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kimberjones
kimberjones Posts: 155
edited September 20 in Motivation and Support
For the last couple of weeks I've had a LOT of trouble getting motivated. I haven't been working out because it seems that life has gotten in the way. I've gone UP two whole pounds and it stinks! I haven't been logging things like I should because I've been having problems with my profile - not really fixed - have to log lunch in the dinner slot but at least its working - and it just seems like it's been hard, hard, hard!!

I have celiac disease and I get to the point where I just want to have something without HAVING to look at the ingredients. It's torture to have my family stop by Bojangles on the way to church and have to hand out the biscuits knowing that I can't have one. It's torture having them stop on the way home from church and getting a snack when most things there I can't have.

Finally I gave in last night and had a piece of pumpkin/chocolate cake :love: with cream cheese frosting that someone brought in. (For those of you who don't know celiac disease is an intolerance of wheat, rye, barley and some oats)

It was not a wise thing to do as my gastrointestinal tract is calling me all sorts of names today :grumble: but I was being stubborn and had a lack of self control (which, incidentally, is what we studied at church last night!).

Isn't this how I got to this weight to start with, though? A lack of self control??? It's been a good revelation for me....

I got my unmotivated behind out today, though, and worked out for about an hour and a half - rode the stationary bike for an hour and then did strength training for 30-45 minutes. It felt SO GOOD to be working out. Why do I dread it sometimes? I guess it's because I'm the only one in my family doing it and sometimes it's hard to go and work out while everyone else sits in front of the TV and eats chips (they don't have the weight issue like I do).

It makes me remember why I'm doing this. It's not for them. It's for me. I want my body to be strong to honor God, to help me do everything I need to do to take care of my family and I want to have a long, healthy, happy life with my husband. If I'm not here ...well it makes that hard.

This is sort of a confession, of sorts, and a sharing of my revelation . Maybe it'll help someone else who is going through the same things. I don't know. I just know that I need to stay busy, stay motivated and keep a constant check on what I'm putting in my body. It's a hassle, yes. Being fat is a bigger hassle. It just depends on which one you'd rather hassle with. I choose hassling with logging food and making sure I exercise. It's less of a hassle than being fat.

Any encouragement would definitely be appreciated. It's tough feeling like I'm all alone in this battle at home. I have a wonderful family but they just don't feel the need to do the things that I do and, although my youngest shares Celiac disease with me, her issue is she's quite thin. I seem to have the opposite problem.

Replies

  • hopeitworks
    hopeitworks Posts: 284 Member
    I'm sorry about the celiac disease - I can't relate to that. But as to not having support, I know what you're going through. My husband will ask my why I'm serving so many vegetables, and will go ahead and eat other things. I've also gotten the comment, "oh, you're going to the gym today?" I sometimes feel guilty, but guess what, I go anyway. You made it through your workout today. Worry about tomorrow, tomorrow. You should feel proud that you did good today and look forward to doing something good again tomorrow. Keep up the good work, and take one day at a time. If you're looking for support, this is the place to be. The support offered by the members here is what gets me through the weight loss journey.
  • pawprint061
    pawprint061 Posts: 640
    That stinks. I have a sister who has Crohn's disease. I can understand it to a point. I also see what happens when you don't take care of your body. My family is living proof... constantly going to the doctors, being 13 and having diabetes. Being 18 and going a strict diet and not abiding by it and getting sick... I have seen it. I made the choice to get fit when I looked at my sister and realized how big she was, and how big I was getting...

    This isn't for them, your right. This is for you. This is not a diet, remember that. This is a lifestyle change. Anyone who says it is a diet isn't ready to go this. Have you tried explaining to your family why you are doing this? That maybe you could use some support? It took my boyfriend a few months to finally start supporting me because he finally saw that I was serious. Now he supports me no matter what.

    Hang in there and don't give up so easy. This is for you. Remember that.
    Good luck.
  • CasperO
    CasperO Posts: 2,913 Member
    Wow,,,, I never gat mad, and I'm a little mad.

    Ok,,, these "people" not supporting you, that happens. You can't expect skinnies to eat healthy just because you drew the short genetic straw and you have to. Fair enough. But sister, they can get their own *$&^% biscuits.

    They want to stop at Greazy McGarbage for a "snack" on the way home from church - maybe laugh at you while they gobble french fries and you fight tears. Ok. Do you have a car? Let 'em stop where ever they want - you take you own wheels, and keep driving. Go somewhere nice, have something healthy.

    I go to church most sundays. My rev talks about self control too. Also talks about love, compassion, taking care of one another. Kindness, consideration. And I listen.
  • ivykivy
    ivykivy Posts: 2,970 Member
    I have been plagued with the I don't wannas. I don't wanna exercise hard; I choose something easy. I don't wanna eat vegetables. I just don't wanna. But I know I gotta at least four days a week. It's the getting started that is hard. I realize I have to get control of myself. That will be my bible study focus this week. It was supposed to be patience (next in the list for Col 3:12). Maybe I'll do both.
    Thanks
  • kimberjones
    kimberjones Posts: 155
    Wow,,,, I never gat mad, and I'm a little mad.

    Ok,,, these "people" not supporting you, that happens. You can't expect skinnies to eat healthy just because you drew the short genetic straw and you have to. Fair enough. But sister, they can get their own *$&^% biscuits.

    They want to stop at Greazy McGarbage for a "snack" on the way home from church - maybe laugh at you while they gobble french fries and you fight tears. Ok. Do you have a car? Let 'em stop where ever they want - you take you own wheels, and keep driving. Go somewhere nice, have something healthy.

    I go to church most sundays. My rev talks about self control too. Also talks about love, compassion, taking care of one another. Kindness, consideration. And I listen.

    My family really is great. When they realize they've asked me to do something that's hard or offer to share something that I can't have (I try to decline politely) they really do feel bad. It's evident in their demeanor and their response. It's just hard for anyone who doesn't have the disease to understand all that it entails - even those who live around it. They don't laugh they just don't realize what they're doing. No, I'm not enabling them, really. We've had these talks. They try to exhibit the kindness and consideration you're talking about - they just forget. It just kind of all fell apart yesterday.

    The talk on lack of self control yesterday just really hit me in the gut. It was a great message - obviously one I need to hear. I just have to keep myself on track and exhibit my self control (not lack of) while I'm taking care of my body. It's just a different world not being able to eat like everyone else - a totally different world. Most days it's bearable and even enjoyable - I love fruits and veggies anyway. Some days, though, it just really stinks. Yesterday was one of those days.

    Thanks to all of you for your encouragement. This is definitely one of those days where I needed it the most!
    :flowerforyou:
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