Where do you dig your motivation from?
NewBallGown
Posts: 3 Member
I hear people who have lost weight say, "nothing tastes as good as being thin feels" but I just can't identify with them.
I have gone down this road before and lost 50 pounds, but I did not feel any differently at the end. I still had the aspects of my body that I wished weren't there. I wasn't running any marathons. And I still had trouble finding clothes that were cut for my body type.
Back then I had a job that I could walk to and it kept me on my feet all day. I had a gym in my apartment complex that I went to on my days off. But I didn't have to try all that hard to get the weight to come off.
Years later, many emotional events later, the weight is back (plus some) and I'm chained to a desk all day. I don't eat junk food or fast food, so my diet isn't terrible but the weight keeps creeping up. I know I should care to protect my health, but I just can't be motivated to become a gym rat. I love to cook and am around food a lot. When I am the one cooking, food does taste better than thin feels. How do you overcome the emotional fulfillment that food brings?
I am getting to an age where we have to decide if we are going to have kids or not but I am too heavy for what I would consider a healthy pregnancy (5'9" & 227lbs).
I want to care. I want to be motivated. I'm just not. Where do you find the motivation to care enough to do something about the weight?
I have gone down this road before and lost 50 pounds, but I did not feel any differently at the end. I still had the aspects of my body that I wished weren't there. I wasn't running any marathons. And I still had trouble finding clothes that were cut for my body type.
Back then I had a job that I could walk to and it kept me on my feet all day. I had a gym in my apartment complex that I went to on my days off. But I didn't have to try all that hard to get the weight to come off.
Years later, many emotional events later, the weight is back (plus some) and I'm chained to a desk all day. I don't eat junk food or fast food, so my diet isn't terrible but the weight keeps creeping up. I know I should care to protect my health, but I just can't be motivated to become a gym rat. I love to cook and am around food a lot. When I am the one cooking, food does taste better than thin feels. How do you overcome the emotional fulfillment that food brings?
I am getting to an age where we have to decide if we are going to have kids or not but I am too heavy for what I would consider a healthy pregnancy (5'9" & 227lbs).
I want to care. I want to be motivated. I'm just not. Where do you find the motivation to care enough to do something about the weight?
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Replies
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The trick is understanding that it didnt take you 12 weeks to get fat and its going to take longer to lose it the healthy way.
Start out by setting realistic goals.
Take photos of yourself to chart progress and ditch the scale.
Having a firm understanding of how weight loss and fat loss works helps as well.
Check the link on my profile for info and if you have any questions let me know.0 -
From the intense desire to NOT be someone who is sick due to being overweight. People in other places are starving and I'm getting fatter? Sounds like gluttony and ignorance at its strongest.0
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Hi, I love pottering about in the kitchen and have enjoyed the challenge of cooking the most healthy versions of my favourite foods. Also there are so many yummy recipes to try out on this website!
Maybe that would change where your motivation is coming from.
Also, you don't have to be a gym rat to lose weight. I haven't set foot in a gym and have lost 19lbs. I do a bit of swimming a bit of walking a bit of vigorous cleaning etc.0 -
Wow ... I'm a glutton and ignorant? Thanks for the "support"... do you run a suicide prevention line with hold music too?0
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My motivation comes from the fact that MFP is working for me. I've lost at least 1 lb a week since I started. I feel better and have more energy. I like that my pants are looser and I almost need a new belt. I like feeling smaller and lighter. These things keep me from taking the donuts that people frequently bring in...0
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The trick is understanding that it didnt take you 12 weeks to get fat and its going to take longer to lose it the healthy way.
Start out by setting realistic goals.
Take photos of yourself to chart progress and ditch the scale.
Having a firm understanding of how weight loss and fat loss works helps as well.
Check the link on my profile for info and if you have any questions let me know.
