The Breakup Club

while me and my wife were separated I lost a lot of weight. seemed like long walks and working out were the only things that made me feel any sort of peace. good luck with your's

Currently in the middle of a divorce. We knew each other more than 7 years, were married for over 3...

I keep losing weight (even though I eat a ton and am actually trying to gain a bit back) and I know it's stress-related.

Still, just try to make healthy choices regarding what you eat and how you move. When there are so many things outside of your control, take control of what you CAN - the choices you make.

My divorce diet was funny and VERY unhealthy, but it really got me started:

Morning: 6 egg whites, whole wheat tortilla, green salsa.
Lunch: Lean Cuisine

Gym: weight training

Dinner: Lean Cuisine, 3 bottles of wine, and 2 or 3 cran & Vodka at the bar, and a pack of cigarettes.

Wake up in the morning and do it again. Everyday.

This went on for about 2 years. But, it worked.

LOL. It was a tough gig, but I survived.

Don't do what I did. It really makes everything way more difficult. :-x

Wow... our divorce's were shockingly similar... minus the salsa.

Every day??? I don't think I drink 3 bottles of wine in a year!!!

Clearly, you don't understand what it takes to be dedicated to your cause...

A year ago i was almost 220lbs, my husband cheated on me when we almost turn 7 years married, i forgive him but in our aniversary he tell me that he don't love me anymore and he want to be free. I grab my son and my stuff and i move back to my hometown. I decide that he won't bring me down even if hurts at the beginning. Now i'm 176lbs and i feel wonderful. I try every day harder to become a better person in every way. I'm living in the future!!

“That’s the best revenge of all: happiness. Nothing drives people crazier than seeing someone have a good ****ing life.” - Chuck Palahniuk

The song that gets me through it all....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jZMQ0OKVO80&list=UUeorj4gQq9KLidnoC-XCbCQ&index=6&feature=plpp_video

Me too. 4 1/2 years and he left me for another woman. If you need to talk I'm here. It's rough.... ****ty part is he is still involved in my daily life and I have to see that b$@tch on his side...

It's life I suppose.

Hi all, was just dumped after 5.5 years (first boyfriend, too), and while i understand why he did it, I certainly don't feel the same way and am really hurt that I no longer made him feel as happy as he made me feel. Am bouncing between shock, heartbreak, anger, understanding, hoping he changes his mind, trying to look forward to being single (which I've never really been before), shock, denial, anger.... and lots and lots of tears. There's this vague hope that we'll one day get back together, but I suspect the reality is that if it DID happen (which is such a huge DID) it would happen in a few years, not a few weeks or months, and I'm starting to realize I can't wait. If it happens, it happens, but I can't WAIT and I can't EXPECT IT or LOOK FORWARD to it. If we ever get back together, we'll need to be different people at a different point in our lives.

I've decided to give myself two months (so, june 1st) to pamper myself, lose the weight I gained, etc. before even thinking about going out & wanting to meet someone. I'm debating splurging on a gym membership (or getting a cheap one just for the elliptical) and am also putting a bit of money aside for small pampering things. This week, I fixed my bike so I can bike to work. Next week, a mani/pedi. The week after that, maybe something from sephora? and every time I hit a weight loss goal (5 pounds at a time) I will get a cute, cheap item of clothing.

I have 12 - 15 pounds to lose, and I know I should focus on 1 pound a week, but I so desperately want to fast forward through this. I feel absolutely empty right now and can't concentrate on work, friends, family, etc. He really was everything.

How are you guys pampering yourselves outside of eating well and working out? Now, I guess, is the time to have fun with at-home beautifying things. Hair, skin, bath salts, makeup, creams, etc. Any suggestions?

Hi all, was just dumped after 5.5 years (first boyfriend, too), and while i understand why he did it, I certainly don't feel the same way and am really hurt that I no longer made him feel as happy as he made me feel. Am bouncing between shock, heartbreak, anger, understanding, hoping he changes his mind, trying to look forward to being single (which I've never really been before), shock, denial, anger.... and lots and lots of tears. There's this vague hope that we'll one day get back together, but I suspect the reality is that if it DID happen (which is such a huge DID) it would happen in a few years, not a few weeks or months, and I'm starting to realize I can't wait. If it happens, it happens, but I can't WAIT and I can't EXPECT IT or LOOK FORWARD to it. If we ever get back together, we'll need to be different people at a different point in our lives.

I've decided to give myself two months (so, june 1st) to pamper myself, lose the weight I gained, etc. before even thinking about going out & wanting to meet someone. I'm debating splurging on a gym membership (or getting a cheap one just for the elliptical) and am also putting a bit of money aside for small pampering things. This week, I fixed my bike so I can bike to work. Next week, a mani/pedi. The week after that, maybe something from sephora? and every time I hit a weight loss goal (5 pounds at a time) I will get a cute, cheap item of clothing.

I have 12 - 15 pounds to lose, and I know I should focus on 1 pound a week, but I so desperately want to fast forward through this. I feel absolutely empty right now and can't concentrate on work, friends, family, etc. He really was everything.

How are you guys pampering yourselves outside of eating well and working out? Now, I guess, is the time to have fun with at-home beautifying things. Hair, skin, bath salts, makeup, creams, etc. Any suggestions?

You are soooooooooo strong zara and you are coping with it well. I admire your positive attitude. Whatever you do, don't totally blame yourself. Don't beat yourself up as I did. I just learned from my mistakes and realised it wasn't all my fault, we were both to blame so I decided not to stay stuck in self blame. A breaking heart, God it's such a hard thing to beat. Good luck to you and in reaching all your goals. You are young. Time is on your side, however, having said that at the age of 38 AND three kids, after I healed, a new man came into my life. He found me. I didn't go looking for him and I just know with your attitude that you will be fine!

I'm so in.

I was dumped after 8 years and feel very much what you are articulating here. I appreciate your response coconut and it's very positive to read when everything seems so sad. Getting through this is very tough.

Aw you're welcome and yes it is VERY tough to say the least. I found separation/divorce tougher than if he had died. At least with death we can grieve for the person who didn't leave us by choice. People used to say "time will heal" and that particular saying used to annoy the heck outta me! lol. I used to think oh whatever, you're not going through what I'm going through and you don't have to bring up three sons on your own and I'll never get over this! The people who said that meant well with their words, they were just trying to comfort me and I did get through it and so will you. It wasn't really the time that healed me. It is what I chose to do with that time. It was also faith in God and belief in myself. Some counselling helped too, just a few sessions to put me on the right track again. I asked God for what I needed and what I wanted in life. He answered my prayers. There IS light at the end of the tunnel of heartbreak and pain.

I wish you well and much happiness in the near future :flowerforyou: