22 and Continuously Self Sabotaging

Hey Guys,

I am 22 years old and on a mission to get happy and healthy.

A month or so ago I was making great progress but as soon as I got to a weight I hadn't been at in a while the sabotage began! Even though I knew I still had a lot of hard work to do I started eating crap again and then I got down on myself and being an emotional eater it basically went downhill from there....

I don’t know how to stop this from happening and saying no to temptation, yesterday it was a girl’s birthday at work and sure enough I helped myself to some chocolate cake even though I had promised myself to start again fresh that same day.

Why is it that I can’t say no to my own temptation and I end up being my worst enemy?

I would love to make so new friends/support buddies as I feel it would probable help and any help would be so greatly appreciated. :smile:

x

Replies

  • olivia_june
    olivia_june Posts: 111 Member
    Hi, I'm Olivia and I'm 21.

    I am very very similar. I am a total emotional eater and I always sabotage myself after a few weeks or a month or so of exercising regularly and eating healthy.

    I recently started a 6 week "get healthy" challenge with my mom group, and i am doing pretty good with that because there is a list of things to do per day, and I find that putting things in a list format makes me more likely to do them, if that makes sense. I get easily overwhelmed (in fact, just had a breakdown about this yesterday), so putting things into a logical format makes it easier for me to accomplish. Examples would be "stop eating before 9 pm", "drink 64 oz of water", "exercise for 30 OR 45 mins" (at least 5 times a week), "no sweets" (6 days a week), etc.

    Not sure if that would help you or not, but I find that for the first time I am actually being really good about saying "NO", which is completely out of character for me, I LOVE food.

    :)
  • microMXL
    microMXL Posts: 51
    Just try to be more disciplined, I know it is not easy, but just think how happy are you going to be without the guilt of that chocolate cake
  • I am the same way. An emotional eater, and I just love to eat. What I have learned since I recently started working out again is its ok if you mess up. I don't mean that you go back to eating crap everyday, but if you mess up, its ok. Just know that you can do better tomorrow. Everyday is a new day. I have had a couple "crap" days, and just have not given up. Since the end of February I have lost 23 LBS. And I only weigh myself once a month, so I am not sure what I have lost in the past couple weeks. I used to beat myself up when I would mess up. And would just throw everything out the window that I had worked so hard to accomplish. But know that you can do it. And if you have a bad day, make tomorrow a good day. And just take it one day at a time. Keep up the work because if you put your mind to it, you can do it. And if there is something you really really want...you can have it as long as its in moderation. Because that was another one of my mistakes was trying not to have any of my favorite things. You just don't have it everyday, and like I said in moderation.
  • liv2die
    liv2die Posts: 1
    I am the EXACT same way. You are not alone. It's scary because you think you have control over your own actions but it's so easy to give into your impulses. I don't have an answer, but I am working to solve this problem for myself. I'm thinking I have some kind of underlying psychological issue that needs to be addressed first, so I may see a therapist.
  • wild_wild_life
    wild_wild_life Posts: 1,334 Member
    Today at work there was a big chocolate cake and cupcakes sitting out and every time I walked by it I just thought, "this is not an option. It looks like there is a chocolate cake there but it is an illusion and having a piece is just not possible." It seemed to help me resist it by sort of taking it off the table so to speak so I didn't even have a "choice" of whether to have any or not. Just a mind game but it may help with resisting temptation. Darn chocolate cakes, why do they have to exist?
  • DG_Allen
    DG_Allen Posts: 219 Member
    Your will power is not infinite, you use it up as the day goes on like gas in a car. Also, the amount of glucose in your blood steam impacts your will power. If you your hungry and presented with a piece of cake, you have very little chance of saying no. Eat a healthy snack before going to the birthday party.

    Find other places in your life where you have to use your will and see if you can work with those differently. For instance, instaed of using your will to do the dishes and clean your kitchen (example only) make it a habit to do those things every day. Then you have more will left in your tank for other things.