Dan - thanks for the tips ... it isn't that I don't know HOW to do it .... its that I'm finding myself not caring enough to just DO it. I need something to kick me into that "I give a crap" zone.0 -
So if you don't care enough to make changes for yourself, you could consider turning your motivation inside out, focusing externally until something does click. Ok, that sounds super-academic. What I mean is best illustrated with an example.
My best friend is 38 years old and has Multiple Sclerosis. A few years ago, I started doing the MS Bike Tour in my community in the effort to raise money to help the researchers find a cure so that I don't lose her prematurely. It's a tough experience - 170km over two days on a bicycle. There is no way you can do it if you don't train. So every year, as the tour approaches, I need to get my butt in gear.
My suggestion - find something you're passionate about and have a personal connection to - cancer, diabetes, heart and stroke - and sign up for an endurance event that is 4-6 months out. Sit down and make a realistic plan for how you'll achieve the goal. As you fundraise, you'll find supporters make a huge difference in motivating you to work out. When they give you money for an event, even if it's a dollar, they expect you to put in the training.
What I always find is that with the exercise comes the food. When you're working hard, your body really does crave the good stuff!
I hope this helps!0 -
Wow ... I'm a glutton and ignorant? Thanks for the "support"... do you run a suicide prevention line with hold music too?
You asked what was every ones personal motivation!! This wasn't an attack on you it was an answer to your question -__- This was an irrational over reaction!0 -
The trick is understanding that it didnt take you 12 weeks to get fat and its going to take longer to lose it the healthy way.
Start out by setting realistic goals.
Take photos of yourself to chart progress and ditch the scale.
Having a firm understanding of how weight loss and fat loss works helps as well.
Check the link on my profile for info and if you have any questions let me know.
Dan - thanks for the tips ... it isn't that I don't know HOW to do it .... its that I'm finding myself not caring enough to just DO it. I need something to kick me into that "I give a crap" zone.
I think when you have your first NSV youll be hooked.
I can show you the road!
Its hilly and long and some places will be scary.
I'll show you but I wont hold your hand.
=D
Just understand that you can eat well, sleep well and workout every once in a while and youll lose the weight.
Join a gym!
Make sure it has a squat rack though and stay far away from weight machines!
=D0 -
I hear people who have lost weight say, "nothing tastes as good as being thin feels" but I just can't identify with them.
I have gone down this road before and lost 50 pounds, but I did not feel any differently at the end. I still had the aspects of my body that I wished weren't there. I wasn't running any marathons. And I still had trouble finding clothes that were cut for my body type.
Back then I had a job that I could walk to and it kept me on my feet all day. I had a gym in my apartment complex that I went to on my days off. But I didn't have to try all that hard to get the weight to come off.
Years later, many emotional events later, the weight is back (plus some) and I'm chained to a desk all day. I don't eat junk food or fast food, so my diet isn't terrible but the weight keeps creeping up. I know I should care to protect my health, but I just can't be motivated to become a gym rat. I love to cook and am around food a lot. When I am the one cooking, food does taste better than thin feels. How do you overcome the emotional fulfillment that food brings?
I am getting to an age where we have to decide if we are going to have kids or not but I am too heavy for what I would consider a healthy pregnancy (5'9" & 227lbs).
I want to care. I want to be motivated. I'm just not. Where do you find the motivation to care enough to do something about the weight?
Sorry to be a pain but if you've got no interest in yourself I'd look at my job and my marriage and ask myself what I don't like. Are you trying to avoid the child issue by not dieting? Are you sick of your husband and trying not to turn him on? I'm not trying to be mean, I'm trying to find out what the wall is in the way. Everyone has motivation unless it is blocked: you have to unblock it and then it will flow again.
As it so happens you don't need motivation to diet. You just need to restrict your calorie intake. As the people above say, and I agree - once the kilos start disappearing it gives you all the motivation you need. I find myself saying 'no, I'll stick to the diet and see what I've lost tomorrow morning!" and it's an exciting adventure, and no privation at all. But the rest of my life is in line, and I spent years overweight without the rest of my life in line. Maybe I'm projecting but I suspect you're in no-man's-land personally and not losing weight is protecting you from something.
