I'm no longer the "Fat Friend"

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I met this particular very good friend when we were only 8 years old. Living in the same street and going to the same school, we grew up together and hung out every day. She was the tall, blonde, slim, very pretty girl that always got the attention of the boys and I on the other hand was the shorter, brunette, fat girl who never got a second glance from any boys. I'm not sure if she saw it that way but I felt I was always "The Fat Friend". UNTIL RECENTLY... We now work together (a few years older ... 40) and have a weight watchers thing going at our work involving about a dozen people. We have both put on a few kilo's and when started she (of course) weighed in less than me. But not for long. I have been on this weight loss wheel on and off for the past 20+ years where she has only put on in the last few years. So when we started the weight loss program I put all of my heart into it, where she still took it as a joke. Just this week past I weighed in and YES FINALLY I WEIGH LESS THAN HER. I can't believe it, finally I am not the "Fat Friend". I was so excited and felt bad for her but so pleased with myself and now it has been such a motivation to keep going and weight MUCH less than her. I hope I don't sound like a horrible friend but I am so pleased with my efforts and together with this site my mindset has changed so much. Thanks to MFP and all the posters on here for motivation everyday. :smile:

Replies

  • sgv0918
    sgv0918 Posts: 851 Member
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    doesn't sound bad at all. I recently found out i weigh less than a friend from high school and was pumped. She was always the pretty skinny one. Whatever helps to motivate :) Just don't tell her she's the fat friend. Lol
  • themommie
    themommie Posts: 5,023 Member
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    CONGRATS no wonder you are so excited, such a great accomplishment. Keep up the good work. MFP is awesome, together we can do this :smile:
  • Lasirenn
    Lasirenn Posts: 50 Member
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    Congratulations on your progress. My friend's bachelorette party is this weekend, and I'm pretty sure I'm going to be the fat girl out of the group. I'm trying not to feel to sad. The night is about my friend, not me, and I haven't seen my friends/old roommates in so long that I've been lonely. But always feel out of place and somewhat embarrassed going to clubs or bars.
  • taunto
    taunto Posts: 6,420 Member
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    You don't sound like a bad friend at all! You didn't bad mouthed her, just a friendly competition between friends and nothing wrong with that!

    CONGRATULATIONS!! :)
  • DonnaThw
    DonnaThw Posts: 9 Member
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    doesn't sound bad at all. I recently found out i weigh less than a friend from high school and was pumped. She was always the pretty skinny one. Whatever helps to motivate :) Just don't tell her she's the fat friend. Lol

    Ha ha thanks. I actually said "I'm no longer the fat friend" in front of everyone when I stood on the scales. Whoops should have only thought it but out it came. LOL I did think "oh she is the fat friend now" but didn't have the guts to say it to her. I wonder if she thought it?
  • Cal28
    Cal28 Posts: 514 Member
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    I don't think thats bad at all. I'll still be the fat friend when I fly home in July but I'm hoping I won't be the fattest friend :-)
    Congratulations on your progress. My friend's bachelorette party is this weekend, and I'm pretty sure I'm going to be the fat girl out of the group. I'm trying not to feel to sad. The night is about my friend, not me, and I haven't seen my friends/old roommates in so long that I've been lonely. But always feel out of place and somewhat embarrassed going to clubs or bars.

    Aww its awful you feel like that. At the end of the day its not about peoples size but about being happy. I'll always be the biggest out of my group of friends but being happy with yourself is what matters most.
    I know what you mean about being lonely, I move countries 8 month ago and don't have anything like the number of friends I did back home. You're on this journey to become healthy & happy, just remember that this weekend but don't let it spoil your fun. xxx
  • Shanel0916
    Shanel0916 Posts: 586 Member
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    Sounds like you're in your own little competition with her, guess it's good motivation for you. Congrats on your loss.
  • DonnaThw
    DonnaThw Posts: 9 Member
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    It's funny how things change. I used to be the one that needed the motivational talks and never stuck with weight loss, always coming up with excuses to NOT exercise. But now everyone is coming up to me asking for motivation it's so weird. I see myself in them too. They say to me "Oh look at you skinny minnie" and get upset when the scales don't move in the right direction for them. But I just think oh well I'm doing the right thing with my eating and exercise and thats why it's working for me. Maybe they should be putting effort in too and they too would get good results. It's hard to learn how to take compliments when I've never been one to get them, but I'm learning :)
  • corash34
    corash34 Posts: 2 Member
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    Me being your other friend who has always exercised and you telling me how you just cant be bothered at exercising I am very happy that you have felt so motivated this year my friend and you are looking so fantastic from all your efforts. So keep up the good work and soon you will be either past me or we may soon be the same weight which will be awesome. You still amaze me and motivate me everyday with how you succeed and it has been a journey i have loved watching you go through and so much joy in sharing all your success with.
  • sehrler
    sehrler Posts: 89 Member
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    You are right, how things change. When we were 12-25 I was best friends with a girl, she was always a little heavier than I was but BARELY, maybe one size. But after I had my kids at 20 and 21, and gained a ton of weight I was telling her how hard it was to deal with (I was never skinny as a girl, just average weight but suddenly was over 250lbs). She had done WW and lost about 40 lbs, and I had gained 100. She was in med school and I had left college to raise my kids. One day she said to me, "it was always so hard in jr high and high school, you were the pretty skinny blonde with a great butt and could wear the tight jeans (it was the 80s!) and I was heavy and had frizzy brown hair"...I was FLOORED! First of all I was NOT SKINNY. And I thought she was so pretty and confident, and she had never let on that she felt inferior next to anyone. It made me feel bad that even unknowingly I had caused her to feel bad, but I was very happy that she was healthy and feeling good about herself now. And of course in HS I was always feeling not thin enough.

    We are now 44 and I am finally getting back to pre-baby weight--took me a long time to get the proper mindset but when I did, boy I DID! I guess my point is, that it's all perspective--I never knew that in my insecurities as a teen that someone else, let alone one of my closest friends, felt insecure next to me. Crazy.
  • teagensmommy
    teagensmommy Posts: 13 Member
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    Congratulations on your progress. My friend's bachelorette party is this weekend, and I'm pretty sure I'm going to be the fat girl out of the group. I'm trying not to feel to sad. The night is about my friend, not me, and I haven't seen my friends/old roommates in so long that I've been lonely. But always feel out of place and somewhat embarrassed going to clubs or bars.

    I am in the exact same situation!! My best friends bachelorette party is tomorrow and I have gone from the 120 lb "party girl" to this 200 lb mother. I was always thinner than the other girls who will be attending and now am the heaviest of us. Makes me feel really down about myself too!
  • awolf2011
    awolf2011 Posts: 265 Member
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    Congrats to you on your progress!! Sometimes us knowing that we are slimmer than those we hang out with and work with makes us feel good about ourselves. We need this kind of motivation. Keep up the good work!! I am having an awesome day today because one of my co-workers in front of others said to me "you have lost so much weight and are looking so good". The confidence in myself just sky rocketed!! :smile:
  • DonnaThw
    DonnaThw Posts: 9 Member
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    Thank you all so much for your kind words. Having you all on here is a great motivation also :flowerforyou: