Advice on finding a healthy balance?

femmi1120 · April 2012

I've been having a really hard time finding a nice balance lately. I have had issues with disordered eating habits in the past, and I've been doing really well with being healthy, but lately, I've just been having a really hard time.

Wednesday morning I had a really intense work out and burned about 500 cals. Later that day, I ended up eating it all back in sweets, and I still would have been within my calorie-range, but I decided I'd still feel better if I went for a run/walk to burn it off. It felt so good that I didn't realize until the next day (yesterday) that I seriously overdid it. My legs and calves were so sore it hurt to walk.

Yesterday, I went over cals, but I was way too sore to burn any of it off. I felt so helpless and frustrated that it led to a binge last night (my first one in forever). Didn't even track it...

This morning, I was determined to get back on track until my mom told me we're going out to eat tonight at this place where the menu does not have nutrition facts and isn't super diet-friendly.

I do have some options, though, like lean protein and veggies so that won't be an issue. The problem is, this place also has my favorite dessert which I know we'll be getting and almost every time I eat it, I end up overdoing it. This is one of those all-or-nothing foods for me, and I'm going to have an incredibly difficult time using moderation.

Now I'm stressing hard core. I don't know what to do. I want to just not eat anything and spend the rest of the day working out so I can actually eat dinner without freaking out. Or just make up a reason not to go at all. But I know neither one of these will bring me any closer to having a healthy relationship with food, which I desperately want.

I just feel like my judgment is seriously clouded right now and I don't trust it, so I'd love some advice from someone more reasonable.

femmi1120 · April 2012

I know it's a lot to read, but it would help me a ton...

Thanks in advance to anyone who responds.

NoraMich84 · April 2012

I am sorry you are feeling like this. It is difficult to strike a balance. Some days I do great, other days not so much. So know we are all here trying to get healthy together. I don't have any really good advice (I hope someone does), other then to tell you to cut yourself some slack. You won't eat "perfect" all the time. So you know you will be around high calorie, sugary foods tonight, let yourself have one treat. Tell yourself it is okay. Eat well today (breakfast, lunch, dinner) and do some moderate exercise. Drink lots of water. Tomorrow, no sweets. Eat well all day. Don't over do the exercise, because you don't want to injure yourself. Just pay attention to your target nutrition goals, if you go over them a one day a week, that is okay, tell yourself the next day will be better. Wish I could offer more help. But take each day one at a time. :flowerforyou:

Livingbalanced · April 2012

I've definitely been there before and hear what you're saying. Many of us have been taught since toddlerhood to have a distrustful relationship with food (clean your plate and then you can have dessert is just one example).

It's hard to relearn how to understand food in a healthy, respectful and loving way. I'm on that journey myself and I'm really trying out 'forgiveness' for whatever has happened in the past and moving forward.

I also have been following Intuitive Eating (just google it and it'll pop up) and it has helped tremendously as well. Principle #6 is about the Satisfaction Factor and really and truly savouring our food - really enjoying the taste and the experience of our favourite foods. When we do this, we're less likely to overindulge because we've felt like we've had 'enough' because we feel satisfied.

What do you think about trying this? Going in to the evening knowing that you're going to ENJOY your favourite dessert (savour it, eat it slowly and with awareness) and without guilt. It takes practice but it will come.

And as for the exercise - if you use it punitively, it will so much harder to view it as a fun and/or enjoyable activity. If every time you have to go to the gym is because you're punishing yourself for decisions, you may end up resenting working out and that won't be good either.

Thinking of you!

femmi1120 · April 2012

I've definitely been there before and hear what you're saying. Many of us have been taught since toddlerhood to have a distrustful relationship with food (clean your plate and then you can have dessert is just one example).

It's hard to relearn how to understand food in a healthy, respectful and loving way. I'm on that journey myself and I'm really trying out 'forgiveness' for whatever has happened in the past and moving forward.

I also have been following Intuitive Eating (just google it and it'll pop up) and it has helped tremendously as well. Principle #6 is about the Satisfaction Factor and really and truly savouring our food - really enjoying the taste and the experience of our favourite foods. When we do this, we're less likely to overindulge because we've felt like we've had 'enough' because we feel satisfied.

What do you think about trying this? Going in to the evening knowing that you're going to ENJOY your favourite dessert (savour it, eat it slowly and with awareness) and without guilt. It takes practice but it will come.

And as for the exercise - if you use it punitively, it will so much harder to view it as a fun and/or enjoyable activity. If every time you have to go to the gym is because you're punishing yourself for decisions, you may end up resenting working out and that won't be good either.

Thinking of you!

Love the username, kind of perfect right now too

This is actually something I hadn't thought about. I've gotten so much in the habit of focusing on numbers, that I constantly forget to listen to my body's cues. This is great advice, and definitely something I'll be trying today.

As for the punitive exercise, I have done this many times, but ironically enough, I didn't feel this way the day I overdid it (wednesday). I actually felt really good and enjoyed it. Today, I do feel like I'm forcing it a little bit, to make up for it almost. And the weird part is that I always burn way less calories when it's forced.

Livingbalanced · April 2012

If you're forcing it, it won't do what you want it to do. Your body is sending you all sorts of messages - when it needs to be walked, fed, rested, hydrated... it's telling you everything you need to know - the trick is relearning how to listen to it! It's a process and there will be ups and downs but as long as we keep moving forward, we're moving in the right direction. If you feel like you're forcing your body to workout, you're not listening to it... take the day off or do something that feels natural. Maybe tomorrow will be a better day for your body to sweat it out.

Advice on finding a healthy balance?

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