ladies over 40

karylee44
karylee44 Posts: 892
in Motivation and Support
i told my dear husband that i wanted to join a gym.. he told me i'm not 20 anymore.. why even try..

so my question for those of you over 40.. why are you doing it.. why are you trying to eat well and look great.. seems my dear unsuportive husband cant figure it out.. i would like give him some answers.
«13

Replies

  • Brengild
    Brengild Posts: 127
    Because I want to look good for you dear. I want to be healthy to grow old with you dear. Yeah, mine wouldnt buy that either! Seriously though, just because we arent 20 doesnt mean we need to feel 60!
  • cushygal
    cushygal Posts: 586 Member
    Simply stated - I am doing this for me!! These are the best years of my life and I want to make sure that they last even longer.

    I am 44 and I joined a gym a year ago - its a womans only gym and that was fine when I was less confident about how I exercised, but I will say once this membership expires I will move to a co-ed gym.
  • Dudagarcia
    Dudagarcia Posts: 849 Member
    Because I'm doing it for myself and a happy wife is a happy household :). I do have a supportive hsbd tho :) I don't go to the gym anymore my hubby bought me an elliptical and that's why I was mostly going for. I also w/o to videos.
  • TamaraGraceS
    TamaraGraceS Posts: 273 Member
    LOVE THIS!
    Because I'm doing it for myself and a happy wife is a happy household :). I do have a supportive hsbd tho :)
  • TamaraGraceS
    TamaraGraceS Posts: 273 Member
    I do it for me! I deserve to put myself first and as a wife to one and a mother to 4 I think it makes me a better person.
  • jodi4861
    jodi4861 Posts: 9 Member
    I would have said that when I am healthier and feel better about the way I look , I feel sexier. When I feel sexier, it will benefit you my darling husband.
  • Buddhasmiracle
    Buddhasmiracle Posts: 925 Member
    Get the his and hers copy of "Younger Next Year." And then see what he says. This is about you (and him) going into the best years of your lives. He can either join you or get out of your way. I'm going to be 60 in Sept and my husband is 66. We hit the gym 4-5xs weekly and enjoy biking and swimming.


    You go girl!
  • lilorphann
    lilorphann Posts: 138 Member
    Wow! I'm lucky enough to be doing this WITH my hubby and we support each other! I'm doing this so I can continue to live a long, healthy life with my best friend, so I can one day enjoy grandkids and keep up with them, so I can enjoy traveling more one day once my hubby retires. But I'm not just losing weight on a diet to accomplish those things; I'm changing my life and learning how what I put into my body affects me. I'm giving me and my family a better me!
  • penny01966
    penny01966 Posts: 8
    1) Lifting weights is good as we get older to help prevent osteoporosis. http://www.webmd.com/osteoporosis/living-with-osteoporosis-7/weight-training
    2) and you have access at gyms to all sorts of equipment so you don't get bored with just one or two things at home.
    3) You can also have personal start up sessions with experienced trainers at most gyms to show you how to properly use machines, weights etc.
    4) and because at any age you can set the example for the younger people around you that it's never too late to get healthy!
  • leslisa
    leslisa Posts: 1,350 Member
    First, sad to hear hubby is unsupportive.

    I'm doing this for me. I want to have a better quality of life as I age. I don't need another reason. I do have health issues and certainly they play into it, but I don't need to have a reason to want to be happier and healthier.

    A big {{HUG}} to you. Men can be so dense sometimes.
  • lizziebeth1028
    lizziebeth1028 Posts: 3,602 Member
    Get the his and hers copy of "Younger Next Year." And then see what he says. This is about you (and him) going into the best years of your lives. He can either join you or get out of your way. I'm going to be 60 in Sept and my husband is 66. We hit the gym 4-5xs weekly and enjoy biking and swimming.


    You go girl!

