How to find your will power

I have been really struggling on staying on a healthy path this last year. I have done this a few times lost 60lbs... gained it back lost 35 lbs gained it back and then some... and this time around I just can't seem to find that will power i used to have. I am trying again today to try and stay on that wagon. Today I plan on when I get home from work I want to get some kind of workout done for an hour. My problem is being SO tired when I get off work and having to go home and cook supper for the kids and all the chores that need to be done around the house. I am finding myself going to bed earlier each week. Once supper is done, dishes are done kids are tended to and other stuff I want done I go to bed normally it's at the same time as my kids... around 9pm... and sometimes I wish they would go to bed earlier so I can. This is such a vicious cycle to break. i have never weighed this much EVER my clothes are getting tighter and tighter... I know what I have to do but yet on my way home my list of excuses as to why I just don't have the time or the energy start going thru my head and i don't end up doing anything. but lately I have been so crabby because of the lack of excercise and bad eating. I know what I need to do... I need to find a way to stop the voices in my head when I am tired. How do you make them stop talking????:mad:
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Replies

  • jennb78
    jennb78 Posts: 13
    I would like to hear others responses to this as well. It is the same for me and i find that when I do eat bad and dont work out I feel worse then get mad at myself. I have read people say you just have to say enough is enough and make time......easier said than done! So then I go on MFP to get motivation and I read about all these people losing weight and exercising and staying under calories then wonder why I can't then i get all upset about it again.
  • tishajo
    tishajo Posts: 142 Member
    Bump!
  • terrabit
    terrabit Posts: 33 Member
    I remind myself that I will never regret making a wise food choice or working out afterwards, but I will always regret not doing those things.
  • sarahcuddle
    sarahcuddle Posts: 349 Member
    Decide to change. Only you can do this. Eat healthy stuff, plenty of lean protein, complex carbs and fruits and veggies. Drink plenty of water. Take it one day at a time. If one day you eat bad and do no exercise, resolve that tomorrow you will do better. Don't give up. You can do this. Do a little exercise each day. Today I tried to keep up with my little girl so when she ran on ahead on the way to school, I did too. I am really bad at running so she can outdo me anyday but at least I made an effort. Small steps which will lead to bigger changes.

    All the Best

    Sarah
  • Immaskinnycow
    Immaskinnycow Posts: 29 Member
    Start fresh. Forget about the past. What has happened can not be changed. We can just move forward with the lessons we've learned, and go from there. You know what it take to shed the pounds. In my opinion, it comes down to what you are willing to do to shed the pounds. You don't need to do sceduled workouts everyday. Start simple. Park father away from the entrance to the grocery store, take the stairs instead of an elevator. As long as you move, you're doing great. Walk to the mailbox several times. Any movement is better than no movement. When you're in the grocery store, walk as fast as possible to gather your groceries. You can do it.:flowerforyou:
  • bexterbee
    bexterbee Posts: 7
    I feel like this too!! I am definitely at my heaviest and find it very hard - just no willpower. I just try to keep my goals in mind and tell myself if I want to meet my target, I MUST keep going. Best of luck to you!
  • tracrey
    tracrey Posts: 4 Member
    I agree with what Sarah said.. you just have to commit to change your life. We have all known for a long time we wanted to lose weight, but for one reason or another didn't do anything about it, right? Until you make up your mind it's time. That is what happens to me. Even when I was getting married I didn't lose any weight.. I wanted to, but didn't commit to it. Then in April of this year I woke up one day and told myself I wanted to change and I've been soda/juice/fast food free since that day and signed up for MFP. Good luck to you and everyone.
  • jagwab
    jagwab Posts: 93
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lsSC2vx7zFQ&feature=plcp

    Watch this. It's very motivational. I watch this at least once a week.
  • thuy5
    thuy5 Posts: 22
    I used to find it hardest to just start anything - like getting ready to exercise and often used to find excuses for why not, but if you can overcome that hurdle, just blindly start putting on your gear and going out that door for a brisk walk, or meeting up with someone that will hold you to some exercise, then once your doing it, you will feel heaps better.

    I guess its kinda like inertia, most of the energy is in getting started and once your away you have momentum.

    Don't give up!
  • bnelly55
    bnelly55 Posts: 88 Member
    You have to decide that you and your health are worth it. It's ok to be 'selfish' and work on you! You cannot be fully there for your family if you end up developing health problems because of your weight. I started my weight loss/health journey 8 months ago and let me tell you, it was crazy how guilty I felt for taking time out for me. However, I joined a gym and relied on my fiancé more and more. This is YOUR time, do it for you. Also, exercising gives you energy and helps battle depression. :)
  • slkehl
    slkehl Posts: 3,801 Member
    That's tough. I'd focus more on eating right than working out. Exercise is great, but when you're that busy it might be easier just to cut back on food. I'd say logging everything and making good choices at the grocery store is the best way to start.


    As for exercise, see if there's little ways to get it in. Like taking the stairs, going for a short walk during one of your breaks...
    You could also choose to do less but more intense exercises weekend warrior style. Exercise DVDs ftw for easy at home exercise.
  • cordianet
    cordianet Posts: 534 Member
    That's tough. I'd focus more on eating right than working out. Exercise is great, but when you're that busy it might be easier just to cut back on food. I'd say logging everything and making good choices at the grocery store is the best way to start.


    As for exercise, see if there's little ways to get it in. Like taking the stairs, going for a short walk during one of your breaks...
    You could also choose to do less but more intense exercises weekend warrior style. Exercise DVDs ftw for easy at home exercise.

    I totally agree. Think of exercise as a ticket to health, and your diet as a ticket to weight loss. If you're too tired to exercise right now, follow your dire, start getting some of the weight off, and as you lose, you'll start to fin that you have more energy. When that happens, SLOWLY start adding exercise to your daily routine.
  • itsjustdawn
    itsjustdawn Posts: 1,073 Member
    I have been really struggling on staying on a healthy path this last year. I have done this a few times lost 60lbs... gained it back lost 35 lbs gained it back and then some... and this time around I just can't seem to find that will power i used to have. I am trying again today to try and stay on that wagon. Today I plan on when I get home from work I want to get some kind of workout done for an hour. My problem is being SO tired when I get off work and having to go home and cook supper for the kids and all the chores that need to be done around the house. I am finding myself going to bed earlier each week. Once supper is done, dishes are done kids are tended to and other stuff I want done I go to bed normally it's at the same time as my kids... around 9pm... and sometimes I wish they would go to bed earlier so I can. This is such a vicious cycle to break. i have never weighed this much EVER my clothes are getting tighter and tighter... I know what I have to do but yet on my way home my list of excuses as to why I just don't have the time or the energy start going thru my head and i don't end up doing anything. but lately I have been so crabby because of the lack of excercise and bad eating. I know what I need to do... I need to find a way to stop the voices in my head when I am tired. How do you make them stop talking????:mad:

    I don't have kids, but the rest of what you posted here is me. It is a constant struggle. I am ALWAYS tired (I don't have kids or too much of an active lifestyle to blame, so I don't know why this is). I am glad you posted your struggle though. I'd like to read what everyone has to say. I hope this is your time to shine :-)
  • akmacs5
    akmacs5 Posts: 4 Member
    I struggled with this myself and always seemed to find an excuse to not do it or even stick with it for an extended period of time. My goal is to lose 100lbs and I had to realize the "I" was worth it & no one could make the change for me. This was ALL ME. That's a tough one to swollow when your a mother, work full time & stay up with chores etc. What got me locked into finally doing something about it was when my doctor said I was heading straight for some really bad health issues if I didn't make changes now. Diabetes, Heart disease were top on the list & I wanted to be around to see my kids grow up & have their kids etc. I realized that all this time that I was helping everyone else, I wasn't helping myself therefore not doing anyone any good. I was miserable. My doctor said, just get moving. Start with 5 min & if you get yourself there, you'll most likely stay for 10 and it was so true! I didn't like it at first & forced myself to get up before the kids did to have some "ME TIME". I could listen to the music I like and have no one distract me. I figured out quick, that i liked that time and now actually miss it when I don't exercise so YOU TOO CAN DO THIS but you have to do it for yourself because you are worth it!
  • wrecktechno
    wrecktechno Posts: 145 Member
    Maybe you need a work out/lifestyle change buddy. Someone who asks you why you are eating cake, why you had two servings instead of one (you'll need to show them your food diary), why you didn't come running when they were waiting for you at 6am? Someone to make you accountable. I tried hard to get my mum and sister along to the gym with me but they were full of excuses and so I used their not wanting to come as an excuse not to go. But then one day I went, nope! No more excuses, you will go alone, screw them. And now I do. I think of all those weeks I wasted not going because of them.

