MFP old-timer needing help with goals and motivation

BerryH
BerryH Posts: 4,698 Member
edited December 21 in Motivation and Support
After stalling a bit, I had a very successful reset by doing two weeks at maintenance then returned to a 0.5lb a week loss. The intention was I'd come out of it with new enthusiasm, new goals, a revived exercise regime and an updated profile. However, it coincided with illness and injury and I'm somewhat less than inspired.

I got back back to pre-reset weight, but I've stalled again due solely to incomplete logging. I've lost my oomph. Part of that is due to the fact I still can't decide my exercise goals, and without a heap of exercise calories I'm hungry and embarrassed to track the fact I fail to stay under my calorie targets.

The problem is I've gone off running. I got injured marathon training earlier this year and just don't want to push the big miles any more. Even 5K races seem unappealing at the moment. At first I loved being able to pick and chose different bits of cardio and resistance training as I felt, but I don't have any bigger picture to keep me going, if you see what I mean.

I've got a London Marathon ill or injured deferred place sitting in my inbox I need to reply to by the end of the month, but the thought of spending up to 5 hours every Sunday in the dark and sleet, hail and snow again horrifies me, not to mention forking out £32 again when I might not compete come the day.

I think the general "blah" is motivated by the fact that I started out with a wardrobe full of size 16s and 18s (US size 12/14) and having sneaked into a few 14s (US 10), I yesterday took delivery of some size 14s from a firm I thought "came up large" but none of them fitted. So I'm effectively where I started, in size 16, and with no new clothes as I promised myself I'd never buy any more 16s :ohwell:

I've also failed to meet my health-related goals of a healthy BMI (about 7lbs to go) or waist size (34" and should be 31").

So I'm asking you, friends, do you have any suggestions for motivating goals, fitness or weight-loss wise that will get me back on track? I shall use your inspiration to update my profile and goals this weekend, I promise :flowerforyou:
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Replies

  • mousepaws22
    mousepaws22 Posts: 380 Member
    Berry, I am in exactly the same situation as you. I lost 27 pounds last year and have now put 9 of them back on Since march. Every time I step on the sales I'm horrified but it doesn't seem to be enough to kick me up the a**e enough to get going again. I don't even want to go be a bridesmaid at my sisters wedding now because I will look horrific in my dress and next to all the other size 10 bridesmaids. I have no idea where to start again so anybody's sugestions will be helpful! Food is my biggest problem- I eat too much of it and the wrong things!
  • Aperture_Science
    Aperture_Science Posts: 840 Member
    bump....

    I really want to post an answer on this thread but need to think about it before I do.
  • MrsSWW
    MrsSWW Posts: 1,585 Member
    Sorry to hear you're still feeling in a bit of a slump, Berry, I'd hoped that your disappointment at not taking part in the marathon might have passed.

    Do you have a bike? I think you enjoyed running as much as anything because you could feel the miles whizzing away beneath your feet - perhaps cycling would have the same effect but without the impact on your knees.

    I'm sorry to say that it doesn't matter if you put yourself to lose 5lbs a week, unless you're honest with your logging it just don't work - you've seen my diary, sometimes it's so ugly even I recoil in horror, but it's the only way to hold yourself accountable :flowerforyou:
  • BerryH
    BerryH Posts: 4,698 Member
    Sorry to hear you're still feeling in a bit of a slump, Berry, I'd hoped that your disappointment at not taking part in the marathon might have passed.

    Do you have a bike? I think you enjoyed running as much as anything because you could feel the miles whizzing away beneath your feet - perhaps cycling would have the same effect but without the impact on your knees.

    I'm sorry to say that it doesn't matter if you put yourself to lose 5lbs a week, unless you're honest with your logging it just don't work - you've seen my diary, sometimes it's so ugly even I recoil in horror, but it's the only way to hold yourself accountable :flowerforyou:
    I had a bike from my tri days, but I just don't enjoy cycling (has a lot to do with London roads) so I sold it earlier this year. I have a stationery bike that's quite useful for whiling away some catch-up TV time!

    Sad but true about the logging. I hereby promise to log everything, however ugly, starting today. It will be grim from tonight (drinks and dinner with old friends) to Wednesday (three-day work trip to Paris), but it'll get me back in the habit so when I'm back to normaility I can try and hit my goals again. :flowerforyou:
  • KellyBurton1
    KellyBurton1 Posts: 529 Member
    Im with you, I've been here for over 2 years and lost some weight with MFP and I to ended up with injuries through excerise. Theres days I feel like a 90 year old woman. I dont want to keep doing that to my body. I ended up falling off the wagon for a long peroid. When I decided to get back at it again about a month ago, I just keep seeing the scale move up. I stayed out of the 200's for over a year and this morning I weighed in at exactly 200lbs. Im so discouraged that it scares me. I've gain back 18lbs this year. I wish I had advice for you, heck I wish I had advice for me. I need to keep going in fear more will creep back on. I wish you answers and hope maybe I can learn from your post as well. Good luck!
  • Prudiddy
    Prudiddy Posts: 262 Member
    Hello, I'm glad that you have reached out for help! Thanks for being honest about what is going on. My only advise is to jump back into it like crazy. You fell off the ban-wagon and now it's time to jump back on. No more half stepping. You are going to have to log everything weather you like it or not. Open up that food diary and make yourself accountable so everyone can see, this will motivate you even more to do the right thing. We are all in this together. 5 days will go by like that.. You will start seeing results, I hate to always sound like some know it all motivator all the time, but this is true, you get off track, you get back on, stick with it, and watch the results. Your body knows what it was used to before, you may see even greater success if you kick in full gear. I will keep up with you and try to motivate you as I can. Remember, Big baby steps, I say that because we all know there is no half way to doing this thing. We have to be honest with our logging and consistant with our working out. Please don't take this the wrong way and try not to feel as if I'm being too hard on you, YOU CAN DO IT! WE ARE ROOTING FOR YOU.
  • SassyCalyGirl
    SassyCalyGirl Posts: 1,932 Member
    join a challenge group for motivation and accountability!
  • Natty0506
    Natty0506 Posts: 103 Member
    I think you just need to find something to work towards whether it be a trip that you've been wanting to take or the promise of a new wordrobe. If you can't come up with a goal, it'll just seem like there's an indefinite black hole. And take small steps. Start with some strength training and some light cardio, and go harder from there. You can do it! And having a calendar to mark off every day that you complete your goal might also help. I have one that's a 100 day goal chart and I cross off each day that I work out and eat healthy. It helps keep my motivation up.
  • libland
    libland Posts: 284 Member
    Same boat here. I found that marathon training doesn't help me lose weight. As much as I hate it, strength training is the way to go. I find that I lose weight if I keep running to an hour or less three times a week and do strength training on other days. My diet has become a nighmare again and I am not regularly logging. I am at the start of a four day weekend so I plan on focusing on my eating and logging everything. Hopefully, this will get me back on track.
  • LindsayHowlett
    LindsayHowlett Posts: 44
    Hi Berry,
    Sorry to hear you're struggling at the moment! I've been in a bit of a slump for a couple of weeks, pulled muscle, father in law in hospital & then a cold and tonsillitis all taking their toll so I have a bit of an insight as to how you might be feeling.
    Is your injury preventing you from getting back to the running, or even the fear of the injury? Could you try something different, to kick start your love affair with exercise again, maybe swimming could be worth a look, it's low impact, good calorie burn and a full body work out....
    Without seeing your diary it's hard to know what sort of choices you make on the days when exercise isn't an option, but to avoid that "shame" of going over your cals are there any substitutions/better choices you can make to keep the hunger under control whilst remaining in your calorie goals?
    Mainly though I just wanted to say well done, it must be hard at the moment, but you want to get back on the wagon and that's the most important thing!!
    Oh and as for your 7+ hours to finish the marathon, you seem to be neglecting a rather important point - you FINISHED the London marathon, that's a definite success!!!!!!!
  • Dragonfly1996
    Dragonfly1996 Posts: 196 Member
    Sorry to hear you are struggling too. I know how u feel I have been the same since doing London & summoning up motivation is hard!! Think we just have to stick with it & hope it passes!! Like the comment on here about 3 runs a week of less than an hour & strength training. I may try that & hope it kick starts the running & weightloss!!! Sorry I can't be of more help to u on this occasion but will continue to support!!! Hopefully the rain will sod off, summer will return & we will both feel better about it!!! :flowerforyou: x
  • mikeyrp
    mikeyrp Posts: 1,616 Member
    How is your swimming with your injury? if your running is reduced and you can get hold of a bike how about signing up for another triathlon?
  • gatorginger
    gatorginger Posts: 947 Member
    I exercise very moderately by only walking 25 minutes 4 days a week. This has been a change of eating habits for me not a diet. So maybe you need to look at it that way as a change of eating habits and work up to what your maintenance level would be. I only started out at 1000 calories a day because before I joined mfp I wasn't eating much anyways so I started low, I have now lost all the weight I need and now I am increasing my calories because I want to eat more. I first increased my calories 2 weeks ago by 100 more a day and I still lost so now today I have increased it another 100 a day more and will do this for at least 2 weeks and to see what results from this and will keep upping my calories every two weeks til I find my maintenance level. I find what helps me not be hungry is eat several low calorie things instead of one big calories thing and for some reason it satisfies me more than if I ate something that was high in calories. I eat my biggest meal at noon also on most days and then the rest of the day I am eating things like yogurt, popcorn, fruit, granola bars and this works for me. So why don't you reset your goals and start fresh.
  • mikejacobs1958
    mikejacobs1958 Posts: 128
    As your friend, I will continue making comments to your postings, so hopefully from my side it should encourage you, along this bumpy MFP journey. The more comments and encouragement you get, the better.