If you sit down and ask yourself what is stopping you, you might find your answer and you also might avoid wasting years of your life living in a cocoon you don't enjoy.0 -
When people talk of motivation, it reminds me of Michelle Bridges, and her attitude towards motivation
Here is an article which describes it better than I can
http://www.mamamia.com.au/health-wellbeing/heres-the-secret-to-motivation/
This is probably the most important part though
"As the panel discussed some research into how many Australians are overweight, the subject of how to change people’s behaviour came up and I directed a question to Michelle: ”How do we motivate ourselves to exercise? What’s the secret?”
Her answer was surprising.
Basically, Michelle thinks the idea of motivation is bull****. I’m paraphrasing because her mouth is not as potty-ish as mine but that’s her basic view.
Like the rest of us, Michelle doesn’t adore exercise when she’s doing it and she doesn’t particularly look forward to it. And it’s this myth – that we should LOVE exercise and be inspired to do it – that so many of us use as an excuse not to.
Michelle says she’s asked about motivation all the time because people assume she is a motivation machine. But she’s not. “I don’t wake up, pump my fist in the air and go ‘YES! I’M GOING RUNNING! RUNNING! YESSSSSSS!’” she insists. Just like she doesn’t wake up and go “YES! I’M HAVING A SHOWER AND BRUSHING MY TEETH.” Or “YES! I HAVE A DENTIST APPOINTMENT!” It’s just what she does.
If you wait for motivation to magically appear? You’ll still be sprawled on your couch watching The Real Housewives in a decade.
The clouds do not part. Inspiration does not strike. You will probably never be overcome by the urge to exercise. You. Just. Do. It.
It turns out Nike might be onto something. Who knew?"0 -
I was always big, overweight from the age of about 7. During the teenage years I'd always say ok I'll loose x amount of weight by summer. Did 1 day of exercise and ate 1 bowl of salad and didn't see a change so carried on eating massive bowls of cheesy pasta and wondered where I was going wrong. I put on even more weight when I was pregnant and when my daughter was 5 months I was like "shhh*it! I'm going to be having to run around after her soon. And making her all this healthy stuff to heat while I was shovelling in cake and fried stuff was a massive wake up call. I cut out fat, well, stopped eating things with more than 5g of fat per 100g. It's worked and I'm nearly at my goal. I've joined a gym, I exercise still eat well but allow myself the odd treat knowing that I can lose the couple of lbs I may put on. It's definitely a lifestyle change. I don't think I could ever eat as much as I used to anyway my stomach wouldn't fit it in!0
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When people talk of motivation, it reminds me of Michelle Bridges, and her attitude towards motivation
Here is an article which describes it better than I can
http://www.mamamia.com.au/health-wellbeing/heres-the-secret-to-motivation/
This is probably the most important part though
"As the panel discussed some research into how many Australians are overweight, the subject of how to change people’s behaviour came up and I directed a question to Michelle: ”How do we motivate ourselves to exercise? What’s the secret?”
Her answer was surprising.
Basically, Michelle thinks the idea of motivation is bull****. I’m paraphrasing because her mouth is not as potty-ish as mine but that’s her basic view.
Like the rest of us, Michelle doesn’t adore exercise when she’s doing it and she doesn’t particularly look forward to it. And it’s this myth – that we should LOVE exercise and be inspired to do it – that so many of us use as an excuse not to.
Michelle says she’s asked about motivation all the time because people assume she is a motivation machine. But she’s not. “I don’t wake up, pump my fist in the air and go ‘YES! I’M GOING RUNNING! RUNNING! YESSSSSSS!’” she insists. Just like she doesn’t wake up and go “YES! I’M HAVING A SHOWER AND BRUSHING MY TEETH.” Or “YES! I HAVE A DENTIST APPOINTMENT!” It’s just what she does.