    ^^^^^ You are awesome!!! I'll be 54 in a couple of months and I'll still going strong (been working out since I was 19)
  • geo4314
    geo4314 Posts: 6
    because I want to be healthy,,,we are entering an age where alot of us get sick with ailments of some kind or other,,,,I want to be healthy,,,be able to still keep up and look hot while i am doing it
  • mrsmac69
    mrsmac69 Posts: 6
    I will be 43 in August. Turning 40 was a huge deal for me and decided to kick it's *kitten*.
    I started running the summer I turned 40.
    I now run at least 18km a week and have lost 14 pounds. I'm currently the weight I was when I got married.

    And I"m rocking 40.
    I do it for this reason: "You don't look forty!"
  • gobraves47
    gobraves47 Posts: 213 Member
    To get healthy--these extra pounds are finally causing some health concerns.
  • knittnponder
    knittnponder Posts: 1,953 Member
    I feel better when I work out.

    I don't want to kill him as much when I work out because of all those happy endorphins running around.

    He gets to see me in yoga pants (he likes that part.)

    I have energy and motivation to do lots of other stuff (biking, fishing, camping, hiking, etc.)

    I'm only 41 (Monday) for crying out loud! This fat lady hasn't sung yet and until I'm dead I'm going to keep working to improve myself and my quality of life! If he can't support that then he can at least shut up while I do my thing (although my husband would never deny me something I want for self improvement. And even if he did I lift weights and he knows I'm getting closer and closer to being able to take him! And since he doesn't workout I can run faster and longer than him so he can't run away.) :laugh:

    There are so many studies that show how exercise lengthens life and improves quality of life that his defeatist attitude is just silly.
  • yougojo170
    yougojo170 Posts: 62
    Tell him you are doing it for yourself because you want to look and feel better and because you want to be healthy so you can be around a lot longer. Its just as important now , maybe even more so, than when you were younger, to be fit and healthy. Losing weight is not just about looking good- its about being healthy.:noway:
  • lizziebeth1028
    lizziebeth1028 Posts: 3,602 Member
    I would tell him - I didn't know there was an age restriction on your health and well being!!!! And I'd also have a few other choice words for his unsupportive asinine comment. 40 is young!!!! Hell I'm almost 54 and still working out consistently, going to the gym, doing yoga, running (eh ok more of a slow jog), kickboxing, spinning, strength training ect.

    Your hubby needs to ditch the 'old man' mentally or he WILL be old before his time. Honey if you can afford it (I wouldn't want to advise you to do something that would cause a financial burden on your marriage)....but if you can afford join the gym!!! Have fun, go out and BE YOUNG!!!!!
  • rammsteinsoldier
    rammsteinsoldier Posts: 1,552 Member
    It gives me self-confidence, I am hoping it lengthens my life, and hell I look damn good.
  • Boingo1
    Boingo1 Posts: 205 Member
    because I want to be healthy,,,we are entering an age where alot of us get sick with ailments of some kind or other,,,,I want to be healthy,,,be able to still keep up and look hot while i am doing it


    TOTALLY agree with this ^^^^^^^

    Plus I feel SO much better when I eat better and exercise! I have more energy and motivation. When I eat like a slug and behave like a slug I am not enjoying life.
  • LNPurdie
    LNPurdie Posts: 84 Member
    Why even try?


    Well if my husband said that to me, I would call him a numpty and not validate the question with a response. tbh.

    The right answer however is the truth. So perhaps the question you are looking to answer is "Why am I doing this?"

    My simple truth is, I want people to look at me and think - there is a lady who takes care fo herself. Not sexy, not beautiful - but respect me because I look healthy and fit.

    And the older I get the more I think about the length of my life, I want to BE healthy and live longer. I don't wanna die, I don't want to be late nlife and not able to get around - I don't want to breath heavy when i walk up a hill, and i want to be able to run after my grandchildren!


    Why even try. Why didn't you tug his ear, smile and say softly - what a silly question!



    Have you resisted using the exprerssion on him?
  • Elzecat
    Elzecat Posts: 2,916 Member
    Posts like these remind me why I walked away from an unhealthy relationship 8 years ago...so sorry you hear that kind of crap. Because, it is CRAP. And you know it Kary! There's a huge difference between him saying "why even try" and discouraging you, and people being concerned that you might injure yourself, which is a real issue when you are our age. When I started running 15 or so months ago, my mom was concerned about my age because she thought I would hurt myself--but she got over it very quickly as she watched me lose 40 lbs and gain a healthy lifestyle and new passion for running...the few people in my life who were of the "why try" mentality have been kicked to the curb...
  • mamnboston
    mamnboston Posts: 81
    Sounds like your hubby wants you the way you are for fear if you become too fit, too sexy and too smart, other men will take notice and fly the coop...what is this, the dark ages?
  • orr_stacie
    orr_stacie Posts: 48 Member
    Im doing it so that I can be around for my hubby and little boys for years and years to come. I'm sorry your husband isn't being more supportive of you. Add me as a friend and I would be more than happy to support you!
  • mnharrell
    mnharrell Posts: 3 Member
    On this morning's news was a 76 year old lady who skydives regularly . She said that the key to having fun in your later years is to exercise. When you exercise, you can do anything you want to do! You don't have to be limited by your fears of getting hurt or your inability to perform. So, get up and go exercise, then do something you have always wanted to do!! (That is the reward part!) Example: I am going to go sailing in July! I hope to learn something about handling the boat in the open ocean.
    So...pick a target and go for it!

    :)
    Nan (Will be 54 this month!)
  • ktfitzgerald
    ktfitzgerald Posts: 369 Member
    I’m 42 and I do it because I want to be strong and fit enough to do all the things I’ve never done before that I can finally afford and have time to do…. Kayaking, hiking, sailing, rock climbing!
  • katharineshalia
    katharineshalia Posts: 243 Member
    My hubby wasn't so suppoertive either so I just kept it to myself, started walking in the evening and doing exercise videos when he wasn't around. He's sure noticed it now, now that I threw out all my frumpy old clothes and bought two sizes smaller (yes, they fit), my point is, screw him, he'll come around once you start respecting yourself.
  • ttbauer
    ttbauer Posts: 1
    I'm 47 and I am fortunate enough to have a free gym at work which I try to utilize at least 3 times a week (20 min cardio and about 20 minutes of weights). I've never been "fit" or "athletic" but when the gym closed last Fall, I felt like I needed to keep moving so I started walking, then running 1/2 mile during the walk, then a mile, and so on. Well, I was able to complete a 5K race on Thanksgiving morning. My time was not spectacular but I never got below a jog. What a great way to start the biggest pig-out day of the year! Last month, I completed a 10K! Did I mention that I am 47 and NOT ATHLETIC! You need to do what makes you feel as good on the inside as it does on the outside. While we may not have the bikini bodies of our youth, we aren't in the grave yet either. YOU GO, GIRL!
  • fittocycle
    fittocycle Posts: 827 Member
    I'm 51 and have knee surgery yesterday. Believe me, I cannot wait to get to the gym!! I didn't start working out on a regular basis until I was in my late 30's.


    If your husband needs another reason (besides the excellent ones the others gave you) , you can tell him about my neighbors. He is turning 96 and she will be 90 this year. Until about 5 years ago, he rode a bike quite often. His wife does Jazzercise three times a week, mows the lawn, and shovels snow when one is watching.:wink: She can do all those things because she stays active. And she moves quickly, like someone half her age. I asked her once if she had always been athletic and she said, no, she didn't start working out until her 40's!
  • looopyloops
    looopyloops Posts: 84 Member
    I am 47, I want to be in better shape so that when I need to keep up with my children and grand children I can. I go to the ymca and there are regulars there in their 70's who are in great shape, | hope to be one of those people when I am that age, I want to be able to enjoy retirement when I get there not be stuck on the sidelines watching everyone else have fun. I also do not want to have to deal with health issues such as diabetes and heart disease that run in my family. The health benefits of exercise are one of the best reasons in my opinion to get out and do something like join a gym.
  • JeSuisPrest
    JeSuisPrest Posts: 2,005 Member
    I'm doing it for me!! I was so tired of how felt and how I looked. But you have to want to do this for yourself! You will not be successful doing it for anyone else! You are worth it!!

Categories