    Your new running friend - Mike
  • cloud2011
    cloud2011 Posts: 898 Member
    Why not set a goal to log everything (not matter how much over you go) for one week? Take it a day at a time. Don't worry about losing for one week. Just try to get back on track with logging. Then a week from now, you can review what you've logged and make some decisions about how you want to go forward.

    I've lost over 30 lbs in 3 years but I keep gaining and losing 3-4 lbs...I do well if I log, but it's the logging that helps me stay in control.

    I need to break through my ups and downs, so I'm going to try it for this week, too. I've been logging again for a few days.
  • Hmrjmr1
    Hmrjmr1 Posts: 1,106 Member
    Check this picture if you need more motivation than that not sure I can help

    11612650_5759.jpg
  • lkcuts
    lkcuts Posts: 224
    I too was getting discouraged, When the diary said i should be a certain weight by 5 weeks and it wasn't happening I just thought "It wasn't working" Then my mind told me I have tried other ways and keep gaining back, that this is the best thing I have used and started tweeking my goals to shorter ones. ONe day at a time..Excercise I am reading prepares your body to rid of calories,keep bones and muscles strong That was my key. I uped my calories by setting myself as lightly active,started using light weights and 30 minutes of walking 2 days a week on the tread mill. I read on here to set your calorie goal then if you still aren't losing to keep adding calories by 100 and hold it there for a week, if you still aren't losing add more and so on till you find the magic formula that works for you. I have been very dilegent in logging EVERYTHING even on days I didn't do well in the eating area. I have finally found my spot for now and the weight is starting to go back down. YOu don't have to kill yourself in excersise unless you are training for a marathon or something LOL. All I can say is STAY WITH IT I almost gave up after going on 3 months and no real onward losses but once you find your nitch it works.
  • BerryH
    BerryH Posts: 4,698 Member
    Hello, I'm glad that you have reached out for help! Thanks for being honest about what is going on. My only advise is to jump back into it like crazy. You fell off the ban-wagon and now it's time to jump back on. No more half stepping. You are going to have to log everything weather you like it or not. Open up that food diary and make yourself accountable so everyone can see, this will motivate you even more to do the right thing. We are all in this together. 5 days will go by like that.. You will start seeing results, I hate to always sound like some know it all motivator all the time, but this is true, you get off track, you get back on, stick with it, and watch the results. Your body knows what it was used to before, you may see even greater success if you kick in full gear. I will keep up with you and try to motivate you as I can. Remember, Big baby steps, I say that because we all know there is no half way to doing this thing. We have to be honest with our logging and consistant with our working out. Please don't take this the wrong way and try not to feel as if I'm being too hard on you, YOU CAN DO IT! WE ARE ROOTING FOR YOU.
    Thanks! I'm starting with logging accurately and fully and I hope the rest will fall into place!
  • BerryH
    BerryH Posts: 4,698 Member
    join a challenge group for motivation and accountability!
    Good idea! In fact I have one myself and should aim towards that:
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/616765-berry-s-bare-belly-challenge-1st-july-outdoors-edition
  • BerryH
    BerryH Posts: 4,698 Member
    I think you just need to find something to work towards whether it be a trip that you've been wanting to take or the promise of a new wordrobe. If you can't come up with a goal, it'll just seem like there's an indefinite black hole. And take small steps. Start with some strength training and some light cardio, and go harder from there. You can do it! And having a calendar to mark off every day that you complete your goal might also help. I have one that's a 100 day goal chart and I cross off each day that I work out and eat healthy. It helps keep my motivation up.
    Great ideas, thanks! I just need to workout just what exercise when, and plan them on my calendar in advance.
  • BerryH
    BerryH Posts: 4,698 Member
    Same boat here. I found that marathon training doesn't help me lose weight. As much as I hate it, strength training is the way to go. I find that I lose weight if I keep running to an hour or less three times a week and do strength training on other days. My diet has become a nighmare again and I am not regularly logging. I am at the start of a four day weekend so I plan on focusing on my eating and logging everything. Hopefully, this will get me back on track.
    I had recently started back at strength training, but what I thought was a stiff neck is, I suspect, the resurfacing of an old injury when I fell training for the 2010 Marathon and tore the ligaments in my shoulder. I think it was kettlebell swings, so when I return to it I'll start with something less dynamic!
  • BerryH
    BerryH Posts: 4,698 Member
    Hi Berry,
    Sorry to hear you're struggling at the moment! I've been in a bit of a slump for a couple of weeks, pulled muscle, father in law in hospital & then a cold and tonsillitis all taking their toll so I have a bit of an insight as to how you might be feeling.
    Is your injury preventing you from getting back to the running, or even the fear of the injury? Could you try something different, to kick start your love affair with exercise again, maybe swimming could be worth a look, it's low impact, good calorie burn and a full body work out....
    Without seeing your diary it's hard to know what sort of choices you make on the days when exercise isn't an option, but to avoid that "shame" of going over your cals are there any substitutions/better choices you can make to keep the hunger under control whilst remaining in your calorie goals?
    Mainly though I just wanted to say well done, it must be hard at the moment, but you want to get back on the wagon and that's the most important thing!!
    Oh and as for your 7+ hours to finish the marathon, you seem to be neglecting a rather important point - you FINISHED the London marathon, that's a definite success!!!!!!!
    Thanks! It's definitely more the fear than the injury itself, but I do start getting foot pains after an hour of running, so I'll maybe stick to shorter bursts and throw in some hills and intervals. I'm enjoying doing exercise DVDs at the mo, but I do need to get out of the house sometimes!
  • BerryH
    BerryH Posts: 4,698 Member
    Sorry to hear you are struggling too. I know how u feel I have been the same since doing London & summoning up motivation is hard!! Think we just have to stick with it & hope it passes!! Like the comment on here about 3 runs a week of less than an hour & strength training. I may try that & hope it kick starts the running & weightloss!!! Sorry I can't be of more help to u on this occasion but will continue to support!!! Hopefully the rain will sod off, summer will return & we will both feel better about it!!! :flowerforyou: x
    I'll do the running three time a week with you, however short or slow and indoors or out, if you're up for it!
  • BerryH
    BerryH Posts: 4,698 Member
    How is your swimming with your injury? if your running is reduced and you can get hold of a bike how about signing up for another triathlon?
    I love swimming and used to race as a youth. I go once a week and always say to myself "I loved that, why don't I do it more often?" :laugh: I'm just going to shake this possible shoulder injury first, but I can always do the floats and water running thing (which is the most awesome leg and aerobic exercise ever) for now.
  • Maggie821
    Maggie821 Posts: 55 Member
    Many great suggestions already given by fellow MFP's; skimmed them quickly so I may have missed this suggestion. Do you have a fitness buddy/running partner that isn't virtual (love my virtual friends- don't get me wrong), but it's also nice to have someone running next to you to give you that needed push. I have a HM this weekend, and I'm not ready mentally or physically. I'm going to do it anyways...why not???

