Venting session

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hasiangirl
hasiangirl Posts: 1,613
in Health and Weight Loss
So i like to think that i'm pretty laid back and i dont get mad about much. It could just be that i'm about to start my TOM in a week and the week before i have really bad mood swings and crave lots of foods....well anyway its 10:50 am and I have lunch ready for my son and I....my BF's mom walks in and goes "You asians eat early." WTF is that...i know she's prob kidding but after hearing "You asians do... ______ add anything that doesnt fit into her daily norm. err well its starting to get under my skin now... and then i go on to try to explain why i'm eating at 10:50am now and she just walks away while i'm in mid sentence...to me thats just plain rude..goodness i'm mad lol anyway so i wake up at 5-6am i eat right when i wake up and then eat every 3 hours after today i woke up late with my son at 7:30am so instead of having a snack at 11 because i like to have my lunch before noon....so dinner can be before six.....i ate lunch instead...is that crazy? to me that seems sensible....*irritated as all _____ bad word*

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  • SDawgW
    SDawgW Posts: 160 Member
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    Wow...she just earned herself a pair of socks for her next birthday. :wink:

    The comment she made re: race is beyond ignorant. I can't even get started on that because I wouldn't be able to curb my profanities when it comes to that, regardless of whether she was kidding or not.

    PLUS....who gives a rat's patootie WHAT TIME of day you eat lunch???? The fact that you're eating healthy and giving your child healthy meals is the only thing that matters. You need not justify it to her, to us, or to anyone but yourself :flowerforyou:
  • FireMonkey
    FireMonkey Posts: 500 Member
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    Chalk it off to ignorance on her part. Every time I do something different it's "oh, that must be a German thing". And then when my mother visits me in Canada, everything she sees "is that what Canadians do?" Sometimes you can educate somebody if they have a "teachable moment" but if not, it's not worth ruining your day over it.
  • Wecandothis
    Wecandothis Posts: 1,083 Member
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    Argh. It's a mother in law thing. :-(

    Yep she was rude!!!! In a rather passive aggressive way. The only thing I can tell you is something that has helped me tremendously with passive aggression - which I never understood. And that is to just very gently but directly counter it with how it made you feel.

    If she says something like that to you again, perhaps counter it with, "Wow. That made me really uncomfortable saying 'you Asians'. It makes me sad when you say that"

    It's hard. I'm still learning. But if she is forced to be confronted with the gentle truth it will disarm her completely.

    Good luck. And I'm sorry that had to happen to you. :( I pray your mother in law's eyes be open to the truth.
  • swtally80
    swtally80 Posts: 278 Member
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    Ooooo... How frustrating! That would make me want revenge especially the week before TOM (I have pmdd). Maybe @ dinner time you should say something like us asians enjoy rice with our dinner I am curious if old people do too! Or some other you old people sure _____ (insert any acivity) a lot. Good luck having her around don't let a crappy attitude like that bring you down!
  • BrendaLee
    BrendaLee Posts: 4,463 Member
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    I LOVE people who can't mind their own business. :smile:
  • keiko
    keiko Posts: 2,919 Member
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    I eat my lunch at 11am everyday. I'm part Italian, French & Swede and born in the USA. What would she have to say to me?

    Some people are just rude. I guess she's one of them.
  • hasiangirl
    hasiangirl Posts: 1,613
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    I eat my lunch at 11am everyday. I'm part Italian, French & Swede and born in the USA. What would she have to say to me?

    Some people are just rude. I guess she's one of them.
    lol i didnt think lunch at 11am was too early lol...glad im not the only one who eats earlier on.... and i'm only half korean the other half is a big huge mix of everything lol.....

    and she is nice, but i dunno how to explain it...like she'll say the rudest comment in the sweetest tone with such a sincere smile that sometimes u cant tell if she realizes what she said was rude and inconsiderate...its just so hard to be rude back to someone who looks so happy and sweet in sincere :laugh: im pretty much over it now, but phew i was upset earlier

    thank u all so much for listening to me rant :smile:
  • czewwhat
    czewwhat Posts: 8,715
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    I run a daycare, the USDA requires we have meals for our kids no more than three hours apart for the child's best nutritional standpoint. since kids catch a school bus at 7:30 breakfast at no later than 7:00am snack no later than 10am lunch is served at 11:30, snack just does not hold them for 3 hours. Nap after lunch, then snack again as soon as they wake from nap usually 2:30pm. The only reason I don't have to serve dinner too is because the parents are picking them up and at least 20 minutes to consume a meal is also a requirement!

    It is the law for me!

    You Asians! next time she says that say " That is so true! Us Asians have much longer lifespans than you
    ." fill in the blank. Maybe that is why!
  • shaleah77
    shaleah77 Posts: 89
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    Wow...she just earned herself a pair of socks for her next birthday. :wink:


    YES!!!!!!! A pair of socks and a matching flashlight ....just to make her wonder :tongue:

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • ilike2moveit
    ilike2moveit Posts: 776 Member
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    Very rude! Funny, I eat my lunch at that time too.
  • yessie75
    yessie75 Posts: 152
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    I teach Kindergarten and we eat lunch at 11:15 am. We also have a snack at 9:30 am. I follow the same schedule when I'm home or I get the "shakes" :laugh:
  • Georg
    Georg Posts: 1,728 Member
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    I'm so sorry some of you have such difficult in laws. I used to. Not anymore, but I remember the hurt crushed feelings.
    Sometimes a simple "I hope you didn't mean that to sound so bad...." helps keep my sister on track.
  • patns
    patns Posts: 7 Member
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    Sometimes a simple "I hope you didn't mean that to sound so bad...." helps keep my sister on track.

    That would be a very appropriate response. You could fill in whatever you wanted in place of "bad". she was likely talking without thinking. If you said something like this quote and put in "racist" it would alert her that she is inappropriate.

    I have taught in elementary school for years and lunch is at 11:20.

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