A funny but not so funny question Part II
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sgtinvincible
Posts: 2,559
So yesterday this topic stirred up many in the community, due to a provocative question: Would you rather be overweight and very attractive, or thin and unattractive?
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/10531-funny-but-not-so-funny-question?page=1
As I read through the responses, I actually started to wonder how people felt about the other side of the coin: Would you rather be in a relationship with someone who was overweight and attractive or thin and unattractive?
First though, I want to lay down a few ground rules. Yesterdays topic became a bit heated, and had the potential to turn into a flame war (I know I had to restrain myself to the point that I eventually had to just walk away from the topic). Please remember that we are a community of people with a similar interest - Losing weight . Please don't lash out at anyone personally. Everyone has a valid opinion. Keep an open mind. Keep in mind that we are all here in order to support one another. That's what makes this community great. Respect one another. The last thing, is that justifying provocative statements by saying that's 'just the way I am' is a very effective way of undermining your own credibility. Contribute. Don't detract.
Ok with that said (sorry, I just felt it needed to be addressed), what do you think?
If you had to be in a relationship for the rest of your life, would you rather your signifigant be overweight and attractive, or thin and unattractive (or even ugly)? To take it even further, would you rather be with someone who is beautiful on the outside and just plain mean to others, or with someone who is overweight, rather homely and who treats people like gold?
No wrong answers! Discuss!!! :bigsmile:
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/10531-funny-but-not-so-funny-question?page=1
As I read through the responses, I actually started to wonder how people felt about the other side of the coin: Would you rather be in a relationship with someone who was overweight and attractive or thin and unattractive?
First though, I want to lay down a few ground rules. Yesterdays topic became a bit heated, and had the potential to turn into a flame war (I know I had to restrain myself to the point that I eventually had to just walk away from the topic). Please remember that we are a community of people with a similar interest - Losing weight . Please don't lash out at anyone personally. Everyone has a valid opinion. Keep an open mind. Keep in mind that we are all here in order to support one another. That's what makes this community great. Respect one another. The last thing, is that justifying provocative statements by saying that's 'just the way I am' is a very effective way of undermining your own credibility. Contribute. Don't detract.
Ok with that said (sorry, I just felt it needed to be addressed), what do you think?
If you had to be in a relationship for the rest of your life, would you rather your signifigant be overweight and attractive, or thin and unattractive (or even ugly)? To take it even further, would you rather be with someone who is beautiful on the outside and just plain mean to others, or with someone who is overweight, rather homely and who treats people like gold?
No wrong answers! Discuss!!! :bigsmile:
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Replies
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So yesterday this topic stirred up many in the community, due to a provocative question: Would you rather be overweight and very attractive, or thin and unattractive?
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/10531-funny-but-not-so-funny-question?page=1
As I read through the responses, I actually started to wonder how people felt about the other side of the coin: Would you rather be in a relationship with someone who was overweight and attractive or thin and unattractive?
First though, I want to lay down a few ground rules. Yesterdays topic became a bit heated, and had the potential to turn into a flame war (I know I had to restrain myself to the point that I eventually had to just walk away from the topic). Please remember that we are a community of people with a similar interest - Losing weight . Please don't lash out at anyone personally. Everyone has a valid opinion. Keep an open mind. Keep in mind that we are all here in order to support one another. That's what makes this community great. Respect one another. The last thing, is that justifying provocative statements by saying that's 'just the way I am' is a very effective way of undermining your own credibility. Contribute. Don't detract.
Ok with that said (sorry, I just felt it needed to be addressed), what do you think?
If you had to be in a relationship for the rest of your life, would you rather your signifigant be overweight and attractive, or thin and unattractive (or even ugly)? To take it even further, would you rather be with someone who is beautiful on the outside and just plain mean to others, or with someone who is overweight, rather homely and who treats people like gold?