    This is just a temporary bump in the road for you - you still have your goals in mind and you WILL get back on track! Be kind to yourself, trust your instincts, and get back out there running! That feel good feeling will come back to you!
  • BerryH
    BerryH Posts: 4,698 Member
    I exercise very moderately by only walking 25 minutes 4 days a week. This has been a change of eating habits for me not a diet. So maybe you need to look at it that way as a change of eating habits and work up to what your maintenance level would be. I only started out at 1000 calories a day because before I joined mfp I wasn't eating much anyways so I started low, I have now lost all the weight I need and now I am increasing my calories because I want to eat more. I first increased my calories 2 weeks ago by 100 more a day and I still lost so now today I have increased it another 100 a day more and will do this for at least 2 weeks and to see what results from this and will keep upping my calories every two weeks til I find my maintenance level. I find what helps me not be hungry is eat several low calorie things instead of one big calories thing and for some reason it satisfies me more than if I ate something that was high in calories. I eat my biggest meal at noon also on most days and then the rest of the day I am eating things like yogurt, popcorn, fruit, granola bars and this works for me. So why don't you reset your goals and start fresh.
    Thanks for this. I do realise its the eating and not the exercise that makes the biggest difference. I'll get on the case!
  • BerryH
    BerryH Posts: 4,698 Member
    As your friend, I will continue making comments to your postings, so hopefully from my side it should encourage you, along this bumpy MFP journey. The more comments and encouragement you get, the better.


    Your new running friend - Mike
    Thanks Mike, what I'll do for my end of the bargain is close off my diary every night. Expect horrors before I get back on the wagon!
  • BerryH
    BerryH Posts: 4,698 Member
    Why not set a goal to log everything (not matter how much over you go) for one week? Take it a day at a time. Don't worry about losing for one week. Just try to get back on track with logging. Then a week from now, you can review what you've logged and make some decisions about how you want to go forward.

    I've lost over 30 lbs in 3 years but I keep gaining and losing 3-4 lbs...I do well if I log, but it's the logging that helps me stay in control.

    I need to break through my ups and downs, so I'm going to try it for this week, too. I've been logging again for a few days.
    This is exactly me, it's the logging that's the key! Starting today I'll lig everything and close, thanks :flowerforyou:
  • sabermax
    sabermax Posts: 64 Member
    I can relate. I have alot of weight to lose and I just keep playing with the same 5 pounds. I just joined a gym and that is what I needed to get motivated. I think that you should "shell" out the money for the race if money is not a issuse right now. So what if you dont "complete" the day, Do what you can. I know that if you go into it with that attitude you well feel better and satisfied at the end of the day. It may just what you need to jump-start you again. I think small step small progress is the best . I have lost over 100 pouns already on mt own but it took me 3 years. I still have 95 to go. When I when to the gym the first time a couple of days ago I thought wow I will go on the stair stepper for 30 minutes. Boy, That did not happen. I could only make it 5, was dying and had a hard time walking for a few minutes. But I went back the next day. Small goals, small steps. And you know, after the stair stepper for 5 minutes, I was sore for 3 days. So its all progress. I know that one day soon, I will be able to go for 30 minutes. So I wish you well, and if you want to you can add me as a friend!!!!!! I be thinking of you!!!!
  • lmp176
    lmp176 Posts: 14
    I am finally getting on track myself and what has worked for me is shaking up my diet every few weeks. I eat the same thing every day Monday - Thursday and then the weekends are my "treat" days where I can have something different. Go back to the grocery store on Sunday and get ready to start over with a new week long meal. That worked for several weeks and when I stalled out about 2 weeks ago on my weight loss, I became very frustrated and decided to do a Low Carb diet for 2 weeks just to try to trick my body. Believe me I am still feeling hungry a lot since I am staying in my MFP Calorie limit where others on Atkins eat until they are full but its been enough to startle my body into weight loss again.

    On the exercise front, I am sorry about your marathon injury. I am training to run my 2nd 10K ever this September. I ran my first a month ago as part of the Pittsburgh Marathon. I survived but I was very disappointed in my time. I think biking or any other cross training like using an elliptical machine would be easier on your knees and you still get the "running" feel.

    You'll get back on the wagon, the hardest part is reaching out for help which you have. Keep up the good work and know that we are cheering you on all the way across the pond :o)
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