    It's a challenge. I tend to do the same thing. I get to my goal and then I loose focus on it. Just keep trying and don't give up!

    edited for typos
  • Remember that if you screw up, the whole day is NOT ruined. I used to tell myself that the day was shot if I ate one piece of junk food. I would pig out on whatever I wanted, since I'd already "ruined the day". It's just not true. Eating right the majority of the time with a slip up is so much better. So you ate a piece of chocolate cake...we all slip up. Move on from it and make a really lean, healthy dinner. GL!
  • Hey! I'm a Katie too :) and I eat the exact same way. Something that someone told me that helps is to drink a glass of water when youre having those really bad cravings,wait about 20 minutes and see if you still have the craving. It doesnt always work but it definitely has helped me more times than not. I'm still trying to figure it out though. It's not easy working at a desk all day and having easy access to a snack room full of junk :(
  • Oh my gosh you are me to a T! I do the exact same thing and it's a really hard habit to break :( Feel free to add me we can support each other!
  • dcmami07
    dcmami07 Posts: 7
    I am 22 as well and I totally understand where u are coming from. I just started back on my "lifestyle change" April 10th. I work at a sandwich shop that has lots of cookies(soooooo good!) and other things that are bad for me. The only advice I can give is to try to resist temptation, which is easily said then done. But you have to have the right mindset to get to your goal weight, which I had to learn all over again. If you ever need some motivation or someone to talk to feel free to send me a message. I sent you a friend request. :smile:
  • StarvingDiva
    StarvingDiva Posts: 1,107 Member
    Remember that if you screw up, the whole day is NOT ruined. I used to tell myself that the day was shot if I ate one piece of junk food. I would pig out on whatever I wanted, since I'd already "ruined the day". It's just not true. Eating right the majority of the time with a slip up is so much better. So you ate a piece of chocolate cake...we all slip up. Move on from it and make a really lean, healthy dinner. GL!

    THIS! I too used to do that, oh I had a cupcake so that meant the rest of the day I binged. Now if I have a cupcake, I just allot for it in my day, and make better choices the rest of the day.
  • Thanks so much for your support and feedback guys! means a lot :flowerforyou:
  • enchantingemma
    enchantingemma Posts: 5 Member
    I'm a total emotional eater and drinker. I eat when I'm sad, I eat when I'm happy.

    I am now trying to take it one day at a time. :smile:
  • enchantingemma
    enchantingemma Posts: 5 Member
    Remember that if you screw up, the whole day is NOT ruined. I used to tell myself that the day was shot if I ate one piece of junk food. I would pig out on whatever I wanted, since I'd already "ruined the day". It's just not true. Eating right the majority of the time with a slip up is so much better. So you ate a piece of chocolate cake...we all slip up. Move on from it and make a really lean, healthy dinner. GL!

    THIS! I too used to do that, oh I had a cupcake so that meant the rest of the day I binged. Now if I have a cupcake, I just allot for it in my day, and make better choices the rest of the day.

    I used to be guilty of that too. Now I have realised that if I make a bad food choice then I have to be super healthy for the rest of the day!
  • suziecue66
    suziecue66 Posts: 1,312 Member
    Katie, you are young don't waste your time yo-yo dieting. I have for the past 10 years and I can't get those years back.
    Get to goal weight and maintain for life. just do it.
  • Kay2405
    Kay2405 Posts: 54
    Hey, feel free to add me! I'm 22 as well and need to lose 2-3 stone. Have put on waaaay too much weight after having a baby.

    Kay. x
  • sondra216379
    sondra216379 Posts: 174 Member
    I am 32 but I am still the same way. Seems like there is always crap food sitting around the office where I work....some days I can say no, and some days I just cannot resist! each day is a new day that's how I get by.
  • Tink_889
    Tink_889 Posts: 244 Member
    Hi Katie,

    I'm 22 and also guilty of this. I tend to be a very emotional eater and can definitely identify with a lot that's been said - like it used to be if I ate one "bad" thing, it lead to ruining the rest of my day. I'm trying now to approach my diet as a whole and not really look it as a diet, but more like getting a healthier balance & lifestyle so that I can still have chocolate if I want but lose the weight that I need too.

    I find MFP really helpful. I've been on here before and left, and I think that was my biggest downfall because the support is fantastic and the encouragement to kind of keep you on the wagon!

    I hope you don't mind me adding you as a friend :)

    Lottie x
  • Thanks :smile: I'm trying really hard to get there.
  • milocoop
    milocoop Posts: 2 Member
    I feel as if I wrote this myself...... :sad: I was doing great, and then wham! So I have dusted myself off, and began loggin again.... :smooched:
  • sally1992
    sally1992 Posts: 11

    A month or so ago I was making great progress but as soon as I got to a weight I hadn't been at in a while the sabotage began! Even though I knew I still had a lot of hard work to do I started eating crap again and then I got down on myself and being an emotional eater it basically went downhill from there....