    Instead of getting home and doing all that stuff THEN trying to fit in exercise, take your workout gear with you to work and go straight after. Therefore no excuses, you've lugged your gear that far so you may as well use it and you can't think up excuses for why you can't. and also DONT THINK ABOUT IT. Don't think, just put your gear on and go. If you allow yourself to think about why you dont want to do it, you let the voices in. Shut those suckers out.

    Maybe you need to set yourself smaller weight loss goals. Lose 2 kgs in 2 weeks, 5 kgs by the start of August. I want to fit into that black spotty dress by August 8th. I want to be able to do 5 proper pushups on my toes by the 7th of July. Keep setting really small goals. Write them down and tick them off.

    Can't your kids do some chores and help cook dinner? Can't they wash the dishes? I was getting myself off to school when I was 10 (getting myself out of bed, making my own lunch, getting my clothes ready, going out to catch the bus) but I don't know how old your kids are..

    If you are that tired, maybe you should get to the doctor for a blood test. Maybe you have under-active thyroid, diabetes, iron deficiency or something. I wouldn't rule out a health issue for your tiredness.

    Michelle Bridges (Biggest Loser personal trainer here in Oz) says (as does akmacs5 above), abide by the 10 minute rule. Go to the gym or start walking for 10 minutes and really put your back into it. 10 MINUTES. It's what, 0.7% of your day? If after 10 minutes you want to go home, go home but 99/100 times you'll stay and you'll be thankful you did.
  • Sarah0866
    Sarah0866 Posts: 291 Member
    I used to work full time while going to school full time, and holding down a part-time weekend position, which left me feeling drained. I started working out much earlier, getting up at 4:45 am to get my workout out of the way so that I wouldn't have the excuse that I was too tired later in the day, or wind up skipping it. It really helped and I was able to drop about 40 lbs. Getting in a good workout in the morning also encouraged me to eat better throughout the day as I didn't want to feel as though I had wasted the workout.

    U can totally do this..don't let a plateau psych you out :)
  • feydruss
    feydruss Posts: 349 Member
    I have a hard time with this too. Sheer fatigue coupled with laziness makes it hard to stay on track. Recently I highlighted a bunch of new classes at the gym to try, to see if something new might rev me up again. Also bought new workout clothes, which I'm looking forward to wearing.

    Right now I'm trying to make the best of each day, and make more good choices than bad ones. But I still can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. It's a marathon, not a sprint!
  • Maurice1966
    Maurice1966 Posts: 419 Member
    How old ae you children? Can they be left alone in the morning? I agree life can get hectic and it's easy to find excuses no to workout at the end of a hard, long day. That's why I get my work outs done in the morning. It actually invigorates you for the rest of the day also. It may be difficult to do this if your kiods a little i realise. Just a suggestion
  • TerraLea
    TerraLea Posts: 87 Member
    I have been really struggling on staying on a healthy path this last year. I have done this a few times lost 60lbs... gained it back lost 35 lbs gained it back and then some... and this time around I just can't seem to find that will power i used to have. I am trying again today to try and stay on that wagon. Today I plan on when I get home from work I want to get some kind of workout done for an hour. My problem is being SO tired when I get off work and having to go home and cook supper for the kids and all the chores that need to be done around the house. I am finding myself going to bed earlier each week. Once supper is done, dishes are done kids are tended to and other stuff I want done I go to bed normally it's at the same time as my kids... around 9pm... and sometimes I wish they would go to bed earlier so I can. This is such a vicious cycle to break. i have never weighed this much EVER my clothes are getting tighter and tighter... I know what I have to do but yet on my way home my list of excuses as to why I just don't have the time or the energy start going thru my head and i don't end up doing anything. but lately I have been so crabby because of the lack of excercise and bad eating. I know what I need to do... I need to find a way to stop the voices in my head when I am tired. How do you make them stop talking????:mad:

    As a mom of 3(4 if you count my hubby, hehe), I understand completely!!!! I found out that my Vitamin D was super low (I'm on a weekly prescription of Vit D to maintain it), and my cholesterol was slightly elevated. Once I got those level led out my energy was better. Can you wake up a little earlier in the morning & do a 20 minute workout video or walk? Start with short workouts. If you have a video game system (Wii, Xbox, etc.) Compete with your children - it is a blast. We do games where only 2 can play at a time which means that I workout 3 times - my children LOVE it!! I hope this helps. Feel free to add me & if I can help in any way, I will.
  • themommie
    themommie Posts: 5,033 Member
    breaking it down into smaller baby steps has helped me. When i started and looked at losing 100+ lbs it seemed impossible so I just concentrated on 10 lbs at a time, no time limit just looking at 10 lbs at a time. also everyday I would make myself do 10 mins of exercise even if just a walk but usually once i started I would do way more then 10mins often doing 45-90 mins of exercise. Also take it one day at a time, if you do mess up get right back ontrack not tomorrow, not monday but right now immediately. I hope this helps
  • Pebble321
    Pebble321 Posts: 6,423 Member
    It is hard to keep the momentum going - I've definitely had times where I just lose the plot and eat way too much chocolate and then feel bad for doing it.

    I don't have a great solution - but my best advice is just to keep doing the best you can every day.

    - treat each meal and snack as a new opportunity to make a healthy choice. Maybe you had a crappy morning, well, make lunch a healthy one. You can't change what has already gone, but you can change what you do next.
    - have a look at your routine and see if there is a different way to fit some reguar exercise into your day. I find that I need to exercise in the morning or it will never happen. Can you get up 30 mins earlier and get your workout in then? It might mean less sleep in the am, but you can go to bed earlier and sleep better knowing you have done what you wanted to do. Or can you fit any exercise into your children's routines - can you run along side while they ride to the park or run laps while they are at soccer training? Or, if they are little can you dance around like a mad mummy with them for 15 mins every evening before dinner?
    - the "baby steps" concept is a great one when you are feeling jaded. Pick ONE thing to achieve this week (eat a healthy brekky every day maybe, or walk for 15 mins every morning) and do that. Next week pick another healthy habit and work on that. These habits do add up, but better still they help you reconnect with the reasons why you are doing this and let you feel a sense of achievement.

    Hang in there, you can do it!
  • d3mon4ngel
    d3mon4ngel Posts: 242 Member
    I found that if I leave the workout til after work, it's more than likely not going to get done. If I want to get anything done, I have to do it before I go out, so I've started getting up an hour or two earlier on my workout days. I don't have kids to worry about though so don't know if this would be feasible for you.
  • A couple of things that have made a massive difference with my energy levels lately:

    1. Vitamin B - It's amazing stuff, one tablet every morning has made a noticable difference to my day (and incidentally helps your hangover after a big night)!

    2. Having a protein shake before the gym - I used to get home from the gym absolutely wrecked - hungry and grumpy. Now I have a soy-protein shake (120 cals) at about 4pm and then head to the gym straight after work (it's right next to my building so I have to walk past it to get home, which has helped me stick to actually going!) and I seem to have more energy during my work out and after.

    I dont have kids so I cant imagine how much more difficult finding the time to exercise is for you! But I think at the end of the day if you cant work out then you're going to have to make the effort to eat right, and dont forget incidental exercise! Clench those cheeks while your doing the dishes! Do squats and lunges while you vaacum!

    Good luck! :)

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  • Pablosammy
    Pablosammy Posts: 52 Member
    I find that getting fitter gives me an amazing feel good factor. The eating well then happens naturally. Instead of focussing on your weight loss, why not set yourself a fitness challenge? Like running a half marathon or something?
  • stuffinmuffin
    stuffinmuffin Posts: 985 Member
    When I started out on this, I felt motivated by the scale moving down and my clothes getting lose. You don't have to change what you eat, you can opt to eat less of it. You don't have to hit the exercise hard, a calorie deficit alone will make you lose weight.
    I was determined to lose weight I was so fed up with how I looked and felt about myself, I guess I reached a real pivot point. I'd never dieted properly before and I think that MFP really worked for me because it was also a learning game. I started to pay attention to the labelling on foodstuffs in supermarkets, learn the portions of carbohydrates that I was meant to be having - learnt about some horrors in food I would eat without thinking and really found out the value of fruit and veg being low calorie 'fillers/snacks'. I consumed my energy into this rather into moping that I was dieting. Not saying it was easy because it isn't, at times I felt damn miserable and hungry and that's where my MFP friends really came into play. There's a whole heap of people here and if you like them enough not to let them down then you find you wont be letting yourself down either.

