How to support husband?

shelbiscuitson
shelbiscuitson Posts: 3
edited December 2024 in Motivation and Support
My husband and I are both big people, and he really, really wants to lose weight. I also want to lose, but I am pregnant, due in July, and cannot really diet with him at the time. How do I support and encourage him when I will be eating when I am hungry and he will be watching what he eats? It seems rude and inconsiderate if I get up for seconds...I really don't know how to handle this situation at all. I will be joining him on this weight loss adventure after the baby comes, but he wants to get started now and I don't want to hold him back...I do try to go on walks with him, but I can't keep his pace or go the distance he goes without doubling over in pain, so we have discussed finding a shorter route that we can walk together, then I can go inside the house, and he can go walking again. But other than that, I don't know how to help him! Any ideas would be greatly appreciated!

Replies

  • moeviegrl
    moeviegrl Posts: 52
    First and foremost, get his butt on this site and have him make friends with supportive people. Encourage him to exercise even if you can't. If he wants to go for a walk but you can't, smile and tell him you'll be here when he gets done and to go enjoy himself. My SO is very healthy and has no interest in losing weight but he supports me by telling me he doesn't mind if I go for walks or rides without him. Plus, he is forever suggesting food I could eat and measuring things out for me when we cook dinner. And even though you will be eating more then what he will be, you can still eat the same healthy foods as he does. I mean...try and be thoughtful and don't woof down a double stacker from burger king in front of him if you know he is trying to lose weight. And if at all possible, avoid having sweets and goodies in the house. If you must have some for your cravings, have them somewhere out of site of him. Out of sight, out of mind. Don't make a big deal about it, just try and eat healthy and not tempted him with forbidden foods. :)
  • moeviegrl
    moeviegrl Posts: 52
    Also, I am not sure about exercise and pregnancy (Never been, never want to be) but I know that there are some exercise programs designed for pregnant women like working out in a pool. Maybe you and him could look into this more and see about doing something like that together. Low impact and yet still helpful in losing weight. :)
  • shelbiscuitson
    shelbiscuitson Posts: 3
    I told him to download the mobile app on his phone, and that we would be starting tomorrow. We need to go grocery shopping, but the house is empty of food anyway, lol. I looked up some healthy recipes and will be buying the ingredients. I am hoping he will be excited to try new foods! I will be happy to cook, and I pray they turn out!

    I am really hoping he visits this site and makes new friends that can help him along. This is the first time in the seven years that I have known him that he is actually serious about making changes. And I know that if I can help him now, he will be able to support and push me later. We can change as individuals as well as changing as a family. It will all be for the better!
  • ZugTheMegasaurus
    ZugTheMegasaurus Posts: 801 Member
    He sounds a little scared or confused to me. He doesn't want to go it alone, even though he probably knows it's not realistic for you to participate right now.

    It's hard to tell if he said that it's "rude and inconsiderate" for you to eat more or if that's your own analysis; in either case, that perspective needs to stop. You are not eating more because you don't care; you're eating more because the health of your nearly-here baby is of the utmost importance right now. I'm sure the both of you can appreciate that.

    Start small; he doesn't have to throw himself into it headlong right when you're dealing with a significant physical obstacle. You're definitely on the right track with new, healthy foods. As the popular adage goes, weight loss is 80% diet and 20% exercise (or my personal favorite, diet to look good with clothes on, exercise to look good without them)!

    Being supportive doesn't mean being a drill sergeant or doing everything the same way. It's about sharing goals, celebrating even the little victories, and picking one another up when you stumble. In the end, only he can control this for himself; you're a good partner for wanting to help so much.
  • tami101
    tami101 Posts: 617 Member
    Congratulations! Eating healthy and getting exercise is good for you when you're pregnant. I think if you both eat healthier meals and get more exercise, all three of you will benefit!
  • kurenaikumo
    kurenaikumo Posts: 271 Member
    Being pregnant, if anything, should be more motivation than ever to make healthier food choices! There are, as others have said, specially designed exercise programs for pregnant women. As your doctor, I'm sure he would agree. Unless there's a serious underlying issue that requires bed rest, there's no reason you can't at the very least go for a short, leisurely paced walk.

    I think the most supportive thing you can do is try to avoid bringing his trigger foods around him, do your best to make better food choices, and do what exercises you can do along with him.
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