Having trouble with social gatherings - Any advice?

With spring here and summer just around the corner I am seriously struggling with social gatherings. I'm my family's motivator and rule - enforcer, but needing one for myself and not having one has been so discouraging and a great weakness in this life change journey for me. I don't want to be unprepared & give into temptation.

Need advice to get through this... just looking for someone to pass on some of their success tips -
Feeling alone with this one :frown:

Replies

  • MrT2009
    MrT2009 Posts: 3
    What do you struggle with?
  • pzseeker
    pzseeker Posts: 17 Member
    Last week for example, I was soooooooooooo tempted to have goodies from a dessert buffet (chocolate strawberries) and totaly wanted to try all the food at the buffet table. I felt like I missed out on the yummy food and felt so deprived as I watched family enjoy the food. People even talked about the tasty food and complement my cousins cooking. I couldn't shake the deprived feelings. Can't help thinking that its gonna be a way of life. -
  • Hi all,
    I'm getting married in a years time and i need to lose about 3 stone before then. I'm really good when at work/home but when i go to visit my fiancee's exended family they always put cake etc infront of me even though they know i'm trying not to eat it. Its very difficult as its nearly easier to avoid visiting than avoiding the cakes!! Help!
  • beardmouse
    beardmouse Posts: 19
    Why deny yourself a bit of indulgence on that particular day? You could just make up for it on your other days. I know everyone's different but I never deny myself at such an event. I LOVE food but can easily reign myself in the rest of the week. You could have had a small taste of everything on that table and not felt guilty. In fact you'd have felt better than you do right now!

    x
  • agatronmeows
    agatronmeows Posts: 11 Member
    What about thinking in quantity?
    So for example, my family went to a restaurant and there was dessert there. So i chose to eat less and better for the main, and then have half of the normal size of cake everyone else was having. I felt good that i ate it and didnt feel bad that i did too.

    Just portion sizing i guess :p
  • MrT2009
    MrT2009 Posts: 3
    At buffet or picinic type gatherings I just try to take a small portion of things that I think look good. You don't wnat to feel bad or deprived or you will end up binge eating things that are bad.. just control your portion sizes. After a while you will not want certain snacky items.. i now look at the calories of everything per serving and think it is worth xxx calories.
  • cardbucfan
    cardbucfan Posts: 10,571 Member
    Here are my tips:

    1. get a good workout in that day so you have extra calories
    2. have a little bit of the stuff that looks wonderful-no need to eat that spinach dip with fritos-it's not THAT good
    3. of the things you take in number 2 only finish the stuff that is truly delicious. You know how it is, you see something, think "dang, that looks GREAT!" take a bite and either it's nasty or just O.K. Don't eat anymore! There are no prizes from the Clean Plate Club.
    4. don't deprive yourself. You will fail miserably at this if you start feeling like a martyr that can't enjoy life. '
    5. Balance it out the rest of the week and day. Eat lightly for your other meals (but do eat so you don't inhale the buffet) and the rest of the week, work out a little harder, eat a little cleaner, drink more water.
  • leslisa
    leslisa Posts: 1,350 Member
    Funny, we had a Cinco De Mayo luncheon today at work and, as I often do for these things, I brought my own stuff. Had an amazing salad and strawberries with whip. That being said, my co-workers (some of whom are very sweet) know I'm watching and had made homemade salsa for me, brought in a big ol' veggie tray, and some healthy nacho substitutes. Maybe if you let them know what you are doing, they would be supportive?
  • MaryRegs
    MaryRegs Posts: 272 Member
    We had a Cinco de Mayo fiesta just now at work....I took 10 tortilla chips (yes I counted them) and a teaspoon each of salsa and guacamole-also told my co-worker to body slam me if she saw me heading back for more chips. I LOVE chips...they are my weakness, but I am proud that I am back at my desk drinking a big glass of ice water. You can do it!!!!
  • 2012asv
    2012asv Posts: 702 Member
    Last week for example, I was soooooooooooo tempted to have goodies from a dessert buffet (chocolate strawberries) and totaly wanted to try all the food at the buffet table. I felt like I missed out on the yummy food and felt so deprived as I watched family enjoy the food. People even talked about the tasty food and complement my cousins cooking. I couldn't shake the deprived feelings. Can't help thinking that its gonna be a way of life. -

    That should NOT be your way of life... especially if it's causing you so much distress. You can still have all that delicious food... you just don't have to eat a lot of it! And esp. if it's a party you can prepare for it... eat light before/after the party. Depriving yourself from these things, esp. when it comes to family gatherings will make this whole process not only difficult but dreadful. The idea is a lifestyle change in respect to your overall health... not just cutting out "bad" food. Your heart/mind is in the right place. . . you can do it!
  • awolf2011
    awolf2011 Posts: 265 Member
    I definately have troubles in this department as well, but as I move forward on the journey, sometimes it gets easier. I too am very concious about where I am going for different meals and I too will make sure that I exercise on that day to work off some of the extra calories. I don't deprive my body because I have found that if I don't just eat those 2 chocolate kisses, I will try to find other foods to curb the craving and sometimes I end up eating more calories. You have to allow yourself to indulge every once in awhile, especially if you are very social (which it sounds that way). Just watch your portion sizes and be concious of the deserts and those not-so-healthy foods that people love. Good luck!!
  • FitForLife81
    FitForLife81 Posts: 372 Member
    this is a life style change not a diet. Are you going to go your whole life not enjoying social gatherings?? Probably not. I look forward to the food at these just eat in moderation and like someone else said get an extra workout in. Another thing I do is have a light breakfast and lunch then when I do go to a function at night I have a lot of calories left. =)
  • gerard54
    gerard54 Posts: 1,107 Member
    alcohol...
  • blahblah123314
    blahblah123314 Posts: 39 Member
    Here are my tips:

    1. get a good workout in that day so you have extra calories
    2. have a little bit of the stuff that looks wonderful-no need to eat that spinach dip with fritos-it's not THAT good
    3. of the things you take in number 2 only finish the stuff that is truly delicious. You know how it is, you see something, think "dang, that looks GREAT!" take a bite and either it's nasty or just O.K. Don't eat anymore! There are no prizes from the Clean Plate Club.
    4. don't deprive yourself. You will fail miserably at this if you start feeling like a martyr that can't enjoy life. '
    5. Balance it out the rest of the week and day. Eat lightly for your other meals (but do eat so you don't inhale the buffet) and the rest of the week, work out a little harder, eat a little cleaner, drink more water.

    Love this!
  • pzseeker
    pzseeker Posts: 17 Member
    Thank you all - I appreciate your input. I feel empowered with great ideas and tips to make the right choices and now feel my deprivation is a choice, an attitude feeling - I know is not in me or of me. Social Gatherings I'm ready, cause even if I stumble MFP has my back! Best wishes to all.
  • kimmers1027
    kimmers1027 Posts: 122
    When I am temtped I just think about how I will feel afterwards. Then I walk away. I know if I dont eat it, I will feel so much better about myself. If I do eat it, I will feel like crap.. I always head for the fruit !! It will get easier. :smile: