Struggling. Want so badly to find my healthy self...

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shrinkinglily
shrinkinglily Posts: 52
in Motivation and Support
I seem to do well when I start a new diet, for about 2 weeks. I see results, feel great. Then, the unhealthy habits creep back in. I struggle with feeling like it is all or nothing. I either eat no sugar and no white flour, or whatever I feel like in any given moment. I am 30-40 pounds away from being the healthier than I have ever been as an adult. I know there are folks here who have scores more to lose. I feel so close yet so far.

One thing that is hard is that I can't drink caffeine anymore and it was my go-to mood lifter. I miss it and I find myself craving all sorts of other bad things like incredible amount of fat and sugar, alcohol (which I don't enjoy that much past the first few sips) and even smoking which I haven't done for years (and will not do). I am just a bundle of cravings! And it has been 2 months since I gave up daily caffeine, even decaf.

I am just kvetching and any wisdom from those who have busted through their blahs is appreciated.

Replies

  • brendacs21
    brendacs21 Posts: 180 Member
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    Youve kinda described me. i wish i could just eat food in moderation and be happy. i limit myself and lose but im miserable on the other hand my mother in law has been eating in moderation and has almost lost 30 lbs.
  • taramaraiah
    taramaraiah Posts: 2
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    Call me when you have time. I read an awesome book a bit ago, called "secrets to a healthy metabolism"... I'd be happy to loan it to you . It was a good motivational jump start, and totally changed the way I do no sugar/carbs. It teaches why fat is so important, and ever since I upped the fats, I've been without hunger and feeling great. However, I hit a frustrating plateau, and wanted to accelerate loss. If you have a spare $300, you can do a month long nutritional consult with the author, which I decided was worth it. She totally understands all the hormonal/chemical stuff that goes on with bodies, can explain the whys behind cravings, will examine your health to shift you toward optimal health, and is heavy on supplementing to get to optimal health. She's helping me with adrenal fatigue and estrogen imbalance. Supplements tack more $ onto the 300, but I feel like it's worth it, my body feels better than ever. Even if you want to skip the coaching, the book talks a lot about cravings/imbalances.
    Talk to you soon, with love, xoxoxo, T
  • emtron500
    emtron500 Posts: 102 Member
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    If you really can't stick to the diet for more than 2 weeks, may I suggest building "falling off the wagon" right into your diet plan? I find when I say "ok, this Saturday, I'm going to eat EVERYTHING I'm craving and just let loose" then it helps those other days not feel so grim. Then you don't feel guilty because you planned for it, and you can just jump right back to your diet without feeling like all is lost. Better than quitting every time you really feel the need to give in to your cravings.
  • bradphil87
    bradphil87 Posts: 617 Member
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    I have struggled with very intense cravings a lot in my past. I was a drug addict for several years and also and alcoholic for a few years as well....I have also conquered smoking too. Of all these things I think that the booze was the hardest to quit. It took me many months to get over it. But you do come out stronger after!!!' I promise!!!!
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
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    Sounds like you've cut too much of the things you enjoy from your life to drop this weight.

    Try to work on controlling your portions at first. Don't cut too much initially. Make slow changes to your diet so you can acclimate along the way to your new eating habits. Take baby steps. You didn't gain weight overnight, and it's important to be patient and teach yourself new habits so you can maintain your healthy lifestyle forever.
  • PulchritudinousLady
    PulchritudinousLady Posts: 66 Member
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    I can completely relate. Particularly this week. bleh.

    Since beginning this journey towards being "healthy" I now recognize that "healthiness" describes a friggin' wrecking ball that knocks out all of the walls I built around my emotions -- and these walls are massive! Instead of feeling anything, I've always scrambled towards meeting any craving. When I was younger it was exercise, or smoking, or drinking, or sex with *kitten*; mustn't forget thankless jobs, or pot, or shopping...and now, food. I've never been overweight but here I am, up a new creek just because I can't be okay with myself.

    I know this is difficult but it sounds like you've successfully rooted out negative stuff in your life before (to quit smoking is tough and SMART -- you're lungs thank you!), thus, we can do this! Perhaps we'll figure out the root causes of our instability soon enough to reach our weight goals soon!

    Hang in there! You aren't alone!
  • lilylight
    lilylight Posts: 128 Member
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    Call me when you have time. I read an awesome book a bit ago, called "secrets to a healthy metabolism"... I'd be happy to loan it to you . It was a good motivational jump start, and totally changed the way I do no sugar/carbs. It teaches why fat is so important, and ever since I upped the fats, I've been without hunger and feeling great. However, I hit a frustrating plateau, and wanted to accelerate loss. If you have a spare $300, you can do a month long nutritional consult with the author, which I decided was worth it. She totally understands all the hormonal/chemical stuff that goes on with bodies, can explain the whys behind cravings, will examine your health to shift you toward optimal health, and is heavy on supplementing to get to optimal health. She's helping me with adrenal fatigue and estrogen imbalance. Supplements tack more $ onto the 300, but I feel like it's worth it, my body feels better than ever. Even if you want to skip the coaching, the book talks a lot about cravings/imbalances.
    Talk to you soon, with love, xoxoxo, T

    Thanks, this is a really helpful post!
  • AngieSchaible
    AngieSchaible Posts: 84 Member
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    Well , you could try the special k diet (which makes you replace 2 meals with a bowl of cereal and 1 k bar a day for a snack )

    That diet helped me drop 6 lbs not to mention I learned a lot about going by the serving size on any food.

    (An now I eat only what the serving is even if there is times I crave more like any other lol)
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,547 Member
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    Your issue is...........YOU'RE DIETING. Diets are temporary. They usually always are. Learn the actual lifestyle of how to eat what you like in moderation and making sure you get in your daily macro/micro nutrients without going over an allotted calorie limit. People who are usually fit and healthy don't diet. They just don't over eat and have some exercise activity of some sort on a daily basis.


    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • christyb77
    christyb77 Posts: 30 Member
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    I so totally can relate to you. I have a issue with eating fast food. I do well and loose weight in the beginning and then i fall off the wagon. I try to do the eat in moderation so I can eat most foods i love and lay off so much take out and sweets. Still I always fail. I am sure w will both succeed, Love and Hugs
  • lrd2010
    lrd2010 Posts: 161 Member
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    Do you have a medical issue that has made you give up the caffeine?

    I decided when I started out that there would be no denial this time round, everything would be available to me, I just had to be brutally honest with the portion sizes - weigh and measure every morsel - and write it all down on my food diary.

    As long as I count it I can have it.

    Denial causes the human brain to rebel. It's better to let it have the cup of coffee every now and again unless it actively causes you damage. Then you move that focus to something else instead.

    (I actually took up knitting to redirect the boredom eating that was causing me all the problems - but that's another story :) )
  • auroranflash
    auroranflash Posts: 3,569 Member
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    Your issue is...........YOU'RE DIETING. Diets are temporary. They usually always are. Learn the actual lifestyle of how to eat what you like in moderation and making sure you get in your daily macro/micro nutrients without going over an allotted calorie limit. People who are usually fit and healthy don't diet. They just don't over eat and have some exercise activity of some sort on a daily basis.


    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

    ^ It takes some time to develop a good routine you can live with, but once you do, you will start seeing the results you want. A lot of times, people try too much, too soon - big changes are hard to adhere to. Start with simple things, like planning meals and bringing your lunch to work, adding more veggies to your diet. Learn to calorie count and hold yourself accountable to it. Make small substitutions. Vow to get at least 30 minutes of exercise 3-5 times a week, whatever you can muster. And stick to it.

    Best of luck.
  • shrinkinglily
    shrinkinglily Posts: 52
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    Thanks everyone, what great feedback.

    Caffeine does cause me harm, as hard as it is to admit it. I do have the occasional cup but even decaf and tea effect my sleep and anxiety levels. It is sad sad sad because I love coffee so so much!

    The hardest thing is self-soothing without my old vices. Sugar never sued to be one for me but I have started going crazy since stopping caffeine and that is why I am trying to cut it out. Ditto chips and snacks.

    Tara, I would love tor read that book. I've been wanting to call you, let's hang out soon!

    Today I made a big veggies curry with brown rice and ate half for breakie and will take the other half to work with me. And tonight I have an organic beef pot roast to make. I need savory foods to help balance the sugar cravings!
  • taramaraiah
    taramaraiah Posts: 2
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    Aaaaw, you're welcome! Glad it had good info for you:)

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