Lack of Support at home/Need to vent

I had no support either at the beginning - in fact he suddenly began bringing him donuts and candy bars, etc. He would say "oh, you can have a bite of this.." but, here is the fact. I kept at it. I didn't make him change anything. I fixed him his same foods but made my healthier stuff. I continued at it and didn't complain about what he was eating and just kept at it. About a year into it, he seemed to realize it wasn't a fad. He drove me to my first race. that afternoon he said he could eat whole wheat pasta so I didn't have to fix two kinds. Then he began saying he could eat more of what I was eating. He supported me in more races. He stopped bringing home crap. For Valentine's day he bought me the Garmin I wanted. For my birthday he bought me a bike and now he wants to ride it. It was a very slow and steady progress but now that I've lost 80+ pounds and am running and biking, he is not only supportive of me but wants to make changes in himself.

Changes in one spouse scares the heck out of the other person. They fear that the comfortable status quo will change. They fear their newly changed spouse whether the changes are intellectual (going back to college) or physical (fitness). We marry someone in theory because we love them that way and when they begin to make changes that can really upset the apple cart. It is important to let our partner know that we are doing the changes for ourselves and because we want to be able to share an even better life with them....that we love them and that they are not in danger. We encourage them slowly and gently to grow WITH us so that together we can be the best we can be.... but sometimes we just need to give them time to process these changes and get comfortable with these new things and not try to brow beat them into accepting. Try to be gentle and not uproot them too much as they see our example and see that we aren't going anywhere.... different people handle change differently -some will get *****y, cranky, sarcastic; some will get hurt and silent; some will just take the challenge and jump in. But over it all, keep loving them but keep loving yourself and know that you are worth it and you don't need the other person's support to do it - you can do it all by yourself and just hope that eventually he will catch up with you and realize that you aren't going anywhere and you love him, regardless of your body shape.

Maybe he is afraid that if you get fit you will leave him. Just ignore his comments and go about you business. As far as the eatting healthy, if you do the shopping and the cooking then he will have to eat what you make. If he doesn't want to eat what you cook then tell him to cook his own. You and your kids can eat healthy. Good luck with your journey!! Hang in there I'm syre after a while things will get better.