Have a Freaking Goal

MrsCon40
MrsCon40 Posts: 2,351 Member
via Gawker http://gawker.com/5898771/have-a-freaking-goal


This isn't some happy-sappy, inspirational, news-you-can-use, you-can-do-it, ABC-123, paint-by-numbers, pure-positivity-motivational-speaker Lifehacker post here. Don't get it twisted. This is some real ****. This isn't some **** where you look at the headline and say to yourself, "Oh, looks like someone just wrote down what was on the inspirational laminated wall poster in my middle school gymnasium locker room, no need to re-read that." Take another look, brother. Goals: do you have them? Well ****ing get some then, homeboy.

I'm not talking about some feel-good, easy, no-sweat, self-affirming, boost-your-fragile-ego "goal" that you have to put in quote marks because it's like, come on, "go to the gym" is not a real goal, let's get real over here. I'm talking about a goal. Let me give you an example of a goal: "I will squat 315 pounds." That's a goal. "But but but," you say, "I hurt my knee back in college and then the other leg I lost in that train accident and now I'm in a wheelchair powered by a joystick and I go to the gym simply for physical therapy to prevent my withered limbs from atrophying, so there is quite literally no way that I will ever squat one single pound, much less 315 pounds."

Not with that attitude you won't.

See, you can't just wander into the gym with no focus or plan and be like, "guess I'll go 'work out.'" Yeah, sure you will. [*Makes jack-off motion.*] This is the sort of lack of forward thinking that leads to workouts composed mostly of sitting on a bench and looking at your iPhone, or—even worse—of running slowly on the treadmill for 30 minutes. [*Shudders. Makes jack-off motion again.*] I have a little saying that might help you in the gym: "Without goals, you're nothing, much like a soccer player who's paid to score goals but never does." Think about that every single day.

Without a goal in the gym, you just float around doing whatever you "feel like," or using whatever machine is open, because you're lazy, and you spend a few days lifting some weights and then the next few days doing something else until the strength you gained from the first few days completely dissipates and by the time you go back to those exercises you have to start right back where you were in the first place. It's like being on a treadmill, all right—a treadmill to nowhere, of fitness. You'll never squat 315 pounds while standing on a treadmill, metaphorical or otherwise.

Fitness requires an investment of time. A lot of time. And after many, many months or years go by, and much effort is expended, one day you will find yourself standing in the gym, feeling tired, and you will ask yourself, "What am I doing here?" The correct answer is, "I am working up to squatting 315." If your answer is, "I don't know," you start getting all philosophical. The gym is not a place for philosophy. The gym is a place for action. Goal-oriented action. Do you know what happens to philosophical types in the gym? They find themselves trapped underneath a bar while having an existential crisis. Don't do that.

The good news is that goals are easy—and fun! But not easy. A fitness goal should be aspirational. A good fitness goal is something that makes you say, "There is no way I can do that, but if I could do that I would be hardcore as a mother****er." And then next thing you know you are doing it.

This is why we do it, ladies and gents. By "do it" I mean follow a constant logical progression of incremental increases of stresses placed upon our bodies until our bodies achieve the desired adaptation. No matter how ambitious your goal is, there is only one way you will get there: One extra 2.5 pound plate at a time. One more rep at a time. One second faster at a time. One minute longer at a time.

One step at a time.

...

Replies

  • sarah_ep
    sarah_ep Posts: 580 Member
    :flowerforyou:

    Goals are definitely a big part of my fitness program. Thanks for this.
  • tig_ol_bitties
    tig_ol_bitties Posts: 561 Member
    :flowerforyou:

    No, seriously. I wish I could give you a fahking flower right now.
  • joejccva71
    joejccva71 Posts: 2,985 Member
    Spoken like a true prodigy, Em. Bravo.
  • _GlaDOS_
    _GlaDOS_ Posts: 1,520 Member
    Excellent. I can't wait to be hardcore as a mother****er.
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
    This is an excellent and helpful post. Well done.
  • yummy♥
    yummy♥ Posts: 612 Member
    thank you for sharing this, it's very well written and makes me want to
    KICK MOAR *kitten*!
  • MissO﹠A
    MissO﹠A Posts: 906 Member
    I love this. :drinker:
  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
    Beautiful. Bad *kitten* and beautiful.
  • anubis609
    anubis609 Posts: 3,966 Member
    Hardcore motherf*ckers need hardcore motherf*ckin' goals. Great post, Mrs. C.
  • Loko_Ino
    Loko_Ino Posts: 544 Member
    This is why you are my friend on here..you are pimp
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
    You've seen my summer schedule, I don't plan to have a month without a challenge . . . what's the point otherwise?
  • RainbowBrite86
    RainbowBrite86 Posts: 245 Member
    A-freaking-men! :)
  • skylark94
    skylark94 Posts: 2,036 Member
    A fitness goal should be aspirational. A good fitness goal is something that makes you say, "There is no way I can do that, but if I could do that I would be hardcore as a mother****er." And then next thing you know you are doing it.

    I need to print that and hang it on my mirror.
  • msunluckythirteen
    msunluckythirteen Posts: 335 Member
    Just the kick in the a** I needed! Thanks!
  • mikda999
    mikda999 Posts: 41 Member
    You mean I can set a goal and obtain it? Now way! I know what my goal is, now I just have to reach it!!! Thanks for the kick in my pants I needed.