I'm a failure

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Replies

  • pstaceyca
    pstaceyca Posts: 306 Member
    I am not sure how you can say you are a failure...you are doing this and lost 6 pounds!! To me that is FAR from being a failure. Figure out what you can eat and go from there.Don't be so focused on what you can't eat, that will only stress you out! You are doing great!!
  • janeite1990
    janeite1990 Posts: 671 Member
    6 pounds in 6 weeks is good. Exactly on target. Just. Keep. Going. You reached the tipping point. It will get better.
  • jenj1313
    jenj1313 Posts: 898 Member
    6 lbs in 6 weeks is actually good progress, not a failure.

    You said "So I have lost some weight, and although it's not a lot, I do feel a bit better about myself, but I am not where I want to be, and I don't know how to get there. "

    MFP can help you find the way, so stick with it...but realize that the path may be winding and it may be slower than you want. Nothing in life that's worth having comes easily, right? Keep working, and you'll get there.

    It sounds like you're very ill and in a lot of pain. You also sound like you may be depressed (just a guess, not an expert here). That's normal though. If you were in your health* situation and NOT depressed, you'd probably be crazy.

    I'm not going to tell you what to do because you asked us not to... but I do hope you can see from all the responses here that you are making progress, and that you can use that place as a stepping stone to keep moving forward.

    Wishing you the best of luck.
    Keep posting!
    Jen

    *edited to add the word "health"... because it sounds like you have a wonderful family that supports and cares for you... and that is not depressing at all!
  • Usbornegal
    Usbornegal Posts: 601 Member
    You have so much on your plate to deal with all at the same time - you are indeed a Warrior Princess to face these battles daily and still look for ways to improve.

    A couple thoughts:
    Depression is often a serious side effect of serious illness and may be contributing to your down feelings even though you are working very hard. Check with your doctor about finding a good therapist that deals with serious medical issues.
    If you have not been to one lately, get a referral to a registered dietician for help on figuring out your calorie levels and foods to best benefit you. Your dietary needs are way to complicated for me to comment on, for sure!

    You have much to add to MFP conversations and message threads even if you become an encourager for others. You don't have to have answers for everything, but as you found it can help tremendously just to hear that you are not alone, you are working hard, you can do it! Plus it helps your own mood to be positive about/ for others.

    Keep up the good work!
  • Leigh_b
    Leigh_b Posts: 576 Member
    You are stronger than you think you are. I have two young children that wear me out on a daily basis and I don't have debilitating health issues. Your strength and perseverence is amazing. Take one day at a time, celebrate the good ones and put the bad ones behind you. You can get there... it will just take time.
  • WarriorCupcakeBlydnsr
    WarriorCupcakeBlydnsr Posts: 2,150 Member
    I read your epic post (awesome job explaining, helped me better to form my answer) and have to say, all things considered, you're rockin' it!
    Anyway, I would like to point out that your medications can affect your ability to lose weight, so there may be some slowing in your weight loss from that (and let's face it, if you need the meds, you need the meds.)
    I noticed in your description of a day in the life of you that your diet is high in starches (I understand the limitations, I am learning to live with mine as well) and lower on proteins (you mentioned there were a few types of protein you can eat) you may feel more full if you decrease the starches and add in some more of the proteins you can eat. Can you have protein shakes made with soy or whey? Maybe a chocolate protein shake when you're having that chocolate attack?

    Keep the faith my dear, you may find the answers here, you may find them from another site, but remember you are awesome and if you keep putting one foot in front of the other, eventually, you'll reach the goal!
  • Robin_Bin
    Robin_Bin Posts: 1,046 Member
    Amazed you're doing so well! Given all you're up against, you're doing wonderfully! And I can see why many of my suggestions were way off the mark, but I'm glad you took it in the positive spirit in which it was intended.
  • Pebble321
    Pebble321 Posts: 6,423 Member
    You lost 6 pounds in 6 weeks? That's a bloody successful failure if you ask me!

    I know we all have down times and it sounds as though you have a lot on your plate with medical issues, children etc.
    So, once you've indulged in a little bit of "woe is me" time, stop beating yourself up and keep up the good work - you DO know what to do, you just have to keep on with it.
    So, that means eating what works for you, keep logging your meals, move as much as you can (can you play silly dancing games with the kids?) and accept that losing weight isn't easy but that you are making really positive changes that WILL pay off in the long run.