    It's like listening to myself! :laugh:
  • Teapotdomescam
    Teapotdomescam Posts: 156 Member
    I'm 22 as well and although I myself don't suffer from this I do know people who have. I find that the best way they tend to deal with it is to find a hobby that distracts you at the time being. try to avoid situations or thoughts in which you find yourself triggered. Perhaps keeping a food diary will help? For me, it has helped me a lot. I never realized how much sugar I was consuming until I started writing it all down. Once you start to become accountable for your own actions, you will realize when to stop and when to keep going. I don't believe in depriving oneself of anything because we all deserve to spoil ourselves from time to time. Perhaps you can make a simple goal for yourself. Start by eliminating a little temptation. Every day you go without eating it you can get a calendar and mark it with an x. Maybe if you start physically seeing the results it will motivate you in the end.
    I wish you the best of luck!!
    You can do it!
  • jpfost
    jpfost Posts: 192 Member
    just dont give up if you mess up one or two days. everybody eats crap they shouldnt sometimes.. the trick is to not do the whole screw it my diet is over! its a battle everyday that you can win! ONE DAY AT A TIME thats all you got to do, worry about tomorrow,tomorrow.

    You can add me if you like been at this for a couple years
  • talamer
    talamer Posts: 516 Member
    Hi Katie,

    We are all mostly having the same problem. But with continuous exercises and strength training, u will get your body in shape.
    I usually have a bad habit as sometimes I eat too much, but in the other hand I try my best to stick with my schedule to burn some calories in my body.

    I know sometimes you hangout with friends/family or attending to special occasion like parties/birthdays. for sure u will eat some junk food. As I think one day or two each week will not affect as you are trying not to fall from the wagon.

    anyway if you need support and friend, you can feel free to add me.
  • WandaVonDunajew
    WandaVonDunajew Posts: 183 Member
    Oh sweety, I know exactly how you feel! I'm an emotional as well, and food has always been my comfort, especially in time of stress or grief... The only thing that (marginally) helps for me is exercising (I tend to be much more disciplined when I work out) which right now is not an option (herniated lumbar disk and paresis in my left leg :sad: ) and keeping the food diary, logging the food BEFORE I eat it. that way I get shocked by the amount of calories and restrict them...

    Good luck through your journey, you can do it!
  • snewsome7
    snewsome7 Posts: 189
    Remember that if you screw up, the whole day is NOT ruined. I used to tell myself that the day was shot if I ate one piece of junk food. I would pig out on whatever I wanted, since I'd already "ruined the day". It's just not true. Eating right the majority of the time with a slip up is so much better. So you ate a piece of chocolate cake...we all slip up. Move on from it and make a really lean, healthy dinner. GL!

    ^^^ THIS. Tomorrow is a new day. It is okay to treat yourself every now and then. Just in moderation. I find that if I don't allow the things I really want in moderation I end up binge eating. Good luck to ya!
  • mogletdeluxe
    mogletdeluxe Posts: 623 Member
    Remember that if you screw up, the whole day is NOT ruined. I used to tell myself that the day was shot if I ate one piece of junk food. I would pig out on whatever I wanted, since I'd already "ruined the day". It's just not true. Eating right the majority of the time with a slip up is so much better. So you ate a piece of chocolate cake...we all slip up. Move on from it and make a really lean, healthy dinner. GL!

    Absolutely the above. I'm an ex-binge eater, and would see one slip-up as license to blow out in style. Now, I just accept it for what it is - a blip, nobody's perfect - and then try and compensate over the rest of the day. Life's too short to worry about one mistake - but it's also too short to perpetuate it.

    Good luck! x
  • ebonypixie
    ebonypixie Posts: 61 Member
    Hi Katie.
    You reiterated my thoughts exactly. Im 23 and a very emotional eater.. If im worried, scared, sad or even happy I am uncontrollable. The worst thing that gets me is tiredness, when I come home from work and go through a spiral of more crap after more crap because I think Well I 'already ate that one bad thing today' and 'I deserve it coz Im wrecked'.
    I find it helps if you can retrain yourself to think of a 'treat' as something non-foody.. (not as easy as I thought but worthwhile).. so for example, going for a walk and then a long hot shower, doing your hair, nails, even housework if your desperate.. and THEN if you still want something have something that takes a while to eat/drink so you can savour it. I usually freeze yogurts to eat for these times. They are sweet and take FOREVER :)

    Add me if you like!
    Niamh
  • kami89
    kami89 Posts: 12 Member
    wow, I could have written your post myself. I completely binged the weekend before Easter, and also on Easter. All that crap got back into my body, and I just couldn't stop. I kept waking up saying TODAY I will be better, TODAY I won't eat junk. And I kept doing. I mean- yesterday? I hate 4, FOUR bowls of sugary cereal. Today is my new day- my new resolve. I don't have the answer for you, but just know that you are not alone. I'll send you a friend request =)
  • really happy to have made some great new friends after writing this :smile: