Mixed messages, and so very confused.
Way_2_a_Healthy_Mel
Posts: 175 Member
I am so very confused. I get so many mixed messages on this site. I get told that losing slower is healthier, yet I see people losing massive amounts, very quickly, and they are doing very well, without any ill effects. I get told that eating under BMR is unhealthy, yet I see people doing it every single day, and they are doing fantastic. I have also been told that fad diets are unhealthy, but yet I see people on here on all kinds of fad diets, and they are doing very well. Then, I see "eat your exercise calories" and "don't eat your exercise calories" and some people count every single thing, and others don't. I still can't figure out which of any of these is the best for me. I don't want to do anything that will hurt me in the long run. This is very important to me, but I don't know what is right for me. I want success, and I see everyone gaining success in different ways. I wish I knew which was my way...
Some people have had great results with eating very little (1200 calories or less), and lost hundreds of pounds without ever hitting a plateau, and the same people never eat back their exercise calories, yet will burn hundreds, if not thousands, of calories a day, and have been doing so for years and months, without any ill effects. I also have seen people who have lost quick, and eaten very little, and kept it off for a very long time. I want sustainable results, since this is my life, but when I see these huge losses, in people a lot smaller than I am, it makes me question if I am doing things correctly.
Some people have had great results with eating very little (1200 calories or less), and lost hundreds of pounds without ever hitting a plateau, and the same people never eat back their exercise calories, yet will burn hundreds, if not thousands, of calories a day, and have been doing so for years and months, without any ill effects. I also have seen people who have lost quick, and eaten very little, and kept it off for a very long time. I want sustainable results, since this is my life, but when I see these huge losses, in people a lot smaller than I am, it makes me question if I am doing things correctly.
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Replies
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I don't know what the right way is but I have been losing very slowly. I have been actively trying for almost a year and am at 31 lbs lost. I have donE quick weight loss before and seem to gain it back easier when I go that route.0
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I was one of those who lost quickly and in a faddy sort of way. Now i'm worse off that what I started. If you want to be good later down the line then slower is better.
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Obviously everyone's body is different. Probably the worst thing you can do is eat super low calories-below 1200 a day for more than a few days at a time. Whatever you are doing must be working since you've lost 34 lbs already.0
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glad you put this message, because I feel the same way here!!0
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I believe that slower weight loss has a better potential for being permanent weight loss.I was one of those who lost quickly and in a faddy sort of way. Now i'm worse off that what I started. If you want to be good later down the line then slower is better.0 -
Some of it is just going to be trial and error for you.
Large Deficits: Some people can get away with eating in a larger deficit because they're particularly obese. It's not something they should do for extended periods of time, though, usually. And I'd probably suggest also using a multi-vitamin. If someone has 100+ lbs to lose, they can get away with eating at 1k+ deficit more easily than if someone has 10lbs to lose. The closer you are to your goal, the slower weight loss will be and smaller your deficit should be.
Fad Diets: It's very personal. Odds are you'll probably be more successful in the long run if you kind find a way of eating that you can sustain and that will sustain you. A lot of people make this much harder than it has to be. Though sometimes people have moral/ethical reasons for choosing a particular diet over another, but again that's personal. If you're frustrated, try to keep it simple.
Long Term Health: If you are this concerned and stressed about it, you may benefit from seeing a nutritionist and consulting your doctor. Generally, the more extreme the diet seems the higher the odds of there being long term health risks. Again, do not rely on internet forums to ease your mind on health concerns.0 -
I am so very confused. I get so many mixed messages on this site. I get told that losing slower is healthier, yet I see people losing massive amounts, very quickly, and they are doing very well, without any ill effects. I get told that eating under BMR is unhealthy, yet I see people doing it every single day, and they are doing fantastic. I have also been told that fad diets are unhealthy, but yet I see people on here on all kinds of fad diets, and they are doing very well. Then, I see "eat your exercise calories" and "don't eat your exercise calories" and some people count every single thing, and others don't. I still can't figure out which of any of these is the best for me. I don't want to do anything that will hurt me in the long run. This is very important to me, but I don't know what is right for me. I want success, and I see everyone gaining success in different ways. I wish I knew which was my way...
Looks like you've lost 34 pounds.... I'd say continue doing what you're doing! Great Job!0 -
Find what you are comfortable with and helps you lose and feel healthy and strong. Then keep doing it and shut out the noise from everywhere else. Lots of people have found formulas that work for them and then they want to dictate it to you as if their way answers all of YOUR questions.
It looks like you're doing great with your weight loss - TRUST that!
XOXO0 -
I have felt the same as you, but I look at it this way...different methods work for different people. I have lost an enormous amount of weight in the past and have gained most of it back. I am just realizing that I need to make lifestyle changes and learn what really works for me. MFP, has been a learning tool and once I started to not worry about this calorie here and this pound there, I wasn't so stressed about my eating habits. I can't tell you the countless times that I wanted to give in, because I just could not seem to wrap my head around what would work and what doesn't work. I am learning each day. For instance, I had not ever heard of MACROnutrients, until this board. I have wasted money on trying quick fixes that only gave me temporary results because once I reached my goal, I went back to my old habits. Hang in there. I am sure that you will receive some helpful feedback. I am interested in what others have to add to this topic as well.0
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Some of it is just going to be trial and error for you.
Large Deficits: Some people can get away with eating in a larger deficit because they're particularly obese. It's not something they should do for extended periods of time, though, usually. And I'd probably suggest also using a multi-vitamin. If someone has 100+ lbs to lose, they can get away with eating at 1k+ deficit more easily than if someone has 10lbs to lose. The closer you are to your goal, the slower weight loss will be and smaller your deficit should be.
Fad Diets: It's very personal. Odds are you'll probably be more successful in the long run if you kind find a way of eating that you can sustain and that will sustain you. A lot of people make this much harder than it has to be. Though sometimes people have moral/ethical reasons for choosing a particular diet over another, but again that's personal. If you're frustrated, try to keep it simple.
Long Term Health: If you are this concerned and stressed about it, you may benefit from seeing a nutritionist and consulting your doctor. Generally, the more extreme the diet seems the higher the odds of there being long term health risks. Again, do not rely on internet forums to ease your mind on health concerns.
I am seeing people with less than 100 lbs to lose eating at very large deficits, and they never eat back any exercise calories...and they are doing fantastic.
About the nutritionist, I can't afford one, and my doctor says I am doing a great job, and he has seen great results in my labs since I began losing weight and eating differently.0 -
You have to just figure out what works for you and apply it.0
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I am seeing people with less than 100 lbs to lose eating at very large deficits, and they never eat back any exercise calories...and they are doing fantastic.
About the nutritionist, I can't afford one, and my doctor says I am doing a great job, and he has seen great results in my labs since I began losing weight and eating differently.
Even if you see these people in person, and it seems like they're doing great, talk to them in 2 or 3 years and see how it's going.
Ultimately they don't matter, though. If your doctor thinks you're doing great, I don't see what the problem is. Don't go looking for problems where none exist It's not productive to compare your weight loss to anyone else's as a form of validation or justification of what you're doing.
You're successful. Period. Don't question it until you stop being successful.0 -
You have to just figure out what works for you and apply it.
But, I don't know what works best for me...that's why I posted this...I said I was confused, and wish I knew what was best for me. I want to try and lose faster, but it scares me because it hurts some people...yet others have no problems with it...I wish I knew which type of person I was.0 -
It can be very confusing, I understand. Though, for me, I study, research and read a lot on health, fitness, training and weight loss so I have the best knowledge base I can have.
~EvenKeel is absolutely right. It is personal and something you will have to hone through trial and error.
~Everyone is going to be doing something different. That is human nature. There are many ways to be successful on here and we all have to find the way it works for us.
~Keep in mind, not everyone is as successful as you view them to be. 99% of my personal MFP friends, I do not know personally, thus only see their "success" through the eyes of this website. What a warped view! We usually see either all their success and none of their failures, OR all of their failures and none of their success. DON"T COMPARE YOUR SUCCESS TO SOMEONE ELSE'S! I know it's hard, but its key.
~Study, google, whatever it takes to learn more about this stuff. Learn the terms and abriviations that are commonly used and how the metabolism works. its 100% worth your time to do. It will make for LASTING success :happy:
BEST OF LUCK!0 -
Fad Diets: ... Odds are you'll probably be more successful in the long run if you kind find a way of eating that you can sustain and that will sustain you.
This is what I have been doing and it is really working for me and I don't really feel like I am suffering. I am also trying to isolate the exact reasons I have failed before and finding ways to prevent them. For instance, I would skip breakfast and eat a light lunch to try to save my calories, but I would always be so hungry that I would WAY overeat at or even before dinner. Now I make sure to spread out my calories during the day. It is kind of an organized approach to weight loss - but every time I identify a past food issue and find a way to avoid or get around it this whole thing gets a whole lot easier.
I know there is tons of advice out there and you should listen to it- but then take what you want- follow your instincts- do what is right for you.0 -
I am seeing people with less than 100 lbs to lose eating at very large deficits, and they never eat back any exercise calories...and they are doing fantastic.
About the nutritionist, I can't afford one, and my doctor says I am doing a great job, and he has seen great results in my labs since I began losing weight and eating differently.
Even if you see these people in person, and it seems like they're doing great, talk to them in 2 or 3 years and see how it's going.
Ultimately they don't matter, though. If your doctor thinks you're doing great, I don't see what the problem is. Don't go looking for problems where none exist It's not productive to compare your weight loss to anyone else's as a form of validation or justification of what you're doing.
You're successful. Period. Don't question it until you stop being successful.
The problem is I still have SO much more to lose, and want to get it off, and if I can get it off faster, and still do it healthy, than I want to do that...but I also don't want to hurt myself...I am just so tired of being fat, and I guess I am just jealous that some people can do it, and I can't.0 -
I have run across this myself here and it really does come to you and what works best for you. It is really is a trial and error type of thing. Go with a certain route for a month and if you dont like the results try it another way and see if that produces the results you want. I however am not a big fan of fad diets or pills simply because of one thing...once you stop, most of the time you will gain it back simply because you have stopped taking or only eating what you were on that fad diet, so unless you plan on being on it forever then its not a wise choice and most likely not a healthy choice either. I also would recommend to not ever go below eating in 1200 calories. Thats actual 1200 calories that you eat each day. And if you want a huge deficit then exercise 800 to 1000 a day if you want! and dont eat back those....but at least take in 1200. It really is a trial and error thing as much as I hate it also:) if that doesnt work, try upping your calorie intake some and see!:)0
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Ask yourself this... Is what you're currently doing working for you? Do you generally feel good in energy level, mood, satisfaction with the amount and types of food you're eating?
Then keep doing it.
If not, try something different.0 -
Put everything people say in a big sifter,then give it a good shake and pick out the things that work best for you0
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When I signed up MFP said to eat 1200 calories.
I started exercising, I would add it - then eat back my calories.
So far I've been losing steadily...even while reading that 1200 is crazy low and I should be eating way more. It might be. But it's working, and my doctor says it's ok. So I'm not going to fix what isn't broken! When it stops working, I'll re-evaluate and go from there!
It's totally confusing when you have so much info to process! Just stick with what works for you, and go from there! 0 -
Trial and errorYou have to just figure out what works for you and apply it.
But, I don't know what works best for me...that's why I posted this...I said I was confused, and wish I knew what was best for me. I want to try and lose faster, but it scares me because it hurts some people...yet others have no problems with it...I wish I knew which type of person I was.0 -
I don't know what the right way is but I have been losing very slowly. I have been actively trying for almost a year and am at 31 lbs lost. I have donE quick weight loss before and seem to gain it back easier when I go that route.
I'm right with you - a little over a year, and 31 lbs lost - It's all about the person, I guess - you try things out, and see what works for you. everyone is unique.0 -
It can be very confusing, I understand. Though, for me, I study, research and read a lot on health, fitness, training and weight loss so I have the best knowledge base I can have.
~EvenKeel is absolutely right. It is personal and something you will have to hone through trial and error.
~Study, google, whatever it takes to learn more about this stuff. Learn the terms and abriviations that are commonly used and how the metabolism works. its 100% worth your time to do. It will make for LASTING success :happy:
BEST OF LUCK!
Thanks..I have studied all this stuff, and it still confuses me, because there are still a ton of people who eat way below BMR and say they CAN'T eat at their BMR or they GAIN...they are adamant about it, saying they have tried it and it didn't work for them. It just makes me wonder if they can do it, can I? I don't know, and I just get so scared. I am tired of being fat. I just want to find the best and healthiest way. I kind of wonder if I can do it the way I see others doing it, but if I even try to eat below 1500 I am a nutcase (more than usual), so I don't see how I could eat 1200 or less a day...with my weight, I get told a lot that I could shoot for 2 lbs a week and be okay, and I was losing that or more in a week, eating a pretty big calorie amount in a day...but if I could lose even more, it would be even better.0 -
I have lost weight several times. I have done low fat, low carb, nutrition shakes, 1000 calories or less etc. I have gained it back every time. Just because these diets work, doesn't mean that the weight will stay off. You have to change your lifestyle in a way that is sustainable. If you lose weight in a slow and healthy way, I believe you will have a better chance and maintaining your weightloss because it's done in a way that is not so restrictive that you would give up on it and revert back to your old habits. Anyway, that's my two cents worth.
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You have to find what works for you. I'm not a good example because I have the lap band. I have to eat a lot of protein and my Dr recommended (and dietitian) a low glycemic diet. Due to my diabetes, I have to be very careful about my blood sugar going up so higher protein is the best for me. I can only eat about 1 cup of food at a time and 3 times a day. Sometimes my band is tight in the morning and I just have a protein shake. People who haven't had lap band do not understand this and even some lap band people don't have problems with eating things that I can tolerate totally and vice versa. I am under the care of my PCP and a Bariatric surgeon and his dietitian so I am closely monitored.
We are all different. We like to eat different things. Try to find a diet or way of eating that helps you to lose weight and feel happy. IF I didn't have a lap band, diabetes, food allergies, etc I would definitely eat more carbs (whole grains). Usually a diet that is full of fruits and veggies and whole grains and lean protein is the best bet. Limit processed foods (hard in this day and age) and fried foods and sugar.
Have you thought of seeing a registered Dietitian to help you some? Of course, they all have their own way of seeing things too lol.0 -
Even if you see these people in person, and it seems like they're doing great, talk to them in 2 or 3 years and see how it's going.
Ultimately they don't matter, though. If your doctor thinks you're doing great, I don't see what the problem is. Don't go looking for problems where none exist It's not productive to compare your weight loss to anyone else's as a form of validation or justification of what you're doing.
You're successful. Period. Don't question it until you stop being successful.
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Thank you. This is very helpful to me. I realize that I didn't put on all this excess weight overnight; however I am doing something for my overall health and learning in the process.0 -
First, congrats on 34lbs, thats awesome! My wife (hootsmamma) and I are doing it slow. It took some time, but we finally found a good eating pattern that allows us to enjoy and still lose. I took my goal weight calories and reduced it by 500 and thats my daily goal. I've been eating that way for a year now and it is working for me. We slowly purged a lot of processed foods fromour pantry and eat more whole, fresh foods. We also went gluten free and that wa huge for us. Everyone is different,s o as everyone has said experimwent. Try a particular way of eating or cut something out for 30 days and see how it affects you, thenm decide what to try next. Good luck and friend us if you need support. Good luck!0
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I've had a vertical gastric sleeve and even with us sleevers the diet varies. Some are eating less than 1000 calories a year out. Some like me always eat more because wanted heathy fats in my diet to keep my skin from being baggy. Some won't touch carbs. I do.
You've got to find out what is going to work for you for the rest of your life. My surgery helped me lose enough to start running and have an active life, but I won't be dieting the rest of my life. Why do I want to run? So I can eat more. I don't want to give up the joy of eating.
Don't dispair!!!!! If keeping a healthy weight was easy for all of us or if there was a solution or some magic, Oprah would always be skinny.0 -
I think it is great that there are a lot of different ways to be successful at weight loss. On the other hand, the message boards can be confusing and lots of people think their way is the best.
The site tries to make it simple though, by asking specific questions about you and your lifestyle and then telling you how many calories to eat based on your goals and activity. I followed these guidelines and was successful. This seems like the simplest way to go. If its not working, get opinions in the forums on why not or make small changes until you break your plateau. It sounds like in your case it is working well. The grass is always greener, but if it's working, keep doing it!0 -
I would recommend not polling the average opinion of the forum. The correct answer isn't the average of the group, it is the subset that happens to be correct
Why don't you google a topic and only work with reputable organizations, Mayo and Livestrong are good bets. I suspect you will find everything known and true at the mayo clinic site.0
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