    Hang in there!
  • Beffster
    Beffster Posts: 14
    So sorry I have taken so long to reply, a mix of the Easter holidays, a crazy 4 year old, a baby we are trying to persuade not to be a night owl, a half decorated cloakroom, a wonderful paint splattered husband, a Ruby Wedding anniversary, an unhappy pouch and a whole host of other excuses:ohwell: , I haven't been able to get online as much as I would have wished. I have finally been able to sit down and have been reading all of your encouragement and support- thank you all.:flowerforyou:

    I am nervous about tomorrow as it is 'weigh day' I am not feeling too hopeful, I have changed my weight loss goal to half a pound a week, rather than 1lb- this has increased my daily calories from 1310 to 1526. At first I had no idea how I was going to eat the extra calories, however, it seems the more I eat, the hungrier I am, and I am actually struggling to stay within the allowance:blushing: I am feeling a bit flubby and wobbly- a mix of the extra calories and less than usual excercise- wondering whether it is worth giving the scales a miss tomorrow, and waiting till next week when I will be back on my normal routine with daily excercise?

    Now, responding to some of your questions and asking some more questions....

    First of all, How do I go about measuring myself instead of weighing-? seeing the scales say I have lost even just 1/2lb does help me psychologically, but I can't think that type of loss would register in inches?

    Rubybelle- thank you for your response, and for your encouragement- we are silly dances ago go here- I have never considered them a tool in my weight loss journey- but now you have mentioned it, I think we may be sticking the boy's Abba CD on a few more times a day- every Mamma Mia helps :smile:

    Rachelh6- I am constantly battling my need for meds, against my desire for body happiness. I have made a few changes to my drugs recently, and I think that has helped me lose the small amount of weight I have so far managed to shift.

    I know very little about protein shakes, but they are certainly something that I would really like to try- do they jus taste like regular milkshakes? Are they low calorie? I have no idea where to look for them, I am in the UK, so if anyone could name some places for me to go to buy some, that would be fab:flowerforyou: .

    A few of you have mentioned depression- depression is certainly not a stranger to me and my family, and there are days I feel depressed, but it is a feeling that comes and goes, My husband and I talk openly about how we feel, and there are days when I will mention a dark cloud hovering overhead- we work towards white skies with big patches of blue- and usually we can achieve that. I have rest days, days out, cuddles, favourite books, films. hobbies and sometime just 'woe is me' days to try and pick me back up, but if the cloud doesn't shift, I have in the past sought help, but it's been a while, we can normally change my clouds between us, but we are always aware that sometimes we/ I need help. Does that make sense?

    I know I probably don't come across as one in my posts, but I am a positive person, I have more things to smile about than to moan about- my health whilst not ideal, could a whole lot worse, spending so much time in hospital reinforces this, so many people have a far harder time than I do. I was told (twice) I would never fall pregnant- proved them wrong both times.I was told I had less than an hour to live, still here. I was lucky enough to marry my best friend, I have wonderful children, they drive me batty and melt my heart - often within the same minute. I have a house that isn't the biggest, nor the most lavish, but it is our home, and my favourite place on earth to be. I have an amazing network of friends and family, and I have a future that I will never give up on. I am not 'Pollyanna' about life, but I have enough positives to give me a kick up the *kitten* everytime I am looking at my half filled cup.

    Although I haven't mentioned you all by name, I have read every word you have each written, I have quoted many of you in my notebook ( I am notebook and list freak) and I have taken onboard all of your positivity, words of wisdom and everything else inbetween. Thank you so much.

    Thank you too for the friend requests, It's great to be 'getting to know' some new people, and I hope I can offer you some help, friendship and support too- thank you all x

    :flowerforyou:
  • clareeast
    clareeast Posts: 64
    Like others have said - I see no failure here!

    Looking after a young family and a home means that you are moving lots! It may not be formal exercise, but it all counts. And you seem to be of the mind-set of gradually increasing your walking etc. All good stuff...

    I would definitely look into protein shakes - I don't know where I would get them from, but there must be plenty of suppliers available through the internet. My brother had something similar years ago (about 30!), which was a powder to be mixed with milk - he had a chocolate flavour one. There was also a plain one which could be mixed with juice. No idea whether they were low-fat as I wasn't really concerned with such things at that time.

    I think you're doing fabulously with all you have to contend with - my excuses are slightly bigger children, and bouts of endometriosis and adult-onset asthma. You have given me a metaphorical kick up the *kitten*, even if you never intended to! {{{{{HUGS}}}}

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