For those with disabilities

Jezebel9 · May 2012

Thanks so much for posting this, Jezebel. After yesterday's post (which, apparently, was all my fault because I was the one who "misunderstood" first), I was just irate. I appreciate you saying this, motivating those of us with disabilities and acknowledging that we are people just like everyone else.

I wrote a blog post about it a little yesterday, in response to the post...

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/Alice_Liddell/view/on-being-disabled-259423

We shouldn't be torn down. We aren't making excuses. Great job to everyone on MFP with disabilities! You are doing all you can and making your life better!

I don't think you 'misunderstood' anything. People say hurtful things all the time and then make the (invalid) excuse that it was just a joke or you are too sensitive or you misunderstood. That person said she is tired of posts by people who are "disabled" claiming they can't work out.... their excuses are invalid.
I have a hard time accepting excuses for cruelty. And yes it is cruel, because kicking somebody who has been down and came to MFP for support and encouragement brings out my inner avenging super hero. I know I am not a super hero, but when I pretend, I can do more.
8)
Thank you for being the first one to speak up.

Alice_Liddell · May 2012

Thanks so much for posting this, Jezebel. After yesterday's post (which, apparently, was all my fault because I was the one who "misunderstood" first), I was just irate. I appreciate you saying this, motivating those of us with disabilities and acknowledging that we are people just like everyone else.

I wrote a blog post about it a little yesterday, in response to the post...

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/Alice_Liddell/view/on-being-disabled-259423

We shouldn't be torn down. We aren't making excuses. Great job to everyone on MFP with disabilities! You are doing all you can and making your life better!

I don't think you 'misunderstood' anything. People say hurtful things all the time and then make the (invalid) excuse that it was just a joke or you are too sensitive or you misunderstood. That person said she is tired of posts by people who are "disabled" claiming they can't work out.... their excuses are invalid.
I have a hard time accepting excuses for cruelty. And yes it is cruel, because kicking somebody who has been down and came to MFP for support and encouragement brings out my inner avenging super hero. I know I am not a super hero, but when I pretend, I can do more.
8)
Thank you for being the first one to speak up.

I totally agree. She was trying to mask it as "inspiring," but it was definitely a dig. I get so tired of people telling me I'm not trying hard enough or I'm making excuses or anything like that. You're right, it IS cruel.

No thanks, please, I just spoke up because it was necessary. And the number of people who friended/private messaged me later telling me that they agreed with me but didn't want to post in the thread really made me feel a lot better. I know we're out there, and I don't blame anyone for not speaking up, because going against the grain is pretty hard to do. I'm just a loudmouth who doesn't care if others don't like my opinion.

Becky1971 · May 2012

I'm inspired by all of you who posted.

I don't have any physical disabilities per se. I have injured myself which has created limitations, I struggle with migraines, and I struggle with depression and anxiety (The anxiety surprisingly affects my eating and working out more than I could have imagined it would). Having been on medication for 12 years,(Without for almost 6) they mostly made things worse for me. Restless leg syndrome symptoms is something that got started with meds and hasn't gone away. It among anxiety and stress leaves me with a lot of rough nights. My biggest challenge is the lack of motivation that depression leaves me with. Every day is a fight, a fight well worth fighting, but it's a fight. Just to do what needs to be done let alone getting in a workout. The battle is within my head not my limbs. It's very real, I beat myself up all the time because of it. I sometimes will post on my news feed about my struggles, and then feel guilty for it. At least I don't have MS, or am paralyzed, or have cancer... You know? Having what I struggle with just means I need to be stronger, not so wimpy. That's what goes through my head all the time.

I get stuck on excuses a lot, But I really believe the important thing is that I get unstuck. I don't want to stay in that place. I don't want to give up. When we are moving forward, even if it is three steps back before getting there, that's what matters. That we are moving, we are doing, whatever that may be for each of us individually.

Jezebel9 · May 2012

I
struggle with migraines, and I struggle with depression and anxiety (The anxiety surprisingly affects my eating and working out more than I could have imagined it would). Having what I struggle with just means I need to be stronger, not so wimpy. That's what goes through my head all the time.

I understand what you go through, I too have Major Depression, severe. No one can see it, like you could if someone had lost their legs or were otherwise physically crippled. And after hearing it over and over again, one begins to believe and wonder about themselves: "am I just lazy? why can't I just 'snap out of it'... why can't I 'pull myself up by my bootstraps' ?"
It is the devious and cunning nature of depression- it is silent and deadly, it tells you that you are lazy, selfish and worthless. It is a terrible disease in the brain. It affects all other things, because all things begin with your thoughts- It shows you the shadow side of life, the evil men do- hopelessness, helplessness and despair.
I have been through it.
I am one of the lucky ones. I found an effective herbal treatment, and that is the only reason why I am here today.
I wish you the best, I understand not having motivation to do... anything.
I used to have to talk myself through the basic steps of living... get one foot out of bed, get the other foot out of bed, stand up MOVE! ... put toothpaste on the toothbrush, brush your teeth, respond to people , make words...
many times I couldn't get the other foot out of bed or respond to people with words.
Thank you for being brave, in sharing your story. It helps more than you know.

bkscott5 · May 2012

Edit on my pain it's 24/7, not 23/7-typo using the iPod to type and my fingers are too big I guess.

bkscott5 · May 2012

It sounds like a lot of u suffer with the same things I do. I blame myself for not being able to overcome all my disabilities. I know people have it so much worse than me so y can't I just get up and live a perfectly normal life? So we really don't need anyone who is able-bodied to put us down, unfortunately we can do this to rselves enough on r own. Between the physical ailments and the depression that either goes along with that or that is ur disability. So to the person who suffers from depression but didn't think they were disabled, u r a part of us too. Just because u can't see what is affecting a person doesn't mean they don't have anything wrong with them. Back in the good old days, before the cancer, before I lost my leg, on good days although my back was hurting real bad I wouldn't always use my cain (I have problems with my palms and wrists so some days it could hurt them too much to use the cain) so when I would get out of my car in the handicapped parking space people would give me bad looks, one nurse went chasing after me one day and luckily my daughter's friend's dad was the Ine who was driving and totally laided into the woman about my back and since he works in physical therapy he really had some great point. It seems like it is just too easy for people to view the world the way they want. Let's just hope they never have to walk a mile in r shoes, especially since most of us can only make it a few feet. We will stuck together, cuz yes we do have every right to be here, on this site and in this world, trying to do whatever we can to make r lives better even if we r only able to watch what we eat, or maybe we will be lucky enough to try little modified exercises. Some able-bodied friend of mine even suggested I could try an ab vacuum since she thought it may not hurt me. How nice of her to listen and believe what I say and instead of putting me down try to help me! To Jez I appreciate ur service to r country and I'm sorry that u can't get the credit or respect u deserve for what u did for the world either out in the world most times, including the help u need from r goverent, or here on MFP where everyone should only try to support others. As to the person who isn't sure about their spelling, ple post what's on ur mind. I have always had problems spelling, and aging this is supposed to be a site for encouragement not an Englush lesson. Most of us will appreciate ur thoughts no matter how u spell them. Lesson learned we just need to have thick skin! Jez I'm happy to have u as a new friend. Anyone se wants to be friends just send me a request, then we can support each others accomplishments no matter how small other people think they r.

Kalynx · May 2012

First of all I apologize for the 'a lot' comment - I honest to goodness only said that because it made me giggle how I fuzts to go back and correct my own post because that one typo really bugs me personally but I would never point it out to someone especially someone I do not know! I'm sorry folks - lesson learned.

And I just had to comment on

"It seems like it is just too easy for people to view the world the way they want. Let's just hope they never have to walk a mile in r shoes, especially since most of us can only make it a few feet. "

Very true words!!

A lady I work with cannot keep her opinion to herself told me for two years almost weekly that if I only did this or did that I should be able to get my weight under control in no time ...just look at those people on the biggest loser, they are big like you and they can do it. (ugh) ..then she started having heart problems too, lots of water retention around her lungs and heart and a few months into it apologized to me because she understood the exhaustion, struggling to just stay awake sometimes, how winded you get just walking for 40 feet.

Again, sorry folks about the grammar/spelling comment! I was wrong to even post that.

