Eating disorders and nowhere near recovered?

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GotEffingFat
GotEffingFat Posts: 5 Member
in Introduce Yourself
Hi, I struggle with anorexia and bulimia. Most of the time I live on energy drinks and rice crackers and every time I try to eat healthily I either gain weight then freak out and go right back to the way I was or I keep eating healthily but have to purge. My weight usually sits about 48kg(about 105 pounds) but does drop down about 10kg(to about 38kg/83 pounds). Right now its gotten out of control, up to 58kg and I'm realllllly struggling to keep eating properly, looking for other people struggling, who want to recover but are really finding it hard to support each other, please add me :)

Replies

  • randomlycastle
    randomlycastle Posts: 7
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    Hey, I'm a recovered anorexic :) With recovery, I found it helps to focus a lot on what's going on in your head and dealing with that while trying to increase your intake.
  • Jessi__
    Jessi__ Posts: 31
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    Oh honey, I'm sorry you're having a hard time of it! I have suffered with EDs on and off for years and am struggling at the moment with recovery too. I will add you, and am here if you need to talk :)
  • kristineevans
    kristineevans Posts: 56 Member
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    Thanks for the add, sorry your struggling, I'm avoiding the docs like the plague at the moment as don't feel " ill " enough or thin enough to warrant help, but my periods have stopped due to weight loss and purging so trying my hardest to eat a bit better to get them back, even though they are a total pain lol! Not very good at the advise stuff but always hear to listen and help if I can!
  • mz_hartbreaka
    mz_hartbreaka Posts: 23 Member
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    i hvent had anorexia but can relate to havin an Ed of some kind, where all u do is obesess about weight, and i wuld do anything to lose it frm starving myself to taking illegal stimulants, to perscription pills, to throwing up, my last result was haivng surgery however it has only warped my perception of myself even more, i have lost 26kg but everytme i look in the mirror i see a girl fatter than b4, people keep tellin me how much weight ive lost and that im skinny but im not i can see im not so now using mfp i can track my calories. Most of the time coz of my surgery if i eat to quick i vomit so 8/10 times i eat i vomt any ways...its not only bout the physical but the mental aspect, i may not be 45kg but i put my body thro hell and back to try and obtain perfection, and i am still trying and i prob wont ever stop..just thort id share and if u eva wana chat pm :)
  • Morgan803
    Morgan803 Posts: 56 Member
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    Im here for support i have struggles with EDs too ill add you we can supprt eachother
  • MelV1
    MelV1 Posts: 31
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    bump will be back!
  • tig_ol_bitties
    tig_ol_bitties Posts: 561 Member
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    Are you seeking professional help, sweetheart? I'm 27, and have struggled since I was 9 years old with this. I STILL struggle each and every day, but it does get better, and it does get easier. I still see a therapist who specializes in ED's once a week, and it really does help to have a safe place with a professional where I can express anything. All I can say is, the number on the scale may change, but you're still, and will always be, a beautiful person and it does get better.
  • Faintgreeneyes
    Faintgreeneyes Posts: 730 Member
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    If you are really struggling that much- please seek the advice of a medical professional/ a mental health counselor who is trained in helping treat ED's. It is easy to revert back to old thinking and eating patterns that are unhealthy. Getting the right tools to help you combat your irrational thinking, and knowing how to overcome it will help you in the long run.

    I myself have suffered with an ED for a good portion of my adult life- and therapy has helped me tremendously.

    Good luck to you.
  • mandijo
    mandijo Posts: 618 Member
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    I'm sorry that you're going through this. I myself don't know what it feels like to have an ED, but have helped friends who have. Have you ever thought of seeing someone that could maybe walk you along the steps to recovery? It took my good friend lots of support from family and friends in addition to someone who didn't know her as closely as we did. She could sort out her thoughts and feelings with someone who didn't know much about her. I'll be praying you find peace and the ability to come through this stronger and healthier!! Add me if you'd like. I try to be a great supporter/encourager!
  • yesthistime
    yesthistime Posts: 2,051 Member
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    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/309-disordered
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/1264-recovering-from-bulimia-anorexia
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/2234-self-injury-eating-disorder-support
  • claricecollins
    claricecollins Posts: 54
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    I'm struggling with anorexia and bulimia too and I'm not even close to being recovered. I get how difficult this can all be. I'll add you. :)
  • love4fitnesslove4food_wechange
    love4fitnesslove4food_wechange Posts: 6,897 Member
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    I was once anorexic--very bad time in my life. Gained ~30 pounds and never looked back. Some days are a struggle to accept this body but I've never relapsed. It can be really really difficult but recovery is one thing I'll never regret. Having an eating disorder isn't living at all--it's misery.

    ((Hugs))

    you can keep going and fight this. First thing I recommend is to toss ANY AND ALL CLOTHES THAT DO NOT FIT YOU...you are not too big, the clothes are too small. Also, try to get rid of the scale if you can. Maybe try eating with other people and allow someone else to serve you. Have someone thin/healthy eat with you and eat what they eat--obviously they didn't get fat eating that way so it helps a bit to comfort yourself. (at least it does for me).

    Find someone you can go to when you're struggling. It's okay to have down moments and admitting it is the only way to beat it!
  • TrailRunner61
    TrailRunner61 Posts: 2,505 Member
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    Recovered here. Get help, I didn't and it took me TOO long to figure out WHY I was doing that to my body. It's not about how much you weigh, it's about controlling something. Please do it before you have damage you can't reverse. Trust me, you'll regret it later in life if you don't. Good luck and <hugs>
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
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    I am a recovered anorexic and bulimic, and then I was heavy, and now I am healthy. What I've learned over the past 20 years is that ED's have nothing to do with your body and everything to do with what's going on in your brain. It's an addiction, and it's control issues. To get through it you need a therapist, and you need to switch out your focus. When you're eating healthy you're gaining weight for 2 reasons 1) your metabolism is severly damaged and running grossly slow and will do so until it evens out (and it will even out if you give it time), and 2) you, my dear, are under your healthy weight and your body wants to be healthy.

    Please seek professional help for long term resolution and happiness.
  • weighlossforbaby
    weighlossforbaby Posts: 847 Member
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    I had anorexia 6 years ago. I was 125 lbs, 5'7, and in a size 4. I got married amost 5 years ago and hubby made sure I ate which led to me gaining 50 lbs and throughout our marriage I gained 7 more lbs. I want to lose 22 lbs to get to my goal weight. I never looked back about my eating disorder or slid back into it because it almost took my life.

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