If you wait for motivation to magically appear? You’ll still be sprawled on your couch watching The Real Housewives in a decade.
The clouds do not part. Inspiration does not strike. You will probably never be overcome by the urge to exercise. You. Just. Do. It.
It turns out Nike might be onto something. Who knew?"
Yep! I love this answer
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I hear people who have lost weight say, "nothing tastes as good as being thin feels"
I can't even begin to tell you how much I hate that saying.0 -
I'm just going to keep it real with you: If you don't care, then you can't possibly hope for someone else to care. What I mean by that is this: Helping others takes energy. Motivating others takes energy. You share in their triumphs and failures. But for those who motivates others, regardless if they fall a thousand times, the energy comes from the individual at least caring enough to take that first step of a thousand mile journey. Good luck to you.0
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My husband had a heart attack and nearly died. He ate what I fed him. What a wake up call! I knew it was past time for a lifestyle change if we wanted to live a healthier life. I could hardly walk. I was miserable. I just decided I was going to do this for him and for me. He also wanted to change. He got a heck of a scare. Its a shame you have to get older before you realize how precious life is. And not just life but a good life. Thats what I want for myself. I have lost 34 pounds. Its not easy and I have a long way to go but I decided I am worth it. I want to feel good and feel good about myself. I never really have felt good about myself because I always struggled with weight issues. How sad it that? Do it now, do it while you are young, don't wait for a health crisis to realize you want to live!0
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I am getting to an age where we have to decide if we are going to have kids or not but I am too heavy for what I would consider a healthy pregnancy (5'9" & 227lbs).
I want to care. I want to be motivated. I'm just not. Where do you find the motivation to care enough to do something about the weight?
You are about where I was when I started (@ 5'9", 235+lbs). Quite honestly, no one can make you want to care, except YOU. like others have said, find external reasons for caring ... perhaps use the goal of having kids as motivation/inspiration. For me, it was a combination of things, but the main ones are:
1. Me being a good steward of this body that God gave me so that I can fulfill my mission for Him here on earth.
2. Being healthy for myself and my wife, so that we can enjoy ourselves. I watched my mom and dad's health decline and it was pretty sobering (literally - for me) to see how poor diet and no real exercise can tear your health down. Dad suffered from diabetic neuropathy, largely as a result of diet and alcohol. Mom was in pretty good health when dad got sick but she wore herself down caring for him.
3. I would like to be able to see my granddaughters grow up. Kinda hard to do if I'm not able to get around.
That being said, I am FAR from a gym rat, and, for me, don't feel that I need to be one to get healthy. I DO walk ALOT as part of my normal day, and then at home with the dogs. I want to stay active, so that I can stay healthy, and I need to stay healthy so that I can stay active.I hear people who have lost weight say, "nothing tastes as good as being thin feels" but I just can't identify with them.
I have gone down this road before and lost 50 pounds, but I did not feel any differently at the end. I still had the aspects of my body that I wished weren't there. I wasn't running any marathons. And I still had trouble finding clothes that were cut for my body type.
Back then I had a job that I could walk to and it kept me on my feet all day. I had a gym in my apartment complex that I went to on my days off. But I didn't have to try all that hard to get the weight to come off.
Years later, many emotional events later, the weight is back (plus some) and I'm chained to a desk all day. I don't eat junk food or fast food, so my diet isn't terrible but the weight keeps creeping up. I know I should care to protect my health, but I just can't be motivated to become a gym rat. I love to cook and am around food a lot. When I am the one cooking, food does taste better than thin feels. How do you overcome the emotional fulfillment that food brings?
The "emotional fulfillment" that food brings is a myth. Just like the "emotional fulfillment" that alcohol brings is a myth. We are trying to fill a void in our souls that cannot be filled. Check out www.therecoverygroup.org for more information on food addictions. Those emotional events that you have had over the years may have taken their toll on you, both physically and mentally, and may also have warped your perspective on how you view food, relationships and circumstances.
