Just need to vent & need some encouragement!

Hi guys! I don't want to complain but I just need to vent and need some encouragement!
I am 95% vegan and have lost 33 lbs in the past 6 months counting calories & exercising! I have finally reached my goal weight of 135 lbs (I am 5'5) and I am very proud of myself!
However, this past weekend I blew it! I partied a lot and ate everything! I exceeded 2000 calories Friday, Saturday (most likely got closer to 3000 on this day), Sunday, Monday, and today! My hunger has been ridiculous - I have not been able to stop eating! You can view my diary and see my progress overtime.
I lost most of the weight sticking to 1200 calories then I just increased my calories to 1500-1800 to maintain my weight. It's just these past few days I have totally fell off the wagon! Today I told myself I would get back in but then I just ate 2300 calories today and my stomach is so full but I can't fight this hunger!
As you can see, I eat mostly all fruits and vegetables. However, I haven't eaten that many calories on a daily basis!
I am just upset and frustrated and depressed. Now I have to work off those 5 lbs I probably gained. I am very mad at myself! I didn't want to gain weight right before bikini season! What is wrong with me?
Thank you for reading - just need to write this out!!
It is only 8:30 at night and I have already consumed 2300 calories and only walked on the treadmill for 30 minutes and did the cross-trainer for 15 minutes! It was not a good workout - I haven't felt very good lately!
Haven't exercised, ate like a pig, and drank excessively!! Very mad!! I don't want to be big again!

Replies

  • moepwr
    moepwr Posts: 335 Member
    Happens to the best of us! Congrats on reaching your goal weight. Tomorrow is another day and another opportunity for a fresh start. Good luck!
  • alaska11
    alaska11 Posts: 151
    Tomorrow is a new day! Stop beating yourself up and move on. The longer you stay mad at yourself the more stressed you will be. The more stressed you are the more you will eat. You may be surprised and not have gained as much back as you thought. Six months ago you would continue to eat like that but now you know better.

    Time to move on!!!!
  • sailorgirl4561
    sailorgirl4561 Posts: 2 Member
    I know how you feel, relapses happen. I have had them myself when it comes to eating sweets too much. I have joined this site since it has way more specifics than fitbit and with the hope that it will motivate me to lose the 15 to 20 pounds I have gained in the past six months.
  • Hood25
    Hood25 Posts: 201 Member
    You have done a great job to get to your goal weight! Your next challenge is to find a maintenance plan that works for you. It is experiement time. I would suggest protein shakes to get you feeling more full. Next go buy a magazine that you like and look at all the spring and summer fashions etc. and get your mind back in the game. You have approached a huge transition time and your not going to blow it! I'd say your metabolism is a little shocked by the past few days and you probably haven't hurt yourself as much as you think. Join a DVD group or something to help you be accountable for your exercise. Get your head out of the panic zone and get your game plan ready and you will be fine! If you can make it through this....and you can!..you will be a long time success!!!
  • Usbornegal
    Usbornegal Posts: 601 Member
    Perhaps your body is looking for nutrients it is not getting and driving you to food to find it. Super track yourself and see if you are getting enough protein, iron and vitamins.
  • Wow! Thank you all so much for the support! You all made me feel better. I have to keep reminding myself that what I eat and how I exercise isn't a 'diet' - it is a lifestyle... I can't survive the rest of my life being strict 24/7 without a few days here and there that are off-track. I go off-track every weekend and still lost the 33 lbs but I was just stressed because I did it longer then just the weekend!
    I really do think I must be missing out on some kind of vitamins and minerals. I am finding that if I do not consume between 1600-1800 calories everyday I get shaky and moody and feel sick. It must be what my body needs!
    What is really weird is that even though I pigged out all weekend (and last night consumed 400 calories when I got home from work at midnight) I was 2 lbs lighter this morning? Maybe this increase is calories is getting my metabolism going? I am just finding that I am so hungry no matter what I do. However, I wasn't even hungry when I got home from work last night - I have to check and see if I am hypogylcemic. I kept waking up with a jolt every time I started falling asleep and I was dizzy and anxious - I went downstairs and had a special K fruit crisp (100 calories) then 2 big handfuls of Kashi cereal (300 calories) and then I was able to go to sleep. That brought my caloric intake for the day up to 1800 calories and I slept like a baby.
    Now it is so much harder for me to lower my calories after eating almost 3000 calories for 4 days in a row! My metabolism must be on fire because I am STARVING. To the point of being ravenous!
    I can't tell you all how much I appreciate your comments and your support! This is why I joined this place - you are all great! Good luck on your goals :)