Thoughts about friends and staying motivated

mandapanda001
mandapanda001 Posts: 370 Member
in Motivation and Support
I just had to see what others thought about some things I am going through in my life that are affecting staying on track and being motivated with my eating and exercising that has to deal with my friends. I have two friends who are excluding me a lot lately and now they have become BFF's. I am fine with others hanging out without me it is just that when I ask one friend to do something more times than not its a no and then I see on facebook or hear about the two of them hanging out without me. It is starting to make me feel awful and like there is something wrong with me. I should know better because I am in my 30's and don't want to come across as the are we still in high school attitude. It is just hard for me because one of my friends has been my best friend since high school. I am not into confrontation but just at a loss on how to deal with the situation. I have tried to be honest in the past but it just blows up in my face (I have been told not to be jealous and that they don't exclude me on purpose)....should I try to salvage my friendships or just move on? Any thoughts...

Replies

  • Toddrific
    Toddrific Posts: 1,114 Member
    I think the more you think about it the worse it'll be. Just ease back and hang with other friends. Even better, use the time you would have spent hanging out...at the gym ;) Then you'll be all buff and can kick their bums if it comes to it, at the same time!
  • TheMrs1006
    TheMrs1006 Posts: 11 Member
    I have been in the same situation and honestly if it is a constant thing that happens just move on. I certainly did and I try not to think much about it.
  • cloud2011
    cloud2011 Posts: 898 Member
    This has happened to me, and I'm in my 40s. Seems like life is just like high school after all. Except, you can now take positive action for yourself. Why not stay friends with them, but start pursuing some other interests and even friends aside from them?

    That way, you can make yourself feel better and you haven't written them off. Give it time, see if you feel like hanging out again later, but also try some new things for yourself.

    I've had to back off a few friendships. I'm still friends with the person, but we don't get together as often. One friend is just always too busy, so I decided to try every so often. Sometimes we can get together, other times not.
  • Jenph20
    Jenph20 Posts: 134 Member
    I think everyone goes through this situation every now and then. Sometimes friendships change and sometimes you arent made to be friends at this time, but maybe it will work out later on. I say give them space and do your own thing. make some new friends and enjoy life. dont dwell on it :) maybe they will come back...and you knwo the friendship was meant to be, if not you have your own new life to enjoy :)
  • karyngrace
    karyngrace Posts: 105 Member
    speaking from experience I've found the best thing to do in that situation is just to go about your own life, spend time with people who love and support you and leave your friends to their own devices.
    if they come back to you and you still want to be friends with them, great!! if not they were never real friends to begin with!!
  • mandapanda001
    mandapanda001 Posts: 370 Member
    Thanks everyone, I agree with all of you. I am starting to feel better and vowing to move on and enjoy my happiness and not dwell on the negative. Thanks again!

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