I hope these answers help. Please feel free to add me as a friend if you would like. Given that I am in a 12 step program (AA), I feel I may be able to offer some help and insight.0 -
OK, so this is totally normal. Don't do it for external reasons if those aren't motivating - having a kid, looking good, etc. Do it cause it will make YOU feel good. Not right away maybe, but give it time. Being fit and strong is one of those things where when you don't do it, you don't see what the big deal is. But when you are doing it, you realize how good it feels. It's kind of like watching someone else play a sport or ride a roller coaster - you have to experience it, not just watch it, to get what the big deal is. I'd figure out what you enjoy - do you like to dance, are you competitive, do you enjoy being alone or do you want company? If you start with things you like, you'll be more likely to stick to it. If you want company, sign up for classes or join a running group (all levels of fitness are welcome). There are so many ways to burn calories and have fun - don't do something you don't want to do. Also, do you have a good friend in the same boat who needs to start walking or working out? If so, then team up. Walks and runs go by much faster with a friend.
I hate that phrase "nothing tastes as good as thin feels" as well. That's crap. It's not about never eating a pizza or ice cream ever again. I eat those things in moderation and I can stay at my goal weight. But don't look at what you have to give up, look at what you'll get. For me, finishing a race with my best time or sweating in a dance class and laughing with other women is rewarding. And the more you do it, the more you feel rewarded by it. When you're new or not good at something yet, it's not always enjoyable, so give yourself time to get good at something physical and you'll get addicted to improving and not want to go back. And when you exercise regularly, you really earn your treats!
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I want to continue to strive to be better. I don't want to be down in the dumps again hating myself 'cause I felt fat, ugly and useless. I want to remain fit and healthy for as long as possible so one day if I ever get kids I want to teach them to be healthy too. 0
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From the intense desire to NOT be someone who is sick due to being overweight.
^^^^ This.
Three months ago, I couldn't keep any food down for a week because I had finally worn away my stomach lining with coffee and eating whatever I wanted. I weighed close to 240. I could only drink soy milk and gatorade for a week while my doctor had me taking Zantac AND Prilosec each day for the next month. They told me some people have to take the stuff every day the rest of their lives. I winced each time I tried to eat something solid because I was afraid I wouldn't be able to keep it down.
That was it. I was not going to be that person. I changed my eating habits and my menu. I ate a ton of vegetables. I drank a gallon of water every day. I exercised more.
This morning, I weighed in at 192 for about the third day in a row and, this evening, I jogged a solid 10 minute mile non-stop. (Haven't done that since I was in the Navy a couple decades ago.)
I am eating pretty much whatever I want including those tomatoes, pizza sauce and other acidic foods I could not touch in the weeks prior. I haven't had bacon in three months. I had one shot of espresso in a soy latte in three months (just the other day as a treat...didn't really crave it).
What is my motivation? Three months ago, my motivation was to not be sick.
This morning? My motivation is continuing to feel awesome each day as I get out of bed.
Your motivation will change as you make your own journey.0 -
No one can make you care. If you don't care about yourself, your husband, your future plans, then you're not going to lose the weight. You need to believe that it matters, that YOU matter. This is not about being a gym rat or fitting into clothes; this is about your health and your life in the long run.
Think ahead into the future, a good 10-15 years. What do you think of? What might your life look like? I'm not saying make a plan; I myself have a dozen different ideas about what might happen when I ask myself these things. But what I realized is that NONE of them involve being overweight. If I ever want to attain any of those goals or dreams in the way I imagine, then I've got to get healthy at some point.
What you have to recognize is that if you EVER plan on losing the weight, you have only one option. You will eventually have to adopt a healthy lifestyle, like it or not. That is the only way to get there. If you don't, then you'll stay where you are (or, as many people do, continue gaining weight). For me, that's enough motivation. Hopefully it might help you.0 -
I was at a point to where my weight made me so unhappy that I couldn't not care. It honestly came down to either losing weight or giving into what would most likely have turned into depression and even more weight gain.
And at 19 pounds down I already feel so much better! That's what's keeping me motivated! It really does feel better than mindlessly eating all day...so much better.0 -
Everyone has their own reasons for starting this journey and motivations for sticking with it. I for one just got tired of being tired. I realized I always looked forward to the weekends to just sit on my azz and not do anything. I don't take the kids to the park or to do anything. I had become completely sedentary.
I'm 49 lbs lighter now and my motivation is 2 things (other than getting healthier so I can be there for my kids):
1. At 41 years old, 49 lbs gone isn't something to baulk at. I'll be damned if I allow myself to gain them back.
2. I made the decision on 10/31/11 to start this journey. I made an appointment with my doctor for a physical about mid-November 2011. I hadn't had one in quite some time and wanted to see how my bloodwork would come back. I basically wanted a baseline to be able to compare to at a future date. My overall cholesterol was 196. Yes, within normal; however, broken down my "bad" cholesterol is 5 points over normal and my "good" cholesterol is 3 points under. My glucose level was 102. 2 points over normal. This was a couple weeks into joining MFP and having lost 12 lbs prior to the bloodwork.
The second point above is what truly opened my eyes. If I'd continued the path of eating habits and gaining weight that I had been on for years, I would literally eat myself to death. I was waving the red cape like a bull fighter at the bull (diabetes, heart attack etc.) I know I'm going to die some day and would MUCH rather it be later than sooner!
Now, if I can only get the motivation to exercise on a more consistent basis I know my results would be far better. *sigh*0 -
................ How do you overcome the emotional fulfillment that food brings?.............
You find something else to fulfill you. Find something that sparks your interest, something that feels worth while. Food is definitely not emotional fulfillment for me. There is no food in the world that feels better than my husband telling me he loves me, or my children telling me they love me...or the memories we make together where we laugh, and even when we cry. Even the down times when we just keep one another company, and it all just feels so right in so many moments for so many reasons. That is where my emotional fulfillment comes from. My family & my friends.
Living healthy and exercise are just a way of life. You don't have to like it, but you should feel appreciative of the effects that it has on your body and your health. That is what you do need to care about. Your health. No one can take care of your health but you. Your weight has a direct effect on your health and if you don't care, then there is nothing to complain about when you get sick or you feel bigger than everyone else. And like one other poster said...if you don't care about it, why should we? Yet, here we are offering you our opinions and advice.
You don't have to be a gym rat to start living more healthy. Get out and start walking at a minimum. Listen to your music while you do that. You will be amazed by how far you can walk when you are listening to your music. Just start slow and build on it. Watch your portions when you are eating, skip the second helpings, or the desserts. Whatever it may be. Just start simple.0 -
I just had my 3rd baby in 5 years.... My motivation comes from my kids.. it got to the point that I had no energy to play with my 2 older kids and I was always exhausted! I dont want to be like that anymore, I want to be able to enjoy my family life And also my husband is army, and i hate how fit he is and im not lol..0
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Like many have said you first need to realize you are a worthwhile person. Small changes can make big differences!
My reasons are that I don't want to be tied to a pharmacy for antidepressants or anti-inflamatories for things that exercise and weight loss would help resolve.
And really simplistically - I can't stand my rolls of fat sticking together and being sweaty-sticky in the summer. I hate that feeling!0 -
I have a deep desire to be healthy and to have every organ inside me working as properly as it can, I want to enjoy life and I cannot do that with an unbalanced emotional,physical,and spiritual body. Life is about pleasure and you feel the best when your at optimal health in every aspect.
-Kiera0 -
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I hear people who have lost weight say, "nothing tastes as good as being thin feels" but I just can't identify with them...
Looks like you've gotten quite a bit of good advice already, so this is purely for enjoyment.
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my sex drive0
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