I need help and support in a serious kind of way

You can friend me if you like - and I HIGHLY recommend joining the Thirty Somethings group. Really great bunch of people who stay connected and check in pretty much daily. Weekly challenges, monthly goals, and a lot of fun. :flowerforyou:

I feel ya.... I feel the same way right now because it is the end of the school year and a lot is going on... Just keep pushing! Thats what imma do!

You can eat small amounts of sweets at times however when you get the craving to put something sweet in your mouth think of something gross/disturbing that will make you put it down and rethink eating the sweet stuff. You can use it as a visual basic to keep you from being tempted in eating it. This should help but not always. Keep it up you can do it.

Sounds like you're going through a mental break of some sort! I am an emotional eater, and any time I get frustrated, stressed, angry or sad I want to rush to food. I have just within the last month been able to control these cravings with sheer will power and hate for the weakness that it reflects. I have recently quit smoking and drinking because I cannot STAND anything being able to control me. I am a smart young woman and I should not allow myself to be weak and succumb to substances such as food or chemicals. I want to be HEALTHY not skinny. I want to use my body and make it invincible so that I can live a longer, happier life. It was only until I realized long term goals that I was able to say *kitten* off to food. I still indulge once and a while, but get more satisfaction out of being in control of my mind and my decisions. I hope this was in some way helpful to you, and I hope that you can free your mind!

I went through this same thing last month and I ate everything! For me it was depression...I didn't even know it at first but then I realized I was eating my feelings. You may want to ask yourself why you are eating before you get to your next binge. It is really hard sometimes because if you are like me your favorite foods my give you a sense of comfort. I came to a point where I had to ask myself if I liked what I saw in the mirror and the answer was no. I wasn't healthy and I feel my best when I am healthy and I am pretty sure you do too since you asked for help. The next time you consider eating something you feel you shouldn't just take a breath and ask yourself if it is worth it. Feel free to add me if you need some encouragement. :-)

Also, feel free to add me as a friend. A quote I heard recently - "Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels!!"

I'm so sorry you're going through this! And I love that someone quoted what you wrote on your profile page. We fill that out for a reason and sometimes need to take a step back and remember why we came here in the first place. Re-read that paragraph, maybe even revise it if you want but definitely have something there to go back to when you need it.

Now for my advice... There is absolutely nothing wrong with going back to square one. The thought of starting over is this big scary thing and you're doing absolutely everything in your power to avoid it... Maybe you were too strict and hard on yourself? Baby steps are the way to go. Set one goal per week and do your very best to stay with it. You could even give yourself a couple weeks or a month to stick with it if that's a better pace. The point is to start making changes, it doesn't matter how long it takes. This is a lifelong proces of learning and changing so there's no rush.

You may also want to change your calorie goal - find out what your BMR is and set your goal there. It's a healthy goal and will still give you a calorie deficit as all of us move around in some way shape or form during the day. Even if you're sedentary, you're likely to burn a few hundred calories each day.

Some goal ideas for you:
track every day, eat regular meals, don't worry about going over
track every day, try to stay within 200 calories of goal
track every day, try to meet goal at least 3 days

I'm glad you're staying active as that can sometimes be harder to re-start than the healthy eating.

If you can get the bad snacks out of your house for some reason, at least take a little time and portion them out. Sitting in front of the TV with a snack bag of chips is a lot better than sitting there with a huge family sized bag that you end up eating half of.

Find substitutes for your snacks like protein bars, snack bars, 100 calorie packs of cookies, popcorn, almonds, etc

Think about making it more about health and fitness than getting "skinny". That skinny crap never motivated me for long and I never got that quote written above - I'm sorry but pizza and chocolate taste WAY better than I ever remember skinny feeling. I flat out don't care about being skinny but I sure do want to be healthy and fit!