Lost my motivation

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EmmaShorter
EmmaShorter Posts: 298
in Motivation and Support
Hi folks.
So I got married last August and had motivation to lose the weight I had put on since meeting my husband for the wedding. Since then even though I didn't get to target for my wedding (I lost 1 stone (wanted to lose 3)) I have absolutely no motivation. One week I will stick to Slimming world and do ok and then have a bad week and I am back to square one. Last week i put on 7 pound due to having a really bad week and not sticking to plan at all. Then this week I had a half and half week and stayed the same. Enough is enough I need to get to target. I want to see a steady weight loss and get to target.
Also I was doing loads of exercise before my wedding to help my weight loss and I have lost all motivation and energy to do that now.
So what I am asking for is help to get my motivation back please. Any suggestions welcome! Thanks

Replies

  • psideon
    psideon Posts: 24
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    It's easy to "settle down" after you get married as you might not feel the pressure to attract your partner any more. I fell into the same pit (for 10 years!!!). Paying for it now.

    Some of my motivators as a married man:
    1. Get healthier so I can enjoy more time with my wife.
    2. Live longer for my kids (when we decide to have them)
    3. Living healthy will motivate each other and healthy couples are happy couples.
    4. Can't stop hearing "You're HOT!" enough... SUPER motivating, this one (although it's a flat out lie... for now)

    Try to get your husband into it and motivate each other.

    If all else fails, do it for yourself... 1 lb. a week as a starting goal, then add bells and whistles later.

    Good luck, keep the faith and Get Moving!!!
  • EmmaShorter
    EmmaShorter Posts: 298
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    Try to get your husband into it and motivate each other.

    He is skinny and can eat all the junk he wants. He is very dependent on sugary things and often says he is going to give it up but doesn't as he doesn't need to (his insides might disagree)
  • wasveganvictoria88
    wasveganvictoria88 Posts: 249 Member
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    If you need a friend I'm always here :) I found it really difficult to find motivation - and then I thought...either I start now and look forward to feeling healthy and SEXY. Or I can just think about it. I chose the first. Its a slow process but I'm gonna get there.
  • kmorris123
    kmorris123 Posts: 34 Member
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    I'm in a similar boat, although my lack of motivation doesn't involve a marriage. We are out for summer and I'm a teacher. While in school I was doing very well, losing up to 35 pounds. Now I'm home and have no motivation. I don't have the support in place I had daily at school. I hope you find your motivation. I am trying to motivate myself with a new pair of shoes if I can drop to 199.
  • EmmaShorter
    EmmaShorter Posts: 298
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    I am a teacher too so I am quite stressed at the moment which doesn't help!
  • cjmas
    cjmas Posts: 63
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    I think the real trick with motivation is that it has to come from YOU.

    People can give you reasons why you should commit to something (diet, exercise, study, practice, etc.), but unless you find that inner drive... it's just words.

    I hit a plateau recently, but pushed past to lose another two pounds. I need to lose 30 more and I assure you: I will make it happen. I'm highly motivated, but my reasons won't mean anything to you.

    Would something like training for a race, (5k, 10k, half marathon, sprint triathlon, whatever) motivate you? Sometimes that works for people, because they are training for an event set on a certain date, it requires a lot of exercise, and if you track your calories, the weight loss is almost incidental. Then, you can pick another event after that to train for.

    Good luck. I don't really think anyone else can motivate you, but you can certainly find encouragement here...
  • StrawberrySuzyQ
    StrawberrySuzyQ Posts: 107 Member
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    I think the real trick with motivation is that it has to come from YOU.

    Good luck. I don't really think anyone else can motivate you, but you can certainly find encouragement here...

    I totally agree! You have to provide the motivation, but that doesn't mean you can't have cheerleaders along the way. Think about what it is that you really want to do: have a healthy BMI, be at a healthy weight for your height, get into that cute new swimsuit, wear that sexy black dress, have the energy to run around with the kids (nieces, nephews, others, etc.).

    And the biggest thing to do is to change how you THINK! If you think of something as "a diet" and then say: "I cannot have cake (candy, whatever you always crave) because it will blow my diet" you are surely going to fail because in your mind you have convinced yourself that you have had to give up something you love.

    Change your thinking to: I am going to work at eating more healthy foods and less processed items. I will work to incorporate more fresh fruits and vegetables into my diet and leave that piece of cake (or whatever) for a special occasion. Also don't think of food as a reward. Make a contract with yourself: If you eat healthy for the majority of the week (5-6 out of 7 days) then splurge and get yourself a little treat like a magazine or book you've been wanting to get or a manicure or pedicure as your reward.

    I'm not going to lie and say it is easy. Many of us struggle with this daily and sometimes, if not almost always, the motivation needs to come from you and you just get up and go do what you know NEEDS to be done.

    Here if you need a little kick in the butt to keep you on track. Lord knows I've needed it, and sometimes still do, myself!
  • dberry01
    dberry01 Posts: 18 Member
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    Sometimes it just takes one thing to get you back on track. My husband and I are working 7 days a week right now so my motivation was next to nothing because i didn't think I had anything left to give.
    I worked the early shift today so I came home and transplanted my sunflowers. I have been looking at an exercise video set for a month now and thought 'why not?'. Once I started, I couldn't let the video beat me (even though no one else was home) and I thought that I was going to die. BUT I DID IT! And I plan on doing it again.

