Overwhelmed and Frustrated

silverchick · May 2012

Sometimes I just feel completely overwhelmed with the amount of weight loss/nutrition/exercise information that's out there. I'm no stranger to weight loss. I've been overweight my whole life. In the past 8 years, I've really tried to lose the weight but I just keep yo-yoing. Highest weight was 225, got down to 165 at one point, back up to 200, back down to 180, back up to 216 and currently sitting at 198. It's getting hard and frustrating not only on my body but emotionally.

I know the common sense things to follow - eliminating white sugars/flours, no soda, whole grains, eat lots of veggies, lean protein, drink a ton of water. I got the basic stuff down for the most part.

I'm always trying to educate myself further though. It gets really complicated though! Some books/websites are so contradictory. "High protein vs. regular protein", "Eat dairy vs. little dairy", "Low fat vs. regular", "High carb vs. low carb", "one cheat meal a week vs. everyday small indulgences", "high intensity intervals vs. low intensity cardio". I feel very overwhelmed with all the information sometimes.

I just bought the "Choose To Lose" book by Chris Powell. I didn't realize at the time it was a specific weight loss diet plan, but once I started reading it, I thought it sounded interesting! Basically you alternate high carb days with low carb days. I thought I could do this! But then I got into the specific exercise you had to do. Interval cardio training? How would I do my longer runs that I enjoy? What about my hour long Zumba class? I'm sure it didn't matter in the big picture, but I wanted to follow the plan exactly. What if I couldn't manage the low carb days? I LIKE CARBS! I started the book excited and stayed up late to finish reading it and instead I ended it in tears.

I know everyone says weight loss is simple. Eat good foods, exercise regularly, drink lots of water and enjoy everything in moderation. But it's really not that simple most of the time. When I try to get more educated on the topic I just feel overwhelmed.

I don't really know what kind of responses I'm hoping from this post, I just felt the need to vent. If you've read this far - thanks for listening and maybe share what you do to deal with these types of feelings toward weight loss. Thanks!

Pebble321 · May 2012

I understand - I really do wonder some days who the hell I should be believing anymore.

I think some people just really want and like having a plan to follow - it makes them feel like they are doing something really positive and they have a step by step guide. And it sounds much more interesting to say "I'm doing the purple pumpkin plan" than "I'm eating a moderate amount of healthy food and doing a bit of exercise"

In my opinion, most of these plans make it a whole lot more complicated than it needs to be ( you know, only eat at this time of day, make sure you have x% of protein within x minutes of waking, don't eat food in this colour).

But, it doesn't have to be complicated - and you know the basics already. If you stick to eating real food (for me that means not too much processed stuff), eat the right amount for your body (not too much, not too little) and do a bit of exercise, you're going to be much healthier and once you get the numbers right (ie. what is a sustainable calorie intake for your body) you are bound to lose weight.

torygirl79 · May 2012

Find it confusing? Get rid of all the books. Watch calories in versus calories out. Eat what you like within that as long as you don't starve yourself.

Okay you might not lose weight as quickly but I've managed to lose three stone since January without sticking to a specific plan. I don't have to deny myself anything just moderate which makes it a lot easier.

robynelizabeth1234 · May 2012

Hi there!

I find that deep down we all know how to do it, its a matter of dicipline, motivation and consistency. If you already have a good understanding of what healthy eating is then reading websites and books about weight loss should be useful for tips, but i dont think they shouldn't be relied on as the answer.

I have found the more i read about weight loss and nutrition, the more difficult and complex it seems. The more rules i make, the more i fail.
To me it is a matter of accepting that a (mostly) clean diet is the way to go.

Involving lean meat/fish/chicken with some flavourings or low fat sauces, lots of veggies cooked as creatively and tasty as you can, low fat dairy, home made soups (canned will do aswell!) some fruit, and whole meal/whole grain carbs (portion controlled!) Try to have low calories snacks- fruit, yoghurt, a few nuts, baked beans, tuna etc
Think of it simply, eat wholesome fresh foods and stay away from processed foods, take away, soft drink, creamy sauces and sweets.

Find fun exercises to do, as often as you can, as long as your sweating and panting then its all good!
Let yourself have a treat or you will go crazy, life is for living and enjoying. but this is still possible while being happy with your weight if you have them in moderation.

