I'm totally disgusted!

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I decided not to move until May when my daughter is finished with school...I moved around a lot when I was a kid and had to change schools at the end of the year and it sucked!
It seems though, that my husband (can't think of anything NICE to say about him, so I'm going to keep my mouth shut:indifferent: ) is going out of his way to drive me friggin' crazy until then.
I had to go shoe-shopping with my older daughter, and he said, "I'll clean the kitchen and fold the laundry, and have Jennifer *my youngest* in bed when you get back". MY BUTT he did!!!!
When I got back from the shoe store, he was laying on the couch and NOTHING was done!!! It is now 11 pm and I have at least another hour's worth of crap to do before I can even think about being "off the clock" for the evening. I have a good mind to let all this mess sit until tomorrow...why not, that's what he would do!

Should I fight fire with fire, and just do what he does (the BARE minimum), or should I just continue to do everything? I don't think I should continue to bring my "A game" when he won't even lift a finger or make an effort!!!


Seriously wanting to hit something (or someone...but he's sleeping:explode: :mad: :devil: ),
GTO

Replies

  • GTOgirl1969
    GTOgirl1969 Posts: 2,527 Member
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    I decided not to move until May when my daughter is finished with school...I moved around a lot when I was a kid and had to change schools at the end of the year and it sucked!
    It seems though, that my husband (can't think of anything NICE to say about him, so I'm going to keep my mouth shut:indifferent: ) is going out of his way to drive me friggin' crazy until then.
    I had to go shoe-shopping with my older daughter, and he said, "I'll clean the kitchen and fold the laundry, and have Jennifer *my youngest* in bed when you get back". MY BUTT he did!!!!
    When I got back from the shoe store, he was laying on the couch and NOTHING was done!!! It is now 11 pm and I have at least another hour's worth of crap to do before I can even think about being "off the clock" for the evening. I have a good mind to let all this mess sit until tomorrow...why not, that's what he would do!

    Should I fight fire with fire, and just do what he does (the BARE minimum), or should I just continue to do everything? I don't think I should continue to bring my "A game" when he won't even lift a finger or make an effort!!!


    Seriously wanting to hit something (or someone...but he's sleeping:explode: :mad: :devil: ),
    GTO
  • abetterme
    abetterme Posts: 393
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    I am so sorry you are having to go through this.

    How much fighting do want to do while you are still there?? Please don't fight infront of the kids either. I have only got a couple of your post so I don't have a lot of advice. It just depends on how much you want to put up with while you stay there.

    Good luck and I will be praying for you.
    HUGS
  • Helawat
    Helawat Posts: 605 Member
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    That's a good question, should I fight fire with fire? I would advise you to not stoop down to his level and continue to bring your A-game; don't allow him to make you feel that you no longer need to do your best, you always need to do your best regardless of the situation.

    Gandhi said, "An eye for an eye, and soon the whole world is blind" in reference to nonviolent resistance. Fight your battles by doing for own form of nonviolent resistance. I don't mean resist doing what needs to be done but you need to resist not doing your best because your former half isn't pulling his weight.

    Your natural pugnacity needs to be channeled to doing your best, not stooping to his level. It's lonely at that level and he's only seeking company. :flowerforyou:
  • GTOgirl1969
    GTOgirl1969 Posts: 2,527 Member
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    I'm trying my best to just bide my time, and bite my tongue, but when he is flagrantly trying to pi*s me off, it's sort of hard to just let it slide. uggggggggghh....I hope he isn't this much of a jerk to the NEXT woman he tries to BS!!

    Maybe I should put all the dirty dishes and laundry on the bed so when he drags his self in there, it'll be waiting:devil: :laugh:
  • sculley
    sculley Posts: 2,012 Member
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    I am going through the same crud with my soon to be ex husband. It really makes no different how much you tell them what they are doing wrong it's just some of them want to piss us off it seems. I am sorry to bring my negativity to the post and I am sorry you are dealing with it as well. I am about sick of biting my tongue so your a better person than I.
  • Helawat
    Helawat Posts: 605 Member
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    I'm trying my best to just bide my time, and bite my tongue, but when he is flagrantly trying to pi*s me off, it's sort of hard to just let it slide. uggggggggghh....I hope he isn't this much of a jerk to the NEXT woman he tries to BS!!

    Maybe I should put all the dirty dishes and laundry on the bed so when he drags his self in there, it'll be waiting:devil: :laugh:

    hehe, putting all the dirty dishes on the bed...I never thought about doing that.

    Girl, do what you need to do :)
  • GTOgirl1969
    GTOgirl1969 Posts: 2,527 Member
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    hehe, putting all the dirty dishes on the bed...I never thought about doing that.

    Girl, do what you need to do :)

    Who knew that one person could dirty up five plates, three cups, and 2 pots??? to eat one meal???!?!??
  • Helawat
    Helawat Posts: 605 Member
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    What the hell? Apparently, he's trying really hard to piss you off. You could always put the dirty dishes in her car so when he goes to work in the morning he can deal with them then :)
  • GTOgirl1969
    GTOgirl1969 Posts: 2,527 Member
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    If her car looks anything like she does, it's nasty enough already...it probably has stuff living in it:laugh:

    Her skankiness is just proof that men don't cheat for "better", they cheat for "different". I kept telling him..."Why go out for a hamburger when you have filet mignon at home?"
  • Helawat
    Helawat Posts: 605 Member
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    Yeah, you might catch the walking coodies by touching his car.

    What does he say when you tell him that? Does he respond with a smart *kitten* comment or just shrug you off?
  • commonsensefitness
    commonsensefitness Posts: 105 Member
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    GTO my wife has similar complaints about me dirting so many dishes to eat just one thing. Its universal.
  • GTOgirl1969
    GTOgirl1969 Posts: 2,527 Member
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    Yeah, you might catch the walking coodies by touching his car.

    What does he say when you tell him that? Does he respond with a smart *kitten* comment or just shrug you off?

    He doesn't say anything...that's how I know that he knows I am 100% right...
    And I know he isn't sitting his stank a*s in MY car, that's for sure...I may get cooties!
  • Helawat
    Helawat Posts: 605 Member
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    I do give you a lot of credit for staying there. I would have to be out of the house.

    I know you do it for your daughter's school and everything but how do you tolerate it without dabbling in homicide?
  • GTOgirl1969
    GTOgirl1969 Posts: 2,527 Member
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    I am trying to be very "Zen" about it, but to quote Hyde from "That 70's Show",

    "Where Zen ends.....asskicking begins!"
  • my2girls0507
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    I feel your pain. My husband decides that he'll make this fantastic dinner and uses almost ever dish and then leaves the mess for me to clean up. He comes home from work and lays down wherever and goes to sleep. It is so irritating and I really just want to kick him in his head!!!!
  • beep
    beep Posts: 1,242 Member
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    I'm rooting for you.