    Best of luck. Hope that helped.
  • WyLd_ReD
    WyLd_ReD Posts: 24 Member
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    I really hope that you find something to motivate you... I know how hard it can be. I personally had lost 65lbs previous to meeting my husband and with some health problems and surgeries gained it all back and then some! Ummm, I must admit my motivation was my husband leaving me (by no fault of my own, he just decided he didn't want me to be his wife anymore and that we make better friends). It's quite horrible that it took that for my motivation to kick in to overdrive and I would NEVER suggest it to anyone.

    Personally, knowing I weigh in and lose (even if it's 0.6 lbs) makes me so happy it keeps me motivated to do better every week! I also walk my dog regularly and we just take extra long walks now... It's the little things that can make the bigger picture easier.

    Good luck dear! :happy:
  • ecoamiga
    ecoamiga Posts: 1
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    I'm a teacher, three. School is when I gain weight. Summer is when I get motivated, so maybe we can encourage each other. I'm a bridesmaid in 3 weeks and really need to lose at least 5 lbs to feel like I'm getting back on track. My profile pic is supposed to be motivation, but maybe I need a picture of me in a bathing suit. I'm happy to send reminders and notes to help you workout and stay on track if you want to do the same for me. I'm very rural and have no support. Thanks!
  • Crochetluvr
    Crochetluvr Posts: 3,143 Member
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    I think the real trick with motivation is that it has to come from YOU.

    Agreed! I am not saying that suggestions cant be made (I hung the bathing suit I want to get into on my bedroom door as a reminder), but in the end is WE who have to do the deed, as they say. This site does help....just reading it keeps me away from food. :)
  • merew19
    merew19 Posts: 21
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    I am so on the same page here...I was super motivated, lost 4 lbs the first week and was so excited and was like "YES I can do this, I WILL do this" and then I gained 2 lbs back - HOW I have no idea, cause I didn't do terribly bad on my cheat days, and I have been exercing like crazy. Even this week I've been so faithful to healthy eating and exercising and I haven't lost a lbs - not sure why or what is going on.

    So that's why I come here too...to show support and get support...these people here on MFP have been great to offer advice and help me along. YES motivation comes from WITHIN, but it's nice to have someone kick you in your butt here and there to push you along even more!

    Good Luck!!! I'm here if you need a motivator and support!
  • Prilla04
    Prilla04 Posts: 174 Member
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    It's easy to "settle down" after you get married as you might not feel the pressure to attract your partner any more. I fell into the same pit (for 10 years!!!). Paying for it now.

    Some of my motivators as a married man:
    1. Get healthier so I can enjoy more time with my wife.
    2. Live longer for my kids (when we decide to have them)
    3. Living healthy will motivate each other and healthy couples are happy couples.
    4. Can't stop hearing "You're HOT!" enough... SUPER motivating, this one (although it's a flat out lie... for now)

    Try to get your husband into it and motivate each other.

    If all else fails, do it for yourself... 1 lb. a week as a starting goal, then add bells and whistles later.

    Good luck, keep the faith and Get Moving!!!

    I LOVE this reply!!!!
  • ivonne56
    ivonne56 Posts: 42 Member
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    You have to remember why you want to loose weight every single day. Loosing weight is a mind set, you have to want to be healthy, feel better about yourself. When I find myself loosing motivation I log onto MFP and read all the posts of people who have lost 5lbs or 98lbs and I say to myself that will be me one day.. Its okay to have a cheat day or week as long as you dont just give up on yourself...
  • gregavila
    gregavila Posts: 725 Member
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    You need to figure out you WHY... Why is your own health and fitness important to you?

    Without a need or desire to actually change yourself, this is a very difficult task. Your husband cannot be your motivation, nor can a short-term goal that then disappears (though it's good to set temporary goals). It has to come from within, and has to be enough of a priority in your life?

    Why do you want to be healthy? Why do you want to be fit? WHY shouldn't making yourself become the person you've dreamed of be important to you?

    I actually just created a short video on my story and my WHY. http://animoto.com/play/1KN3kNSiHmE0i4o1cvBf5w
  • EmmaShorter
    EmmaShorter Posts: 298
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    Woke this morning. Contemplated getting up and eating a big healthy breakfast then doing a workout later, ended up deciding to get dressed right away into workout gear. Had an apple then did a workout. Then I had a healthy brunch. Got my lunch prepared for when i have finished my tutoring session too. Best get going
  • Capt_Apollo
    Capt_Apollo Posts: 9,026 Member
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    inspiration come from the outside, motivation comes from within.
  • Misslisat
    Misslisat Posts: 203 Member
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    Hey - I think I found your motivation. It was hiding behind that thing called life and the daily grind. But you know what? It's there. I had no self-discipline and zero motivation...until I was diagnosed with a rare condition. The neurologist said "lose weight" and we'll see if your eyesight can be saved. Uh, my motivation was screaming "LET ME OUT". It was unleashed. In just 2 months time I've lost over 25" and about 20 pounds. Please don't let it be something so scary as a doctor giving you a diagnosis you don't want to hear. You can do it and we are all here to support you!!
  • EmmaShorter
    EmmaShorter Posts: 298
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    So I have had two days of sticking to slimming world and did a kettleworx dvd Thursday and zumba tonight. Let's hope my motivation is back for good

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