    You must also give yourself a treat every now and then. I used to have a weekly 'cheat meal and drinks' with friends, but for this I would save some exercise calories through the week so I wouldn't exceed my Weekly Net Goal. I don't think I could have completed this experience without those nights - I would have ended up a social leper!

    Also believe you can do this! There is a sense of achievement in this journey you just have to be patient, but it will equip you with a way of eating you can use for the rest of your life that will not feel like deprivation.

    I'm about 14 months in and can say this is one of the best things I have done for myself.

    Have faith in yourself. :flowerforyou:
  • sho3girl
    sho3girl Posts: 10,799 Member
    Being on here's helping, for instance yesterday I had preview tickets for Rock of Ages. Normally I would have got home after 9pm and watched tv but in my attempt to stay on track I made myself do 30 minutes of Zumba ... yes i was hard I was tired but I felt better for doing it.
  • donnab83
    donnab83 Posts: 105 Member
    .I don't Have kids, but I work shifts, so I kinda understand the tiredness thing. My motivation is to be a better me. Sounds corny I know, but have little victorys! Every lb u lose your on the way...... You didn't put it on in a short amount of time,, it won't come off in a short amount of time, it's gota be a lifestyle change. I used to read these sorts of coments & think ok easier said than done, but unfortunately they are true. & as you have kids, what better way to set them up than to show them how to be healthy, so they won't have the struggles your going through! The liitle victories can be saying no to the cookie, being amazed that you can now do things that you couldn't before, buying a smaller size, what ever. Make it personal. My dr told me I have to lose 5 stone. To be a healthy BMI. I thought he was mad. I can't do that! I'm 1/2 way there! Now I believe in myself & realise that you have to do it for you. ( you mentined you have done it before, you can do it again!) Watch things like the biggest looser, obese a year to save my life. They certainly motivated me. If they can do it so can you! Good luck! X
  • ChantalD75
    ChantalD75 Posts: 680 Member
    thanks guys!! I am trying to watch what I eat and not go for 2nds anymore. I have 3 kids.. 15, 12 and 10. My goal would be to get up earlier in the morning to get the workout out of the way. But right now I am getting up at the last possible second and having to rush in the morning. My kids are impossible to wake up I am always having to go back and poke them to get up. they do make their own lunches when needed and they do help out with dishes. I think what I need to do is MAKE myself get up ealier and just do it. And then if I still have energy at the end of the day then do a bonus walk or work out. Take the dust of the WII Fit.

    I appreciate all your comments!! :flowerforyou:

    I need to make myself a higher priority before it's too late!
  • flechero
    flechero Posts: 260 Member
    If you start off slow and make the transition less shocking, you will need far less "will power." Maybe ease into your new calorie goal over a 1-2 week period vs. cutting intake in half, overnight.
  • lisabrezina1980
    lisabrezina1980 Posts: 60 Member
    I was having a hard time too...and then yesterday something just sort of woke me up. I smoked my last cig (smoked for 17 years over half my life) had my last drink of caffine, and ate my last big meal (ok not forever on the last two), but anyway, this might sound really cheesy, but just try it;go to a mirror and take a good look at yourself. I don't know you or what you look like but I am assuming your not a monster and that you have some nice features..anyway. While looking at yourself, ask yourself what you honestly want to look like, notice how pretty you are and why would you not live up to your full potential in looks? Again unless you are a beast I am sure you are a lovely person, so you can make a choice and settle with the image you see and if you do that accept yourself and be as beautiful as you already are and love yourself. It's a choice, I choose to be fit and stop putting junk into my body, what is the point? I can be beatiful, it's just that I need a little improvement and while I am working on myself I am going to learn and gain more confidence, so basically if I can do it you can too. Just ask yourself, why wouldn't you want to look and feel as good as possible? Seems silly not to...