Becky1971 · May 2012

Thank you! Exactly! For me staying away from caffeine, sugar as much as possible and working out is what it takes for me to keep going! And to be able to drown out most of the negative thoughts.

I
struggle with migraines, and I struggle with depression and anxiety (The anxiety surprisingly affects my eating and working out more than I could have imagined it would). Having what I struggle with just means I need to be stronger, not so wimpy. That's what goes through my head all the time.

I understand what you go through, I too have Major Depression, severe. No one can see it, like you could if someone had lost their legs or were otherwise physically crippled. And after hearing it over and over again, one begins to believe and wonder about themselves: "am I just lazy? why can't I just 'snap out of it'... why can't I 'pull myself up by my bootstraps' ?"
It is the devious and cunning nature of depression- it is silent and deadly, it tells you that you are lazy, selfish and worthless. It is a terrible disease in the brain. It affects all other things, because all things begin with your thoughts- It shows you the shadow side of life, the evil men do- hopelessness, helplessness and despair.
I have been through it.
I am one of the lucky ones. I found an effective herbal treatment, and that is the only reason why I am here today.
I wish you the best, I understand not having motivation to do... anything.
I used to have to talk myself through the basic steps of living... get one foot out of bed, get the other foot out of bed, stand up MOVE! ... put toothpaste on the toothbrush, brush your teeth, respond to people , make words...
many times I couldn't get the other foot out of bed or respond to people with words.
Thank you for being brave, in sharing your story. It helps more than you know.

PuggleLover · May 2012

I am sick again with all sorts of infections running through my body. I was able to get in just about 2 weeks of moderate workouts before this sickness hit. It's typical of my health roller coaster and more pronounced since I recently had my gallbladder removed. Anyway, all that to say, I have come back and read these posts on this thread to help me get past the avalanche of horrible thoughts I am telling myself. This has helped me change my inner voice conversation.

I'm tired of hearing other people say I need to take more vit C or get better rest. If sleep cured all my problems, I should be a Olymipic gold medalist.

Thanks again to everyone for being honest and open.

Jezebel9 · May 2012

I am sick again with all sorts of infections running through my body. I was able to get in just about 2 weeks of moderate workouts before this sickness hit. It's typical of my health roller coaster ...

I remember writing in my journal how frustrated I was. Every time I would get started- usually about a week or two into an exercise/diet routine, I would have something de-rail me. Back injury flare-up = 2-3 days on the sofa and another 2-3 days of no upper body challenges... sick with virus would mean at least a week down- a few times it turned into pneumonia. It was always something. My immunity was weak... I was sick all the time. I wanted to quit forever.
I finally found a combination of herbs, teas, and practices that helped me. I found it on my own; things people suggested- trial and error. One time I was so desperate that I promised myself that whatever the next person suggested to me, I would do with no questions asked. The next thing suggested, out of the blue, was for me to try giving up gluten- and that helped me a lot
I was stubborn and wanted doctors to help me... that was sort of a waste of time. They did not have the answers.

Don't give up. Maybe yoga- gentle stretching, and take care of yourself.
Be gentle with yourself.
And patient
and kind.
Peace~

chocoholicdiva · May 2012

Your post is so motivational and thought provoking, I was truly able to relate in a way.

I have epilepsy. I was diagnosed in December 1981 at the age of 3, and I'm now currently 34. Part of my epilepsy makes my life difficult, as I can't do certain things without needing the help of another person. I need help styling my hair, as my condition's affected this part of my brain. I have to go shopping in a wheelchair because the lights affect my seizures. Through my whole educational life up to Grade 12 I was bullied for being different, and I didn't fair off too well from it. Eating was my comfort. That all changed once I went to college. It took a long time for me to gain a backbone, and for my confidence and self esteem to build up over the years, but it finally happened!!! But I still have a few hurdles to go over in life, and epilepsy can be a major stumbling block, no matter how hard you try to get over it, metaphorically speaking of course.

Jennifer

Mompanda4 · May 2012

Bump

TundraTed · May 2012

Excellent Post! Some of us have large challenges in our lives, but keeping the positive attitude is what allows us to overcome them.

For those with disabilities

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