No wrong answers! Discuss!!! :bigsmile:0 -
honestly the weight doesnt really effect my choice in men i have dated thin and chubby and ugly and good looking ..... its all in the second part of the question that determines if i like someone, its what is on the inside that counts.....0
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I would rather be thin and unattractive, and I'd rather be with someone overweight.... I like big guys lol I can't help it!0
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Thin and unattractive for his healths sake0
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I just re-read the post from yesterday. Thank heavens I was at Happy Hour the whole time the posting wars happened!0
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To me it doesn't matter what they look like. I look for similar values that I have and that is what I want in the person that I have in my life. Kind, honest, compassionate to others, someone that makes me smile and knows how to have a conversation. Someone that treats me as their equal and accepts me as I am.
oh and pretty eyes.... I am a sucker for pretty eyes LOL That would be the only thing that all of the men that I have had relationships with have in common. Is pretty eyes :laugh: Otherwise height and weight and looks even color of hair have been all over the board.0 -
thin and ugly....... because personality is more important to me than my partners looks, and I want my man to be alive and healthy for a long long time!0
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Well, sgtinvincible.......(should I call you Mr. Smooth?:bigsmile: ) since you are going to keep this one alive.....IMHO:
This is a question that I believe should be asked with the intention to make people THINK....and not really answer to anyone but themselves. Because everyone IS entitled to their own opinion, and opinions can be HURTful with the diversity of people in this world, some opinions are better left unspoken.
Is this not: a question that is really impossible to answer without offending someone? Everyday we face the judgements and opinions of others. I come here for support, to "get away" from the less than desirable aspects of the world, (but certainly not to pretend there isn't awful things happening), and I certainly don't like to read that someone is offending another because they prefer one look or type over another.
Living in a perfect world, everyone would choose the humane response over any other answer. Such a conundrum that humane stems from the word humanity, yet the fact that it does, says something about how we should look at life?
Why then is it seemingly embedded in human nature to be attracted to beauty? I think you know the answer to that one, don't you? It isn't shallowness, or selfishness. Go hiking again....why are we drawn to beauty? Being obsessed with it to the point of destruction, is shallowness on the other hand.
What exactly are most the different philosophies views on obsession?
Just my thoughts, and my answer.0 -
Well, to answer that, I was 140 pounds when I met my husband (engaged 27 days later). I was 180 pounds when we married 18 months later....managed to get down to 140 two years later, but from then on averaged 180-200 pounds. We celebrate our 22nd anniversary this year so I would have to feel that overweight and attractive works for us...although, as you know...I really, really want to be slimmer and attractive.....
I can tell you though, my hubby would gently say to me that he is worried about my health and if I would like him to join me for walks or cut out desserts that would be good (for us) ...he is the same weight of course as when we met.
Karen0 -
Wow... I ignored that other post b/c some sort of tongue lashing was going to be made by moi but now I have to reply......So yesterday this topic stirred up many in the community, due to a provocative question: Would you rather be overweight and very attractive, or thin and unattractive?
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/10531-funny-but-not-so-funny-question?page=1
As I read through the responses, I actually started to wonder how people felt about the other side of the coin: Would you rather be in a relationship with someone who was overweight and attractive or thin and unattractive?
First though, I want to lay down a few ground rules. Yesterdays topic became a bit heated, and had the potential to turn into a flame war (I know I had to restrain myself to the point that I eventually had to just walk away from the topic). Please remember that we are a community of people with a similar interest - Losing weight . Please don't lash out at anyone personally. Everyone has a valid opinion. Keep an open mind. Keep in mind that we are all here in order to support one another. That's what makes this community great. Respect one another. The last thing, is that justifying provocative statements by saying that's 'just the way I am' is a very effective way of undermining your own credibility. Contribute. Don't detract.
Ok with that said (sorry, I just felt it needed to be addressed), what do you think?
If you had to be in a relationship for the rest of your life, would you rather your signifigant be overweight and attractive, or thin and unattractive (or even ugly)? To take it even further, would you rather be with someone who is beautiful on the outside and just plain mean to others, or with someone who is overweight, rather homely and who treats people like gold?
No wrong answers! Discuss!!! :bigsmile:
I would choose someone who is overweight and treats people like gold... but then again... I can care less about appearance. It doesn't matter if you're overweight, skinny... inbetween... if you treat people like $h!t.. you will make yourself out to be the ugliest person ever.
~Joanna:flowerforyou:0 -
I was married 10yrs to Mr Vain........and he was a good looking man. He had several mirrors and never a hair out of place. But he was very verbally abusive. And cheated with several women and would actually tell me in detail what they did. I was suicidal then and it takes more then looks , fat , skinny, ugly or handsome for me to want me to marry again. He would have to believe and saved in God. And treat me like I am the one and only one he loves no matter what I look like. When ever I would gain weight my husband would leave me, and come back when I had lost the weight. You ever heard the song.." You Don't Impress Me None"? Well Looks has nothing at all to do with what I would be interested in. Don't get me wrong........if he looked like Freddy Kruger or how ever it is spelled , then that's to freakin ugly. That's all I got to say about that!
Just wanted to add to this .........I love everyone here, I couldn't do this without yous
For me it is a matter of live or death and I am trying to choose life now.:flowerforyou: 0 -
Well, sgtinvincible.......(should I call you Mr. Smooth?:bigsmile: ) since you are going to keep this one alive.....IMHO:
This is a question that I believe should be asked with the intention to make people THINK....and not really answer to anyone but themselves. Because everyone IS entitled to their own opinion, and opinions can be HURTful with the diversity of people in this world, some opinions are better left unspoken.
Hmm....Mr. Smooth....I like that....
Pom, that really is my intention, to make people think....after reading through the responses (and you know how I feel about this question, as I believe I made it pretty clear in my responses in the other thread) I really think that people should examine their opinions on this in an honest manner. Why exactly is it that we as a society are so programmed to follow a particular idealization of beauty? I think to answer that we need to look deep inside ourselves and give ourselves an honest answer as to our own idealization of beauty.
Just my 2 cents. :bigsmile:0 -
I was married 10yrs to Mr Vain........and he was a good looking man. He had several mirrors and never a hair out of place. But he was very verbally abusive. And cheated with several women and would actually tell me in detail what they did. I was suicidal then and it takes more then looks , fat , skinny, ugly or handsome for me to want me to marry again. He would have to believe and saved in God. And treat me like I am the one and only one he loves no matter what I look like. When ever I would gain weight my husband would leave me, and come back when I had lost the weight. You ever heard the song.." You Don't Impress Me None"? Well Looks has nothing at all to do with what I would be interested in. Don't get me wrong........if he looked like Freddy Kruger or how ever it is spelled , then that's to freakin ugly. That's all I got to say about that!
Just wanted to add to this .........I love everyone here, I couldn't do this without yous For me it is a matter of live or death and I am trying to choose life now.:flowerforyou:
Aunt Karen, you're a pretty boffo dame, the bee's knees, the cat's meow! (not sure why I just resorted to 30's lingo...anyway...:indifferent: )
I know a little of what you mean. Looks are definately not paramount next to a good heart. The next Mrs. Jones will have to be a pretty special person to hack her way to my heart. 0 -
Give me a chubby hubby and I'll be his weighted wife!
Well, half the equation, hubby isn't chubby - but he's the best!0 -
I was married 10yrs to Mr Vain........and he was a good looking man. He had several mirrors and never a hair out of place. But he was very verbally abusive. And cheated with several women and would actually tell me in detail what they did. I was suicidal then and it takes more then looks , fat , skinny, ugly or handsome for me to want me to marry again. He would have to believe and saved in God. And treat me like I am the one and only one he loves no matter what I look like. When ever I would gain weight my husband would leave me, and come back when I had lost the weight. You ever heard the song.." You Don't Impress Me None"? Well Looks has nothing at all to do with what I would be interested in. Don't get me wrong........if he looked like Freddy Kruger or how ever it is spelled , then that's to freakin ugly. That's all I got to say about that!
Just wanted to add to this .........I love everyone here, I couldn't do this without yous For me it is a matter of live or death and I am trying to choose life now.:flowerforyou:
Aunt Karen, you're a pretty boffo dame, the bee's knees, the cat's meow! (not sure why I just resorted to 30's lingo...anyway...:indifferent: )
I know a little of what you mean. Looks are definately not paramount next to a good heart. The next Mrs. Jones will have to be a pretty special person to hack her way to my heart.
:blushing: beauty in the beholder of the :'s 0 -
Weight does not come into play when I choose someone. I look for the person they are inside, though I do have to admit I like chubbier guys. Just my preference!!!0
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I really hope that none of us are so shallow that we are limited to just these two qualities or options rather than considering who the person as a whole.
So, if you are asking what I think (because you say you are asking the question to get people to think), here goes: I think the amount of time I spent replying was probably better spent doing something else - like working out or writing a shopping list full of healthy and nutritious food.
But I did it anyway against my better judgement.:huh:0
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