Not many people were overweight a hundred years ago, and they didn't have a million diets and weight loss companys, and they ate simple home cooked meals with fresh ingredients. there was no supermarkets with a million packaged products. You shopped at butchers, bakers, fresh fruit/veg shops etc. Sweets were not as accessible, so to have a nice treat you probably had to bake it yourself, which would lead to a greater appreciation of it. you wouldn't wat sweet food if you had to make it from scratch every day!

So pretty much, keep it simple is my advice

good luck

Sjvarley123 · May 2012

Hi, I know just how you feel, i find the more i read the less i feel i know.

I have struggled with my weight the whole of my adult life but i find what works best for me are keeping to the basics:

1) keep a food diary
2) eat less ( but above BMR)
3) move more

If you have found execercise you enjoy - do that. Try different things by all means, but my sense is that people who manage to maintain their weight loss do it by having made changes to their life style they can stick to.

I find following different 'plans' just means my head is always full of what should i be doing now dialogues which just becomes exhausting and i am much more likely to give up.

I have been following my ' keep it simple' method and have lost 25 pounds so far, but dont feel deprived. I have at least one meal out a week, do Zumba twice a week, swimming and yoga, and feel this is sustainable for me and my head is then free to get on with life.

Sorry - long and rambly answer but hope your find your groove!

Good luck xx

Kari089 · May 2012

there is so much information out there-good and bad but we are all different. we all have different lifestyles and live in different places. you have to think back throughout your yo-yo dieting to see what worked and what didn't and most importantly WHY you didn't keep at it and went back up. As a lifetime yo-yo dieter myself I know exactly what it was for me to veer me off track.
we can have a library full of how to diet books but in the end it comes down to you and you alone to do the work and know whats right for your body.
if you come look at my shelves you will find at least 20 weight loss books..I mean really? I would stop doing one and buy another book thinking that would be the answer. In the end, the only simple answer I used to help me get rid of that was to change my mentality towards weight loss. I haven't told myself this or that is the right or wrong way. Simply cut down on my portions (making sure I am eating healthily most of the time) and I began working out. I used to hate it but now I love it! I had to become my best friend and cheerleader and urge myself to take every step at the beginning. Every step to me was a way to reward my body with something good and not a punishment as I used to see it before.
The books might be full of useful tips..heck half the people here could probably give you a ton of them too, but in the end you have to make the mental change before you can change the physical you. Change your mind and attitude about what constitutes health and fitness for yourself and you will get there. just my 2 cents on what worked for me. good luck!

Fred4point0 · May 2012

Hi silverchick, I really don't think your problem is education or information overload. I think you just need to decide whether you want to be fat and unhealthy or fit and fabulous. You have already lost the weight before so you already know what to do..now just do it again and stick with it this time. You are probably thinking...what do you know. I know plenty being that I was a yo-yo person myself since 1997. I have lost 25-40 lbs on four other occasions. I recently lost 40 lbs and now I'm in maintenance mode. I had lost 15 lbs before joining MFP in January. This is my fifth and final time putting myself through this. I think you should put away the books and go take a long look in the mirror and decide.... do I want to be fat for now or fit for life. Enough said.

islaybower · May 2012

I've read a whole slew of weightless books too, and have eventually come to the conclusion that:

(a) different things work for different people - some love the rules of low carb, some are calorie counters, some like 'points' or 'red' days or 'green days' or concentrating on macros. There's a solution for everyone, and mixing and matching sometimes works and sometimes doesn't (you can't, for instance, mix low carb with anything else really, or you just get fat!)

(b) Eating clean works. If you don't buy anything processed (including sugar), it really is VERY difficult to get fat.

(c) being too strict with yourself seems to pretty much guarantee failure.

(d) What kind of calories you're taking in (e.g. processed, how much protein etc) matters a lot less when you're really overweight - as long as you're taking in fewer calories than you're burning, you'll lose. As you get closer to goal you have to be so much more aware of what you're taking in.

I try to eat clean, calorie count, and work on the principle that if I'm 80% 'good' 80% of the time, the worst that's going to happen is that I stay still, weight-wise (but I don't have any binging problems when I stop being 'good' - I just eat a bit more refined crap and sugar - so that may not apply in all cases)

Weighinginwithmy02 · May 2012

I have felt the same ways for many years and it was paralysing! I would go to the store and just have no clue what to pick (this was back before Eating Clean came along). I wanted to be right. I wanted to be smart. I wanted to follow all of the advice and not mess up. It was so overwhelming.

