People Don’t Get It?

_ylime_
_ylime_ Posts: 661 Member
in Motivation and Support
So I have been on this site for about a month now, and I have lost 10 pounds as of today! I have not eliminated anything from my diet – I consider this a change for life – not a quick-fix diet. I eat anywhere from 1700 to 2000 calories per day (I have a sedentary job, but I go for a minimum of 3 walks per day with my dogs and during breaks at work, I also do P90X, weight lifting, and a mix of other sports/activities).

Anyways, everyone on MFP has been so supportive and most seem to understand that this is (I think it is) a healthy way of losing weight. However, folks in my office, my family, and many of my friends just don’t seem to get it. My day is filled with little comments such as “you shouldn’t be eating that on a diet”, “you are never going to lose weight eating that much”, “you don’t want to lift weights, they will make you bulky”… It is just annoying (and they are just plain wrong in most cases). If I try to explain why… well things just get worse… like some crazy Dr. Phill speak. I guess all of the comments are just getting to me... :grumble:

Oh well… I guess this is just a rant, but feel free to rant along with me. I guess my kick a** results will have to do the talking for me…

Thanks for letting me vent. :flowerforyou: Any advice is welcome.
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Replies

  • sweettthings
    sweettthings Posts: 157 Member
    Ignore them and let your success speak for you.

    Congratulations! :D
  • iuangina
    iuangina Posts: 691 Member
    Some people think they know everything. I got into with my brother-in-law over some nachos a couple of weeks ago. He started in about you shouldn't be eating that on a diet. He didn't want to hear about a spike day or the fact that I had just spent 3 hours biking and running. I guess that's why he is fat and will never lose weight. Haters are gonna hate! Congrats! Keep doing what works for you.
  • melaniecheeks
    melaniecheeks Posts: 6,349 Member
    I'd just smile, shrug my shoulders and say "we'll see!"
  • PinkCoconut
    PinkCoconut Posts: 655 Member
    As you said, your kiss a** results will shut them up for sure! I've lost over 90lbs without a "diet" program and I never cut out my favourite foods!
  • thomassd1969
    thomassd1969 Posts: 564 Member
    OMG I so know what you mean, at Easter I mention I am trying to eat healthy and lose some weight and I get well you should do this or not do that. I was at my manicure last night and my manicurist said "oh you look great, what are you doing" I told her just watching my calories, exercising and drink only water about 90-130 oz a day. She was like oh my gosh your drinking way to much water. That will only make you retain water. I just smiled and thought are you serious as you sit there and drink diet soda filled with chemicals.
  • gemiwing
    gemiwing Posts: 1,525 Member
    Whenever that happens- think of all of us here on MFP who are doing this the same way. Now think of us all standing in a line to give you a high five because you ARE doing it right.
  • angie_sample
    angie_sample Posts: 190
    i have some people like that in my life too. i just dont talk about fitness/nutrition or anything like that with them. You just do ur thing and dont worry about people like that. :)
  • Livingbalanced
    Livingbalanced Posts: 84 Member
    Whenever that happens- think of all of us here on MFP who are doing this the same way. Now think of us all standing in a line to give you a high five because you ARE doing it right.

    Right on and *high five*
  • _ylime_
    _ylime_ Posts: 661 Member
    thanks guys! this is why I :heart: MFP... keep it up everyone... :drinker:
  • trababes1971
    trababes1971 Posts: 173 Member
    I totally understand where you are coming from hun, ive had it before, as in "eesh surely you cant eat THAT on a diet"! and like you im NOT on a diet, im just making changes and trying to be a lot more healthy but i REFUSE point blank to give up somethings that i love. If i did deprive myself of these things i know for a fact i would just think oh sod it, and probs go out of control and binge. I dont need to binge.. i just need to have a little of what i fancy if i feel like it. The fact you have lost weight proves you are doing something right hun so ignore these comments. People always have something to say wether positive or negative hun its just the way it is, but you know what you are doing is best for you so let them just crack on waffling crap lol!! xxx
  • SweetNScrappy
    SweetNScrappy Posts: 1 Member
    You listen to your body and it will tell you what works for you. I say shut 'em up with your results...that will be the best satisfaction!
  • BeautifulSurprise2
    BeautifulSurprise2 Posts: 10
    I have heard those comments all my life. I come from a family where everyone was thin expect me. All I can say is keep doing what you are doing. Losing weight and maintaining it, is a "lifestyle change" not a "diet". You know your body better than anyone else!
  • ladyraven68
    ladyraven68 Posts: 2,003 Member
    I just never told anyone until they noticed the difference, then they couldn't start with the "Oh that won't work!"
  • almc170
    almc170 Posts: 1,093 Member
    I've found that it's far more effective to talk about my workouts than my diet.Trying to lose weight is almost like being pregnant--people see it as invitation to chime in and offer "helpful advice." Start talking about the specifics of your weight lifting routine, though, and their eyes glaze over and they immediately change the subject.
  • SARgirl
    SARgirl Posts: 572 Member
    Congrats on your 10 pounds! I totally agree! Most people have been super supportive but there are always those few that have to be a downer! My sister-in-law on Easter saw my plate and said "can you eat all that on your diet or is this a special treat?" I told her I eat pretty much whatever I want and log it in. She then called me a liar and I showed her my food diary for the past couple days and she was amazed at what I was eating and still losing weight! She then said (in a defeated tone) "all I eat is salad and nuts". I told her to eat more!
  • JodieElijah
    JodieElijah Posts: 136 Member
    Your results will definitely speak for themselves!! Keep up the amazing work :)
  • mruntidy
    mruntidy Posts: 1,015 Member
    you've lost weight
    you're losing consistently
    you've changed your mentality to health and diet
    weights will only make you bulky if you're lifting big

    haters gonna hate it always amazes me that the people that aren't actually actively changing their lifestyle are the ones with the most advice on it
  • tcunbeliever
    tcunbeliever Posts: 8,219 Member
    If theyre nice and genuinely trying to be helpful, then I usually respond with "thank you, I'll take that into consideration." If they are being catty or ugly, then it's "I'm sorry you feel that way."
  • kayl3igh88
    kayl3igh88 Posts: 428 Member
    For the first few weeks I was getting those comments from my Mum, until I reminded her that a little support goes a long way, then she started acting as if she were the best bra in the world :happy: :laugh: so my point is that if they won't listen when you explain then they just aren't worth your time :flowerforyou:
  • Loko_Ino
    Loko_Ino Posts: 544 Member
    You now have the answer to why obesity is an epidemic in this country....ignorance.
  • marynmarty
    marynmarty Posts: 89 Member
    :smile: I think your doing great!!! Don't let what people say affect what your doing. I think people want to see people fail or if they notice they are doing good they want to put them down. A lot of Jealous people out there!!! I say keep doing what your doing as you are getting great results.
  • mellabyte
    mellabyte Posts: 193 Member
    Do what works for you. (Sounds like tiny bits of jealousy to me.) For some people using the term "diet" is not positive, but thinking of things as a "lifestyle change" is. I'm in the lifestyle change boat. I never say I'm on a diet. Just that I'm trying to live healthier, which happens to mean eat less, eat better and move more.

    I have fries, ice cream, chocolate, whatever all those "diet no-nos" are. I just don't eat them _all the time_ and I don't eat _large portions_. Two things in the past that I didn't have the will power or self-control to do, but after taking ownership can manage it. :)
  • carriem73
    carriem73 Posts: 333 Member
    Some people think they know everything. I got into with my brother-in-law over some nachos a couple of weeks ago. He started in about you shouldn't be eating that on a diet. He didn't want to hear about a spike day or the fact that I had just spent 3 hours biking and running. I guess that's why he is fat and will never lose weight. Haters are gonna hate! Congrats! Keep doing what works for you.

    this!!! very nicely stated!!!
  • saragato
    saragato Posts: 1,154
    Those who know the least often speak the loudest.

    What you're doing is obviously working for you and you're happy with your pace and it's not an unhealthy way to go about it. Regardless of what you do, there will be people who talk like that and think they're giving advice when really they're either being very snide or are just misinformed. Because really, what does the Average Joe know about weight loss without doing research? They basically parrot what TV tells them and what is now outdated advice/tricks simply because it's been repeated too much.

    In the end you know what works for you, you'd change it if it didn't, and in time your results will be enough to shut them up and prove them wrong.
  • Serah87
    Serah87 Posts: 5,481 Member
    What idiots!!!! :grumble:

    You are doing great, keep up the great work and the results of your hard work will show them!!! :flowerforyou:
  • trijoe
    trijoe Posts: 729 Member
    Losing weight and getting to a more healthy place is a lot like raising kids - EVERYBODY who doesn't do it knows all the answers on exactly how to do it. And aren't afraid to share those answers. Those that do it know the answers lie in yourself, and are basically your answers to figure out.

    Such is Life.
  • BlueStar1989
    BlueStar1989 Posts: 130 Member
    Keep doing what you're doing because it works for you. They will either see the light or stay in the dark.
  • jonnyb62
    jonnyb62 Posts: 426
    For all of you who have had the negative comments, I have one suggestion - stop telling people you're on a "diet." The word diet has been defined by our culture as a period of time when you will eat less, starve yourself, or do some other foolish thing in order to lose weight. In this popular definition, the diet has a defined start and end. What I hear you all saying is this is for life - a true lifestyle change. People will still be snarky at times, but at least you don't have to listen to the folks who "can't believe you would eat THAT on a diet!"

    Just my two cents, take it or leave it, and keep up the good work! :drinker:
  • darrensurrey
    darrensurrey Posts: 3,942 Member
    You now have the answer to why obesity is an epidemic in this country....ignorance.

    Indeed!

    Given that they are ignorant, I would blind them with science. Drop in "insulin response", ketosis, kreb's cycle and metabolic rate. Then if they make some half-baked response, tell them they clearly don't know what they are talking about and ought to do some research.
  • mamamc03
    mamamc03 Posts: 1,067 Member
    My MIL always asks....can you have that on your diet....I'm Like...I can have anything I want. It's not a diet people!! Go check out my blog on the word diet. ;)

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/mamamc03/view/four-letter-word-153865

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