Whats the best way to be creepy?

13

Replies

  • sktllmdrhmz
    sktllmdrhmz Posts: 1,799 Member
    That green m&m is sexy...
  • WifeNMama
    WifeNMama Posts: 2,876 Member
    When she sees you looking at her through the window, instead of running, just keep looking. And never, EVER break eye contact.

    Or you could be strike up a platonic, jovial friendship with a woman for 8 months on a fitness site and then just randomly write on her wall that you want to wear her. That works, trust me. :wink:

    1.. 2.., ok, just trying to remember how long we have been friends. I don't want to go too fast.
    Ha! You.
  • WifeNMama
    WifeNMama Posts: 2,876 Member
    Boy you're right. That would be pretty creepy.

    smh.
    Your halo's getting bumped off by those horns...
  • california_peach
    california_peach Posts: 1,809 Member
    1. Own a white panel van

    2. Move into your mother's basement

    3. Purchase some safety glasses

    4. Wear sweater vest

    5. Purchase large doll collect

    6. Speak often of your love for Toddlers and Tiaras
  • 180farm
    180farm Posts: 230
    The second time you're introduced to someone and you say nice to see you again just stare up and down their body and after a minute say "I'm not so good with names but bodies... I never forget" when they tell you how rude that was reply, "no it's not. I'm a mortician. It's my job."

    I work in a courthouse and an attorney said this to me. He does own a funeral home but that still didn't make it right. Wrong, just so wrong. Now I'm too creeped out to die.
  • elcyclista
    elcyclista Posts: 393
    Have a conversation with yourself. Every time you meant to say "I", say "Smeagle" instead.
  • hardkitty
    hardkitty Posts: 25 Member
    Wearing a wedding dress on a first date usually does it... Especially if you're a man haha
  • Fieldsy
    Fieldsy Posts: 1,105 Member
    go to a Chuckie Cheese when you don't have kids
  • hadesflame
    hadesflame Posts: 93 Member
    Make sure this is the only vehicle you own:

    images?q=tbn:ANd9GcT0z8CsZKNaS472b3jz3EG8qvO7vVJCjOCfhlK5Ghj6kgZIVFID

    And spray paint "FREE CANDY" on the side.
    Don't forget "puppies inside"
  • njmp
    njmp Posts: 277 Member
    Have a conversation with yourself. Every time you meant to say "I", say "Smeagle" instead.
    That is AWESOME. Speaking in the 3rd person is pretty creepy actually, especially if done repetitively
    "Smeagle thinks we should go for a ride in Smeagle's van..."
  • hadesflame
    hadesflame Posts: 93 Member
    "Now pull your waistband up like you expecting a flood
    Stick your hair down flat like it was covered in mud
    Trim up your pencil mustache and pop them peepers
    Put this in your speakers, you a certified creeper"

    Just listened to this, and had to reply to this topic :)
    Love this song!!

    Don't forget to smile......
  • llahairdna
    llahairdna Posts: 502 Member
    Make sure this is the only vehicle you own:

    images?q=tbn:ANd9GcT0z8CsZKNaS472b3jz3EG8qvO7vVJCjOCfhlK5Ghj6kgZIVFID

    And spray paint "FREE CANDY" on the side.

    This makes you a pedophile, not creepy.


    Just add "ladies" to the end of any sentence. Even the most innocent of statements can sound creepy.

    "Looks like rain.....ladies"

    Finish it with a wink and you're golden. ;)

    Um, I may be completely off-base here, but I think pedophiles are creepy.
  • sktllmdrhmz
    sktllmdrhmz Posts: 1,799 Member
    Um, I may be completely off-base here, but I think pedophiles are creepy.

    pedobear_by_florinu123-d4n8v68.jpg
  • L00py_T0ucan
    L00py_T0ucan Posts: 1,378 Member

    Or you could be strike up a platonic, jovial friendship with a woman for 8 months on a fitness site and then just randomly write on her wall that you want to wear her. That works, trust me. :wink:

    ^ whoa. whoa. though that can be interpreted in other ways, my mind immediately goes to Silence of the Lambs. eeeeessshhhh! :huh: :laugh: :noway:
  • mtaylor33557
    mtaylor33557 Posts: 542 Member
    When she sees you looking at her through the window, instead of running, just keep looking. And never, EVER break eye contact.

    This made me laugh out loud a little! :laugh:
  • mtaylor33557
    mtaylor33557 Posts: 542 Member
    Make sure this is the only vehicle you own:

    images?q=tbn:ANd9GcT0z8CsZKNaS472b3jz3EG8qvO7vVJCjOCfhlK5Ghj6kgZIVFID

    And spray paint "FREE CANDY" on the side.

    This makes you a pedophile, not creepy.


    Just add "ladies" to the end of any sentence. Even the most innocent of statements can sound creepy.

    "Looks like rain.....ladies"

    Finish it with a wink and you're golden. ;)

    I think I heard Demetri Martin do a skit on this...
  • auticus
    auticus Posts: 1,051 Member
    what's the best way to be creepy?

    Be unattractive and hit on someone.
  • AtticusFinch
    AtticusFinch Posts: 1,262 Member
    I hate getting random PM's from guys asking if I want to see their d***!

    That is so random, why would anyone think that's a good idea, or a chat up technique? And why aren't there any female creepers who offer the same service? (I guess the reason is most female Mfp members are mentally balanced)
  • Donnacoach
    Donnacoach Posts: 540 Member
    Stare, and in your best Joey voice say, "How you doin?" LOL
  • aj_31
    aj_31 Posts: 994 Member
    Creepers can't give away their creeping secrets. Then we'd all know who is creeping.
  • BenDyer
    BenDyer Posts: 13
    become a ventriloquist and get one of those classic wooden dummies, and take it on a first date with you, and as you are talking, fondle the dummies crotch constantly and grin slightly. I promise you will never get laid
  • Blaqheart
    Blaqheart Posts: 235
    :Slowly creeps quietly back out the door: o.O
  • MassiveDelta
    MassiveDelta Posts: 3,271 Member
    Creepers can't give away their creeping secrets. Then we'd all know who is creeping.

    you can tell me in PM ... :)
  • aj_31
    aj_31 Posts: 994 Member
    Creepers can't give away their creeping secrets. Then we'd all know who is creeping.

    you can tell me in PM ... :)

    Lol well I would but I don't have any secrets. I'm not a creeper.....or am I??
  • sktllmdrhmz
    sktllmdrhmz Posts: 1,799 Member
    Creepers can't give away their creeping secrets. Then we'd all know who is creeping.

    I just creep openly. They just think it's a joke. :D
  • TK266
    TK266 Posts: 3,638 Member
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tLPZmPaHme0 this is a good primer.

    But I found being a middle-aged Star Wars Fan, D&D enthusiast and Boy Scout leader works well to creep people out :laugh: :laugh:

    memes-ill-never-tell.jpg
  • amymarie8709
    amymarie8709 Posts: 329 Member
    Is it really so hard to be creepy? Allow me to demonstrate.
    ironanimal... its 11:30 at night.. i'm about to go to sleep... pretty sure what you posted will succeed in giving me nightmares! lol

    Hey! You're Irish! I love Irish people. My cousin is half Irish. You're so cool! Don't Irish people drink a lot?
    Anyway, we should go out drinking together sometime. I know you're a bit young and it's going to be long distance because I'm in the states, but I really think we can make this work. I have it all planned out actually. Just accept my friend request and we'll talk about it.
    P.S. Wow! I was just randomly browsing on Kayak.com and I noticed flight tickets to Ireland are only $600. What a bargain right?!

    SUCCESS!!
  • amymarie8709
    amymarie8709 Posts: 329 Member
    Make sure this is the only vehicle you own:

    images?q=tbn:ANd9GcT0z8CsZKNaS472b3jz3EG8qvO7vVJCjOCfhlK5Ghj6kgZIVFID

    And spray paint "FREE CANDY" on the side.
    LOVE THIS!!
  • misschubbybutterfly
    misschubbybutterfly Posts: 75
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tLPZmPaHme0 this is a good primer.

    But I found being a middle-aged Star Wars Fan, D&D enthusiast and Boy Scout leader works well to creep people out :laugh: :laugh:

    memes-ill-never-tell.jpg

    Why is it that people who play D&D past age 20 are considered creepy? I hope I'm not creepy ::sadface::


    Now, if you want creepy....

    hi-can-i-come-in-hi-can-i-come-in-creepy-guy-hairless-demotivational-poster-1242253514.jpg
  • saxmaniac
    saxmaniac Posts: 1,133 Member
    Flirting is almost entirely contextual - it doesn't matter what you say, really. But rather how, when, and why you say it. (I've said "Woo, nice tits" to women, while comically gawking at their chest, and got a laugh out of them.)

    Creepiness is not understanding the social context, and flirting anyway.

    Some of the best male flirts are the people who understand the context, but then choose to break social convention anyway. I won't name names here...

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