I chose a source, one that made sense to me, one that spoke to me, and I said "I will follow this" and chucked out the rest. My source happened to be a clinic that deals with people with eating disorders and obesity but I went into it whole heartedly. I surrendered everything I "knew" and told myself "no matter what they ask of me, I will give it a real shot". I would follow them blindly. And I did. Somethings I gave the side eye to actually ended up working. Some things didn't, and when they didn't it was okay, they helped me figure out something that DID work for me.

It was the BEST thing I have ever done for myself. I have been binge free for over a year. My head, and all the thoughts surrounding food, choices, good vs. bad, is so quiet now. I know what I'm doing. I have a plan and I follow it. I trust the clinic and the professionals that are (were, I've graduated!) helping me.

Pick something. Try it. Really give it a go for a few months and see if it works. It may! It may not. Then take it from there.

JessLLoser · May 2012

I too am struggling with information overload. Keep it simple, keep it simple. I am just going to repeat it like a mantra.
I think I have finally found the calories that I should eat.
I am going to stick to it for at least a month.

At the end of the month I will reasess.

If you want to add a friend that shares your frustration, add me.

Let`s cheer each other on.

bellanotae · May 2012

Some replies have hit the nail on the head. It takes discipline, dedication, but most of all a life change. I think people who go up and then down get to the weight they want and stop trying as hard. I know for me that is what happens. I get to my goal and stop working so hard and then the weight comes back on. The key to being smaller, healthier, and for some happier is a life style change. I love my diet because I know it’s good for me no matter what size I am. I feel giving my body health food is important as we need good nutrition. I also know that exercise is a key factor. I don’t like this part as much and it’s been hard to motivate to get up and move. I know how important keeping my muscles strong is. I know the many health benefits from exercise and not just weight loss. If you do the eating right and exercise then the weight loss will follow. I like that this site has many other people who are in the same boat or were in the same boat that can help and support you.

We can do it!

docmenon83 · May 2012

hey
i know where ur coming from....those cravings just dont go away...its a way of life with us
u can do it for 2-3-4 months...but it just comes back with a vengence

there's no easy way to do this...there just isnt...theres only one way to di it...ENJOY IT

if u have the same set of friends on mfp...get new ones
if ur eating the same food daily...mix it up
if ur jogging the same route...change it
if ur bored with jm videos....go pick up a sport

change is the only thing that keeps u going...and be true to ur daily food chart on mfp...eneter every small thing

at the end of it all...v can only support u...but u have to want to lose it all....just keep going...have a bad month..its ok...consider it
as a treat month...then get back on trac...coz u wanna go back to 150-160 and fit into those clothes u love...coz u wanna feel good bout ur body

aditya

ps - i am myself going through a tough period...ur post helped me realise im not alone...its helped me sort a few things
in my head....thanx a mill

sweetpotatofry · May 2012

I feel exactly the same way. And honestly, I don't know! Last summer I watched a slew of documentaries on the food industry and began a very restrictive lifestyle change thinking it was going to be great, that I'd finally be able to lose the weight "I wasn't meant to have," and while I did lose the most weight I ever have (which is still not a lot), I was also frequently tired, had difficulties eating out with friends and coworkers, etc. So I've since given that up and am eating normally again. I guess what's very frustrating is that a lot of the same foods that are often accused of promoting weight gain are consumed in bulk in other countries -- where people manage to stay slim! For instance, I always hear people suggesting that we choose brown rice over white rice, but in a lot of Asian countries people have white rice for almost every meal and the majority of them still manage to stay thin. I think there's just a lot that we still don't know, and the overload of information feels more like elaborate guesswork.

My current state of mind is more of a zen one. Since we're trapped in a flawed system, one that innately encourages us to gain weight, we just have to learn how to operate within it to the best of our ability. I'm trying to take everything with a large grain of salt and listen to my body more closely than before. Even if everything has horrible chemicals in them designed to fatten us up or whatever, we can't just shun entire food groups; it's just not doable for most [normal, average-salaried] people. Moderation in moderation, as a friend of mine once said!

Overwhelmed and Frustrated

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