Eating out in a large group

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mightyminerva
mightyminerva Posts: 145 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
Hi, guys. My question relates to eating out at a restaurant on a student budget.

When groups of people and I go out to eat, generally there are a few bottles of wine on the table plus a few appetizers. I've completely cut out alcohol from my diet. I've decided that my strategy will be to eat a small salad at home before leaving the house to calm app cravings.

In a large group of people, how to do you avoid the whole "Let's split the check/cheque evenly, and everybody puts in X amount" thing? I'm living on a student budget, and I don't think I'll be in a position to wait for everything to even out, as I am going to do my best not to get alcohol or appetizers in the future. What's the proper etiquette?

Some advice online says to just put in that amount if no one else speaks up to say, "Sarah (me) didn't drink or eat, so she can put in Y amount." I don't feel comfortable doing that, especially since the money I'd put into apps and drinks is now taken up by buying fresh produce at the grocery store.

Should I be sure to have cash and just ask rather loudly, "Oh, is Y amount okay?"

(The people I usually go out with are also students, and I don't know some of them incredibly well. Close friends know what I'm going through and don't expect me to pay extra for things I don't eat/drink.)

Replies

  • neverstray
    neverstray Posts: 3,845 Member
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    If you're not comfortable being outspoken about it, then pay.

    I would just say, I didn't drink, I didn't eat apps, here's my amount plus tax and tip. Remember though, when you do that to remind the person calculating, that you just changed the avg, so everyone will have to pay a little more. I hate how everyone is shy about money. It really pisses me off that society and politeness have made people suffer over this topic. In many groups I have been in, there were always at least one like that. I never think twice about it. In fact, I'm always impressed hat they speak up.
  • spngebobmyhero
    spngebobmyhero Posts: 823 Member
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    My friends and I just ask for separate checks at the beginning of the meal. It makes it fair for everyone, especially since there are some heavy drinkers in my group.

    But, if that isn't an option, I don't think its a problem to speak up. I try to order cheaper meals and I almost never get an appetizer. If someone who drank a bottle of wine or loaded up on the food wanted to split the check, I'd be a little upset. Ask to put in your fair percentage and suggest separate checks next time.
  • acelynp2
    acelynp2 Posts: 79 Member
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    Is there a discussion at the beginning of the meal as to what to order? If so, then might be the time to say that you are on a restricted diet and will get your own check since you are not going to drink wine/eat apps. That eliminates the whole calculation of you versus them at the end. If you get there late, just ask for your stuff on a separate check when the waitress comes to take your first drink order. Good luck!

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