont personally know how they view themselves so to say that its annoying is hurtful to those with and without weight issues. everyone has self-esteem and without knowing exactly how they feel or living every moment of thier lives, saying a persons unhappiness with themselves is annoying is neither helpful nor positive. we are all beautiful, but we dont all see ourselves that way.

    I guess I wasn't clear in my tone, what I am saying is that to a fat person the skinny person is annoying. They may have their own issues that they are working through, but when you have 100+ to loose and someone is complaining about 3lbs, it just seems trivial.
  • bigredhearts
    bigredhearts Posts: 428

    Skinny people that have never been overweight are REALLY annoying when they b!tch about a few pounds here and there

    this is isnt really a fair statement. you dont personally know how they view themselves so to say that its annoying is hurtful to those with and without weight issues. everyone has self-esteem and without knowing exactly how they feel or living every moment of thier lives, saying a persons unhappiness with themselves is annoying is neither helpful nor positive. we are all beautiful, but we dont all see ourselves that way.

    I guess I wasn't clear in my tone, what I am saying is that to a fat person the skinny person is annoying. They may have their own issues that they are working through, but when you have 100+ to loose and someone is complaining about 3lbs, it just seems trivial.

    and maybe to some heavier people thats true, but not to all. and it may seem trivial, but believe me when i tell you, its not. the way a person views themselves is vitally important in regards to mental and physical health. i would never say it were trivial to a person who struggles with body image and because of that has an eating disorder. i know its hard not to judge, but thats the message the OP is trying to get across. that we dont know the battles each of us face, or what steps we do or dont take in regard to our health, so the bashing of people needs to stop. we need to love ourselves, and others, for who we are as individuals.
  • rinnylin
    rinnylin Posts: 5
    I really understand your situation. My friend is the same way. When I mentioned finding low cal recipes she said I was obsessed and would end up bulimic.
  • budhandy
    budhandy Posts: 305 Member
    Put a shirt on......
    Stay on topic
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
    here's what I think, if you wouldn't want someone to say it to your dad, mom, sister, spouse,daughter, son, etc., maybe don't say it yourself, OR if you wouldn't say it face to face, don't say type it, either...

    Aaahhh...how quiet the Internet would be if people would not type what they would never say in person lol. I think that is why I end up ignoring a lot of what people spout off about, I know it is only the fingers talking :)

    I guess we can agree to disagree. We can convey our message without being nasty to each other. Some just get out of control, because they think they are big and bad hiding behind a monitor.
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
    Put a shirt on......

    Hey now, that is NOT nice at ALL. Please show the OP some respect. This is (supposed to be) a supportive FITNESS site. Thank you.
  • vim_n_vigor
    vim_n_vigor Posts: 4,089 Member
    Wait till the muscle weighs more than fat, eat/ don't eat back exercise calories, and TOM threads start up again. There's more, but we'll cross that river when we get there.

    Good point. I haven't seen as many TOM threads lately. I guess I would still take them over all the bashing threads going on lately. I have been on both sides. Both have their perks and downfalls. There are unpleasant people of all sizes.
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
    Wait till the muscle weighs more than fat, eat/ don't eat back exercise calories, and TOM threads start up again. There's more, but we'll cross that river when we get there.

    Good point. I haven't seen as many TOM threads lately. I guess I would still take them over all the bashing threads going on lately. I have been on both sides. Both have their perks and downfalls. There are unpleasant people of all sizes.


    I agree. I would much sooner see TOM threads (as annoying as they are) than one more bashing thread.
  • vim_n_vigor
    vim_n_vigor Posts: 4,089 Member

    Skinny people that have never been overweight are REALLY annoying when they b!tch about a few pounds here and there

    this is isnt really a fair statement. you dont personally know how they view themselves so to say that its annoying is hurtful to those with and without weight issues. everyone has self-esteem and without knowing exactly how they feel or living every moment of thier lives, saying a persons unhappiness with themselves is annoying is neither helpful nor positive. we are all beautiful, but we dont all see ourselves that way.

    I guess I wasn't clear in my tone, what I am saying is that to a fat person the skinny person is annoying. They may have their own issues that they are working through, but when you have 100+ to loose and someone is complaining about 3lbs, it just seems trivial.

    When I was at my ideal weight, not watching those last three pounds turned into the last 5 pounds, 10, 20 and now over 70. None of it is trivial. Why be upset that someone has either worked to get to that point or to stay at that point while the larger person didn't bother, didn't exercise, didn't watch calories? The larger person was just as able to stay the smaller size as the smaller person. They just didn't do it. I am lumped in with 'they' here.

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